Dude, You're A Fag Part 8

Being mobilized as an ident.i.ty resource was quite jarring. When boys positioned me as a potential s.e.xual partner, none of them seemed concerned about my thoughts or desires about my own s.e.xual availability. In trying to create a "least-gendered ident.i.ty" or responding by copying their joking strategy, I was able to maintain rapport with them, maintain my own self-respect, and earn some of theirs. I distanced myself in terms of both gender and age from being a "girl"

or a "boy" by refraining from girlish squealing or joining in boys' objectification of girls, a strategy that would probably not have worked for me. I also distanced myself from recognizably adult behaviors by refraining from expressing disapproval of dirty talk, expressing offense, or attempting to enforce discipline. Instead, I struck a balance, not joining in with this sort of talk and not reporting it to school faculty. By occupying a less gendered and less age-defined position, I was able to maintain rapport with the boys, while also helping to preserve some of the more troubling aspects of gender inequalities in this school.

Using the masculine capital I had at my deployment often meant that I didn't challenge s.e.xist and h.o.m.ophobic behavior among the teenage boys. This is a challenge for feminist researchers studying adolescent masculinity-maintaining rapport with boys while not validating their belief systems and gender prejudices.

What If a Guy Hits on You? / 193 193 I walked a tightrope in managing my allegiance to other teenage girls and my need to gather data from the boys who mocked them. When I could, I used masculine joking strategies to best other boys without simultaneously invoking feminizing or h.o.m.ophobic insults. I also had to maintain a balance between distanc-ing myself from femininity and not disparaging it. While I may have challenged gender stereotypes by decoupling s.e.x and gender in utilizing masculine interactional strategies and cultural capital, this research approach failed to challenge the s.e.xist underpinnings of masculine ident.i.ties at River High.

The other feminist challenge I encountered was around my personal and political concerns in terms of the non-normatively gendered girls at River High.

These girls were carving out new ways of being teenage girls in which they played with, maneuvered around, and challenged conventional gender and s.e.xual norms. I saw them both as the products of years of feminist activism and as reflections of myself in high school. When I couldn't be as honest about my own life or as active around my political beliefs as I wanted to, I felt frustrated, drained and, quite frankly, as if I were betraying them.

Researchers' own subjectivities are central to ethnographic research, as feminist methodologists have long demonstrated (Arendell 1997; Boreland 1991; Harding 1987). Paying attention to my own feelings and desires as the boys drew me into their masculinizing rituals helped me to recognize processes of masculinity I otherwise might have missed. In this way my own feelings and experiences were central to the data I gathered. My own horror at being involved in these processes led to a gendered ident.i.ty strategy that both elicited more information from the boys and frequently stopped short of challenging their s.e.xism.

NOTES.CHAPTER 1.1. This is not to say that women don't possess this sort of subjectivity, but these qualities are what students at River High a.s.sociate with masculinity.

2. While trying to retain the insight that there are multiple masculinities that vary by time and place, I self-consciously use the singular masculinity masculinity in this text because students at River talk about masculinity as a singular ident.i.ty that involves practices and discourses of s.e.xualized power and mastery. in this text because students at River talk about masculinity as a singular ident.i.ty that involves practices and discourses of s.e.xualized power and mastery.

3. I make this claim on the basis of the administrators' opinions and my respondents' descriptions of their parents' jobs.

CHAPTER 2.1. That said, gender ident.i.ties and s.e.xual norms are not simply unidirectional socialization processes. Youth also contribute to and reconfigure "official" teachings about gender and s.e.xuality. They contribute their own knowledge and contest official school norms and teachings (Trudell 1993). I address these challenges to authority and received wisdom in later chapters.

2. Other authors call this the "hidden curriculum" (Campbell and Sanders 2002; Letts and Sears 1999; J. Martin 1976). I choose to use Trudell's term because I think what is going on in high school is less about uncovering the hidden than it is about the informal way teachers and students structure s.e.xuality by drawing on popular and shared definitions.

195.

196 / Notes to Pages 2871 Notes to Pages 2871 3. While I never initiated conversations about "s.e.xual ident.i.ty development"

in my interviews, students talked about s.e.x all the time in both formal and informal settings. So much of this book is composed of these discussions.

4. There always seemed to be tension over the dress code. It was continually experienced by students as an infringement on their right to free expression.

5. River High was not unique in establis.h.i.+ng policies that encouraged a gender-differentiated heteros.e.xuality; indeed, social policy frequently const.i.tutes heteros.e.xuality as both normal and natural (Carabine 1998).

6. They called it the "Wrestling World" after a real event that happened each spring at River High. The sports director was a former pro wrestler. He invited his current pro-wrestler colleagues to come to River to put on a show for the community, an immensely popular event that sold out quickly.

7. Ricky was one of the few "out" gay boys at the school. Ironically, he played a hyperheteros.e.xualized role in this dance routine. This may have something to do with why the administrators allowed him to dance so sensually. However, a white boy and girl danced together in one other routine that included extensive cross-gender touching.

8. While none of the students I asked could tell me why why they were frustrated about being called the Pep Squad, my guess is the connotations of the name were problematic. they were frustrated about being called the Pep Squad, my guess is the connotations of the name were problematic. Pep squad Pep squad invokes a bunch of smiling invokes a bunch of smiling white white girls with blond ponytails performing for the student body. This group of black students adopted a name that deployed the hip-hop vernacular of "da bomb," meaning something really great, to connote a tougher, more streetwise, more legitimate club name. girls with blond ponytails performing for the student body. This group of black students adopted a name that deployed the hip-hop vernacular of "da bomb," meaning something really great, to connote a tougher, more streetwise, more legitimate club name.

9. The term s.e.xual and gender regimes s.e.xual and gender regimes in the t.i.tle of this section is a modification of R. W. Connell's (1996) idea of "gender regimes," which he uses to refer to the sum of gender relations in a given school. in the t.i.tle of this section is a modification of R. W. Connell's (1996) idea of "gender regimes," which he uses to refer to the sum of gender relations in a given school.

CHAPTER 3.1. In fact, two of my colleagues, both psychotherapists, suggested that the boys exhibited what we could think of as a sort of "f.a.g Tourette's Syndrome."

2. Though River was not a particularly violent school, it may have seemed like that to Ricky because s.e.xuality-based hara.s.sment increases with grade level as gender differentiation becomes more intense. As youth move from childhood into adolescence there is less flexibility in terms of gender ident.i.ty and self-presentation (Shakib 2003).

3. There were two other gay boys at the school. One, Corey, I learned about Notes to Pages 72102 / Notes to Pages 72102 / 197 197 after a year of fieldwork. While he wasn't "closeted," he was not well known at the school and kept a low profile. The other out gay boy at the school was Brady.

While he didn't engage in the masculinity rituals of the other boys at River High, he didn't cross-dress or engage in feminine-coded activities as did Ricky. As such, when boys talked about f.a.gs, they referenced Ricky, not Brady or Corey.

CHAPTER 4.1. This is not to say that similar enactments of dominance and control don't occur among gay men. But such behavior is out of the scope of this study, since there were not enough self-identified gay boys at this school from which to draw conclusions about the way s.e.xual discussions and practices interacted with masculinity for gay boys.

2. I am also indebted to Michael Kimmel's (1987) argument that masculinity itself must be compulsively expressed and constantly proven, something he calls "compulsive masculinity."

3. Chris Rock is a popular comedian. This routine is a fictionalized account in which he both plays himself and imitates Michael Jackson. The "Neverland"

Chris Rock refers to is Michael Jackson's whimsical ranch in California.

4. Heath's behavior is a good ill.u.s.tration of how a boy's engagement with the "f.a.g discourse" might vary by context. While in drama performances neither he nor Graham engaged in the f.a.g discourse, outside that context both of them did.

5. That said, if anyone called this sort of behavior s.e.xual hara.s.sment, it would more likely be girls than boys, since women are more likely than men to label so-called flirtatious behaviors as hara.s.sment (Quinn 2002).

6. Wh.o.r.e, Wh.o.r.e, however, is equivalent to however, is equivalent to f.a.g f.a.g only in that both boys and girls agree it is the worst insult one can direct toward a girl, much as only in that both boys and girls agree it is the worst insult one can direct toward a girl, much as f.a.g f.a.g is for a boy. That said, girls do not frantically lob the insult is for a boy. That said, girls do not frantically lob the insult wh.o.r.e wh.o.r.e at one another in order to sh.o.r.e up a feminine ident.i.ty the way boys do with at one another in order to sh.o.r.e up a feminine ident.i.ty the way boys do with f.a.g f.a.g regarding a masculine ident.i.ty. regarding a masculine ident.i.ty.

Both f.a.g f.a.g and and wh.o.r.e, wh.o.r.e, however, do invoke someone who has been penetrated, which is a powerless position. however, do invoke someone who has been penetrated, which is a powerless position.

7. Muscles, in many boys' interviews, were central to understandings of one-self and others as masculine. Later in the chapter we see that boys are obsessed with size; in just about every realm, bigger is better.

8. Transitional periods are the time when students are most at risk for hara.s.sment and bullying (N. Stein 2002).

9. Jack Daniels, a relatively inexpensive whiskey.

198 / Notes to Pages 103160 Notes to Pages 103160 10. The research on smiling and giggling as practices of submission is mixed.

Most of the research indicates that the meanings invoked by a smile depend on the context in which it is given, by whom and to whom (LaFrance 2002; Mast and Hall 2004).

CHAPTER 5.1. Though after my research ended, toward the end of her senior year, Riley started to identify as transgendered.

2. While they recognized themselves as distinct groups, they did not have a label for themselves, nor did others. The majority of youth at River High did not use group labels, with the exception of the term jocks, jocks, to describe others in their school. For a more thorough discussion of the importance of the category of to describe others in their school. For a more thorough discussion of the importance of the category of "jock" in high school, see Pascoe (2003).

3. See Best (2000, 2004), Gordon, Holland, and Lahelma (2000), Bettie (2003), Kehily (2000), and K. Martin (1996) for discussions of adolescent female femininity.

4. Several girls followed this same routine at each formal dance I attended.

They would wear formal dress for the pictures and quickly change into jeans and/or more comfortable shoes.

5. While these terms were originated by Joseph Howell (1973), I take this description from Julie Bettie's (2003) discussion of teenage girls at Waretown High.

CHAPTER 6.1. Janet Halley (1993) examines how those who are thrown out of the discursive and legal category of "heteros.e.xual" lose definitional power over their own ident.i.ty. Much as the threat of the "f.a.g" disciplines boys into certain behavioral practices, the threat of being excluded from the category "heteros.e.xual"

functions as a bribe to keep people silent and thus reinforces the false unity of the category itself.

2. Indeed, part of what students recognize as masculinity is its very public nature. That is, masculinity, according to the youth at River High, is what happens when boys (and some girls) are in groups, not necessarily what happens when they are in private.

3. Youth at River did identify a third racial/ethnic group-youth from Mex-ico who didn't speak English. They were a small group who primarily kept to Notes to Pages 161174 / Notes to Pages 161174 / 199 199 themselves. Unfortunately, I didn't speak any Spanish, so I was unable to include them in this study.

4. Hochschild (1989) uses the phrase gender strategies gender strategies to refer to the ways that men and women develop a plan of action with which to solve a problem given current gender norms. Though she uses it to describe the way men and women negotiate work and housework, it is equally apt in this instance. Drawing upon definitions of femininity and masculinity, girls deploy a variety of gender strategies to deal with often-damaging masculinity practices. to refer to the ways that men and women develop a plan of action with which to solve a problem given current gender norms. Though she uses it to describe the way men and women negotiate work and housework, it is equally apt in this instance. Drawing upon definitions of femininity and masculinity, girls deploy a variety of gender strategies to deal with often-damaging masculinity practices.

5. Another helpful resource for educational films is Women's Educational Media (www.womedia.org). They distribute a film ent.i.tled It's Elementary: Talking about Gay Issues in School It's Elementary: Talking about Gay Issues in School as part of their "Respect for All" project. as part of their "Respect for All" project.

6. Several organizations provide resources for forming Gay/Straight Alliances and for supporting gender-variant youth: the Gay, Lesbian, and Straight Education Network (www.glsen.org), The Gay Straight Alliance Network (www.gsanetwork.org), and GenderPAC (www.gpac.org).

7. The inst.i.tute for Gay and Lesbian Strategic Studies makes suggestions for school reform in their publication "Going beyond Gay Straight Alliances to Make Schools Safe for Lesbian, Gay, Bis.e.xual and Transgender Students," accessible at www.iglss.org/pubs/highlights/highlights.html.

8. These sorts of curricular resources are produced by the Safe Schools Coalition (www.safeschoolscoalition.org), Gay and Lesbian Educators of British Columbia (www.galebc.org), and Southern Poverty Law Center (www.tolerance .org/teach).

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