The Fading Away of Our Youth (So Young) Vol 2 Chapter 4

Chapter 4

They had graduated for exactly a year when Zheng Wei was overtaken by a red explosion [1]. Returning to the aftermath of He Lu Ya and the senior brother (her boyfriend), their marriage was on a July weekend. Besides the faraway Li Wei Juan in Beijing and Zhu Xiao Bei, the other three people prepared to appear at the marriage. After Zhuo Mei graduated, she fattened up and grew another donut. She and her ideal partner had registered. Don’t talk about love, but her days were very smooth comfortable. After Zheng Wei and Ruan Ruan met, the two people didn’t leave each other. They were all lamenting. It seemed that more simple people could find happiness more easily. Lu Ya was the same. The her who had said she wouldn’t speak of falling in love was actually the first one to marry. Seeing her honest senior brother, faintly smiling in the simple room. This happy woman’s brilliance made the plain her back at 402 seem seem so eye catching. The pretty Ruan Ruan and the pleasant Zheng Wei were overshadowed. He Lu Ya’s love was like a creek. It would trickle into a stream and eventually enter the river and those waves that rose from love would go on forever. Ruan Ruan was right. In love, effort and happiness were never proportional, the people who wanted to love more would be less likely to find it.

[1] red explosion refers to prosperity and happiness.

At night, besides Zhuo Mei who had to hurry home after enjoying the banquet, Ruan Ruan and Zheng Wei stayed in the town He Lu Ya was in. Li Wei Juan called, and scolded He Lu Ya for quite a while about mastering the economic lifestyle. In the end, she still yelled, “You are the first person to marry within our ‘Six Great Empresses’, I really hope I can follow your current. One or two of us find a good destination, and each marry better than the other.” When the three people heard this, they smiled.

Then it was Zhu Xiao Bei who called once. Zheng Wei immediately yelled: “Pig Bei (朱(zhu) which is Zhu Xiao Bei’s surname sounds like 猪(zhu) which means pig ), I’m tired of eating raisins, I miss you to death!”

Zhu Xiao Bei’s laugh was as simple as it had been in the past. She said, “Do you know where I am now? I just returned from eating dinner at my crush’s place, ah, don’t hurry to envy me. Today is his son’s 100 day celebration. He married a local Uygur girl, and his child is as pretty like a mixed blood…I am an excellent gene owner but if it was a child from me and him, it definitely would not be as good as the child he has now. He is living very well, I am very happy. Lu Ya, you’ve married, I’m also happy for you…I am very happy…”

When they sent the happy bride and groom back to the bridal chamber, Ruan Ruan and Zheng Wei walked back to the town’s guest house. Ruan Ruan suddenly said, “Wei Wei, after we go back, I will go ask for a break from work. Can I live at your place for a few days?”

Zheng Wei was extremely happy, “Of course that’s all right…..but don’t you have to work?”

Ruan Ruan said, “I’m pregnant, Wei Wei.”

……

Zheng Wei took two steps back, and used a very incredulous look to look at Ruan Ruan, “Really, really, Ruan Ruan, are you really going to be a mother? It’s amazing!” She happily said this, and carefully looked at her best friend’s flat lower abdomen.

Ruan Ruan only laughed. Only then did the happy Zheng Wei realize that something was wrong, and thus tried asking, “Ruan Ruan, have you told Zhao Yu Yong?”

Ruan Ruan first nodded her head, and then shook it. Zheng Wei didn’t understand, “Did you tell him or not?”

“I saw him a few days ago. I said, Yu Yong, I may be pregnant. He was so scared that his face became a muddy color, and his words weren’t clear. He just continued repeating, No, no, I obviously used safety precautions…” Ruan Ruan laughed as she shook her head, “I obviously knew that he was always like a child that would never grow up, but when I really saw this, I was very disappointed. Thus, later I told him, I was just joking, tricking you into becoming happy. Only then was he relieved.”

Zheng Wei was angry, “That jerk, Zhao Yu Yong. If he didn’t do such a great thing, how would you have a child? But he can’t even bear this point. Ruan Ruan, why did you say you were just joking? Such a big thing. You must tell him that you will marry him immediately. Even if his family isn’t close to you, there isn’t any point in blocking you guys now.”

Ruan Ruan said, “I will not marry him.”

“Why.” Zheng Wei said, “The matter has already gotten to here. If he still isn’t willing to marry, I will be the first one to not spare him!”

“I understand Yu Yong. If I say, let’s marry for this child, he will agree to me. The problem isn’t him, it’s me. Wei Wei, it’s that I cannot marry him. When I said I was pregnant, the moment he became panic stricken, my love for him died. Over the years, I have tried to repair our feelings, but in the end, I am still reluctant to leave him. That is because these are the best feelings from my youth. Only now do I find that these lovers were never like what I imagined. I’ve grown up. He hasn’t yet.”

“But, you guys even have a child. It’s ok if that jerk doesn’t want it, but what about the child?” Zheng Wei worried.

Ruan Ruan pressed her hand on her own abdomen, as if wanting to feel the weak induction and unconsciously softened, but she said, “It’s too bad that it came at the wrong time. I love children, but I am only a common woman, I don’t have a way to be very powerful, and I don’t want to suffer. I don’t want to suffer because of this impulse. Wei Wei, I want to destroy it. This is also why I want to live with you for a few days.”

Zheng Wei pulled Ruan Ruan’s hand, and choked, “Don’t worry, there’s also me. I will always be by your side.”

A droplet of water fell on the two girls’ hands that were woven together, the warmth it brought when it first fell, turned to coldness. She didn’t know whose tears they were.

When they returned to G City, Zheng Wei accompanied Ruan Ruan to the best Medical University Hospital, and did a round of new pregnancy testing. When they had confirmed that the pregnancy had only occurred for 45 days or so, the middle aged female doctor lowered her head and wrote the patient case. She didn’t lift her head as she asked: “Give birth to it or destroy it?” That cold indifference as if the thing in Ruan Ruan’s belly wasn’t a life, but was a tumor.

Ruan Ruan gritted her teeth, “Destroy it.”

Since the fetus hadn’t been 50 days old yet, they could still do an abortion. When they walked out of the medical room, Ruan Ruan suddenly felt very weak. Zehng Wei let her sit in the hallway, and went to go line up for some medicine. At night, in Zheng Wei’s hostel, Ruan Ruan sat in front of the desk for a long time. Taking advantage of Zheng Wei’s absence to go dump the water she opened the beer on the table and drank it all in one gulp. She still remembered, what Zhao Yu Yong said to her when he first taught her how to drink beer, Although the taste is bitter, you have to let to let it gently flow against your tongue and then carefully taste. Then a fragrant flower will bloom on your tongue. But now, the flower is withered. In addition to being bitter, the mouth also feels indifferent and tasteless.

The second day, they returned to the hospital. Ruan Ruan swallowed the second pill in the maternity specific room. Her contractions were stronger than the other woman in the same ward. The other female patients all had their husbands or boyfriends to accompany them, but she only had Zheng Wei by her side. Zheng Wei sat beside the bed, and watched her tightly curled against the wall, never making a sound. The messy hair on her face had been soaked by sweat, sticking to the face that had no color at all.

Zheng Wei was frightened to death. She staggered to the next door clinic and told the circ.u.mstances to the doctor. The doctor only told her lightly that every person’s const.i.tution was different. Some people were just like having an official holiday while others felt like a ghostlike door had slammed and was turning in circles. It as all normal. There wasn’t any need to fuss. Zheng Wei became more anxious. She was already like this, and he still said fuss. But she controlled herself. This time when she fought with the doctor it was unwise. She could only go back to Ruan Ruan’s side, and plea that it would over quickly. After half an hour, Ruan Ruan insisted on sitting up, and let Zheng Wei go with her to the bathroom. She closed the door for a long time, Zheng Wei didn’t dare press her, but instead worried so much. She could only wander around outside the bathroom. After about 10 minutes, Ruan Ruan came out. She had a piece of a white tissue on her hand. She returned to the maternity room, and the doctor opened that napkin. A small meat like object was revealed and the doctor used a cotton swab to flip it over a few times.

Every time the doctor made a sudden motion, Zheng Wei would feel her heart violently tighten. A few times, she basically couldn’t breathe. However, Ruan Ruan kept watching the doctor’s reaction as watching someone else’s game.

“All right, the embryo has been exhausted. You guys can leave. When you get back, take medicine based on the prescription. After you rest for a few days you’ll be all right.”

The two had just walked to the entrance when the doctor called them, “Oh, you guys should bring this too. Throw it away in the bathroom in front.”

Ruan Ruan held it in her hand. When she pa.s.sed the bathroom, she lightly threw it into the trash can. After walking on a few steps, Zheng Wei suddenly turned. Ruan Ruan stopped her, “Don’t look back.”

Until they exited the big doors of the hospital, was Zheng Wei incredulous. A life had just been extinguished just like this, just because it had appeared at the wrong time? As if she could sense her thoughts, the staggering Ruan Ruan answered her, “It’s a little cruel. Before, how could we know, feelings would be b.l.o.o.d.y. This is also good. I have cleaned myself of the last thing he has left me.”

Zheng Wei was speechless, and had just thought of G.o.d when she heard a man approach and yell, “Ha, it’s you, the one that loves crying!”

She looked all around her, but besides them there wasn’t anyone else, but that man was obviously a stranger. She conflictedly raised her head, “Do you want to speak to me….who are you? You’ve recognized the wrong person right?”

That boy laughed loudly, “How could I have gotten it wrong? Even if you’ve turned a little grey, I still know you. Four years ago or five years ago, you came. At least, it was when we were soph.o.m.ores in graduate school. You were in my dormitory and crouching in front of me, crying like a river on a mountain, the birdds were all scared. In the end, I still had to escort you to a bus. Even if you’ve forgotten, I will never forget it. After you finished crying you patted your b.u.t.t and left. As for me, I became the infamous ungrateful guy in front of my girlfriend who had to explain for such a long time before things got clear.”

Zheng Wei heard this and her face became red with bursts of whiteness. It was him. Lin Jing’s old dormmate. This matter was very embarra.s.sing. If I was shameless in the end, does he have no way to take me away?

That guy didn’t know her thoughts, and when he saw her silent, he automatically thougth she recognized her, and familiarly asked, “How is it, are you sick?”

“Oh, no, I’m accompanying my friend to see a doctor.”

That boy nodded his head, “It’s like that. My wife just gave birth to a son, and I have come to pick her up from the hospital. Is Lin Jing not coming to pick you up?”

“Lin…ah?” Zheng Wei couldn’t quite wrap her mind around the situation. What andwhat?

That man had always someone who followed the wind [2], and immediately found that what he said may have been a bit wrong, “Sorry, you and Lin Jing aren’t together? I thought…the day after you left, Lin Jing called me from America, and let me mail that book of fairy tales to him immediately. Later I told him, the book was taken by a maiden who cried extremely hard. He didn’t speak for a long time. You guys didn’t contact each other afterwards?”

[2] Follows the wind: Basically means following the current, and going with what the other person does.

Zheng Wei busily shook her head, “Sorry, my friend is a little uncomfortable, we will go first.”

“Oh, wait.” That guy must have had a good friends.h.i.+p with Lin Jing and said again, “Last year, Lin Jing returned to China. He even said he was going to come to look for you. You guys never met, right now he is in……”

“I don’t want to know!” Zheng Wei immediately interrupted him, and then felt his att.i.tude was too blunt. The other person had good intentions, not to mention that he had to comfort her in her most painful moment, “Sorry, the matter has already pa.s.sed, I really don’t want to know.”

She didn’t know if people who learned law had a unique sensitivity. That boy turned into a different person according to the girl, and immediately brought out a piece of paper from his pocket and a pen and wrote some numbers on it. “Lin Jing’s number, hold it, just have it, contacting him is up to you.”

Zheng Wei put her two hands behind her back, and in the end, Ruan Ruan took the piece of paper. When they said goodbye, and sat on a taxi, Ruan Ruan put the piece of paper on Zheng Wei’s lap. With force, she said, “Silly girl, why should you make life difficult with your temporary mood?”

Zheng Wei grabbed the paper. She didn’t even look at it and crumpled it into a ball. In the end, she threw it out the car window. When the car window went up, she looked at her reflection in the gla.s.s. Some tears flashed in those eyes.

That person said that Lin Jing came to find her a year ago. She wasn’t surprised, but he had already left for four years, about 1460 days. In these days, in her most painful, hopeless times, where had he been?

Ruan Ruan sighed, “Secretary Zheng, do you know that throwing things out the window will get you a fine?”

Zheng Wei kept looking out the window. After a long time did she say, “If I was willing to accept the fine, would the police officer return me the evidence?”

Tranz: Next chapter will be sum-lated as part of it continues a bit of the aftermath of the abortion and goes into other things.