Netoge no Yome wa Onnanoko ja Nai to Omotta? Volume 3 Chapter 2 Part1

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It’s another week late, but I’m done with this part for now. I’ve been transitioning from my previous job for the past month so I wasn’t able to get anything done but I should be able to continue at a steadier pace from now (maybe 2 weeks a part? I can’t really tell because the author never sets a length for chapters/parts i.e. some are just plain longer than others). I originally planned to release this last week as well, but I wasn’t able to work on it as I’ve caught a pretty nasty flu yet again (so I just went with playing MMOs  and sleeping all day).

The usual excuses aside, reading ahead, I’m just wondering how to format all these different channels they talk in. For this particular chapter, I just used curly braces for the phone calls so you don’t get lost. This chapter is mostly what was cut out from the anime for that beach part (the main thing explaining why it seems nothing got resolved after the Sette incident). If there seems to be inconsistencies with words I’ve used (cafe/tavern), it’s probably because it’s been a month and I have short term memory loss.

Also, I didn’t notice that the pity party part was about Schew before when I read it (speed reading is bad folks), so it actually hints it on pretty early about well, Schew’s feelings. If I can ever get to translating up to Volume 12, you’ll be seeing a lot more of her gap moe then. For now, just enjoy this part of a chapter (Chapter 1 is already 1/3 of the whole volume by the way).

Chapter 2 Sea Ya at the Exhilarating Summer Camp

TL note: Reference to Pangya Exhilarating Golf

Part 1

Translation: Yamaking

A cold breeze enveloped my whole body as I opened the door into the cafe.

Suddenly cooling down my body, which was completely drenched with sweat, felt really awful.

"Welcome— A table for one I presume?"

"Urk—"

A table for one.

I choked in response to the employee who had no trace of malicious intent behind their words at all.

"…E, err, my friends should have already arrived before me."

"Ah, so you're the companion of that group then. This way please."

It's a place I've been to before. Yep, it's where we held our first offline meeting.

And waiting there for me were the same people from back then.

"G, good work today."

"…Indeed."

I was led into the area where the two of them were waiting.

Over there was Master, with a difficulty expression on her face, and Segawa, who had a stiff smile plastered on hers.

It was the same place as that time, with the same people. And just like that time, I'm also feeling a bit nervous.

But— Ako is not here.

Ako… Didn't come back with me.

"Sorry for having you come all the way out here."

As I was half in tears, reporting my complete rejection to the two of them, they then suddenly told me to come to the shop in front of the station.

I feel really horrible right now, but having people who would come for me in my time of need is really rea.s.suring.

I'm really thankful for these friends of mine.

"Also Master, you even rented out the whole place again?"

"I originally intended it for Schwein's pity party though."

"I'm telling you! You have the wrong idea! In the first place, it's not even going to be a pity party any… Ah."

"I told you already, it's alright."

It IS actually a pity party though.

Having all the strength seep away from my body, I went to sit on the chair.

"…"

"…"

"…!"

"…~~!"

It feels as if she's pressing me for details, as Segawa keeps scooting over to my side every time after our eyes meet.

"Uhm… err, I don't know if I should ask this but…"

"Yeah."

"…Did she turn you down?"

"…Yeah."

"Seriously?"

"Seriously."

"Really?"

"Really, I'm telling you."

"Are you sure it wasn't just some misunderstanding? Or maybe it's just an unlucky case of not being on the same wavelength?"

"I was blatantly rejected."

"Are you really, really sure that 'Ako' rejected 'Nis.h.i.+mura's' confession?"

"Yeah I'm sure! I got rejected! That's what I've been telling you since earlier! Just what else do you want me to say!? Are you bullying me!? Are you just bullying me huh!?"

"Ah no, sorry, it was my fault! Uhm, how about we get something sweet to eat? Would you like a parfait? That should lighten up your mood a little bit right?"

This act of kindness from Segawa hurts. But I'm frustrated that I'm also a bit happy because of this.

I wonder if she's laughing at me thinking 'serves you right for trying to be a normie!'.

"Just what was Ako thinking I wonder? This has to be the first time I've seen her bait someone cruelly like that."

"Well she flawlessly pulled that one off then… Hahaha…"

"But I just can't believe this. That Ako-kun would do something like that…"

Master groaned saying that.

"I don't want to believe it either… Even now I still don't…"

Regardless of what they've said, this is still me confessing to another person here. Saying that it'll definitely turn out alright is pretty much just an opinion on their part.

"Haa… It was all just my misunderstanding… I got too carried away and the end result is this… Haha, hahaha…"

"Goodness gracious, how did it turn out like this?"

"How did it turn out like this?"

They then started doing some strange dance but I didn't have the willpower to retort.

TL note: This is a reference to another copypasta which can be found here (). The dance can be seen on said page as well (also shown in the anime).

They danced for some time while looking over my depressed state. After a while, the two of them stopped moving.

"So Rusian isn't even going to retort on this huh?"

"It seems he was really rejected."

Just what basis are you using to determine that?

"I cant take dis anymore. I'm done with Ako. Even though I loved her so much, that vixen was just playing with me!"

TL note: This is another copypasta (lookup もぅマヂ無理 ) where the writing of the first part of the sentence starts out juvenile but the tone gradually progresses in the harshness of the choice of words. I just tried to word it as simple as I could. The part below this is also part of the copypasta.

"He seems to be unexpectedly doing fine."

There's no way I'm fine. Not at all.

"Ah— I want to die. Ah no, I guess I'll go kill myself now. Guess I'll die. This seems like a good chance, brb killing myself!"

"Calm down, calm down. Don't go slitting your wrist now."

Seriously, I just can't open up to people who talk as if they know about the situation when they're not the one suffering.

"But you know, I just can't believe it after all."

Segawa said that as she lightly patted me on the back.

"I mean, it's that Ako you know? It's that girl who doesn't seem to think of anything besides the single word 'Rusian' you know? I can't imagine her doing all that just to bait you like that."

"I wholeheartedly agree."

Even if you tell me that, talking about it even more just feels like you're rubbing salt in the wound.

"That's… that's what I think too but…"

"Ah, sorry, sorry."

I mustn’t cry. I mustn't.

My throat feels parched after going through all those thoughts.

I wonder if this is just one of the downs of youth? …As if I even have the leeway to think about something like that.

"I was betrayed… Ako betrayed me… It's like I was given a guild quest saying it would be really easy, but when I go in the instance I suddenly get killed by a monster immediately upon sp.a.w.ning at the base camp."

"I call hacks."

"At least call it before I go in."

I had no idea before even diving in that she would do such a thing.

"Argh, why don't we just ask Ako directly whether or not she really did dump you?"

"True, that could work as well."

"If you want to go do that then go ahead."

As soon as I said that, they began exchanging glances as they looked at their phones placed on top of the table.

"…Aren't you going to call her, Master?"

"I think it would be more appropriate for Schwein, who is in the same grade as her, to ask this."

"Isn't this normally the job of the guild master though?"

It looks like they've suddenly begun squabbling while completely ignoring me!

"Why are you two even fighting!? Either one of you is fine!"

"But… Needlessly getting your hopes up like that…"

"…And being the one to say, 'It's no good, she really dumped you' is a bit…"

"…Overkill, don't you think?"

"I think it's bad manners to teabag your opponent's corpses."

"Uwaaaaaaa!"

I don't want this anymoreeeeee! I don't want to live on this planet anymoreeeeee!

I repeatedly banged my head on the table. Ah, it hurts. Feels good man. Guess I'll die.

"Sorry, sorry, sorry! It's all my fault!"

Are you going to console me or finish me off? Well? Which is it?

"I suppose it can't be helped. I'll take responsibility for this as your guild master."

Master finally picked up her phone.

Her phone gave off a light ringing sound. 'Ring, ring, ring'. h.e.l.l is that noise.

And then, as Master brought up the phone to her ear, a soft voice could be heard from it.

{Yes, h.e.l.lo? This is Tamaki speaking.}

"That girl actually uses her last name when she answers the phone huh?"

Segawa just voiced her opinion on something I couldn't care any less about.

"…Actually, she sounds really normal."

So turning me down is just business as usual huh? …Haa… That really hurts.

"Hmm, don't you think this is strange? Even if you say she turned you down, is she really going to have no reaction just like that?"

"It was the same when she turned down Takasaki that time too."

"That's because it was Takasaki."

After hearing what we were talking about, Master then continued to talk on her phone.

"Sorry for calling you all of sudden, but there's something I'd like to ask you. Is that fine?"

{I've been reading the strategy Wiki… I mean, the magazine from earlier so ask away.}

So she actually got to reading that magazine huh?

"Err, you see… it's… about your walk home from school today…"

I guess this is hard for Master to say, even with her usual vainglory.

After taking a few deep breaths, she finally asked her.

"Did Rusian— say anything to you?"

{Rusian you say?}

Ako still seemed to be acting normal even after being asked that.

{Nothing really… Ah! I think I remember being told something strange.}

"Ugh!"

That statement surprised all three of us which caused us to twitch.

"Strange, you say?"

As Master was waiting in antic.i.p.ation for the answer, Ako simply replied.

{Uhm… Rusian told me something like 'Please become my girlfriend'}

"Y, you, you really told her that huh?"

"Of course I told her…"

I wouldn't be this b.u.mmed about it if I didn't.

It seems like in their heads, maybe there was a chance that Ako just didn't get to hear my confession. But you should be able to see for yourself when you see just how shaken up I am.

"So then, how did you reply to that?"

Ako then replied to Master's inquiry.

{How, you say? Of course I said—

— No way.}

"AaaAaAAaaaAAAAaaaAAA!!!!!"

A strange noise just emanated from my throat. Master then hurriedly set her phone to mute.

"Uwaaa, so it was actually real."

"This… can't be…"

"It's all… over…"

I want to die. I just want to hurry up and disappear…

"I, it's fine! Even if Ako is not here, the two of us are still with you!"

I wanted Ako to be here with me though…

"I won't get mad, so give me a serious rep here… Why Ako? Is there something about Rusian that does not satisfy you?"

Master seemed like she's almost about to blow her top asking Ako that.

I don't want to hear about this anymore. If they keep this up, my life will really go down to zero.

But just as I was about to cover my ears,

{Eh, but…}

Her reply coming from the cellphone leaked out,

{Going from a married couple to boyfriend and girlfriend sounds like a divorce right?}

And I heard,

{And I don't want that at all!}

Ako's voice.

"Don't you give me that c.r.a.p nooooooow!"

"Ni, Nis.h.i.+mura, calm down…"

Do you think I can calm down after hearing that!?

Just what do you want?!

Just what did you think I was trying to do by pouring everything I've got in that confession!?

{Oh, Rusian? Are you there?}

I guess it makes sense for her to hear after all that.

"Ah sorry, I just hit someone friendly fire."

"Friendly fire? Ah no, that's not what I'm asking about. Is Rusian there right now?"

"I just hit someone with friendly fire."

{…O, okay.}

Ako was forced to accept Master's nonsensical excuse.

{Uhm, about that thing you asked earlier… Rusian was laughing by the end of it so I thought it was just a joke. It really gave me a shock.}

"I'm the one shocked here though…"

"Though speaking of Nis.h.i.+mura that time, you were probably forcing yourself into a dry laughter huh…"

Segawa said that as if she's fed up with it all.

'Haha… Hahaha…' was how I laughed back then. It felt like my throat was going to crack just by doing it.

"I, I see. I understand now. Sorry for asking you something so strange."

{Okaaay.}

"Well, bye then."

And just like that, Master finished their conversation.

She then faced towards us while keeping a sullen expression on her face.

"It might be a bit late to say this now but…"

She said that with a terribly serious look.

"Isn't Ako-kun quite amazing?"

"That's what I've been telling you before!"

The gla.s.s containing water shook as I hit the table it was placed on.

"Ah darn it… Just what is this? Was I rejected or not? Which is it?"

"Your confession fell through… I guess…"

"In the first place, she didn't understand what you were going for anyway."

In response to this unforeseen circ.u.mstance, all three of us were currently grasping our heads in confusion.

That girl is really living in the future isn't she? Even I didn't expect this.

"If you just followed up on it, it wouldn't have led to this kind of misunderstanding that only Ako could think of."

"But you know, I think Ako's been acting normal for the most part recently."

'I know right?', is what Segawa also said in wonder.

"Just a while ago, she told me that Rusian met her parents and they're now engaged or something. So I figured that she at least knew that you both weren't married in real life."

"That's what I thought too that's why I went ahead with this."

And the result is as you can see.

"The problem lies exactly in there, you two."

Master, who was just mulling over it, slowly began to raise her head and carefully spoke out.

"I've realized this after hearing both of your viewpoints… but, I think we're taking Ako too lightly."

"Making light of her… you say?"

"Our goal was to make Ako realize the difference between games and reality. In our point of view, we were aiming to correct Ako-kun since she seemed to be lacking understanding of things. However, to her, we probably just looked like a stubborn group that just she decided to play along with it. Don't you think so?"

"She's just playing along with… us…"

Segawa gulped as she said that.

Naturally, even I got even more nervous.

"In other words, everything that we've been trying to lecture Ako-kun on has been pa.s.sing through one ear and going through the other, no?"

Master trembled with fear as she said that.

"'If you say so, then sure it is. At least in your head, it is.'— something like that."

"'Sure whatever you say lol'… that kind of thing?"

"In one ear and out the other huh…"

I can't say that this kind of situation is not possible at all.

"If it were just that, then it would be better. But the real trouble starts from here."

Master lowered the tone of her voice.

"I'm sure that Ako realizes that her marriage with Rusian is not a fact in reality. Going by standards set by the law and taking your ages into account, this is just not possible. In addition to that, we keep pressing unto her the idea that games and reality are separate. As a result, she's very prudent and well grounded in her choice of actions."

You're going to describe her with those?

"That has to be the last choice of words that I would describe Ako with though."

"I feel the same way… And just what do you mean choice of actions?"

"Even though we're forcefully trying to correct her, she generally holds Rusian's opinion in the highest regard. Without going against Rusian's ideas, she carefully plans to make things go as she desires. And as a result of that, she probably though— It would be fine if we just got married in real life too."

Err… eh? What do you mean?

"To put it simply, if she were to get married to Rusian in real life, then everything would be resolved— is what it means. From Ako-kun's point of view, as long as she can manage to get you two married, then everything would be fine. If you were married in both real life and the game, then no matter what Rusian says, there would be no problem."

"Wooow… Now that you say it, she's taking a very clever and realistic approach, isn't she?"

"Now that I realize, it seems like I've been dancing around the palm of her hand all this time…"

I've already been introduced to her mother, which was one of her requests from before. And recently, I've been feeling like I have to take responsibility for her as well. This was so effective that it even made me want to confess.

"And even if we wanted to voice our opinion about this, we have no such leeway to do so. She's working hard towards fitting in her cla.s.s, and she's seriously attending her cla.s.ses. All this is done so that she may marry Rusian someday. And, in the process of making her dream come true, she's been going along with our wishes."

"What should I do about this?"

"What to do you say… what can we do anyway?"

Why are you looking at me?

Why do we have to worry about this absurdity anyway? Isn't this strange?

"Why don't you just man up and marry her?"

"Even I don't think I can support all of Ako's needs right now you know!"

That's way too heavy of a responsibility you're talking about here!

I just want us to start with being boyfriend and girlfriend first!

In the first place, I haven't even proposed to her in real life yet, so I won't accept us suddenly getting married like that!

"But if you would just show her your resolve, I'm sure she can be convinced of her position as your fiance though?"

"It's impossible! That's just impossible for me! I haven't even begun thinking about marriage in real life yet!"

I shouted as I grasped my head yet again.

"The game and reality are different. There's proper steps we have to take before telling me to get married in real life you know? I can't be convinced otherwise. We should first start out as lovers and go on from there."

"Why are you even telling us this? Ako's the one you have to convince right?"

"That— is— impossible—!"

"…Just give it up and accept life's graveyard."

"I— don't— wanna—!"

Isn't it strange that we're talking about this before I've gotten a proper confession going?

"Well, that's not our only problem anyway, since the grounds of Rusian's anxiety won't be resolved like this either."

"…By that you mean?"

"Putting stuff in the game aside, the question of whether their feelings in reality are mutual or not is still up in the air."

Ah—, that's true. Haha, hahahahaha.

"…Guess I'll die after all—"

"I told you to stop that!"

"Isn't this a good thing though? Ponder over it a little more Rusian."

Master seemed to be in a good mood as she laughed.

"Remember, it was in-game that Ako proposed to Rusian. However, to Ako-kun, the things you are worrying about right now are things she have mulled over by herself a long time ago. Her resolve has been steeled ever since then. So Rusian, make sure you give your best thinking about this as well."

"That's right. That girl has been rejected so many times yet she still pushed forward. So, you better do your best as well!"

True, I've turned down her proposal numerous times. I didn't want anything to do with marriages in-game after all anymore. And I didn't think of Ako as a girl back then.

But from Ako's point of view, she mustered an even greater courage than the one I had to when I confessed to her. To her, it was her real proposal.

When I think about it like that, I just can't give up here, can I?

"…I think I'll bear with this for a little longer."

"You go do that."

If I can have my heart torn asunder by something like this, my wife would laugh at me.

Alright, I'll keep confessing as many times as it takes as well!

"Well there you have it."

"Indeed. Let's meet up again in LA."

"Wait."

I firmly caught Segawa's hand, who looked like she was in a hurry to get home.

"You have this look like everything's settled and it's fine to go home, but we're not done here at all."

"E, err, is there something else we left out?"

There is, there is! More like, not a single thing was resolved by our whole talk earlier.

"In the end, what am I going to do about Ako? That girl, her thinking is still not fixed at all! At least help me think about how I can confess my feelings to her."

"I've already done all I can though… Hey now, stop looking at me with that desperate look on your face."

Segawa had this troubled look on her face as if to say, 'I'm not here to bully you, you know?'.

But, I mean, if I let these two go home now, I'll have totally no plan for when I try confessing again!

I just can't envision what to do myself to make it a success!

"Leave it to me, I have a plan."

"Ooh! Seriously?"

As expected of Master! She's really dependable!

"But of course, I'll have you two help me on that. Are we clear?"

Master grinned and burst into an evil sounding laughter.

That night, we met up at the same tavern in LA as always.

Ako: Rusian! Aren't you pretty late?

Ako, who seemed like her usual self, called out to me, who was currently losing my nerves.

Rusian: …Good evening.

Ako: Yup, good evening. …What's the matter? Why are you acting like a total stranger?

'Aren't we a family?', is what Ako shyly followed up to that.

T, that's right. We're husband and wife after all, yeah…

Schwein: Even my bad self can't help but feel sorry for Rusian.

Apricot: Rusian, I…

Even though I'm talking to my wife, I have no idea on how to approach her.

Ako: Now, now, those h.e.l.lish tests are over! Let's go farm! Let's go play! I'm going all out!

Rusian: Y, yeah.

Schwein: Literally worse than Hitler.

TL note: This is a reference to the phrase まさに外道 where it means 'it's literally Gedo' (they were talking about Gedo but the statement can also mean 'that fiend'). Of all the stuff I've seen, this particular one seems to fit as a swap for English.

In response to Ako's energetic self, we all had our moods dampened.

Suddenly, Master stood in front of us and said the following in chat in large characters.

Apricot: Before we proceed with that, I have an announcement to make. The plan for our summer camp has been officially decided!

With a 'Dodon!' she unveiled the plan.

Apricot: Like I've mentioned earlier today, the camp will take place on the first weekend of summer vacation. We'll be meeting in front of Maegasaki station at 6 AM on Friday. I'll send the specifics on what luggage you'll need to bring through mail, so make sure you double-check on it.

As she said that, I received a notice of having received mail.

The things we have to bring are: clothes for a two-night stay, an unwavering spirit to play, and our love for netgames.

Swimsuits were obviously also included there, but I'll still have to buy one.

Other than that, there's no particularly important items we need to bring. Estimated budget required is 3000 yen.

Schwein: 3000 yen huh… Nugugu, that's going to be a bit tough to get.

Apricot: I don't mind paying for everyone though. With that, I hope no one has any other reservations about this plan?

I feel like spending only 3000 yen for a 3 days 2 nights trip alone is already placing most of the burden on Master though.

Though I'm fine with that. If she tells us not to worry about it, then I'll just take her up on her offer.

Apricot: Well then, as for what this camp entails, that will be the main focus for tonight. Listen well and listen good. For this camp— connecting to the internet is prohibited, a net-free summer camp! I call it: 'The 24-Hour No Internet Connection Camp'!

Ako: Eeeeeeeh?

Ako typed that out in chat in her surprise.

As for why it turned out like this, well, let's turn the dial back a little earlier.

"Haa, a ban on the internet huh?"

"Indeed."

What Master said before ending the Pity Party (Temp Name) was, the explanation regarding this no internet connection camp.

"Isn't Ako already thinking that they're a full blown couple in real life? What good is separating her from the internet for a bit going to do?"

"It isn't as simple as you think."

Master replied with full confidence to Segawa's calm remark.

"She too is no different from that of a plain girl in a love. With that in mind, she's probably yearning for a normal romance as well. If that's the case, then we too shall celebrate our youth in bonafide normie fas.h.i.+on, and amidst all that, we will create the perfect situation for you to confess. And if we succeed, this should enough to mellow out even Ako."

The inner workings of her mind are completely like that of a villain. It's no good trying to fool people you know?

"In the first place, just what do you even mean by the perfect situation for confessing? Is it while watching sun set in the horizon? Or maybe while gazing at the starry night sky?"

"All the possible situations are already laid out. Everything now depends on Rusian."

"That's quite the heavy responsibility…"

"We're talking about your love life here so isn't that a given?"

It is as you say. I'm sorry.

But even so… net-free, huh? I wonder if that won't be too boring for a group like ours?

But well, I guess it's not bad to do stuff a normal high schooler does once in a while.

"Confessing like a normal highschool student and then getting a normal yes, alright…"

"Shall we give it a try then?"

"Then it's decided!"

And that's the gist of what happened.

Ako: Net-free you say… Uhm… What about cellphones…?

Apricot: If anyone is seen messing with their phones, that calls for a penalty game.

Rusian: Ako, out!

Ako: Hiiii! I don't want that kind of baseball b.u.t.t!

TL note: ケツバット (the reference for this joke) is a penalty game where you get hit on the b.u.t.t with a bat.

Ako ran away from me.

It's fine. It's not like we've decided on what the penalty game will be already.

Apricot: Listen well, when playing net games, the last thing you always rely on is your stamina. When it comes to boss battles, prolonged fights that require intense concentration, and hunting for materials for your crafts, they all boil down to one thing: your stamina. And for that reason, the Modern Electronic Communications Game Club's camp is going to be outdoors. Make sure to steel yourselves for what's to come.

Ako: Uhm… can we be excused for having poor health?

Schwein: When we get back, my bad self will be talking with everyone about our fun summer memories while you sit in the corner and listen. Think carefully if you're fine with doing just that.

Ako: Fueeeee, I'll goooooooo!

Alright, Ako's partic.i.p.ation is decided.

Just like this, the Modern Electronic Communications Game Club's '24-Hour No Internet Connection Camp' is now well under way.

Netoge no Yome wa Onnanoko ja Nai to Omotta? Volume 3 Chapter 2 Part1

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Netoge no Yome wa Onnanoko ja Nai to Omotta? Volume 3 Chapter 2 Part1 summary

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