The Rolliad Part 39

[1] George Nugent Grenville, Marquis of Buckingham.

[2] The immaculate continence of the BRITISH SCIPIO, so strongly insisted on by his friends, as const.i.tuting one of the most s.h.i.+ning ingredients of his own uncommon character, is only alluded to here as a received fact, and not by any means as a reproach.

[3] _Wedded_. This Gentleman's own term for a Coalition.

EPIGRAMS,

_By_ SIR CECIL WRAY.

First published in the Gentleman's Magazine, under the signatures of DAMON, PHILOMELA, NOLENS VOLENS, and CRITANDER.

_To_ CELIA (_now Lady_ WRAY), _on Powdering her Hair._

EXTEMPORE.

Thy locks, I trow, fair maid, Don't never want this aid: Wherefore thy powder spare, And only _comb_ thy hair.

_To Sir_ JOSEPH MAWBEY, _proposing a Party to go a-fis.h.i.+ng for White Bait._

Worthy SIR JOE, we all are wis.h.i.+ng, You'd come with us a-White-Bait-fis.h.i.+ng.

_On seeing a Ladybird fly off_ CELIA'_s Neck, after having perched on it for many minutes._

I thought (G.o.d bless my soul!) Yon ladybird her mole-- I thought--but devil take the thing, It proved my error--took to wing--

_A Thought on_ NEW MILK.

Oh! how charming is New Milk!

Sweet as sugar--soft as silk!

_Familiar Verses, addressed to two Young Gentlemen at the_ Hounslow Academy.

Take notice, roguelings, I prohibit Your walking underneath yon gibbet: Have you not heard, my little ones, Of _Raw Head and b.l.o.o.d.y Bones?_ How do you know, but that there fellow, May step down quick, and you up swallow?

EXTEMPORE.

_To_ DELIA, _on seeing_ TWO CATS _playing together._

See, DELY, DELY, charming fair, How p.u.s.s.eys play upon that chair; Then, DELY, change thy name to WRAY, And thou and I will likewise play.

_On a_ BLADE-BONE.

Says I, one day, unto my wife, I never saw in all my life Such a blade-bone. Why so, my dear?

Says she. The matter's very clear, Says I; for on it there's no meat, For any body for to eat.

Indeed, my dear, says she, 'tis true, } But wonder not, for, you know, you } Can't eat your cake and have it too. }

_An_ IDEA _on a_ PECK _of_ COALS.

I buy my coals by pecks, that we May have them fresh and fresh, d'ye see.

_To my very learned and facetious friend_, S. ESTWICK, ESQ.

M.P. _and_ LL.D. _on his saying to me_, "What the D---l noise was that?"

Good Dr. ESTWICK, you do seek To know what makes my shoe-soles creak?

They make a noise when they are dry; And so do you, and so do I.

C. W.

LORD GRAHAM'S DIARY,

DURING THE FIRST WEEK OF THE NEW PARLIAMENT.

_May_ 20. Went down to the House--sworn in--odd faces--asked PEARSON who the new people were--he seemed cross at my asking him, and did not know--I took occasion to inspect the water-closets.

N.B. To tell ROSE, that I found three c.o.c.ks out of repair--didn't know what to do--left my name at the DUKE OF QUEENSBERRY's--dined at WHITE's--the pease tough--Lord APSLEY thought they ought to be boiled in steam--VILLIERS very _warm_ in favour of _hot water_--PITT for the new mode--and much talk of _taking the sense_ of the _club_--but happily I prevented matters going to extremity.

_May_ 21. Bought a tooth-pick-case, and attended at the Treasury-Board--nothing at the House but swearing--rode to WILBERFORCE's at WIMBLEDON--PITT, THURLOW, and DUNDAS, _water-sucky_--we all wondered why perch have such large mouths, and WILBERFORCE said they were like MULGRAVE's--red champagne rather ropy--away at eight--THURLOW's horse started at a windmill--he off.

N.B. To bring in an Act to encourage water-mills--THURLOW home in a _dilly_--we after his horse--children crying, _Fox for ever!_--DUNDAS stretching to whip them--he off too.

_May_ 22. Sick all day--lay a bed--VILLIERS _bored_ me.

23. Hyde-park--PITT--HAMILTON, &c. Most of us agreed it was right to bow to Lord DELAVAL--PITT won't to any one, except the _new Peers_--dined at PITT's--PITT's soup never salt enough--Why must PRETTYMAN dine with us?--PITT says to-day he will _not_ support Sir CECIL WRAY--THURLOW wanted to give the _old toast_--PITT grave--probably this is the reason for letting PRETTYMAN stay.

24. House--Westminster Election--we settled to always make a noise when BURKE gets up--we ballotted among ourselves for a _sleeping Committee_ in the Gallery----STEELE always to call us when PITT speaks--Lord DELAVAL our _dear_ friend!--_Private_ message from ST.

JAMES's to PITT--He at last agrees to support SIR CECIL.

_May_ 25. BANKES won't vote with us against GRENVILLE's Bill--English obstinacy--the Duke of RICHMOND teazes us--nonsense about consistency--what right has _he_ to talk of _it?_--but must not say so.--DUNDAS thinks worse of the Westminster business than--but too hearty to indulge absurd scruples.

26. Court--King in high spirits, and attentive rather to the Duke of GRAFTON--QUEEN more so to Lord CAMDEN--puzzles us all!--So it is possible the Duke of RICHMOND will consent to leave the _Cabinet_?--Dinner at DUNDAS's--too many things aukwardly served--Joke about ROSE's thick legs, like ROBINSON's, in flannel.

EXTRACTS

FROM THE SECOND VOLUME OF LORD MULGRAVE'S ESSAYS ON ELOQUENCE, LATELY PUBLISHED.

"We now come to speak of _Tropes_. Trope comes from the Greek word _Trepo_, to turn. I believe that tropes can only exist in a vocal language, for I do not recollect to have met with any among the savages near the Pole, who converse only by signs; or if they used any, I did not understand them. Aristotle is of opinion that horses have not the use of tropes.--Dean Swift seems to be of a contrary opinion; but be this as it may, tropes are of very great importance in Parliament, and I cannot enough recommend them to my young readers.

"_Tropes_ are of two kinds: 1st, such as tend to ill.u.s.trate our meaning; and 2dly, such as tend to render it obscure. The first are of great use in the _sermo pedestris_; the second in the sublime. They give the _os magna sonans_; or, as the same poet says in another place, the _ore rotundo_; an expression, which shows, by the bye, that it is as necessary to round your mouth, as to round your periods.--But of this more hereafter, when I come to treat of _mouthing_, or, as the Latins call it, _elocutio_.