The Star-Gazers Part 63

"Ah, then your neighbour sat up with you last night, did she?" said Oldroyd.

"Sat up with me? Snored up with me, and nearly drove me wild, my aggynies was that bad. Then she goes and sends Judy to tidy me up after braxfas, and a nice tidying up it was, with her all agog to get away and meet someone I'll be bound. I dunno who it be, but she's allus courting somers in the wood. Ah, I went courting once, but now it's all aggynies."

"And so you're in great pain, are you, Mrs Wattley?"

"Aggynies I tellee, aggynies."

"Ah, it's rheumatism, old lady, rheumatism."

"There man, as if I didn't know that. Think I've had these aggynies a-coming on at every change of the wind, and not know as it's rheumatiz, why, as I says to Miss Lucy Alling, there, as comes over from the big house a'side the common yonder, and brought me a few bits o' chicking, and sits herself down in that very chair, 'I've had 'em too many years now, my dear, not to know as they're rheumatiz. I'll ask Doctor Oldroyd,' I says, 'to give me some of they old iles as used to be got when I was younger than I am.' Fine things they was for the rheumatiz, but they don't seem to be able to get 'em now."

Oldroyd moved uneasily in his seat, as he learned how lately Lucy had been there, and that she had occupied the very chair he was in. Then he hastily proceeded to cross-examine the poor old woman about her troubles, every answer he received going to prove that, for an old lady over ninety, Mrs Wattley was about as well preserved and healthy a specimen of humanity as it would be possible to find.

"Ah, well," said Oldroyd at last, "I daresay I shall be able to give you a little comfort. You'll have to take some medicine, though."

"Nay, nay, I want the iles, and I want 'em rubbed in," cried the old lady. "Nothing ever did me so much good as they iles; and I know what it all means--waiting three or four days afore I gets the medson to take."

"Now, what is this," said Oldroyd, smiling; "I have brought it with me."

As he spoke he took a bottle from the breast of his coat.

"Then it's pyson, and you're going to give it to get rid of me, just a cause you parish doctors won't take the trouble to attend poor people.

I know; you want to get rid of me, you do."

"How can you talk like that? Have I ever neglected you?"

"Well, p'r'aps not so much as him as was here afore you did. He neglecket me shameful. But you've got tired of me, and you want to see me put under ground."

"What makes you say that?" said Oldroyd, laughing.

"'Cause you want me to take that physic as isn't proper for me."

"Why you comical, prejudiced old woman," he said, "it is the best thing I can give you."

"Oh, no, it isn't. I know better," cried the old lady. "Don't tell me.

I may be ninety, but I a'n't lived to ninety without knowing as one physic a'n't good for everything."

"Oh, that's it, is it?" cried Oldroyd, laughing. "You think I haven't got the right stuff for you."

"Ah, it's nothing to laugh at, young man. I'm not a fool. How could you know what was the matter with me before you come, and so bring the stuff? I a'n't a cow, as only wants one kind of physic all its life."

"Nay, I did know what was the matter with you," cried Oldroyd, taking the poor, prejudiced old things hand, to speak kindly and seriously though with a little politic flattery. "The boy came to me and said you were ill, and I immediately, knowing you as I do, said to myself--now with such a const.i.tution as Mrs Wattley has, there can only be one of two things the matter with her; someone has carelessly left a door or window open, and given her cold; or else she has got a touch of rheumatism."

"And so you brought physic for a cold," said the old woman sharply.

"No. I knew you would be too careful to let anyone neglect your doors and windows."

"That I would," cried the old lady. "I fetched that Judy back with a flea in her ear only the day afore yesterday. I shouted till she came back and shut my door after her--a s.l.u.t. She thinks of nothing but young men."

"You see I was right," continued Oldroyd. "I felt sure it was not cold, and, on looking out, saw that the wind had got round to the east, so I mixed up his prescription, the best thing there is for rheumatism, and came on at once."

"Is it as good as the iles, young man?"

"Far better; and I'm sure you will find relief."

"Well, you are right about the wind, for I felt it in my bones as soon as it got round; so, p'r'aps you're right about the physic. I dunno, though, you're only a boy, and not likely to know much. It's a pity they send such young fellows as you to take charge of a parish. But the guardians don't care a bit. They'd like to see all the old uns go under, the sooner the better. Not as I'm beholden to 'em for aught but a drop o' physic. I can do without 'em, I daresay, for a good many years yet."

"To be sure you can," said Oldroyd, smiling rather gravely, as he looked at the ancient face before him.

"Ay, I can do without 'em; and now, look here, young man, you set me right again. I've got four s.h.i.+llings put aside, and I'll give you that."

"I daresay I can set you right again without the four s.h.i.+llings," said Oldroyd, "but not if you begin by calling me a boy."

"There's naught to be ashamed of in being a boy," cried the old woman sharply. "I wish I was a gal now, and could begin all over again."

"No, there's nothing to be ashamed of, old lady, but you must trust me, and take my medicine."

"I won't--I won't swallow a drop, if you don't take your oath it's quite right, and will do me good, and won't pyson me."

For answer Oldroyd rose from his seat, and took a cup from a shelf, into which he poured a portion of the medicine.

"There, it's no use, young man, I won't take a dose."

"Look here," cried Oldroyd; and putting the cup to his lips, he swallowed all that was at the bottom.

"You're going to spit it out again as soon as you get outside."

"Nonsense!" cried Oldroyd, laughing heartily as he poured out a fresh portion. "There, there, take it, and get well again."

"You're sure it's right, and that it won't hurt me?"

"I'm sure it will comfort you, and correct what is wrong."

She watched him with her bright old eyes full of suspicion, and ended by taking the cup very doubtfully and swallowing its contents with a childlike shudder.

"There, give me a bit of sugar out of that basin, young man," she cried emphatically; and, upon her desire being gratified, she settled herself down again in bed with a satisfied sigh.

"Ah, I feel better now," she said. "I suppose you are not quite so young as you look, are you?"

"Really, Mrs Wattley, I don't know," replied Oldroyd, smiling.

"Perhaps you ar'n't," she continued looking at him critically. "I daresay you're clever enough, or else you wouldn't be here; but we ladies don't like to have a single man to see us when we are ill. You ought to be married, you know."

"Do you think so?" said Oldroyd, looking rather conscious, as he thought of his prospects, matrimonially and financially.

"Yes, I do think so," said the old lady tartly, and in a very dictatorial manner. "Look here, young man, there's little Miss Lucy, who comes to see me now and then. Marry her, and if you behave yourself, perhaps I'll leave you my cottage and ground. I sha'n't leave 'em to Judy, for she don't deserve 'em a bit."

"Leave them to your relatives, old lady; and suppose we turn back to the rheumatism," said Oldroyd, half-amused and half-annoyed by his patient's remarks.