Cornelli Part 8
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"I did not do it," said Cornelli with sparkling eyes.
"Who in all the house would have done it except you? Please ask yourself that, Cornelli! There is no question about it at all," said Miss Dorner.
"It is probably one of your little jokes similar to throwing your dresses out of the window. I know all about it. Just let me tell you this! It is the last time that you, a girl of ten years old, will show such a terrible lack of manners. As long as I am here, you shall not do it any more. You really should spare your good, sensitive father such behavior."
"I have not done it. No, I did not do it, no, no!" Cornelli cried aloud.
"But Cornelli, only reflect! You are blus.h.i.+ng and your conscience is giving you away," Miss Grideelen here remarked. "It would be so much better for you to say humbly: 'I have done it and I am sorry; I shall never do it again!'"
"No, no! I have not done it. No, no!" Cornelli cried out louder still.
Her cheeks were glowing red from anger and excitement.
"Do not make such a noise," ordered the cousin. "One might think there was an accident. It is not worth while to lose so many words. You should not have made things worse by denying it; if you had not, everything would be all settled. You have misbehaved and you shall not do so any more. Remember!"
"No, I did not misbehave. No, no! And I shall not say yes when it is not true," Cornelli now cried, quite beside herself.
"Go to your room, Cornelli, and smooth out your forehead before you come to dinner. Your little horns are protruding quite plainly when you act that way. Just look at yourself in the mirror and see yourself how repulsive you look. If you think that there is anybody in the world who can still like you when you have black horns on your forehead, you are mistaken. Go, now, and return with another face."
Cornelli went.
Reaching her room, Cornelli put her hand up to her brow. Right on her forehead were two protruding points. Should horns be really growing there? The child had a sudden horrible fright at this thought. She was sure that everybody could see them already, for she could feel them quite distinctly. She could not stand it any longer, so she ran away to old Martha.
"No, I did not do it, Martha. I never did it," she called out, running into the little room. "When I tell them no, no, they ought to believe that I did not do it. I never, never did it. They shall know it! But they won't believe me even if I say it a hundred times and--"
"Stop a little, Cornelli!" said old Martha kindly. "You see, you are all out of breath. Sit down here on your stool and tell me quietly what has excited you so. You know that I believe your words. I have known you since you were small, and I know that what you say is true."
It was impossible for Cornelli to speak calmly about what had happened, but it soothed her, nevertheless, to be able to pour out her heart and to know that Martha believed her. She told of the accusation which had been brought against her, and how she had not been believed despite all her a.s.surances. She was certain that both ladies would always believe for ever and ever that she had done it and had denied it. At this thought Cornelli again became quite red from excitement and was on the point of breaking out again. But Martha put her hand on the child's shoulder, quietly restraining her.
"No, no, Cornelli, that's enough," she said soothingly. "It is only to your advantage that it is so and not as they have said. You have been accused wrongly and cannot prove it, but G.o.d knows the truth. He has heard everything. You can be calm and happy and look up to Him with a clear conscience. You can say to yourself: 'G.o.d knows it, and I do not need to be afraid or frightened.' If you had really done wrong and had denied it, you would have to be afraid that the truth would be revealed. Then you could not look up calmly to the sky, for you would be frightened at the thought that up there was One who knew everything and from whom nothing could be hidden. A wrong accusation does not stay with us forever. Even if it takes ever so long, it generally is revealed in the end, and you certainly will not need to bear it in all eternity, because G.o.d already knows how it is."
Cornelli had really grown calm at the thought that there was One who knew how it all was. When her trouble began to weigh upon her, she could always say: "You know it all, dear Father in Heaven, You have seen and heard everything."
"If He could only tell them! They would then know it, too. G.o.d could easily do that," Cornelli said.
"Yes, but that is not the way things happen. We do not know better than He what is good for us," Martha said, shaking her head quite seriously. "If we could rule, everything would come wrong. We never can see ahead of the hour and we never know what is good for us because the next moment always brings something we did not know about. Otherwise we would always be trying to undo what we have strained to do the day before; we should only make ourselves miserable over and over again.
But if G.o.d ordains anything that we do not understand, we must believe firmly that something good will come out of it. We must be patient, and if our troubles are too heavy, we must console ourselves and think: G.o.d knows what good will come from it. But we are forgetting the time, Cornelli. You must hurry home to your dinner, now. I am afraid it is already late."
Cornelli's black frown had disappeared during Martha's soothing speech, but now a deep shadow flew across her face.
"Oh, Martha, if I only did not need to go home any more! I hate to go back and sit at table. I would not mind dying of hunger, if I could only stay here with you."
Cornelli, glancing at her home, drew together her brows as if she saw something frightful there.
"But, child, you must not say such things about your lovely home; it is wrong to do that," said Martha, kindly admonis.h.i.+ng her. "Just think how many children have no home at all. How grateful they would be to G.o.d for a home like yours. Go, now, Cornelli, be grateful for all G.o.d has given you and chase away the thoughts that make you sad. Come soon again and we shall be glad together, for there is always something to be glad about."
Cornelli went. While she had been with Martha and had heard her words, it had really seemed to her that there was no cause for grief. As soon, however, as she entered the garden and saw the windows of the room where they were surely already at table, everything that had pressed heavily on her heart rose again. After all, Martha did not know everything.
Cornelli was sure that she could never be happy any more. She could not go in there and she could not eat. She felt as if she could not swallow anything, for big stones seemed to stick in her throat. If she would only die from it all! Cornelli thought that that would be best, for then everything would be over. So she sat down on the lawn behind the thick currant bushes, where she could not be seen from the house.
Meanwhile, Miss Mina had carried away the sweets and was putting the fruit course on the table.
"It seems to me that Cornelli does not care if she comes to table a whole hour late," said Miss Dorner. "Nothing is to be kept warm for her, for she does not seem to have learned yet how to respect time and order. She had better learn it soon."
Mina went out to sit down for her dinner. Esther had everything ready and was just putting the dessert in the cupboard.
"That is for Cornelli as soon as she comes home," she said, sitting down, too; "the poor child gets enough bitter things to swallow nowadays."
"But why shouldn't she come in time?" asked Mina crossly. "Besides, she couldn't possibly eat the whole dessert. We can take our share and there will be enough left, surely as much as is good for her."
"I won't let you have it," said Esther, firmly pressing her arm to the table as a sign that she would stay there. "The child must have something that will help her to swallow all the cross words she hears all day," she continued. "What was wrong again this morning, when there was such a scene in the living room?"
"It was nothing," replied Mina. "There were a few marks of dust on the sofa, and the ladies thought that Cornelli had been standing on it.
The child would not admit it and so the ladies kept on accusing her till Cornelli set up a senseless row."
"I really think, Miss Mina, that you could have given an explanation,"
said Esther with a sly smile. "If one has to wind up the clock, it is quicker to jump up on the sofa than to push the heavy thing away. When one wears tight lace boots in the early morning, one can't take them off easily, eh, Miss Mina?" With these words Esther glanced at the neat little boots that Mina was stretching out comfortably under the table.
"Well, what was there so terrible about that?" retorted Mina pertly.
"The sofa won't be spoiled on account of that, and besides, I have to clean it myself."
"I only think you could have said a word, before the ladies accused the child of having lied to them and before she nearly had a fit over the injustice. She made such a noise that one could hear it all over the house! It went right through me."
"Oh, pooh! it was not as bad as that," a.s.serted Mina; "the child has long since forgotten the whole thing. That is the way with children.
One moment they make a horrible noise and the next they go out of the door and forget about it. Why should one bother?"
"It used to be different," said Esther smilingly, "Miss Mina could not be obliging enough to the child then. Things are all done for other people now and not for those of the house."
"Those of the house!" repeated Mina mockingly. "It won't be long before you, too, will be singing another tune. When the new lady of the house gives orders in the kitchen you will have to obey, too."
Esther dropped her spoon. "For goodness sake, what are you saying?"
she exclaimed. "Who should have thought of such a thing? Whom do you mean, the cousin or the other one?"
"Well, I can't tell that exactly," replied the maid. "Our master has not discussed that with me, but one must be dumb not to see what is going on and why the ladies came here. After all, one wants to know what one is going to do. That two have come, is the surest sign of all, for we shall be supposed not to suspect."
"For goodness sake," said Esther again, "what a discovery! I am sure it must be the relation, for she already rules the house. I tell you one thing, though, Miss Mina, that I shall keep on singing the same tune I have been singing for the last twelve years in this house, and I don't care who is going to rule. You can believe me."
"Oh, we shall see about that, Esther," said Mina with a superior air.
She got up, now, to see if the ladies needed anything.
Waking up from a sound sleep, Cornelli did not remember where she was.
She was lying on the lawn behind the currant bushes. She remembered at last how she had come back at lunch time from Martha's cottage and how she had suddenly felt weary and sleepy. She must have dropped down and gone to sleep.
It was evening and there was no more suns.h.i.+ne on the gra.s.s, but the sky was still light, although it was beginning to grow dark. Cornelli suddenly had a longing she had never known before. She felt as if she had to eat and taste everything about her, the bushes and the leaves, the flowers, and especially the unripe plums on the tree above her.
Oh, if she only had a piece of bread! Cornelli got up quickly and ran towards the house.
"Come quickly, Cornelli," Esther called to her through the open kitchen window; "they are just sitting down to supper; you have come just in time."
Cornelli flew to her room and, pulling out a thick shawl from among her things, tied it around her head. Then, running to the dining room, she sat down at her accustomed seat.
"So you have come again," said Miss Dorner, who had just settled down, too. "A well brought up child should at least say good evening when she enters the room after a long absence."
Cornelli Part 8
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Cornelli Part 8 summary
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