Tribute Part 9

She narrowed her eyes. "Pull up your s.h.i.+rt."

"I thought you'd never ask."

"Keep your pants on. Just the s.h.i.+rt, Ford. I want to check out the abs."

"You're a strange woman, Cilla." But he pulled up his s.h.i.+rt.

She poked a finger into his stomach. "Okay. I just wanted to be sure you actually use this equipment, and the mood striking is a side benefit rather than a purpose."

"I've got a purpose when it comes to you."

"Which I get, and which is fine. But I'd really like to take you up on your offer and do that without strings or expectations. I appreciate the hospitality, Ford. I really do. Plus you have Matt's seal of approval, and I like him."

"It's a good thing because I pay him five hundred a year for that seal."

"He loves you. It came across when I subtly and cleverly pumped him about you."

He felt a quick and happy twinge. "You pumped him about me?"

"Subtly," she repeated. "And cleverly. And he's a nice guy, so ..." She scanned the room, the equipment again, and he could almost feel her longing. "How about we barter? I'll happily take advantage of your equipment, and if you have something around the house that needs fixing or dealing with, I'll take care of it."

"You're going to be my handyman?"

"I'm pretty d.a.m.n handy."

"Will you wear your tool belt, and a really short skirt?"

"Tool belt, yes. Skirt, no."

"d.a.m.n it."

"If I can't fix it, I'll send one of the guys over. Maybe one of them will wear a really short skirt."

"I can always hope."

"Deal?"

"Deal."

"Great." Smiling, she studied the room again. "I'm going to take advantage first thing tomorrow. Why don't I take you out to dinner to seal the deal?"

"I'll rain-check that as I've got the menu planned up in Chez Sawyer."

"You're going to cook."

"My specialty." He took her arm to turn her toward the steps. "I only have the one that doesn't involve nuking. It involves tossing a couple steaks on the grill, stabbing a bunch of peppers on a skewer and baking a couple of potatoes. How do you like your steak?"

"So I can hear it faintly whisper moo."

"Cilla, you're a woman after my own heart."

SHE WASN'T. She wasn't after anything but the pursuit of her own goals, and the satisfaction of finding them. But she had to admit, Ford made it tempting. He engaged her mind, putting it at ease and keeping it on alert. It was, Cilla thought, a clever skill. She enjoyed his company, more than she felt was altogether wise, particularly since she'd planned to spend more of her time alone.

And he looked d.a.m.n good standing over a smoking grill.

They ate on his back veranda, with the well-fed Spock snoring in table-sc.r.a.p bliss. And she found the down-to-basics meal exactly right. "G.o.d, it's so beautiful here. Peaceful."

"No urges for club crawls or a quick foray down Rodeo Drive?"

"I had my fill of both a long time ago. Seems like fun at the time, but it goes sour fast if it's not really your place. It wasn't mine. What about you? You lived in New York for a while, didn't you? No urges to take another bite out of the Big Apple?"

"It was exciting, and I like going back now and then, soaking up that energy. The thing was, I thought I was supposed to live there, given what I wanted to do. After a while, I realized I was doing more work when I came down to visit my parents for a few days, hang with friends, than I was in the same stretch of time up there. I finally figured out there were just too many people thinking up there, all hours of the day and night. And I thought better down here."

"That's funny," she replied.

"What is?"

"In an interview once, a reporter asked my grandmother why she bought this little farm in Virginia. She said she could hear her own thoughts here, and that they tended to get drowned out with everyone else's when she was in L.A."

"I know exactly what she meant. Have you read many of her interviews? "

"Read, reread, listened to, watched. I can't remember a time she didn't fascinate me. This brilliant light, this tragic icon, who I came from. I couldn't escape her, so I needed to know her. I resented her when I was a kid. Being compared to her, and always falling short."

"Comparisons are designed to make someone fall short."

"They really are. By the time I was twelve or thirteen, they actively p.i.s.sed me off. So I started to study her, very purposefully, looking for the trick, the secret. What I found was a woman who was stupendously and naturally talented. Anyone compared to her would fall short. And realizing that, I didn't resent her anymore. It would be like resenting a diamond for sparkling."

"I grew up hearing about her, because she had the place here. Died here. My mother would play her records a lot. She went to a couple of parties at the farm," he added. "My mother."

"Did she?"

"Her claim to fame is kissing Janet Hardy's son, that would be your uncle. A little odd, isn't it, you and me sitting out here like this, and back years, my mother and your uncle made out in the shadows across the road. Might be odder still when I tell you my mama did some of the same with your daddy."

"Oh G.o.d." On a burst of laughter, Cilla picked up her wine, took a quick drink. "You're not making that up?"

"Pure truth. This would be, of course, before she settled on my father, and your father went out to Hollywood after your mother. Complicated business, now that I think about it."

"I'll say."

"And mortifying for me, when she told me. Which was with some glee, when I ended up in your father's cla.s.s in high school. The thought that my mother had locked lips with Mr. McGowan was d.a.m.n near traumatizing at the time." His eyes lit with humor. "Now, I like the synchronicity that my mother's son has locked lips with Mr. McGowan's daughter."

Circles, Cilla thought. She'd thought of circles when she'd come to rebuild her grandmother's farm. Now here was another circle linked to that. "They must've been so young," she said softly. "Johnnie was only eighteen when he died. It must've been horrible for Janet, for the parents of the other two boys-one dead, one paralyzed. She never got over it. You can see in every clip, every photo of her taken after that night, she was never the same."

"My mother used to use that accident as a kind of bogeyman when I got old enough to drive. You'd see Jimmy Hennessy around town from time to time in his wheelchair, and she never missed the opportunity to remind me of what could happen if I was careless enough to drink or get high, then get behind the wheel or into a car with someone who'd been using."

He shook his head, polished off his steak. "I still can't go to a bar and guiltlessly enjoy a single beer if I've got to drive myself home. Mothers sure can screw things up for you."

"Does he still live here? The boy-well, not a boy now-the one who survived the wreck?"

"He died last year. Or the year before. I'm not sure."

"I didn't hear about it."

"He lived at home his whole life. His parents looked after him. Rough."

"Yes. His father blamed Janet. Blamed her for bringing her Hollywood immorality here, for letting her son run wild, for buying him the fast car."

"There were two other boys in that car. n.o.body forced them into it," Ford pointed out. "n.o.body poured beer forcibly down their throats or pumped pot into their systems. They were young and stupid, all three of them. And they paid a terrible price for it."

"And she paid them. According to my mother-and her bitterness over it tells me it's true-Janet paid each of the families of those boys a considerable sum of money. Undisclosed amount, even to my mother. And again, according to the gospel of Dilly, Janet only kept the farm as a kind of monument to Johnnie, and tied it up in trusts for decades after her own death for the same reason. But I don't believe that."

"What do you believe?"

"I believe Janet kept it because she was happy here. Because she could hear her own thoughts here, even when those thoughts were dark and dreadful." She sighed, sat back. "Give me another gla.s.s of wine, will you, Ford? That'll make three, which is my absolute personal high-end limit."

"What happens after three?"

"I haven't gone over three in years, but if history holds, I go from relaxed, perhaps mildly and pleasantly buzzed, to drunk enough to have yet one or maybe two more. Then I'd be very drunk, jump you, and wake up tomorrow with a hangover and only blurred memories of our encounter."

"In that case, you're cut off after this." He poured the wine. "When we encounter, your memory's going to be crystal."

"I haven't decided on that yet, you know."

"That's okay, I have." He propped his chin on his fist, stared at her. "I can't get myself out of your eyes, Cilla. They keep pulling me in."

"Janet Hardy's eyes."

"No. Cilla McGowan's eyes."

She smiled, sipped her last gla.s.s of wine. "I was going to make up an excuse-or not even bother to make one up-about not coming tonight."

"Is that so?"

"That is so. Because you got bossy about my living arrangements."

"Defining 'bossy' as 'sensible.' Why did you come?"

"Buying the toilets put me in a really good mood. Seriously," she said when he choked out a laugh. "I've found my thing, Ford. After a long time looking."

"You found your thing in toilets."

It was her turn to laugh. "I found my thing in taking something broken down or neglected, or just a little tired, and making it s.h.i.+ne again. Making it better. And doing that's made me better. So because I was in a good mood, I walked across the road. I'm really glad I did."

"So am I."

SHE DIDN'T SEE him or Spock when she let herself in his home gym the next morning. Cilla plugged in her iPod and got down to business. She gave herself a solid hour, and at some point during it the dog strolled out into the backyard and lifted his leg a number of times. But there was still no sign or sound from Ford when she let herself out again, with one wistful glance at his hot tub.

No time for jets and indulgence, she told herself. But as Spock raced over, so obviously thrilled to see her, she spent a good ten minutes rubbing him while he gurgled and grunted in what seemed to be some form of communication. The workout, the silly dog, just the day itself put her in a fine mood as she jogged back across the road. She showered off the workout sweat, downed coffee and a blueberry yogurt. By the time she strapped on her tool belt, her crews and subs began to arrive.

It took time, every morning, but Cilla was happy to spend it. Talking, evaluating, brainstorming away problems.

"I'm going to expand the bathroom, Buddy," she told him, and, as she expected, he let out a windy sigh.

"The one I'm using now, not the one you've roughed in."

"That's something anyway."

"I've already talked to Matt," she said. "Come on up, and I'll show you what we're going to do."

He hemmed and he hawed, but that was expected, too. In fact, she'd come to look forward to it. "Now that we're putting my office upstairs instead of in this bedroom, I'm going to use this s.p.a.ce to make it a master suite. We'll be taking out this wall," she began.

He listened, he scratched, he shook his head. "Gonna cost you."

"Yes, I know. I'll draw it up in more detail later, but for now, here's the idea." She opened her notebook to the sketch she'd drawn with Matt. "We'll keep the old claw-foot tub, have it refurbished and set here. Floor pipes and drains. Double sinks here, and I'm thinking undermount."

"Guess you'll be putting a slab of granite or whatnot."

"No, zinc."

"Say, what?"

"Zinc countertop. And over here, I'm putting in a steam shower. Yes," she said before he could speak. "Hollywood ideas. Gla.s.s block here, to form the water closet. In the end, it's going to reflect and respect the architecture, pay homage to retro, and, Buddy, it will rock."

"You're the boss."

She grinned. "d.a.m.n straight."

The boss moved outside, to build her rail and pickets in the April suns.h.i.+ne.

When her father pulled in, Cilla had her sides run, and had worked up a fresh sweat.

"Doesn't that look nice," he commented.

"It's coming along."

He nodded toward the house, and the cacophony of construction noise. "Sounds like more's coming along inside."

"First-stage demo's done. I've changed some things, so we'll have more demo on the second floor later. But the inspector's coming tomorrow. " She lifted her hand, crossed her fingers. "To approve the rough plumbing and electric. Then we'll boogie."

"It's the talk of the town."

"I imagine so." She gestured toward the road. "Traffic's increased. People slow down, even stop, to look. I had a call from the local paper for an interview. I don't want pictures yet. Most people can't see what it's going to be while it's at this stage, so I gave the reporter a quick hit over the phone."

"When's it going to run?"

"Sunday. Lifestyle. Janet Hardy still has the switch." Cilla pushed back her cap to swipe the back of her hand over her forehead. "You knew her, Dad. Would she approve?"

"I think she loved this place. I think she'd be pleased you love it, too. And that you're putting your mark on it. Cilla, are you building that railing yourself?"