Cavanaugh Justice: Alone In The Dark Part 16

"No," he told her quietly.

She took her courage into both her hands. Anything worth having was worth fighting for, she'd once heard. And Brady was so worth having. "Do you really think this is something you need to get over?"

No, if he was lucky, he'd remember every single moment he'd spent with her forever. But that wasn't the point. "No, but you need me to get over it."

"Coltrane, get this through your head. I do not need anyone else doing my thinking for me, or deciding what's best for me."

Her fierce declaration left him unmoved. "Maybe in this case, you do."

"No," she replied firmly, quietly. So quietly she could hear her heart cracking. "I don't. But you obviously need some time." She rose from the table, picking up his empty cup and hers. Had King not been in her recovery area, she would have taken Brady over to her uncle's for breakfast and maybe that would have done the trick for him.

But then, if King hadn't been hurt, Brady might not have been here in the first place.

Patience sighed. She ran her hand through her hair. It was still damp from the shower they had taken together. That hadn't been his plan, of course. She'd jumped into the stall after he'd already gotten started showering. His growl of surprise had turned into a guttural sound of pleasure. The shower had taken him far longer than he'd antic.i.p.ated, but he'd told her he had no complaints on that account. He'd made her laugh when he'd said that for the first time in his life, his back felt as if it was completely clean.

Was that the first of many showers they'd take together?

Or was it the last?

She just didn't know. But she was determined that she wasn't about to appear needy if he decided to walk away. Pride had to come in someplace, even if it was a poor subst.i.tute for love.

Patience rose from the table. "Like you said, you need to get to work. And so do I."

Brady nodded as he got up. "I just want to say goodbye to King."

The door that led down to the clinic was already unlocked. They'd gone to check on King together first thing this morning. Well, second thing, she amended, remembering the shower.

The thought was accompanied by a bittersweet sensation. With effort, she pulled herself back from it. "I'll let you two have a moment alone."

Brady nodded. For the time being he preferred it that way.

The morning dragged by.

Patience felt conflicted and horribly vulnerable. For the first time in a very long time, she felt as if she had little control over her emotions. They felt as if they were all over the map and it took effort to keep them from spilling out.

d.a.m.n him, anyway.

She'd been ready to throw out all of her own rules of engagement, ready to open up her heart to him completely and this morning, at the table, he'd looked as if he was ready to shut the door on it all. She could literally feel him withdrawing from her.

He'd hardly said a word after looking in on King again. Just a mumbled goodbye and that he'd be by later to pick up his partner.

And that was it.

So maybe that was it, she thought sadly. He certainly didn't behave like a man who wanted to prolong a relations.h.i.+p. And if she didn't want it to be over, well, obviously she had no control over the situation.

She was going to have to make her peace with that.

Peace was coming at a very high price today. s.h.i.+rley had been talking almost nonstop all morning, the sound of her voice droning in the background like the overly long score to an uninteresting movie.

After a day that had been all but bursting at the seams yesterday, today the appointments were so spread out, it seemed as if the hours crawled by. She told herself she could use the rest, but right now, in her present state of mind, she wanted a day that was so busy she couldn't take two breaths together in succession.

It was on days like today that she usually took the time to catch up, but nothing was getting caught. Her brain had taken a holiday.

She was in the back office when she heard the bell jingling, announcing that someone had walked into the clinic. Good, she could use the distraction. Anything to silence her own thoughts and s.h.i.+rley's incessant talking.

Coming to the reception area, she saw Josh. Gonzo was nowhere around. Taking a deep breath, she forced a smile to her lips.

The serious expression on his face made her feel uneasy. "Hi. Where's your partner?"

"At the station." His tone was somber, his words measured, as if he didn't know how to deliver them. "Patience, Brady's been hurt."

This was it, this was what she'd always feared. Her head began to ache as she tried to sort her thoughts out.

"Oh, G.o.d. How bad?" Rounding the counter, she was at his side.

Josh didn't mince words. "Bad. He's at the hospital. He asked me to come get you."

He was asking for her? That didn't sound like Brady. This had to be bad. Her heart felt constricted within her chest.

"s.h.i.+rley." She tossed the name over her shoulder, not bothering to even look at the receptionist. "I'm going with Josh to the hospital to see Brady. If anyone comes in, either reschedule their appointment or, if it's urgent, send them to Dr. Johnson." As in the case of most doctors, she and the other vet covered each other's patients. "And look in on King for me."

"Will do," s.h.i.+rley promised, calling after her as Patience flew out of the clinic. "Call me as soon as you know anything," she begged. But Patience was already gone.

"All right, no kid gloves. Tell me everything. What happened to Brady?" Patience demanded as she got into Josh's car.

He took off the second she closed the door.

"Some guy went nuts at the gas station on Wayne and Murphy. Said the attendant was out to get him. He pulled a gun. Brady tried to disarm him. He'd just stopped there to fill up," Josh explained. "The gun went off during the struggle."

She thought of the story that Brady had told her about attempting to wrestle the gun from his father. That had had fatal results for his father.

Was it Brady's turn now?

Her blood ran cold even as she struggled to push the thought out of her head.

Brady had felt guilty all morning. He'd left things on a bad note with Patience. It wasn't as if he'd changed his mind about his underlying concern. He knew that staying in her life would probably only result in grief for her.

But contemplating not being part of it tore him apart. It had only been a few hours since he'd made up his mind not to see her again. He'd thought, after the first time, that he could walk away. Two days of that had him crumbling. He'd found himself thinking about her almost constantly. She was like a fever of the blood and he didn't know what to do about it. The only possible antidote to the way he felt was more of the same.

d.a.m.n, was this what love was, feeling as if someone was tearing you apart and disintegrating you into tiny, useless pieces? Did it mean struggling with an overwhelming desire to see them again, to be with them again even though there was only heartache at the end of the road?

He had no answers, only questions.

And a longing so huge that he felt it was going to eat him up alive.

He lasted four hours. By the beginning of the fifth, he found himself turning his vehicle toward the familiar path that led to the clinic. Even pretending that he was just going to see King felt like a flimsy lie. He couldn't fool himself. He was going to see her.

Squaring his shoulders, Brady walked into the clinic. For once it was completely empty. He heard off-key singing coming from the back.

"h.e.l.lo?" he called.

In response, s.h.i.+rley popped her head around the corner. Confusion descended over her face the moment she saw him, followed by a huge, relieved smile. s.h.i.+rley rushed around to the other side of the counter. "Should you be up and around?"

Obviously, Patience must have told her about the less-than-friendly encounter with the pit bull last night. He shrugged carelessly.

"Yes," he answered tersely. "Is the Doc around?"

"No, she went to see you."

Why would she leave her practice in the middle of the day? "When?"

s.h.i.+rley stopped to think, then glanced at the clock on the wall. "An hour ago."

There hadn't been any calls from dispatch, or on his cell. "Did she say where she was going?"

"The hospital." s.h.i.+rley looked at him wide-eyed, as if she was examining him for bullet holes. "That's where Josh said you were. He's the one who came to get her."

Brady stared at her, a very sick feeling suddenly spreading through his stomach.

Chapter 14.

Patience struggled to keep her imagination from running away with her. The inside of the car felt hot and stifling as she fought to get hold of herself. "How badly is Brady hurt?"

Josh spared her a look. An odd expression crossed his face. "That would upset you, wouldn't it? That he was badly hurt."

She stared at him. How could Josh even ask such a question? "Of course I'd be upset. I am upset." It was difficult to keep her voice from rising. "I'd be upset if anyone I knew would be badly hurt."

What was wrong with him? she wondered, irritated. Okay, he and Brady weren't exactly friends, but this was a fellow policeman Josh was talking about. There was supposed to be a bond between them, a loyalty that went beyond petty issues.

Stepping on the gas, Josh drove right through a light that was turning red. She saw his hands tighten on the wheel. Maybe Brady was dead and he was searching for a way to tell her.

Oh, dear G.o.d, don't let him be dead. Please don't let him be dead.

Josh slanted a look at her before focusing back on the flow of traffic. "But this is special, isn't it, Patience? You'd really be upset if Brady was hurt."

Something didn't feel right, and anxiety began to undulate through her.

"What do you mean, 'if'? Is Brady hurt or not?" she asked. Josh made no answer. They whizzed through traffic, switching from lane to lane. She braced her hand against the dashboard as he took a right corner. "Josh, what's going on here?"

She saw his face darken, his jaw clench. A malevolence hardened in his eyes as he turned toward her. "Don't take that high-handed tone with me, you little liar."

Patience stared at him, stunned. The word was a slap in the face. What the h.e.l.l was going on with him? He'd always been so easygoing, so charming. Had something happened on the job to make him crack?

"Liar?"

He snorted contemptuously. "What would you call it? You go on and on about your precious rules. Rules for this, rules for that," he mimicked her voice. "Rules for not getting involved with a policeman." The singsong tone stopped. Pure rage vibrated in his tone. "Those rules didn't stop you from getting involved with Coltrane, did they?"

She stiffened. How did he know? "What are you talking about? I'm not involved with Coltrane."

"Stop lying to me," he shouted. The veins along his neck bulged, his face turning a deep shade of red. "You think I don't know? That I'm stupid or something? Is that it? You think I don't know that you've been sleeping with him?"

The noises within the vehicle blended and faded into the background. She could hear the blood rus.h.i.+ng in her veins. "And how would you know that?"

He took another sharp turn. She struggled not to lean into him.

"Because I know everything there is to know about you, Patience. I know all about your family, about how your father mistreated your mother and that's why you're afraid to go out with a policeman. I know that you're wasting your time with someone like Coltrane when I'm the one who understands you. I'm the one who can love you the way you deserve to be loved." The cell phone rang in her purse. He glared at it accusingly. "Don't answer that."

Her heart raced. Josh was acting crazy. She needed to get away before his reckless driving killed them both.

"But it could be about a patient," she protested.

He knew better. "And it could be Coltrane, looking for you. Don't answer that!" It wasn't a warning but a threat. Josh put out his hand. "Give me your cell," he ordered.

Patience opened her purse. d.a.m.n it, why wasn't she one of those women who carried everything but the kitchen sink in her purse? If she had scissors, a screwdriver or even a sharpened pencil, she could have used it on him. But her purse was the very essences of barren. She had nothing there to use as a weapon. Taking out her phone, she placed it in his hand.

The sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach nauseated her. Josh was the one, not Walter. For one insane second, she'd even thought it might have been s.h.i.+rley wanting to make her think someone was interested in her so that her attention would be drawn away from Brady. But it was neither of them. It had been Josh all along.

"You sent the flowers, didn't you?" The words echoed within the car.

She saw his shoulders stiffen. He shot her an accusing look. "I would have sent you an ocean of roses if you'd just stopped lying and gone out with me." His face contoured into a sneer. "But you didn't even want to give me a chance. Just Coltrane."

"It's not like that."

"Isn't it?" he demanded hotly. "You didn't take him into your bed last night? Didn't shower with him this morning?"

The accusations, so on target, stole her breath away. She could feel the skin along her arms and neck puckering into gooseflesh. There was only one way he could have been so dead-on.

"You have the house bugged."

His sneer only deepened. "Only way to find out what you're up to."

Patience pressed her lips together. Her stomach rose up into her throat. She fought not to throw up.

And then it hit her. She was being kidnapped. "Brady isn't in the hospital, is he?"