The Eleven Comedies Vol 2 Part 93

HERMES. Do you forget, then, how I used to take care he knew nothing about it when you were stealing something from your master?

CARIO. Because I used to share it with you, you rogue; some cake or other always came your way.

HERMES. Which afterwards you ate up all by yourself.[804]

CARIO. But then you did not share the blows when I was caught.

HERMES. Forget past injuries, now you have taken Phyle.[805] Ah! how I should like to live with you! Take pity and receive me.

CARIO. You would leave the G.o.ds to stop here?

HERMES. One is much better off among you.

CARIO. What! you would desert! Do you think that is honest?

HERMES. "Where I live well, there is my country."[806]

CARIO. But how could we employ you here?

HERMES. Place me near the door; I am the watchman G.o.d and would s.h.i.+ft off the robbers.

CARIO. s.h.i.+ft off! Ah! but we have no love for s.h.i.+fts.

HERMES. Entrust me with business dealings.

CARIO. But we are rich; why should we keep a haggling Hermes?

HERMES. Let me intrigue for you.[807]

CARIO. No, no, intrigues are forbidden; we believe in good faith.

HERMES. I will work for you as a guide.

CARIO. But the G.o.d sees clearly now, so we no longer want a guide.

HERMES. Well then, I will preside over the games. Ah! what can you object to in that? Nothing is fitter for Plutus than to give scenic and gymnastic games.[808]

CARIO. How useful 'tis to have so many names! Here you have found the means of earning your bread. I don't wonder the jurymen so eagerly try to get entered for many tribunals.[809]

HERMES. So then, you admit me on these terms.

CARIO. Go and wash the entrails of the victims at the well, so that you may show yourself serviceable at once.

A PRIEST OF ZEUS. Can anyone direct me where Chremylus is?

CHREMYLUS. What would you with him, friend?

PRIEST. Much ill. Since Plutus has recovered his sight, I am peris.h.i.+ng of starvation; I, the priest of Zeus the Deliverer, have nothing to eat!

CHREMYLUS. And what is the cause of that, pray?

PRIEST. No one dreams of offering sacrifices.

CHREMYLUS. Why not?

PRIEST. Because all men are rich. Ah! when they had nothing, the merchant who escaped from s.h.i.+pwreck, the accused who was acquitted, all immolated victims; another would sacrifice for the success of some wish and the priest joined in at the feast; but now there is not the smallest victim, not one of the faithful in the temple, but thousands who come there to ease themselves.

CHREMYLUS. Don't you take your share of those offerings?

PRIEST. Hence I think I too am going to say good-bye to Zeus the Deliverer, and stop here myself.

CHREMYLUS. Be at ease, all will go well, if it so please the G.o.d. Zeus the Deliverer[810] is here; he came of his own accord.

PRIEST. Ha! that's good news.

CHREMYLUS. Wait a little; we are going to install Plutus presently in the place he formerly occupied behind the Temple of Athene;[811] there he will watch over our treasures for ever. But let lighted torches be brought; take these and walk in solemn procession in front of the G.o.d.

PRIEST. That's magnificent!

CHREMYLUS. Let Plutus be summoned.

OLD WOMAN. And I, what am I to do?

CHREMYLUS. Take the pots of vegetables which we are going to offer to the G.o.d in honour of his installation and carry them on your head; you just happen luckily to be wearing a beautiful embroidered robe.

OLD WOMAN. And what about the object of my coming?

CHREMYLUS. Everything shall be according to your wish. The young man will be with you this evening.

OLD WOMAN. Oh! if you promise me his visit, I will right willingly carry the pots.

CHREMYLUS. Those are strange pots indeed! Generally the sc.u.m rises to the top of the pots, but here the pots are raised to the top of the old woman.[812]

CHORUS. Let us withdraw without more tarrying, and follow the others, singing as we go.[813]

FINIS OF "PLUTUS"

Footnotes:

[736] The poet jestingly makes Chremylus attribute two utterly opposed characteristics to his servant.

[737] Literally _sycophants_ i.e. denouncers of figs. The Senate, says Plutarch, in very early times had made a law forbidding the export of figs from Attica; those who were found breaking the edict were fined to the advantage of the sycophant ([Greek: phainein], to denounce, and [Greek: sukon], fig). Since the law was abused in order to accuse the innocent, the name sycophant was given to calumniators and to the too numerous cla.s.s of informers at Athens who subsisted on the money their denunciations brought them.

[738] A parody of the tragic style.