Cineverse - Bride Of The Slime Monster Part 23

But how could he succeed? Sure, he'd triumphed over a monster wave, but that was nothing compared with the fates of myriad movie worlds. And things were changing even as he considered what to do next. Perhaps that had been his problem ever since he had gotten here-the Cineverse never stood still long enough for him to make a decision. Far to the west, over the ocean, the sun was sinking toward the horizon. He knew what sunsets meant, too-on this particular movie world, they were approaching The End. That's how surfing movies often ended, with everyone dancing up a storm.

But what did The End mean for all of them, good guys and bad guys? He'd never stayed on a world in the Cineverse long enough to see the conclusion of a plot. Now that he'd won the surfing duel, would they all dance like this forever?

That's when he saw Delores again. She was dancing too, but she didn't look happy about it. Perhaps it was because of her two partners, Mort the Killer Robot, and Diablo, the Gorilla with the Mind of a Man! The two dancing villains were taking turns, grabbing Delores' arms and twirling her about. It took Roger only a second to realize she was a dancer in distress!

Roger jumped down from the arms of the celebrating surfers. He had to be more than the greatest surfer on the beach. He had to save Delores and everyone else from the clutches of Doctor Dread!

But how to do it? He was one man, up against the ama.s.sed evil of the Cineverse. But, as he thought of it, he realized that the Cineverse, and the Cowabunga-munga, might have already shown him the way. Maybe, with song, all things were possible.

"Hit it, Bix!" he yelled, and the Belltones took it from the top as Roger sang along: "Is he threatening Delores?

He's extinct as brontosaurus!

Yeah, he's gone just like a gunshot, Farewell Mort the Killer Robot!"

And Mort the Killer Robot had disappeared before the crowd could say "Hey!" Still dancing, Diablo, the Gorilla with the Mind of a Man, looked at Roger and snarled.

Roger answered with another verse: "Well, he's still dancing with Delores, But he's gone well before the chorus, More forgotten than sarsaparilla, Is Diablo with Mind-of-Man Gorilla!"

The gorilla vanished even more quickly than his metallic companion before him.

Roger grinned and turned to Doctor Dread, his vocal chords throbbing with a new- found power."Now, now, let's not do anything"-Dread paused uncertainly-"hasty.''

"What has that do-gooder done?" Professor Peril wailed. "Where will I ever again find cohorts so economical?"

"Pardon me for interrupting," Menge mentioned, "but perhaps it would be better to ask these questions somewhere else?"

"But you don't understand!" Peril went on, quite beside himself. "Job opportunities are so limited for killer robots and gorillas with brain transplants, they work for almost nothing!"

"Bertha, if you would"-Dread paused in his directions-"escort our distraught compatriot, we will depart until we discover some more"-another brief but discern- ible pause-"advantageous circ.u.mstance for our next meeting?"

But Roger wasn't going to let them go that easily.

"Come on, Bix!" he yelled. "Let's get 'em!"

Roger concentrated as he sang. He wanted this new rhyme to be a killer!

"That Doctor Dread, he is awfully smug-" he began.

"Minions!" Dread yelled. "To my side!"

"But you know his grave's already dug-" Roger added.

"You have not seen the last of-" Dread paused menacingly.

"His time round here is not that long-" Roger continued, undaunted.

"This is not the time for menacing pauses!" Dread exclaimed hurriedly. "See you in the funny papers!"

The blue smoke showed up before Roger could complete his rhyme.

"And Doctor Dread and his gang are gone!" he finished anyway. The Belltones gave him a drum roll as everybody cheered.

Delores ran to him first. "Roger! That was magnificent!"

He took her in his arms. They kissed. Roger had no idea how long it had been since they had kissed; in a place like the Cineverse, it was probably impossible to tell anyway. It didn't matter. Any time at all without Delores was far too long.

They had to breathe eventually.

"I simply figured out a little bit about how the Cineverse works," he explained when he could talk again.Everybody who was gathered around them cheered. And everybody was gathered around them. Roger almost blushed. He was the center of attention-no longer the sidekick he had been considered in the Western movie world. He wished, though, that he might discuss his heroics with Delores someplace that was a bit more private.

"Yes, but it comes to you so naturally!" Delores enthused, not letting Roger get away with his modesty. "It would be much more difficult for us in the Cineverse to rhyme so quickly. Why, people attend Hero School for years and aren't half as good!"

Everybody cheered again.

"So," Big Louie asked, "what do we do now?"

Roger glanced over at the sidekick, who shrugged apologetically.

"Simply moving the plot along," Louie explained.

"As you should," Roger agreed as he gently let go of Delores. "But I have things to tell you-"

"We'll talk as soon as we can," Delores agreed. "But Doctor Dread is certainly plotting his revenge even now. We still need to find Captain Crusader and save the Cineverse. After that, we can attend to"-it was Delores' turn to pause as she glanced wistfully at Roger-"other things.''

Roger felt himself blus.h.i.+ng again. Actually, he had been thinking of talking about the Plotmaster, but now that Delores mentioned it... well... He cleared his throat, which at least seemed a little more heroic.

Delores continued, her voice now brusquely official:"We came to this world with a specific purpose-not to find you, dear Roger, but because this was the most likely whereabouts of Captain Crusader. Now, however, he seems to be nowhere around.

Think, Roger! Have you seen anyone who could be the hero among heroes?"

Captain Crusader? Roger frowned. So-in a way-they had both been on the same errand.

"No," he replied after a moment's reflection, "but I know somebody who can help us." If Captain Crusader was somewhere in the vicinity, he was still hiding. But Roger had thought of Dr. Davenport, and the astonis.h.i.+ng resources of her Inst.i.tute of Very Advanced Science. There, he knew, was one place that had the resources to find Captain Crusader.

"We could go there, but-" He stopped himself mid-sentence when he remembered the crisis on the Advanced Science world with VERA the computer. What if Dr. Dav- enport was still in trouble on her home world? He didn't want to go from the relative safety of the surfing world to a place so potentially risky to his allies and himself. But they had to find Captain Crusader now. Doctor Dread was already too powerful!

That's when Roger realized there might be another way. It was highly experimental, of course, and, in attempting it, he would have to test the limits of the power of surf music, but maybe he could get Movie Magic to work for him!

"But maybe," he added aloud, "I can bring her here."

"How?" Delores asked.

"With the help of Bix Bale and the Belltones," he replied. "Hit it, guys!"

Roger sang, hoping against hope that his gamble would work: "Life on this beach is pretty neat, The sun and surf almost complete; But where's the laughter of young Dee Dee?

I long to hear her go-"

He stopped.

"-tee hee hee!" came a familiar laugh from the back of the crowd.

"It worked!" Roger yelled triumphantly.

"What worked?" Delores asked doubtfully.

"Dee Dee!" Roger called.

"You rang?" a perky voice called back.

"Who rang?" Delores asked. "Roger, are you sure-"

But Roger only nodded.

"Come on over, Dee Dee!"

"Tee hee hee!" The pert beach bunny in the psychedelic green bikini jogged towards them through the crowd.

"This is your solution?" Delores asked gently.

"Exactly!" Roger replied. "This is Doctor Dee Dee Davenport, of the Inst.i.tute of Very Advanced Science!"

"Tee hee hee,'' Dee Dee agreed. She waved at everybody as she trotted into their midst.

"Doctor Davenport?" Delores asked tentatively, offering her hand.

Dee Dee squealed with delight. She shook Delores' hand, her whole body bursting with energy. "Tee hee hee," she added.

Delores glanced at Roger. "The Inst.i.tute of Very Advanced Science?""Well," Roger began. "I know it doesn't look quite-"

"Roger," Delores replied, her voice still far too gentle.

"How do I tell you this? Sometimes, people can be out in the sun too long-"

"But, no!" Roger objected. "She may be a cute and perky beach bunny here-"

"Tee hee hee," Dee Dee demonstrated.

"But on her home world she heads the Inst.i.tute-"

"Personality change," Zabana, Prince of the Jungle, observed. "Like Doctor Dread."

"Roger-" Delores replied, the exasperation rising in her voice. "Would someone shut up that dog?"

"Yip, yip, bark!"

Roger hadn't noticed it before, but it was true. Dwight was going crazy.

"Bark, yip, yip!"

"Dwight says-" Louie began.

"In a moment, Louie," Delores interrupted. "So Dee Dee here heads a scientific inst.i.tute-"

"-that I think can be instrumental in finding Captain Crusader!" Roger said rather more loudly than he should have. He was becoming a bit exasperated himself.

Dwight started barking all over again. Roger would have glanced over at the dog himself, but something large had risen in the sand directly in front of him.

"Please do not raise your voice to the woman who is to be my bride," the thing covered by sand announced.

"What is this?" Roger asked, his voice still not as quiet as it could have been.

"Arf, arf, bark!" Dwight interjected.

"Oh," Delores explained, "that's the Slime Monster."

The pile of sand introduced himself. "My friends call me Edward."

"And you're questioning the company that I keep?" Roger demanded.

"Tee hee hee," Dee Dee laughed appreciatively.

"I don't think jokes are appropriate on my future bride's behalf," the slime monster commented."What?" Roger was becoming even more incensed. "What's this future bride stuff?"

"Arf, bark, yip!" Dwight was getting frantic.

Delores threw up her hands. "Roger, this wasn't my idea."

"Not your idea?" He waved at the mobile pile of sand. "I suppose this guy just swept you off your feet?"

"And I find you cavorting with a beach bunny!" Delores snapped back.

Dee Dee stepped between them.

"Tee hee hee," she began apologetically. "It's time to cool it, guys. Remember, when you go to the beach, don't leave courtesy behind!"

Everybody stopped and stared at the beach bunny. Roger wondered if everyone was thinking the same thing he was: What Dee Dee had just said sounded like something that should be said by the hero among heroes.

"Bark, yip, bark!" Dwight announced with finality.

"Exactly!" Louie replied.

"Captain Crusader!" Delores and Roger exclaimed together.

"So nice of you to-reveal yourself," a particularly oily voice said from the midst of the crowd.

There was a small explosion. Dee Dee clutched at her firm and perky stomach.