Real Life In London Part 25

To this description of Sparkle, the whole company listened with attention and delight, frequently interrupting him with bursts of laughter. Tea was handed round, and then cards introduced. Young Mortimer and Merrywell seemed to take but little interest in the play, and evidently discovered their anxiety to be liberated, having some other object in view. Mortimer felt no great portion of pleasure in pa.s.sing his time with his uncle, the Colonel, nor with his sister, Lady Lovelace, who was a perfect model of London affectation; besides, his friend Mr. Merrywell, who was to him what Tom Dashall and Sparkle had been to Tallyho, had made an engagement to introduce him to some of his das.h.i.+ng acquaintances in the West. Nods and winks were interchanged between them, and could not but be noticed by Tom and Bob, though Sparkle was so intent upon the amus.e.m.e.nts of the moment, and the company of the lovely Caroline, as to appear immoveable.

Mr. Merrywell at length stated that he must be compelled to quit the party. Young Mortimer also apologized; for as he and his friend were engaged for an early excursion in the morning, he should take a bed at his habitation, in order to be fully prepared. This was the first step to breaking up the party.

Merrywell called Sparkle on one side, saying he had something of importance to communicate. It was twelve o'clock, and the gentlemen, after taking a formal leave of the ladies and the Colonel, and a promise on the part of Sparkle to meet them again the next morning at twelve, to escort them to the Exhibition, left the house.

"I am really happy," said Merrywell to Sparkle as they pa.s.sed the door, "to have had the honour of this introduction, and shall have much pleasure in becoming better acquainted with Mr. Sparkle, who, though personally unknown to me, his name and fame are familiar.

~190~~Mr. Mortimer and myself are going to take a review of the neighbourhood of St. James's, probably to shake an elbow."

"Excellent," said Tom; "here is a fine opportunity for Mr. Tallyho to take a like survey, and, if agreeable, we will join the party. Though I am by no means a friend to gaming, I conceive it necessary that every person should see the haunts of its votaries, and the arts they make use of, in order to avoid them."

"You are right, and therefore let us have a peep at them." With this they 'walk'd on, listening with attention to the following lines, which were recited by Sparkle:

"Behold yon group, fast fix'd at break of day, Whose haggard looks a sleepless night betray, With stern attention, silent and profound, The mystic table closely they surround; Their eager eyes with eager motions join, As men who meditate some vast design: Sure, these are Statesmen, met for public good, For some among them boast of n.o.ble blood: Or are they traitors, holding close debate On desp'rate means to overthrow the State?

For there are men among them whose domains And goods and chattels lie within their brains.

No, these are students of the blackest art That can corrupt the morals or the heart; Yet are they oft in fas.h.i.+on's ranks preferred, And men of honour, if you take their word.

But they can plunder, pillage, and devour, More than poor robbers, at the midnight hour; Lay deeper schemes to manage lucky hits, Than artful swindlers, living by their wits.

Like cunning fowlers, spread th' alluring snare, And glory when they pluck a pigeon bare.

These are our gamesters, who have basely made The cards and dice their study and their trade."{1}

1 Gaming is generally understood to have been invented by the Lydians, when they were under the pressure of a great famine. To divert themselves from dwelling on their sufferings, they contrived the b.a.l.l.s, tables, &c. and, in order to bear their calamity the better, were accustomed to play for the whole day together, without interruption, that they might not be rack'd with the thought of food, which they could not obtain. It is not a little extraordinary that this invention, which was originally intended as a remedy for hunger, is now a very common cause of that very evil.

~191~~"True," said Merry well, as Sparkle concluded, though he did not like the satire upon his own favourite pursuit; "those delineations are correct, and the versification good, as far as it applies to the worst species of the gaminghouse."

"O," said Tom, "then pray, Sir, which is the worst?"

"Nonsense," said Sparkle, "there is neither worse nor best; these h.e.l.ls are all alike. _Sharks, Greeks, Gamblers, Knowing Ones, Black-legs, and Levanters_, are to be met with at them all, and _they meet to bite one another's heads off_."

"An admirable description, truly, of the company you are about to introduce us to, Gentlemen," said Tallyho.

"I don't understand Greeks, h.e.l.ls, and Black-legs," said Mortimer, "and should like an explanation."

"With all my heart," replied Sparkle--"_h.e.l.l_ is the general t.i.tle now given to any well-known gaming-house, and really appears to be well chosen; for all the miseries that can fall to the lot of human nature, are to be found in those receptacles of idleness, duplicity, and villany. Gaming is an estate to which all the world has a pretence, though few espouse it who are willing to secure either their estates or reputations: and these h.e.l.ls may fairly be considered as so many half-way houses to the Fleet or King's Bench Prisons, or some more desperate end. The love of play is the most incurable of insanities: robbery, suicide, and the extensive ruin of whole families, have been known to proceed from this unfortunate and fatal propensity.

"_Greeks, Gamblers, Knowing Ones, and Black-legs_, are synonimous terms, applied to the frequenters of the modern h.e.l.ls, or Gaming-houses, and may be distinguished from the rest of society by the following peculiarities in pursuits and manners.

"The _Greeks_ of the present day, though they may not lay claim to, or boast of all the attributes of the _Greeks_ of antiquity, must certainly be allowed to possess that quality for which the latter were ever so celebrated, namely, _cunning and wariness_: for although no modern Greek can be said to have any resemblance to Achilles, Ajax, Patroclus, or Nestor, in point of courage, strength, fidelity, or wisdom, he may nevertheless boast of being a close copier of the equally renowned chief of Ithaca. You will find him in most societies, habited like a gentleman; ~192~~his clothes are of the newest fas.h.i.+on, and his manners of the highest polish, with every appearance of candour and honour; while he subsists by unfair play at dice, cards, and billiards, deceiving and defrauding all those with whom he may engage; disregarding the professions of friends.h.i.+p and intimacy, which are continually falling from his lips.

"To become a good _Greek_ (which, by the way, is a contradiction) it will be found necessary to follow these instructions:

"In the first place, lie should be able to command his temper; he should speak but little, and when he does mingle in conversation, he should most decidedly deprecate play, as a source of the greatest evil that can prey upon society, and elucidate its tendencies by striking examples which are well known to himself, and which are so forcibly impressed upon his recollection, that he is determined never to play deep again, but has no objection to a sociable and friendly game now and then, just to pa.s.s the time away a little agreeably. By this means he may readily mark down his man, and the game once in view, he should not appear too eager in the pursuit of it, but take good care, as the proverb says, to give a sprat, in order to catch a herring. This should be done by allowing some temporary success, before he make a final hit.

"There is perhaps no art which requires so much of continual practice as that of _Greekery_. It is therefore necessary, that the professor should frequently exercise himself in private with cards and dice, in order that his digits may be trained to a proper degree of agility, upon which the success of his art princ.i.p.ally depends. He should also be accustomed to work with some younger man than himself, who, having once been a pigeon, is become a naute, that is enlightened and will not peach--consequently, he serves as an excellent decoy to others.

"To ascertain the property of the pigeon he intends to pluck, is another essential requisite; and when this important information is obtained, (which should be before he commences operations) he should affect the utmost liberality as to time, &c. and make a show of extending every honourable facility to his opponent, even by offers of pecuniary a.s.sistance; by which means, (if he should be fortunate enough to have it accepted) he may probably, by good management, obtain a legal ~193~~security from him, and thus be enabled to fasten on his prey whenever he pleases.

"The t.i.tle of a military man, such as Captain, is very useful to the Greek, as it introduces him well to society, and if he has once held a commission in the army, so much the better. If not, it can be a.s.sumed, so that if any unpleasant regimental peculation should be introduced, he may place his hand on the left side of his breast, declare he is astonished and alarmed at the calumnious spirit of the times, shake his head, and interlard his conversation with common-place e.j.a.c.u.l.a.t.i.o.ns; such as the following--Indeed--No--Why I know Harry very well--he's a bit of a blood--can it be possible--I should not have thought it--bless my heart--exactly so--good G.o.d--a devilish good joke tho'--that's very true, says I--so says he, &c. &c.

"A Greek should be a man of some personal courage, never shrink from a row, nor be afraid to' fight a duel. He should be able to bully, bl.u.s.ter, swagger and swear, as occasion may require; nay, in desperate cases, such us peaching, &c. he should not object even to a.s.sa.s.sination.

He should invite large parties to dine with him frequently, and have a particular sort of wine for particular companies. He should likewise be able to swallow a tolerable quant.i.ty of the juice of the grape himself, as well as know how to appear as if he were drinking, when he is merely pa.s.sing the bottle, and so manage it pa.s.sing, as to seem drunk at proper times. When good opportunities present themselves for the exercise of his art, and when a hit is really to be made, he should positively refuse to suffer play of any kind in his house, alleging that he has seen enough of it, and cut the concern. This serves to increase the desire for it in others. On any decisive occasion, when a train is known to be well laid, he should appear to be drunk before any one of the party; in which case he should take care beforehand to instruct his decoy to pluck the pigeon, while he, as a supposed observer, is betting with some one in the company, (of course an accomplice) and is also a loser.

"Greeks, who know each other, are enabled to convey information by means of private signals, without uttering a word, and consequently without detection. At whist, or other games on the cards, fingers are admirable conveyancers of intelligence, and by dexterous performers ~194~~are so managed, as to defy the closest scrutiny, so as to have the natural appearance of pliancy, while, among the _knowing ones_, their movements are actually deciding the fate of a rubber."

"Egad!" said Mortimer, "you seem to understand the business so well, I wonder you don't open shop."

"My knowledge," continued Sparkle, "is but theoretical. I cannot boast of much practical information, for it is long since I shook the lucky castor."

"O, then, you are discontented because you have no luck."

"Not so," said Sparkle, "for I never play very deep, so that, win or lose, I can never suffer much; but I am willing to give information to others, and with that view I have detailed the nature of the houses and the general character of their frequenters, according to my own conception of them. The _Levanter_ is a _Black-leg_, who lives by the _broads_{l} and the _turf_,{2} and is accustomed to work as it were by _telegraph_{3} with his pal; and if you take the broads in hand in their company, you are sure to be work'd, either by glazing, that is, putting you in the front of a looking-gla.s.s, by which means your hand is discovered by your antagonist, or by private signals from the pal. On the turf he will pick up some n.o.bleman or gentleman, who he knows is not _up to the rig_--bet him fifty or a hundred on a horse--pull out his pocket-book--set down the name, and promise to be at the stand when the race is over; but takes care to be seen no more, unless he is the winner, which he easily ascertains by the direction his pal takes immediately on the arrival of the horses. But hold, we must dismiss the present subject of contemplation, for here we are at the very scene of action, and now for ocular demonstration."

No. 40, now 32, Pall Mall, was the place of destination, a house well known, said, in Koubel's time, to be more _a la Francaise_, and of course more of a gambling-house, than any other of the same description in London. The former were good judges of their business, and did things in prime order; but, if report say true, the new Establishment

1 Broads--A cant term for cards.

2 Turf--A cant term for horse-racing.

3 Telegraph--To work the telegraph, is to impart information by secret signs and motions, previously concerted between the parties.

~195~~has completely eclipsed their precursors: it is now conducted wholly by aliens--by Frenchmen!!! who are said to have realized 80,000L.

within a very short s.p.a.ce of time; and that a certain n.o.bleman, whose name is not Dormouse, has serious reason to remember that he has been a visitor.

These concerns are considered of so much importance, and are found to be so very productive, that regular co-partners.h.i.+ps are entered into, the business is conducted almost with the precision of a mercantile establishment; all kinds of characters embark in these speculations, and rapid fortunes are to be made by them; this alone ought to deter young men from play, since it sufficiently indicates how much the chances are in favour of the tables. But many high and n.o.ble names resort to them.

"There's N--g--nts proud Lord, who, to angle for pelf, Will soon find the secret of diddling himself; There's Herbert, who lately, as knowing one's tell, Won a tight seven hundred at a House in Pall Mall.

Captain D--v--s, who now is a chick of the game, For altho' in high feather, the odds will soon tame; And the Marquis of Bl--ndf--rd, who touch'd 'em up rare For a thousand in Bennet Street (all on the square); There's Li--d and C--m--ck, who'd a marine to be, For none drills a guinea more ably than he; There's a certain rum Baronet, every one knows, Who on Sat.u.r.day nights to the Two Sevens{1} goes,

With J---- and Cl----, Billy W---- and two more, So drunk, that they keep merry h.e.l.l in a roar.

Long D--ll--n, their C--rt--r, a son of a gun; Bill B----, the Doctor, that figure of fun;

Bankers, Dealers and Demireps, Cuckolds in droves, A T--l--r, a T--nf--Id, a Cr--kf--Id, and CI--ves; A H--rtf--rd, a Y--rm--th, of frail ones ten score; X--ft--e, S--br--gt and E--ll--s, and still many more."

"Come along," said Merrywell, "let us see what they are made of; are either of you known? for Cerberus, who keeps the door, is d----d particular, in consequence of some rows they have recently had, and the devil is careful to pick his customers."

"To pluck them, you mean," said Tom; "but perhaps you are in possession of the pa.s.s-word--if so, lead on."

1 The _Two Sevens_--A nick-name for the well-known house, No. 77, Jermyn Street.

~196~~Tallyho had already heard so much about h.e.l.ls, Gambling-houses, and Subscription-houses, that he was all anxiety for an interior view, and the same feeling animated Mortimer. As they were about to enter, they were not a little surprised to find that houses which are spoken of so publicly, have in general the appearance of private dwellings, with the exception that the hall-door is left ajar during the hours usually devoted to play, like those of trap-cages, to catch the pa.s.sing pigeons, and to obviate the delay which might be occasioned by the necessity of knocking--a delay which might expose the customers to the glances of an unsuspecting creditor--a confiding father, or a starving wife; and, as Merrywell observed, "It was to be understood that the entrance was well guarded, and that no gentleman could be permitted to risk or lose his money, without an introduction." A very necessary precaution to obviate the danger of being surprised by the officers of the law; but that rule is too easily to be broken, for any gentleman whom the door-keeper has sufficient reason to think is not an Officer of Justice, finds the avenues to these labyrinths too ready for his admission.

[Ill.u.s.tration: page196 A Modern h.e.l.l]

On pa.s.sing the outer-door, they found themselves impeded by a second, and a third, and each door constructed with a small spy-hole, exhibiting the ball of a ruffian's eye, intently gazing on and examining their figures. It is necessary to observe, that if the visitor is known to be a fair pigeon, or an old crow, he is at once admitted by these gentlemen, and politely bowed up stairs; and as Merrywell appeared to be well known, no obstruction was offered, and they proceeded through the last, which was an iron door, and were shewn directly into the room, which presented a scene of dazzling astonishment.

On entering, they discovered the votaries of gaming around an oblong table, covered with green cloth, and the priests of the ceremony in the centre, one to deal cards and decide events, and another to a.s.sist him in collecting the plunder which should follow such decisions. Being engaged in the play, but little notice was taken of the arrival of the party, except by two or three eagle-eyed gentlemen, who, perceiving there were some _New-comes_{1}

1. Newcomes--The name given to any new faces discovered among the usual visitants.