The Complete Prose Works of Martin Farquhar Tupper Part 35

When Captain Forbes, just sitting down to his soup in the Jamaica Coffee-house, read in the _Morning Post_, the marriage of Charles Tracy with Amy Stuart, he delivered himself mentally as follows:

"There now! Poets talk of 'love,' and I stick to 'human nature.' When that fine young fellow sailed with me, hardly a year ago, in the Sir William Elphinston, he was over head and heels in love with old Jack Tracy's pretty girl, Emily Warren: but I knew it wouldn't last long: I don't believe in constancy for longer than a week. It does one's heart good to see how right one is; here's what I call proof. My sentimental spark kisses Emily Warren, and marries Amy Stuart." The captain, happier than before, called complacently for Cayenne pepper, and relished his mock-turtle with a higher gusto.

It is worth recording, that the same change of name mystified slanderous friends in the Presidency of Madras.

And now, kind-eyed reader, this story of '_The Twins_' must leave off abruptly at the wedding. As in its companion-tale, '_The Crock of Gold_,' one grand thesis for our thoughts was that holy wise command, "Thou shall not covet," and as its other comrade '_Heart_' is founded on "Thou shalt not bear false witness," so in this, the seed-corn of the crop, were five pure words, "Thou shalt not commit adultery." Other morals doubtless grew up round us, for all virtue hangs together in a bunch: the harms of secresy, false witness, inordinate affections, and red murder: but in chief, as we have said.

Moreover, I wish distinctly to make known, for dear "domestic" sake, that so far from our lovers' happiness having been consummated (that is, finished) in the honey-moon--it was only then begun. How long they are to live thus happily together, Heaven, who wills all things good, alone can tell; I wish them three score years. Little ones, I hear, arrive annually--to the unqualified joy, not merely of papa and mamma, but also of our communicative old general, his friend the G.C.B., and (all but most of any) the Laird of Glenmuir and Glenmurdock, whose heart has been entirely rejoiced by Charles Tracy having added to his name, and to his children's names, that of Stuart.

Mr. and Mrs. Tracy Stuart are often at Glenmuir; but oftener at Burleigh, where the general, I fancy, still resides. He protests that he never will keep a secret again: long may he live to say so!

END OF THE TWINS.

HEART;

A SOCIAL NOVEL.

BY

MARTIN FARQUHAR TUPPER, A.M., F.R.S.

AUTHOR OF

PROVERBIAL PHILOSOPHY.

CONTENTS

CHAP. PAGE.

1. Wherein two Anxious Parents hold a Colloquy 245

2. How the Daughter has a Heart; and, what is commoner, a Lover 249

3. Paternal Amiabilities 252

4. Excusatory 257

5. Wherein a well-meaning Mother acts very foolishly 260

6. Pleasant Brother John 263

7. Providence sees fit to help Villany 268

8. The Rogue's Triumph 273

9. False-Witness Kills a Mother, and would willingly Starve a Sister 278

10. How to Help one's self 283

11. Fraud cuts his fingers with his own Edged Tools 289

12. Heart's-Core 293

13. Hope's Birth to Innocence, and Hope's Death to Fraud 296

14. Probable Reconciliation 298

15. The Father finds his Heart for ever 302

16. A Word about Originality, and Mourning 306

17. The House of Feasting 308

18. The End of the Heartless 312

19. Wherein matters are concluded 320

CHAPTER I.

WHEREIN TWO ANXIOUS PARENTS HOLD A COLLOQUY.

"Is he rich, ma'am? is he rich? ey? what--what? is he rich?"

Sir Thomas was a rapid little man, and quite an epicure in the use of that luscious monosyllable.

"Is he rich, Lady Dillaway? ey? what?"

"Really, Thomas, you never give me time to answer," replied the quintescence of quietude, her ladys.h.i.+p; "and then it is perpetually the same question, and--"

"Well, ma'am, can there be a more important question asked? I repeat it, is he rich? ey? what?

"You know, Sir Thomas, we never are agreed about the meaning of that word; but I should say, very."

As Lady Dillaway always spoke quite softly in a whisper, she had failed to enlighten the knight; but he seemed, notwithstanding, to have caught her intention instinctively; for he added, in his impetuous, imperious way,