In the Year of Jubilee Part 58
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'You asked me if she was engaged.'
'Yes--well?'
He had even forgotten his politeness; he saw in her a mere source of information. Jessica moved closer to him on the bench.
'Had you any reason for thinking she was?'
'No particular reason, except something strange in her behaviour.'
'Would you like to know the whole truth?'
It was a very cold night, and a keen wind swept the platform; but Jessica, though indifferently clad, felt no discomfort from this cause.
Yet she pressed closer to her companion, so that her cheek all but touched his shoulder.
'Of course I should,' Barmby answered. 'Is there any mystery?'
'I oughtn't to tell.'
'Then you had better not. But why did you begin?'
'You ought to know.'
'Why ought I to know?'
'Because you--.' She broke off. A sudden chill made her teeth chatter.
'Well--why?' asked Samuel, with impatience.
'Are you--are you in love with her?'
Voice and look embarra.s.sed him. So did the girl's proximity; she was now all but leaning on his shoulder. Respectable Mr. Barmby could not be aware that Jessica's state of mind rendered her scarcely responsible for what she said or did.
'That's a very plain question,' he began; but she interrupted him.
'I oughtn't to ask it. There's no need for you to answer. I know you have wanted to marry her for a long time. But you never will.'
'Perhaps not--if she has promised somebody else.'
'If I tell you--will you be kind to me?'
'Kind?'
'I didn't mean that,' she added hurriedly. 'I mean--will you understand that I felt it a duty? I oughtn't to tell a secret; but it's a secret that oughtn't to be kept. Will you understand that I did it out of--out of friends.h.i.+p for you, and because I thought it right?'
'Oh, certainly. After going so far, you had better tell me and have done with it.'
Jessica approached her lips to his ear, and whispered:
'She is married.'
'What? Impossible!'
'She was married at Teignmouth, just before she came back from her holiday, last year.'
'Well! Upon my word! And that's why she has been away in Cornwall?'
Again Jessica whispered, her body quivering the while:
'She has a child. It was born last May.'
'Well! Upon my word! Now I understand. Who could have imagined!'
'You see what she is. She hides it for the sake of the money.'
'But who is her husband?' asked Samuel, staring at the bloodless face.
'A man called Tarrant, a relative of Mr. Vawdrey, of Champion Hill. She thought he was rich. I don't know whether he is or not, but I believe he doesn't mean to come back to her. He's in America now.'
Barmby questioned, and Jessica answered, until there was nothing left to ask or to tell,--save the one thing which rose suddenly to Jessica's lips.
'You won't let her know that I have told you?'
Samuel gravely, but coldly, a.s.sured her that she need not fear betrayal.
CHAPTER 3
It was to be in three volumes. She saw her way pretty clearly to the end of the first; she had ideas for the second; the third must take care of itself--until she reached it. Hero and heroine ready to her hand; subordinate characters vaguely floating in the background. After an hour or two of meditation, she sat down and dashed at Chapter One.
Long before the end of the year it ought to be finished.
But in August came her baby's first illness; for nearly a fortnight she was away from home, and on her return, though no anxiety remained, she found it difficult to resume work. The few chapters completed had a sorry look; they did not read well, not at all like writing destined to be read in print. After a week's disheartenment she made a new beginning.
At the end of September baby again alarmed her. A trivial ailment as before, but she could not leave the child until all was well. Again she reviewed her work, and with more repugnance than after the previous interruption. But go on with it she must and would. The distasteful labour, slow, wearisome, often performed without pretence of hope, went on until October. Then she broke down. Mary Woodruff found her crying by the fireside, feverish and unnerved.
'I can't sleep,' she said. 'I hear the clock strike every hour, night after night.'
But she would not confess the cause. In writing her poor novel she had lived again through the story enacted at Teignmouth, and her heart failed beneath its burden of hopeless longing. Her husband had forsaken her. Even if she saw him again, what solace could be found in the mere proximity of a man who did not love her, who had never loved her? The child was not enough; its fatherless estate enhanced the misery of her own solitude. When the leaves fell, and the sky darkened, and the long London winter gloomed before her, she sank with a moan of despair.
Mary's strength and tenderness were now invaluable. By sheer force of will she overcame the malady in its physical effects, and did wonders in the a.s.sailing of its moral source. Her appeal now, as formerly, was to the n.o.bler pride always struggling for control in Nancy's character.
A few days of combat with the besieging melancholy that threatened disaster, and Nancy could meet her friend's look with a smile. She put away and turned the key upon her futile scribbling; no more of that.
Novel-writing was not her vocation; she must seek again.
Early in the afternoon she made ready to go forth on the only business which now took her from home. It was nearly a week since she had seen her boy.
Opening the front door, she came unexpectedly under two pairs of eyes.
In the Year of Jubilee Part 58
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In the Year of Jubilee Part 58 summary
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