Tessa Wadsworth's Discipline Part 35

"When my moral perceptions are blunted, I will."

"Go away, saying 'moral perceptions.' I don't know what Dr. Towne will think either. Well, what's did can't be undid! Now Gerald says that I sha'n't put it off, but that I've got to marry him on that day. I know that you think it is horrid, but you never have lovers, so you don't know! I don't see why, either. You are a great deal prettier than I am.

When I am tired, I am the lookingest thing, but you always look sweet and peaceful. Don't you think that I ought to please father and stay home? Why don't you say something? Are you struck dumb?"

"I can not understand it-yet."

"I think that I have made it plain enough," cried Sue, angrily. "You must be very stupid. You like Gerald so much-I used to be jealous-that you ought to be glad for him!"

"I do like him. I like him so well, Sue, that I want him to have a faithful and true wife. O, Sue! Sue Greyson! What are you to take that man's life into your hands?"

"I don't know what you mean. I love him, of course! If you think so much of him, why don't you marry him?"

"The question is not worth a reply."

"You ought to comfort me; I haven't any mother," returned Sue, miserably.

"It is well for her that you haven't."

"I don't see why you can't let me be comfortable," whined Sue; "every thing would be lovely if you didn't spoil it all. Gerald is as wild as a lunatic. He shall write to Stacey or father shall, or I'll be married beforehand and send him the paper. I could do it in ten days. Do come home with me, I want you to see my wedding dress! It's too lovely for any thing. My travelling dress is an elegant brown; I got brown to please Stacey, but Gerald likes it."

"It's a good idea to choose a color that gentlemen like generally; life is so uncertain."

"So it is," replied Sue, unconsciously. "I think that you might congratulate me," she added, with her hysterical laugh. "You didn't think that your gold thimble would make pretty things for Dr. Lake's wife, did you?"

"I congratulate _you_! I hope that I may congratulate him, in time. Dr.

Lake is trying to pour a gallon into a half pint. I hope that one of you will die before you make each other very miserable."

"You mean thing," said Sue, almost crying.

"I do not mean to hurt you, Sue, but you are doing something that is wretched beyond words. Don't you care at all for that poor fellow who loves you?"

"Gerald loves me, too," she answered proudly. "You are ugly to me, and I haven't any body that I dare talk to but you. Mary Sherwood says that telling you things is like throwing things into the sea; n.o.body ever finds them."

"I must be very full of rubbish."

"We are going to Was.h.i.+ngton on our bridal trip; we can't stay long, for father will not spare Gerald. I shall ask n.o.body but Dr. Towne and his mother, and Miss Jewett, and you, and Dine. Will you come?" she asked hesitatingly.

"I will come for Dr. Lake's sake."

"I got a letter from Stacey this morning. I haven't opened it yet; it will make me very sad. I wish that I wasn't so sensitive about things.

It's a dreadful trouble to me. I looked in the gla.s.s the first thing this morning expecting that my hair would be all white. I'm dying to show you my things; do come home with me."

"Sue, do you ever say your prayers?"

"To be sure I do," she replied, with a startled emphasis.

"Then be sure to say them before you write to that poor fellow."

"I wish that you would write for me. Will you come the night before and stay all night with me? I shall be so afraid that the roof will tumble in, or somebody come down the chimney to catch me, that I sha'n't sleep a wink."

The curves of Tessa's lips relented. "Yes, I will come. If somebody come they shall catch me, too."

"You are a darling, after all. We are to be married about noon; Day is to send in the breakfast and the waiters-that _was_ the plan, and if father isn't _too_ mad, I suppose he'll do the same now."

She stood still at the corner. "Well, if I do not see you-good-by till the last night of your girlhood."

"Last night of my girlhood," repeated Sue. "What are the other hoods?"

"Womanhood."

"Oh, yes, and _widowhood_," she said lightly.

Tessa turned the corner and walked rapidly along the pavement.

"Motherhood," she was thinking, "the sweetest hood of all! But I can sooner think of that in connection with a monkey or a b.u.t.terfly than with Sue."

At the next corner another interruption faced her in the forms of Mary Sherwood and laughing Naughty Nan.

The lively chat was ended with an expostulation from Nan. "Now, Mary Sherwood, hurry. You know that I must do several things this afternoon.

I'm going to Mayfield and Green Valley with the handsome black bear, Miss Wadsworth."

It was the day for her afternoon with Mrs. Towne; it had chanced that she had given to her every Tuesday afternoon. It touched her to find the white-haired, feeble, old lady watching for her at the window. Tessa loved her because she was cultured and beautiful; she loved her voice, her shapely, soft hands, her pretty motions, her elegant and becoming dress, and because-O, foolish Tessa, for a reason that she had tossed away, scorning herself-she was Ralph Towne's mother. Not once in all these times had she met Dr. Towne in his own home; not until this afternoon in which he was to take Miss Gerard driving.

"My mother is engaged with callers, Miss Tessa; she asked me to take you to her sitting-room, and to take care of you for half an hour."

"I am sorry to trouble you," said she confusedly. "I want to see Miss Jewett; I will return in half an hour."

"And not give me the pleasure of the half hour? When have you and I had half an hour together?"

She remembered.

"On the last night of the old year, was it not? Come with me and 'take off your things.' Isn't that the thing to say?"

Unwillingly she followed him; he wheeled a chair into one of the wide windows overlooking the Park, laid away hat, sacque, and gloves, then seated himself lazily in the chair that he had wheeled to face her own.

It was almost like the afternoons in the shabby parlor at home; so like them that she could not at first lift her eyes; in a mirror into which she had glanced, she had noticed how very pale lips and cheeks were and how dark her eyes were glowing.

He bent forward in a professional manner and laid two fingers on her throbbing wrist. "Miss Tessa, what are you doing to lose flesh so?"

With that, she lifted her eyes, the color coming with a rush. "Wouldn't you like to see my tongue, too?"

"I know your tongue; it has a sharp point."

"I am sorry."

"No you are not," he answered settling himself back in an easy position, and taking a penknife from his pocket to play with. The small knife, with the pearl handle; how often she had seen that in his fingers. "You are a student, of human nature; tell me what you think of me."

How could she give to that amused a.s.surance the bare, ugly truth!

"How many times have you changed your mind about me?"