Twelve Days: The Beginning Part 7

She watched the range of emotions playing across Vaughn's face as her words sank in.

Dimly, she was aware of activity in the background; the University crowd packing up and leaving, the clinking of cups being cleared away, merry chatter coming from the kitchen and she found herself focusing on the cheerful decorations adorning the interior of the restaurant.

Christmas. In all the recent events she had almost forgotten that they were in the midst of the time of frivolity and cheer, goodwill to all men and so on. Goodwill when on earth had she ever been the recipient of goodwill?

Christmas with Dale was always the same; there would be the usual bottle of perfume, wrapped haphazardly with last year's paper, the television blaring achingly dull re-runs all day long and a growing mountain of empty bottles.

One year, she had decided to invite her parents over for Christmas Day, thinking that they could do the whole traditional shebang. She had bought a turkey and all the tr.i.m.m.i.n.gs and had spent ages cooped up with Delia's finest trying to work out how to cook everything to perfection.

The day had started out well; Dale was sober and on good form. The meal had been OK, not a roaring success but edible at least, and all had been going swimmingly until her Dad had suggested a round of poker.

Not being a particularly good card player, she had opted to sit it out but watched from the sidelines, as her parents took on Dale in the traditional battle of poker face and wills. At first Dale was winning and although they were only betting small amounts, he was beginning to clean her parents out. Just as he was about to finish them off though his luck changed, and, before long, he had lost all of his money. Never one to be a good loser, he started calling both her parents cheats before slamming out of the room and then out of the front door. He hadn't returned for several hours by which time he was well and truly drunk.

Her parents had left shortly after Dale, both trying hard to hide their concern for their daughter's wellbeing. In the end, her Dad had opted for patting her on the shoulder and telling her that there was always a home for her with them. She had smiled weakly, rea.s.suring them that all was fine and that Dale was just highly strung sometimes.

Since that day her parents had never been back to her house and Dale had restricted her visits, only allowing her to go to them once a month. The whole thing was ridiculous and, to start with, she had argued with him telling him that he had absolutely no right to tell her when she could see her own parents. Dale did not see his parents, and failed to see why she needed to have contact with hers.

After she had defied him and managed to fit in three visits one month, he had taken her up to their room and proceeded to force himself upon her in a way that only a man can that had been the very first time that he had raped her.

Unfortunately that day had been just the beginning and since then he had used his physical strength to overcome her on a regular basis, teaching her 'lessons' until she started to behave in a way that he saw fit. It was becoming increasingly difficult to please him as time went on; the rules changed on a daily basis and as a result, she became more a product of Dale than of herself. He had broken her spirit over the years, changed part of who she was and now she was just too tired to fight.

A plate smas.h.i.+ng in the background snapped her out of her reverie and she almost flinched as the full force of Vaughn's angry glare connected with hers.

"Five years, Elise!" he nearly bellowed, "Five f.u.c.king years! Jesus Christ!"

He took a moment to steady himself; no doubt becoming aware that they were still in a public place and whilst deserted, there were still plenty of ears around, taking in every word.

"Five years...." he said again, more calmly than before, "five b.l.o.o.d.y years...."

Elise sat silently; there was really nothing she could say. Vaughn was still staring at her, almost as if looking at her for the first time. She could see the cogs whirring but she had no idea what he was thinking. Did he despise her now that he knew the truth....think that she was weak? Maybe she was weak, but who was he or anyone else to judge? It was her life and until anyone else lived it exactly as she did, they were in no position to comment on her decisions.

"Why, Elise?" he asked softly, "Why would you put up with that for five years? G.o.d help me but I really don't understand." His gaze was imploring, calm now and she felt compelled to offer some kind of explanation.

"It hasn't always been bad." she said. Now was not the time to go into all of the sordid details but she didn't want Vaughn to think that she had been a complete pushover all of the time.

"We met at University and at the start it was brilliant - everything I had ever wanted. Dale had a career lined up here and I was more than happy to take on a supporting role. A few years into our marriage, things ....changed." She hesitated "And since then, Dale has struggled with some aspects of our life. Unfortunately when he drinks, he can take it out on me."

She said the last sentence really quietly it was so hard talking about this stuff, particularly with someone who was a virtual stranger and she felt ashamed to admit to what her life had become.

Vaughn was still silent; considering, weighing things up and for a moment she saw the shadow of pain cross his features again, as if reliving an unpleasant memory. It was fleeting though and when he turned his eyes onto her again, she saw sympathy in their dark depths.

He reached across the table again and took her hand.

"I am really struggling here, Elise; - I just don't know what to say. Part of me wants to go to that hospital and beat the s.h.i.+t out of your husband again and part of me just wants to wrap you up in cotton wool and shower you with roses to show you how you should really be treated."

At that Elise burst out laughing surprising both herself and Vaughn.

"What?? What did I say?"

"It was the cotton wool and roses thing, that's pretty much exactly the same thing that Cole said! What it is about men and cotton wool and roses?"

As if Vaughn had just said the funniest thing on earth, she continued to laugh until she became hysterical and tears were pouring down her cheeks. At first they were tears of laughter but in no time at all they had turned into tears of sorrow and before she knew it, she was sobbing uncontrollably.

In a coffee shop. In the middle of the night. In front of her boss. c.r.a.p.

Vaughn obviously realised the moment that the tears changed and jumped out of his seat, going around to her side of the booth and sliding in next to her putting his arm around her shoulders and pulling her tightly against him.

She continued to sob into Vaughn's s.h.i.+rt with endless wracking sobs. She knew she was making a fool of herself but it was like the floodgates had opened and she was powerless to stop it. Clearly opening up to Vaughn, even the few small facts that she had done, must have had some cathartic effect and whilst she had done her fair share of crying in the past, it had never been like this. She felt totally and utterly drained and she had no clue as to how she was ever going to get back to normal again.

Eventually, the sobs began to ease and Elise became aware of the fact that Vaughn's s.h.i.+rt was completely soaked. He didn't appear to notice though and kept her tight to his side, rubbing his hand soothingly up and down her arms and her back, letting her cry it all out.

She was vaguely aware of him signalling to the waitress and then a warm flannel was pressed onto her face; soothing her, wiping away her tears and she found herself unbelievably grateful for the thoughtfulness of the gesture. In the back of her mind she registered that Dale would never do anything like that for her but she pushed the thought away. Now was not the time for negative contemplations, she wanted to enjoy these last few moments with this man until he sent her on her way and moved onto someone with a lot less baggage the way that she knew he undoubtedly would.

Subconsciously she frowned, and Vaughn lifted her chin up and looked deep into her eyes.

"Hey..." he said soothingly "It's OK. Look, if it's OK with you let's get out of here."

Dully, she nodded this was it, the moment that he took her back to her car and walked out of her life. He would be kind - of course he would - but he would make his feelings clear and insist that their relations.h.i.+p remain purely professional from now on. Not that she could blame him of course, they had only known each other a matter of days but he had already broken up a fight on her account, been shouted at by her and now she had soaked his s.h.i.+rt with endless pent-up tears. She didn't know any man that would put up with that type of behaviour - let alone someone as striking and wealthy as this man. He didn't need her c.r.a.p in his life and she had no doubt that her little performance just now had cemented that fact for him.

She dropped her head as they left the coffee shop, unwilling to meet his eyes. Even though she was certain she would see sympathy, that wasn't what she wanted to see from him. Cole gave her sympathy; he gave her enough sympathy to last a lifetime and for that she was endlessly grateful. That was his role in her life not necessarily the role that either of them would have chosen, but nonetheless the role that he had taken on.

This man, this huge powerful man beside her she didn't know what she wanted from him but she knew that it wasn't sympathy. Indeed, she had no right wanting anything from him when she knew she could never give him anything back. But she knew with absolute certainty that she definitely didn't want him to leave her life just yet. Absolutely not.

Chapter Fourteen.

They got back into Vaughn's car and Elise was surprised to see him turn towards town rather than follow the coast road back to Indigo and her car.

She looked across at him suspiciously. "Where are we going? My car is back at Indigo."

"Don't worry," he replied "I'll drop you back for your car later. I thought we could go to my place, it's not far from here and I thought you might appreciate the peace and quiet. I also figured you probably didn't want to be alone right now."

Amazed at the intuition of this man she leaned back in her seat, content to let the hum of the engine and the motion of the car lull her and calm her after her outburst. Relief swept over her as she realised that he was not going to push her out of his life just yet and she became aware of just how drained she was. The way that she was feeling now was way beyond anything that she had ever experienced before. It was like she was watching her life unfold in front of her; powerless to control it, stop it or change it. It was unbelievably scary but in many respects it was hugely liberating. For the first time in nearly five years, she allowed herself to hope. Hope that perhaps things could change for the better and that maybe, with this beautiful man at her side, her life could turn around completely.

Abruptly she stopped her train of thought; she was getting way ahead of herself. Yes, Vaughn desired her - he had said as much - but he really only knew a fraction of her life. He had never mentioned anything other than wanting her and that was always only ever going to be temporary. She was sure that the level of desire they had experienced couldn't last indefinitely and if she allowed herself to get sucked into his life on that basis, she would have n.o.body left when it all went wrong. She would have burned her bridges with Dale and she would be left with nothing. She had to remember that. Vaughn was only a band aid; he would never be the cure.

As far as she knew, Vaughn was still single and that concerned her slightly, as she wondered what the reason for that was. Whilst she didn't know exactly how old he was, she suspected he must be mid thirties and given his looks and money, he surely by now would have been snapped up? On the basis that he hadn't been, she could only conclude that he wasn't a forever-type of guy and she needed to realise that if she was going to change her life, she had to do it for herself and by herself. Because she wanted to not because of anyone else.

Besides which, she was married. Now even she was beginning to forget that fact.

Vaughn glanced at her periodically but chose to remain quiet. Heaven only knew what he was thinking. As they turned onto a lighted street, she looked across at the play of light on his face. This was the second time she had been in a car with him and the second time she had been far too distracted by him. This was getting to be a bit of a habit. What had happened to the girl who only a few hours earlier had been planning to have a sensible conversation with him, sort out their differences and press forward with a working relations.h.i.+p, all the awkwardness forgotten? She had left the building clearly.

There was no way she was going to feel anything but awkward around him for a while considering that she had just cried more tears into his expensive s.h.i.+rt in one night than she had cried into cheap tissues her entire lifetime. She sighed and turned back to look out of the window. Everything was such a mess.

After another few minutes, they pulled up outside a small but fairly exclusive looking block of flats. From what she could see in the dark, the building formed a U shape around a central courtyard, the open end of the U being gated. Vaughn pulled into a dedicated s.p.a.ce out the front and came around to open her door, helping her out.

As they approached the gates, she could see that the building was two storeys high. Each side of the U appeared to have two flats on the ground floor and one larger one across the whole of the first floor. She quickly calculated there must be nine flats in total, which corresponded with the numbers on the entryway intercom. Vaughn pressed a code into the keypad beside the intercom and the gates swung open allowing them access into the courtyard.

She walked forward and stopped in her tracks; even at night she could see that the courtyard was absolutely beautiful. The centrepiece was a large waterfall which ended in a sizeable pond, all contained within a low walled area. Surrounding this were several raised beds with large oriental looking plants and concealed lighting giving the entire courtyard an ethereal quality. The whole centrepiece was encompa.s.sed in a stunning pergola which had roses, honeysuckle and clematis climbing all over it. Whoever had designed this courtyard had been clever with their planting; the choice of the three climbers ensured that there were flowers and fragrance most of the year round. At present the clematis was flowering but Elise knew that, come early spring, the honeysuckle would take over to be swiftly followed by the roses in the summer.

A number of benches were situated at various points in the courtyard and she had to stifle a sudden urge to go and sit on one and just take in the whole ambience. She could imagine that this would be a quiet and peaceful place at any time of the day and really hoped that this wouldn't be the last time she would ever see it. In her heart though, she knew that it probably would be.

Vaughn lived at number eight; the first floor flat directly opposite the entrance and he rested his hand lightly on her back as he guided her to the stairwell that led to his front door. Taking a key out of his pocket, he opened the door and stepped aside to allow her to enter.

The flat consisted of a long hallway that covered approximately two thirds of the length; the first door on the left led to a room that looked like a study. This room didn't have a window but light was provided by the most stunning roof light, which allowed dappled moonlight to filter through. It gave the room a romantic hue and Elise found herself hurrying back out of the room before she became hypnotised by the imagery.

The next door on the left of the hallway led to a modern kitchen that appeared to have all the mod cons. There was a large central window which overlooked the courtyard and an island in the middle with a slate worktop over a farmhouse-style cream suite. The remainder of the floor and eye-level cabinets co-ordinated, giving the room an overall cosy feel which Elise really admired.

Aware that Vaughn was following her on her exploratory tour of his domain, wry smile firmly on his lips, she continued along, determined to see what was hidden behind each doorway. Her fascination with this man knew no bounds and she was shocked at how forward she was being in a total stranger's home pus.h.i.+ng open doors, walking wherever she chose. Her manners had completely deserted her but Vaughn made no comment, silently following wherever she went.

There were three doors on the right of the hallway which led to two bedrooms and the bathroom. The bedrooms both had internal connecting doors to the bathroom in the centre, giving the illusion of each having their own en-suite. The larger of these two bedrooms was clearly Vaughn's and almost as soon as she entered she backed out, a flush of embarra.s.sment creeping through her body at the thought of being caught in his most private s.p.a.ce. She heard a low laugh from behind her and realised that her reaction had not been missed d.a.m.n him for noticing everything.

The windows on this side of the flat looked out over the countryside beyond. Elise was surprised to see this given that they were still in the main town of Eastwood. Maybe it was built on the outskirts? She had lost all sense of bearing on the journey and it really didn't seem important to find out right now.

At its end, the hallway opened up into a stunning lounge/dining room that had views on two sides, both out onto the countryside beyond. A couple of standard lamps gave some muted light and Elise could make out a pair of functional sofas, a coffee table and a well-sized dining table with six chairs. In between the two windows and on the far side of the wall was a state-of-the-art flat screen television and Elise found herself smiling at the mental image of Vaughn sat here of an evening with the ancient countryside just outside of his door and every modern convenience inside. His home was perfect and it reflected the little that she did know about him. A modern man with old-fas.h.i.+oned values with the exception of the sanct.i.ty of marriage it would seem.

As they entered the lounge, Vaughn turned on a couple more lights and threw his keys on the table. He gestured for her to sit on one of the sofas and lit a gas flame fire she hadn't noticed on first inspection. In front of the fire was a huge woollen lounge rug in a rich burnt copper shade, the pile so deep that Elise just ached to slip off her shoes and rub her bare toes into it. The warmth from the fire started to permeate the room and Elise felt herself relaxing a little; this really was a beautiful home and she was alarmed to realise how right it felt just being here.

"I'm going to get a drink would you like one, Elise?" Vaughn stood by the side of the sofa expectantly and she glanced at him, realising that he had asked her a question.

"Huh? Oh sorry yes please. Whatever you're having would be great."

She watched as he disappeared into the kitchen, admiring the way he moved; the sway of his b.u.t.tocks encased in perfectly fitting jeans, his strong shoulders, narrow waist and hips, the proud way in which he carried himself. The kitchen adjoined the lounge/dining area via an open archway and it wasn't long before she heard clinking sounds and he reappeared holding two gla.s.ses of what looked like whisky. He pa.s.sed one to her, their fingers brus.h.i.+ng against each other for a second, and her hand lit up in flames at the infinitesimal contact. Tentatively she sipped her drink, pleased to find that it was indeed whisky and a good one at that, perfect for calming her overwrought nerves. Usually she preferred to drink wine but she definitely needed something stronger tonight and mentally she added it to her alcohol intake for the evening, realising that she would now be paying for a cab to get home.

"Thank you." She said, indicating her drink. She didn't know what else to say. Absently, she watched the flames in the fire flickering and dancing, wondering what it felt like to be that completely free.

Vaughn took a seat on the sofa opposite to her and was silent for a while too, although she could feel that he was watching her. Eventually she looked away from the fire to find his eyes fixed on her face, watching her with an intensity that made her s.h.i.+ver.

"Elise..." he said "I want to apologise for what I am about to say. I'm sorry, but I just can't help myself." he paused, as if weighing his words. When he finally spoke, although she was prepared, his words still shocked her to the core.

"You are so f.u.c.king beautiful and so s.e.xy. I don't think you realise it. I can't bear to think of how that b.a.s.t.a.r.d treats you. If you were mine..." he stopped, swallowed, and closed his eyes briefly.

"If you were mine, I would look after you as though my life depended on it. I would never hurt you, never damage your beautiful skin and I would never want to see pain in your eyes. You would be my world and no one would ever be able to hurt you again." He moved to sit next to her and took her hands between his.

"Let me help you Elise. Let me help you to sort this out. I don't understand why you haven't left that low-life before now but maybe it's time. Maybe this needs to be a turning point for you for both of us. We can be good together, I know we can. It'll be so f.u.c.king good." He whispered as he continued to hold her hands. She saw the intensity and the belief in his words there, in his eyes.

Elise wanted to believe too. She wanted to believe that it would be that simple but in the end when all was said and done, would it really? How did he know that? They had only just met and they knew next to nothing about each other how on earth could she justify leaving Dale for someone she knew so little about? Sure they had intense chemistry and she found herself with feelings for him that she thought had long since been buried but what if that were all it was? What if there was nothing left when that burnt out? Where would that leave her then? It was the same questions going round and round in her head and she was beginning to get sick and tired of there being no answer.

She stood and began to pace the room aware that his eyes were watching her every move, hoping that the movement would bring with it some clarity. As she reached the window, she noticed a small bookcase tucked in the corner and her eyes were drawn to a photo in a silver frame which was sitting on the top. Picking it up, she recognised a slightly younger Vaughn who was laughing into the camera along with Stephen and a very beautiful woman. Stephen? Why on earth would Vaughn have a photo of Stephen?

It was then that she remembered something he had said earlier that night that he had been at the club with Stephen celebrating a friend's birthday. Obviously the two of them must know each other outside of work; another little fact of which she was completely unaware.

"Stephen," she said out loud, "I didn't realise you knew Stephen other than from work?"

Vaughn stood up and walked across to join her, looking at the photo in her hands.

"Stephen and I go.... way... back" he hesitated, "We've been friends for a long time."

"Oh .." she said not really sure of what else to say. Stephen had never mentioned the friends.h.i.+p either, which seemed odd. Why would they not be open about knowing each other? She looked back at the photo. Both men were stunning but so was the woman standing in-between them. She was unbelievably attractive; one of the most striking women Elise had ever seen.

"This woman," she pointed to the picture, "she's very beautiful; she almost resembles Stephen." The girl had the same blond hair and blue eyes as Stephen's, very similar to her own in fact, but where Stephen had a typical surfer dude image, the woman was all cool elegance and she looked right at home tucked in-between Stephen and Vaughn.

"Is she related to Stephen?"

Abruptly Vaughn stepped away, his face becoming shuttered and closed and for a moment Elise didn't think that he was going to answer her. Seconds stretched into minutes and the silence thickened. Eventually he spoke.

"Yes..." he said hoa.r.s.ely, "his sister, Natalie."

The pain in his reply was obvious and Elise registered that this wasn't a topic that she should pursue and so she replaced the photo and headed back to the sofa. His reaction intrigued her. In the few days that she had known him, she had never felt him less than in control. But a simple photo seemed to have the power to almost bring him to his knees and she wondered what the story was. And if it was so painful, why did he keep the photo? She knew Stephen of course but Natalie? She had never heard Stephen talk about a sister and yet he obviously had one. Who was she? What was she? A skeleton in Vaughn's closet perhaps? Part of his past? Or maybe his present? But then who was she to judge? She had a whole graveyard lurking in hers.

Vaughn was by now standing in front of the fire watching the flames and he appeared lost in memories, the shadow of pain that she had seen once before etched onto his features. She watched the glow reflecting on his face as he tried to bring whatever emotion he was feeling, back under control.

She sat back down on the sofa quietly, almost feeling as if she was intruding on a private moment and crossed her legs, reaching for her gla.s.s again. He turned at the sound and his eyes travelled the length of her legs, his face changing almost instantly; a wicked smile forming as her watched her dress slide higher up her thighs when she moved. She nervously tugged at the hem of her dress and Vaughn laughed lightly. Relieved that his dark moment seemed to have pa.s.sed, she glanced back up at him to find his eyes once again on hers.

"You haven't answered me."

Elise hesitated; she really didn't know what to say...It was all just too confusing. The way she was feeling about him, the emotions he seemed to bring out in her, the physical attraction between them, his offer to help her leave Dale she had no idea what to make of it all. Too much had happened too quickly and she felt like her head was struggling to catch up.

"I don't know, Vaughn "she said "You have to understand that this for me...this is a big thing. I've been married for ten years and despite our...differences...he is my husband 'til death do us part. Cliched, I know, but I didn't take those vows lightly and part of me still believes that this marriage can work. Dale just needs to get...."

"He needs to get the f.u.c.k out of your life." Vaughn almost shouted, suddenly angry, cutting off the rest of her sentence. "He doesn't deserve anything from you, not one single thing and I couldn't give a s.h.i.+t about your vows! He broke those the moment he first touched you in anger. How far has he gone, Elise? How far?!" His eyes were dark pools of anger, spitting flames at her as he stood above her, dominating her, scaring her. She had been here before she did not want to be here again.

"What the h.e.l.l do you mean?" she shouted back, "Who the h.e.l.l do you think you are, bringing me here, demanding things, pa.s.sing judgement on my life and then trying to intimidate me? I DO NOT NEED THIS." She almost screamed and went to get up from the sofa; to get out of there, to go somewhere, anywhere that she could be alone.

Vaughn quickly closed the distance between them and knelt on the floor in front of her, placing a gentle hand on her thigh; the heat transferring between them in that one touch, effectively rendering her helpless. He visually calmed himself and took a couple of deep breaths, his eyes imploring her to stay.

"I'm so sorry. Please. Stay. We need to talk - I need to talk." he said, "I don't want to scare you s.h.i.+t, that's the last thing I would ever want to do."

"Look at me, Elise" he said and gently used his other hand to raise her chin, allowing their eyes to connect.

"Look at me..." Slowly she raised her eyes to his, "I would never, ever hurt you I promise that with all my life. I may get angry, but believe me I would never take that out on you. Never. Please believe me." He ran his hands absently through his hair. "Christ, I am so far out of my depth here, you have no idea."

She continued to gaze steadily at him, watching as he struggled with whatever it was that he wanted to say.

"Do you believe me, Elise?" he asked softly and she nodded, realising in that moment that whatever else happened she did trust this man - implicitly. And that scared the life out of her. "I want to be in your life, Elise, and I need to understand. I need to know how far he has gone, how much he has hurt you and what exactly he has done to you. I have to know."

Clasping her hands between her knees to stop them shaking, she looked down at the floor, absently noting the weave of his trousers as she tried to work out what to say. She knew that she owed this man the truth wherever their future lay, it wouldn't amount to anything unless they built it on truth.

"He has. .h.i.t me," she said quietly, "A lot but never anywhere visible. Up until Friday he had never done anything in public. I have no idea why he came to the office; I guess that's something I'll have to try to work out with him." She stopped, glanced back up at Vaughn and then dropped her eyes again, her voice even smaller now. "He's restrained me too. At first I used to fight it but that just hurt more so, now I just let him get it out of his system."

It was so hard talking about all of this. If she kept it locked up inside, part of her could almost believe that it wasn't happening but now, talking about it openly and not just to Cole anymore when he was patching her up, to someone else of her own free will; that suddenly gave it all a life, made it become real and she was amazed at how calm and matter-of-fact she sounded. The numbness inside, her almost clinical delivery of the truth she guessed that the years of abuse had done that to her and she hadn't realised quite how accustomed to it all she had actually become.

On top of her leg she felt Vaughn's hand stiffen and she could almost feel the anger that he was trying to hold in check.