Comedies by Holberg : Jeppe of the Hill, The Political Tinker, Erasmus Montanus Part 19

GIRL. Tell your master that he can lie like ten tinkers. I have worn out a pair of shoes running to and fro after the dripping-pan.

HENRICH. I say, whom do you want to speak to?

GIRL. I want to speak to Master Herman.

HENRICH. You are on a wild-goose chase. Burgomaster von Bremenfeld lives here.

GIRL. It is a scandal when people can't get their things done, and have to let themselves be made fools of by a miserable tinker.

HENRICH. If you have any fault to find with tinkers, you must go to the Council Hall; you will get justice there, or I don't know Burgomaster von Bremenfeld.

TWO LACKEYS. Our ladies are desirous of announcing that if it suits the convenience of Madam Burgomaster, they should like to have the honor of waiting on her.

HENRICH (to the Girl). Now, do you see, you sc.u.m of the earth, that it's no tinker that lives here? (To the servants.) I will inquire if the burgomaster's lady is at home.

[The Girl goes.

HENRICH (to Geske). Here are two councillors' ladies outside, who want to talk to the mistress.

GESKE. Let them in.

SCENE 5

(Enter Madame Abrahams and Madame Sanderus. They kiss Geske's ap.r.o.n.)

MME. ABRAHAMS. We have come here to-day to offer our most humble congratulations and to temoigner the heartfelt joy and delight that we feel at your advancement, and at the same time to recommend ourselves to your favor and affection.

GESKE. Tres humble servitoor! I wonder if you wouldn't like to drink a cup of coffee.

MME. ABRAHAMS. We thank Madam Burgomaster, but this time we have come only to offer congratulations.

GESKE. Tres humble servitoor! But I know you like coffee. Perhaps you just want to be urged. Be so good as to sit down; the coffee is all ready. Henrich!

HENRICH. Gracious madam?

GESKE. Have you put the syrup in the coffee?

HENRICH. Yes, I have. [Exit.

GESKE. Please, good ladies, won't you have some?

MME. SANDERUS. I hope you will be so good as to excuse us, but we never drink coffee.

GESKE. Oh, nonsense, I know better I beg you be seated.

MME. SANDERUS (aside to Mme. Abrahams). Oh, ma soeur, I am sick at the mere thought of that syrup.

GESKE. Henrich, come fill the cups.

(Enter Henrich.)

MME. SANDERUS. That is enough, my good man. I can drink only half a cup.

HENRICH. I am to ask Madam Burgomaster to step in for a moment and speak to the burgomaster.

GESKE. Excuse me, good ladies, I must go for an instant. You shall shortly have the honor of seeing me again.

[Exeunt Henrich and Geske.

SCENE 6

MME. ABRAHAMS. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! Whom is the joke on now, my sister, she whom we laugh at in our sleeves as we sit here, or we who have to drink coffee with syrup in it?

MME. SANDERUS. For Heaven's sake don't mention the syrup again! My stomach comes up into my throat when I think of it.

MME. ABRAHAMS. Did you notice the airs she put on when we kissed her ap.r.o.n? Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! I shall never forget as long as I live that "Tres humble servitoor." Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha!

MME. SANDERUS. Don't laugh so loud, sister, I'm afraid they can hear it.

MME. ABRAHAMS. Oh, it is a real art to be able to keep from laughing. And wasn't that the sweetest dog she had in her arms? The loveliest watch-dog one might wish for. I am sure it was called "Joli" into the bargain. Heavens, heavens, how true it is, as people always say, that no one is more arrogant than those who come up from the dregs into positions of honor! That is why nothing is more dangerous than these sudden changes. People who are of good stock and are properly brought up are only too glad to stay as they were, or even to become more humble, when they rise to higher distinction.

But those who grow up quickly out of nothing, like mushrooms, seem to come naturally by intolerable pride.

MME. SANDERUS. I wonder what the reason can be? I should think such people ought rather to be humbled by the thought of their former position.

MME. ABRAHAMS. The reason must be that those who come from good families have never suspected any one of despising them, and consequently don't worry about how they are received, whereas common people have always suspected every one, and think that every word and every glance is intended as a reflection on their previous state, and so they seek to a.s.sert their dignity by making themselves imperious and tyrannous. Believe me, dear sister! There is something in springing from good stock. But here comes the boy; we had better be still.

SCENE 7

(Enter Henrich.)

HENRICH. The good ladies must not let the time seem long. The madam is coming back in a minute. The burgomaster has presented her with a new collar for her dog, but it was a little too wide; so the tailor is in there taking the measure of the dog's neck. As soon as that's settled, she will come back. But I hope you good ladies won't take it amiss, if I ask you a favor: will you be so good as to think of me in a little remembrance, for I have heavy work, and slave like a beast here in the house.

MME. ABRAHAMS. Gladly, my friend! Here is a gulden,--you will accept it.

HENRICH. Ah, my best thanks! I hope that I may serve you ladies again. Now, you must drink your fill while the mistress is out; she won't be angry, or if she is, I will make it all right.

MME. ABRAHAMS. My good man, the greatest service you can do us is not to urge us.

HENRICH. As I say, gentle ladies, I know the mistress won't mind; you simply must drink. Perhaps it isn't sweet enough. I will go get some more syrup.--But here she comes herself.