Speak Bird, Speak Again Part 16

As he was taking her up, she rubbed her foot against a thorn on a rose bush. Blood flowed from the scratch, and she cried out, "Ouch! You wounded my foot!"

"Would that my hand and foot were both broken," he answered, "rather than your foot scratched!" Pulling out the royal handkerchief, he bandaged her foot with it.

"If my father were to go asking for your hand from your father," he said, "would he give you to me?"

"Yes," she answered.

When he had brought her up to the palace, he said, "For the sake of Allah, let me sleep a while on your knee."

She let him put his head in her lap, and he fell asleep. Stealing away by the bottom of the stairs, she went straight home.

"Uncle's wife!" she said, "Tomorrow, he'll be back."

"O, my daughter!" said the other, "May Allah hear you and let my son come back!"

Now, the household of the king had been wearing black in mourning. "Take off these black things," said the bride to her mother-in-law, "and put on beautiful clothes! Decorate the house! It's certain. He's coming home tomorrow." She then went up to the king.

"Uncle," she said, "send out a party to receive Ala'iddin. He's coming back home."

"How can I send anybody out?" asked the king. "What if he should refuse?"

"He won't refuse," she answered. "He's going to come."

The king sent members of his court, and they went to bring Ala'iddin back. As for him, he came straight with them. On their way up the stairs, the king's son of course went ahead of the others. Meanwhile, his bride had called a servant over, given her a plate, and said, "As soon as the king's son comes up, throw this plate in front of him." The servant stood behind the door and threw down the plate as soon as he came up. He cried out: "Pox upon her Who hurled to the floor The plate that came cras.h.i.+ng!"

His bride answered him: "And pox upon him Who pulled out the scarf - The scarf of the kingdom put, As bandage to my foot!"

"Were you the one then whose foot I bandaged?" he cried out, and came running over to her.

They lived happily ever after, and may Allah make life sweet for all my listeners!

Clever Hasan

TELLER: Once upon a time - but first a prayer of peace for the Virgin!

AUDIENCE: Peace be to her!

Once upon a time there was a king Who had an only son and no other. One day the father died. Taking his mother with him, the son said, "Mother, let's go traveling around these lands. We ought to have some fun."

With her on one mare and him on another, they went out and traveled, traveled, traveled. They came upon a man sitting at the crossing of three roads.

"Hey, uncle!" called out the boy.

"What do you want?" the man answered.

"What road is this?" asked the boy.

"This one's the Road of Safety," the man replied. "That one's the Road of Regret, and the other's a road that sends but does not bring back."

"I'm taking the Road of No Return," announced Clever Hasan.

"O Clever Hasan! For the sake of Allah! For the sake of the Prophet! For the sake of Jesus and Moses!"

"Never!" said the youth. "I must take this road."

"But you will surely did"

"Let that be as it may!" declared the boy. "When my life span has run out, let me die."

Setting out on that road, he came upon a giant with his head in the sky and his feet on the ground.

"Peace to you!"

"Welcome!" said the giant. "But, Clever Hasan, who's given you permission to pa.s.s this way?"

"I want to pa.s.s? insisted the lad.

"This means war!"

"So be it!"

Drawing his sword, Clever Hasan struck him a blow which cut off his legs and threw him to the ground.

"Ouch!" roared the giant. "No one has ever been able to defeat me before. Here, take the keys to my palace! You and your mother can stay in it."

They stayed in the palace. Of course, what does a king have to do but go out hunting and shooting? One day, he went out to take the air, and his mother took pity on the black giant. Every day she would bring some cotton and wash his legs, dressing them with iodine until they healed. They fell in love and married, without Clever Hasan knowing what was going on behind his back. She became pregnant and gave birth, to a boy the first time. Becoming pregnant again, she gave birth to a boy the second time.

"What am I going to do?" she asked. "If Clever Hasan finds out, he's going to cut off my head."

"Come," said the giant, "Do you see that orchard full of pomegranate trees? No one has ever gone into that orchard without being torn to pieces."

"It's a simple matter then," said the mother. Taking some turmeric, she dyed her face yellow.

"May you be well again, mother!" said Clever Hasan when he came home. "What's the matter, mother? What happened to you?"

"Nothing's really the matter, son," she answered. "I just want to taste the pomegranates from that orchard over there before I die."

"That's easy, mother," he said. "Supply me with enough provisions to take care of my needs there and back."

Mounting his horse, he traveled. Arriving, he came upon a sheikh sitting there.

"Peace to you!" the lad hailed him.

"Welcome!" replied the sheikh. "Had your salaam not come first, I would have gobbled you up and licked the flesh off your bones! Where are you going, Clever Hasan?"

"By Allah, most venerable sheikh, I'm on my way to get some pomegranates for my mother."

"Ho! Ho!" laughed the sheikh. "I've been sitting here for the last twenty years, and I'm still waiting to taste those pomegranates. But until now, no one has ever gone into that orchard and come out alive."

"Allah will deliver. me," replied Hasan.

"Now, O Clever Hasan," said the sheikh, "what you must do is go straight in, without looking left or right. If you turn this way or that, you're dead! Pick the pomegranates, put them in the saddlebags, and come right out!"

"Yes, sir!" said Clever Hasan, and he went straight in. He filled the saddlebags, adding three extra pomegranates for the sheikh, and came out. He gave the pomegranates to his mother, and she said to the giant, "You said he would die, but here he is back, just like a monkey!"

"I don't know how he could have done it," he replied. "No one has ever gone in there and come out alive."

"You've done well, son," she said to the lad. "You can go now. Allah bless you!"

The following day, the giant said, "Look here! There's a melon patch, and no one who goes into it ever comes out alive."

She did the same thing, dyeing her face with turmeric and lying in bed. "O my head!" she moaned.

"What's the matter, mother?"

"By Allah, son, I have a yearning for watermelons."

"That's easy, mother," he said. "Give me enough provisions to get there and back."

She gave him the provisions, and he ran, ran, until he arrived. Again he came upon a sheikh at the gate. "Peace to you, O uncle sheikh!"

"Had your salaam not come first," responded the sheikh, "I would have gobbled you up and licked the flesh off your bones! What do you want?"

"I want a watermelon from this patch," the lad announced.

"I've been sitting here for the last ten years, and I've never seen anyone who was able to bring out even one melon. Those who go in never come out."

"Allah's the final judge, for me as well as for them," said Hasan.

The sheikh said to him the same as the other had, "Go straight in. If you turn this way or that, you're dead!"

Going right in, the youth filled a sack with watermelons, taking three extra melons for the aged sheikh. Pulling himself together, he came out of there fast. A thousand followed him (In the name of Allah!) but they were not able to catch him. Carrying the melons with him, he brought them to his mother, thinking she would be happy.

"Yee!" complained the mother to the giant, "You said he would die, but here he is, back with melons just like a monkey!"

"What can I do?" asked the giant. "I don't know how he does it."

Taking the melons, the mother ate some and said to Hasan, "Thank you, son! May Allah reward you with Plenty!"

"Your last resort is to ask for the water of life," the giant said. "He'll never be able to bring the water of life! It'll take him at least seven days and seven nights just to get there."

"O my son, my darling! My finger is burned and it needs the water of life to make it well."

"Mother," he said, "prepare enough provisions to get me there and back."

Taking his provisions with him, Clever Hasan started on his way. He carried with him a razor, a pair of scissors, some cologne, scented soap, and clean clothes. When he reached the land of the ghoul, he greeted him, "Peace to you, uncle ghoul!"

"Welcome, Clever Hasan!" replied the ghoul. "Had your salaam not come first, I would have gobbled you up and licked the flesh off your bones!"

Coming down from his horse, the lad trimmed the ghoul's eyebrows, his beard, mustache, and hair; washed him with the scented soap; splashed him with cologne; and gave him fresh clothes to wear.

"May Allah give you pleasure, as you gave me," exclaimed the ghoul. "What can I do for you, Clever Hasan?"

"I want to fetch the water of life for my mother."

"Listen," said the ghoul, "I'm going to send you to my sister. She's a month older than me, but a whole age wiser. If you find her grinding sugar, with her b.r.e.a.s.t.s thrown back, approach her and suck at her right breast and then at her left. But if you find her grinding salt, with her eyes sparkling red, take care not to go near her!"

"Yes, sir? said Clever Hasan, and he went straight ahead. He found the ghouleh grinding sugar, with her b.r.e.a.s.t.s thrown back over her shoulders. When he had sucked at her right breast, she called out, "Who was it that sucked at my right breast? He's now dearer than my son 'Abd ir-Rahim." When he had sucked at her left breast, she asked, "Who was it that sucked at my left breast? He's become dearer than my son Abd ir-Rahman." She then said to him, "You've sucked at my b.r.e.a.s.t.s, so I can't possibly harm you. But my children are eleven ghouls, and if they see you, what're they going to do to you? What am I to do with you?"

Soon her children came home, and when she heard their voices she blew on him, turning him into a needle which she stuck into her dress. Her sons arrived.

"We smell a human being!" they announced.

"The human smell's in you and your trails," she answered.

"Impossible!" they insisted. "There's a human smell here!"

"Guarantee his safety!" she said.

"He's our brother in G.o.d's promise, and may Allah betray him who betrays this oath!"

She brought Hasan back as he was. "Welcome!" they said, hugging and kissing him. (Of course, he had 'now become their brother.) "Who among you will take Clever Hasan to bring the water of life?"

One of them said he needed ten days for the journey, and another said nine days, but the youngest said he could take him there and bring him back in seven minutes. Carrying Clever Hasan on his back, the ghoul flew with him.

"How big does the world look to you?" he asked.

"As big as a wheat sieve," replied Hasan.

"How big does the world look to you now?"

"As big as a flour sieve."

"And now?"

"As big as a piaster."

"That's it!" announced the ghoul," "We're there. Come down now. See that gate over there? You'll find the door leaning to the side. Set it back in place. Then you'll see dogs and horses. Take the meat away from the horses and put it in front of the dogs, and take the barley away from the dogs and give it to the horses. Take this empty pitcher with you and put it at the edge of the fountain. Bring back a full pitcher, and don't turn left or right. Come straight out and slam the door quickly when you leave!"