Wild Oats Part 10

_Jane._ Oh, bless me, ma'am! if it isn't--

_Enter_ ROVER, _dressed_.

_Rover._ "'Tis I, Hamlet the Dane!"--"Thus far into the bowels of the land, have we marched on."--"John, that b.l.o.o.d.y and devouring boar!"

_John._ He called me bull in the coach.

_Jane._ I don't know what brought such a bull in the coach.

_Rover._ This the Lady Amaranth! By Heavens, the very angel quaker!

_Lady Am._ [_Turns._] The dear, generous youth, my cousin Harry!

_John._ There he's for you, my lady, and make the most of him.

_Jane._ Oh, how happy my lady is! he looks so charming now he's fine.

_John._ Harkye! she's as rich as a Spanish Indiaman; and I tell you, your father wishes you'd grapple her by the heart--court her, you mad devil. [_Apart to_ ROVER.] There's an engagement to be between these two vessels: but little Cupid's the only man that's to take minutes, so come. [_To_ JANE.]

_Jane._ Ma'am, an't I to wait on you?

_John._ No, my la.s.s, you're to wait on me.

_Jane._ Wait on this great sea-bull! lack-a-daisy! am I--am--

_John._ By this, Sir George is come to the inn. Without letting the younker know, I'll go bring him here, and smuggle both father and son into a joyful meeting. [_Aside._]--[_To_ JANE.] Come now, usher me down like a lady.

_Jane._ This way, Mr. Sailor Gentleman. [_Exeunt_ JOHN _and_ JANE.

_Rover._ By Heavens, a most delectable woman! [_Aside._

_Lady Am._ Cousin, when I saw thee in the village free the sheep from the wolf, why didst not tell me then thou wert son to my uncle, Sir George?

_Rover._ Because, my lady, then I--did'nt know it myself--[_Aside._

_Lady Am._ Why wouldst vex thy father, and quit thy school.

_Rover._ "A truant disposition, good my lady, brought me from Wirtemberg."

_Lady Am._ Thy father designs thee for his dangerous profession; but is thy inclination turned to the voice of trumpets, and smites of mighty slaughter?

_Rover._ "Why, ma'am, as for old Boreas, my dad, when the blast of war blows in his ears, he's a tyger in his fierce resentment."--But for me, "I think it a pity, so it is, that villainous saltpetre should be digg'd out of the bowels of the harmless earth, which many a good tall fellow has destroyed, with wounds and guns, and drums, Heav'n save the mark!"

_Lady Am._ Indeed thou art tall, my cousin, and grown of comely stature.

Our families have long been separated.

_Rover._ They have--Since Adam, I believe--[_Aside._] "Then, lady, let that sweet bud of love now ripen to a beauteous flower?"

_Lady Am._ Love!

_Rover._ "Excellent wench! perdition catch my soul, but I do love thee, and when I love thee not, chaos is come again."

_Lady Am._ Thou art of an happy disposition.

_Rover._ "If I were now to die, 'twere now to be most happy." "Let our senses dance in concert to the joyful minutes, and this, and this, the only discord make." [_Embracing._

_Enter_ JANE, _with cake and wine_.

_Jane._ Ma'am, an't please you, Mr. Zachariah bid me----

_Rover._ "Why, you fancy yourself Cardinal Wolsey in this family."

_Jane._ No, sir, I'm not Cardinal Wolsey, I'm only my lady's maid here--Jenny Gammon, at your service.

_Rover._ "A bowl of cream for your Catholic majesty."

_Jane._ Cream! No, sir, it's wine and water.

_Rover._ "You get no water, take the wine, great potentate."-- [_Gives Lady_ AMARANTH _a gla.s.s, then drinks_.]

_Jane._ Madam, my father begs leave--

_Rover._ "Go, go, thou shallow Pomona."--[_Puts her out._] Eh! Zounds, here's my manager.

_Enter_ FARMER GAMMON _and_ LAMP.

_F. Gam._ I hope her ladys.h.i.+p hasn't found out 'twas I had Banks arrested. [_Aside._]--Would your ladys.h.i.+p give leave for this here honest man and his comrades to act a few plays in the town, 'cause I've let'n my barn. 'Twill be some little help to me, my lady.

_Rover._ My lady, I understand these affairs. Leave me to settle 'em.

_Lady Am._ True; these are delusions, as a woman, I understand not.

But by my cousin's advice I will abide; ask his permission.

_Gam._ So; I must pay my respects to the young squire. [_Aside._] An't please your honour, if a poor man like me [_Bows._] durst offer my humble duty.--

_Rover._ Canst thou bow to a vagrant. Eh, Little Hospitality?

[FARMER GAMMON _looks in his face, and sneaks off_.

_Lamp._ Please your honour, if I may presume to hope you'll be graciously pleased to take our little squad under your honour's protection--

_Rover._ Ha!

_Lady Am._ What say'st thou, Henry?

_Rover._ Ay, where's Henry? Gadso! True, that's me. Strange I should already forget my name, and not half an hour since I was christened!

[_Aside._] Harkye! do you play yourself? Eh! Ha! Hem! [_Vapouring._]

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