My Blood Approves: Fate Part 30

"Alice, what have you done?" Peter repeated plaintively, and I had never seen anyone look as tortured as he did then. He ran a hand through his hair, and he looked as if he might be sick.

"Peter. I didn't..." I tried to sit up, but this overwhelming dizziness forced me back down.

The exhaustion I felt before came back in tenfold. A couple days ago, I had lost several pints of blood, and even though Peter hadn't taken very much himself, I could barely handle what I had already lost. I was trying to think, to reason with him, but my mind was suffocating. The lack of blood and that haze that Peter put on everything were too much. I closed my eyes, meaning to clear my head for a minute, but when I opened them, Peter was gone.

I knew I should get up and call Jack or Milo or somebody. I had to warn them that Peter was back, and he knew what was going on. I wanted to move, but it was far too much work. There was a myriad of things going on inside of me, and I couldn't get a handle on any of them. Nothing seemed to be working, and the best I could manage was reaching out for the phone my night stand.

Chapter 21.

Something was shaking me so hard, I thought I would get whiplash. My body was flopping back and forth, and hands were painfully gripping my shoulders. I tried pus.h.i.+ng them off, but I could barely even raise my arms. There was a voice screaming my name shrilly, and I realized belatedly that it was my mother.

"Mom! Mom!" I shouted, swatting at her wrist the best I could, and the shaking finally stopped.

"Alice? What the h.e.l.l is going on with you?" Mom demanded, looking at me with wild eyes.

She sat on my bed, holding my shoulders, otherwise I probably would've fallen back onto the bed.

There was bright sunlight streaming in through the curtains, and not only was my mother actually home, she was in my room. I was trying to figure out what could possibly happening, but my body was just trying to fall back to sleep.

"What are you talking about? What are you doing in here?" I mumbled groggily, and when I tried to push my hair out of my eyes, I poked myself in the eye. I sort of felt like a drunk person when I tried to move.

"I just got home. It's ten o'clock in the morning, and your alarm clock was going off, as it had been for the last three hours. You didn't hear it? At all?" Mom was looking at me, trying to figure out if I 155 was high or drunk or just sick. "When I came in here, I turned off your alarm, and you just laid there. I thought you were dead."

"I'm not dead. I'm just tired." I tried to shake her off, but she wasn't letting go so easily. "I'm fine.

Really."

"You slept through an alarm clock and you didn't wake up until I shook the h.e.l.l out of you! You are not fine!" Her grip on me softened though, and she pushed the hair of my eyes, probably so she could get a better look and see if they were bloodshot or dilated. "Alice, are you on drugs?"

"No, Mom," I batted her hand away, and she finally let go of me so I could lay back down. "I'm just tired. I think I'm sick. Like I have mono or something."

"Mono? What boys have you been kissing?" Her voice got shriller and higher, and I tried to bury my head in my pillow to block out the sound. "Is this that Jack boy? Did he get you sick? Is he giving you drugs?

"No, Mom, no drugs!" The mention of Jack picked at something in the back of my mind, but I couldn't exactly figure out what it was. "Just go away and let me get some sleep! I'll talk about this later!"

"You're just skipping school today?" Mom asked me incredulously.

"Guess so. I'm sick! Now leave me alone!" I hit at the air above my head, trying to shoo her away.

"If you're not up by this afternoon, I'm taking you to the doctors," Mom relented and stood up.

"And I'm having them test you for every drug known to man. Is that clear?"

"Crystal," I muttered into my pillow.

Once she left, I rolled over and tried to clear the fog from my head. I really, really wanted to go back to sleep, but I figured that was just because of the counteractive effect the Red Bull had had on my system. I had forced myself to do too much yesterday, and my body had completely shut down as a result of it.

Something about Jack was making my heart panic, but I couldn't put my finger on it. He hadn't talked to me yesterday, and then I had gone to bed, and then... And then Peter. I touched at my neck, feeling for bite marks, but there weren't any, not that that really meant anything.

Very little of last night remained clear to me. Just Peter's green eyes and the strange fog in my room. But there couldn't be fog in my room. That's not even possible. And he had spit my blood on my floor. Mom would've freaked out if she saw the floor covered in blood. I rolled over, checking the floor just to be sure, but other than a few pieces of dirty clothing, it was clean.

I laid back down and touched my neck again. What had happened last night? My had still felt fuzzy.

Maybe... maybe it had just been a dream. As tired as I had been lately, it didn't seem likely that I would wake up to any noise. Besides that, Peter and Ezra moved in almost total silence. I doubted I'd even be able to hear them come in.. It was probably just a bad dream as a result of my own obsessive paranoia, my exhaustion, and too much caffeine all rolled up together.

Just be completely safe, I decided to call Milo anyway. If Peter was in town, it wouldn't hurt to give them heads up, and if he wasn't, it would give me a piece of mind. Milo didn't answer when I called, but that was actually rea.s.suring. If Peter had stopped by, they'd probably all be awake. In fact, they'd probably have called me or come to get me to make sure I was safe. But Milo not answering meant that he was still sleeping, and everything was okay.

156.

"Hey, Milo, it's just me," I tiredly told his voicemail. "I just had the weirdest dream and I wanted to make sure you all were okay and what not. Just give me a call later, okay? Okay. Bye."

I flipped the phone shut and made sure to set the ringer on loud, just in case there was trouble and they needed to get a hold of me. In the meantime, I was tired as h.e.l.l, and I just wanted to get back to sleep. Pulling the blankets over me, I snuggled deeper into the bed and pa.s.sed out.

I forced myself out of bed at seven o'clock, before my mother went to work, to prove to her that I was still alive and okay. I was feeling better, but not as good as I pretended to be. Once she left, I took the pills Mae had given me, then downed another Red Bull, and crashed on the couch. While I hadn't the best experience with too much caffeine last night, I figured that a little could probably help take the edge off the fatigue. At least I was too tired to really feel nervous or anxious, so that was something.

Milo came over, disrupting my plans to just fall back to sleep on the couch. I sat up and marveled over the back of the couch at him. He looked amazing, as usual, so it was safe to a.s.sume that n.o.body had attacked him in the night. Leaning on the back of the couch, he gave me a curious look.

"You look like h.e.l.l," Milo commented, and that was probably true.

I'd pretty much been sleeping the last couple days, or I was busy being a nervous wreck. The last time I showered was before school yesterday, and I hadn't brushed my hair in just as long. My skin was ashen, even for me, and I hadn't eaten or changed out of my pajamas since the day before. So yeah, I'm pretty sure I looked terrible. I felt terrible.

"Thanks," I replied offhandedly. "So what brings you to my neck of the woods?"

"I came to check on you." He pushed some of my hair out of my face, and I suspected he'd been spending too much time with Mae. That would explain his visitation. "You sounded weird on the phone, and Mae thought I should see how you're recovering. Did you go to school today?"

"I overslept," I shrugged.

"Alice, you need to stay on track for graduation," Milo chided.

"Oh, like you are?" I briefly considered sticking out my tongue but decided against it.

I flopped back on the couch, but his expression only got more disapproving. Too bad. He only wanted what was best for me, and right now, what was best for me was lying down and resting, not worrying about school. Graduation seemed pointless, even if I didn't inherit a fortune from Jack's family like Milo had. I still didn't really have any plans for the future.

"Have you eaten today?" Milo smartly changed the subject. He glanced over at the kitchen, which was devoid of dirty dishes or any other relics of eating, aside from several empty Red Bull cans.

"Hey. You stopped recycling since I moved out."

"You're not here to make the rules anymore." Most of the time, I was lucky if I remembered to take the garbage out, let alone sort and recycle.

"So? Doesn't the state of the world seem a little more prudent to you now that you'll be living forever?"

Milo walked into the kitchen to start sorting out the aluminum cans and empty cardboard box from the Fruity Pebbles I had finished off the other day.

157.

"As of right now, I'll be lucky if I make it to next year, let alone forever," I sighed.

"You're so melodramatic," Milo scoffed. I couldn't see him, but I heard him puttering around in the kitchen, and my stomach grumbled. I was like Pavlov's dog. The sound of Milo with cookware made me salivate.

"Are you making me something?" I poked my head over the top of the couch again to see what he was up to.

"Yeah. Mae said you need some red meat." He was rooting through the freezer, looking for some of the groceries he'd recently bought me. "Listen. Why don't you go take a shower and get yourself cleaned up, and I'll make you supper. Sound good?"

"You know, it's so silly," I said as I got up off the couch. "I was staying human so I could stay around and take care of you."

He laughed, but it was pretty dumb. Milo had always been taking care of me. What exactly had I been sticking around to do for me? Really, I was just going to keep him company. I should've just gotten him a puppy, and let Jack turn me. If I had done that, I wouldn't be so d.a.m.n tired right now, and I wouldn't be on the brink of losing everything.

The bathroom smelled of flowers and cleanliness after my shower, but when I opened the door, all I could smell was delicious. The shower had given me a little burst of energy, so my stomach was even hungrier than it had been before. Milo had made me steak, and it was so rare, I was a little shocked it wasn't mooing. He already made me a plate, perfectly set up with spinach, and some kind of rice. As an added bonus, he'd place a single pink rose in a vase in the center of the table.

"This looks fantastic, Milo!" I gushed as I took my place at the table. "Where'd you get the flower?"

"I have my ways," he smiled cryptically, and I decided to leave it at that. I was too hungry to worry about frivolous mysteries. "You look like you're feeling better."

"I am," I admitted through a mouthful of food. He sat down across the table from me, watching me wolf down my food, and I couldn't help but feel self-conscious. "Its weird eating when you're not."

"I don't think you'd have much of an appet.i.te if I was eating right now." He was trying to make a joke, but there was a hint of shame in his eyes. He hadn't forgotten my reaction to watching him bite Jane, and frankly, neither had I.

"Thank you. For this," I quickly changed the subject. "It's really good."

"Anytime." He leaned on the table, propping up his head on his hand. "So. What was your dream about?"

"Peter, of all things." I furrowed my brows in disgust. "Isn't that strange?"

"Not really. You've been worrying about him since Jack bit you. It's only logical that it would manifest itself in your dreams." Milo sounded so matter-of-fact, and it made me feel relieved.

In the back of my mind, I hadn't been entirely certain that Peter biting me had been a dream, but I couldn't see any other explanation for it. The way Milo said it, it sounded like the only conclusion I could come to. Obviously, all my thinking and worrying about him had come out that way. It didn't mean anything except that I was paranoid.

"Yeah, you're right," I nodded.

158.

"Has Jane said anything to you?" Milo asked carefully. "Have you even seen her in school?"

"Yes, and yes." I chewed the last part of my steak and swallowed hard, then settled back in my seat.

"She knows you guys are vampires. Well, at least you and Jack, and Lucian and Violet. I don't really know how she's taking it. She hasn't really talked to me since."

"Hmm." He looked down at the table, thinking something over.

"What?"

"Nothing. I just hope she does okay with everything," Milo looked back up at me and smiled.

"Knowing her, she'll probably just solve the problem with s.e.x and drinking, and forget that it even happened."

"That is probably her plan," I agreed.

Whenever I had seen at her school, she acted like her same old self. She was always flirting with a guy, or strutting somewhere and glaring at me. After a couple weekends getting blacked out drunk, she'd probably kill any brain cells that remembered vampires. They were in the clear.

"On the subject of how people take things..." I s.h.i.+fted uncomfortably, surprised that I was getting nervous just broaching the subject of Jack. "How is Jack doing?"

"He's been kind of... stand-offish lately," Milo answered carefully. "I think he's really been beating himself up over what happened."

"Regrets are always a fun thing." I looked down at my mostly empty plate, pus.h.i.+ng around a few piece of rice stuck to it.

There was a lump growing in my throat. I knew that he regretted it the second after it was over, and it killed. No matter his reasoning for it, there's nothing more painful that knowing the most meaningful thing I had ever felt was just another regret to the person I shared it with.

"Alice, you know he just doesn't want you to get hurt," Milo told me gently.

"Everyone keeps saying that don't want to hurt me. It's just so funny that the only way they can succeed in not hurting me is by hurting me." I stood up and took my plate to the sink.

"Nothing is that cut and dried. At least not when you're dealing with vampires."

"Thanks for making me supper and everything, but I need to get some rest if I have any hope of going to school tomorrow." I leaned against the kitchen sink, purposely not looking at him. I felt like crying, and I wanted to just stop thinking about all this stuff and go back to bed. It would be so much easier that way.

"I know you're just trying to politely get rid of me, but you're right anyway." Milo stood up, and I felt him hesitating before he left. He was trying to think of something to make me feel better, but even he fell short for a change. "Call me if you need anything. Okay?"

"Will do."

Once he left, I started crying, and I didn't appreciate it. I didn't like how it felt being alone in the 159 apartment all the time, and I wished that I hadn't asked him to leave. It was just because I didn't want him to see me cry or know how upset I really was, but I don't know why it mattered if he saw it. Milo saw everything.

My solution was going to bed. The only cure for being sad and tired was rest and time, and sleeping accomplished both of those. Thankfully, I managed to wake up to my alarm the next day, and I blundered through another day at school. Jane glared at me in the halls, the teachers ignored me, and I slept in cla.s.s when I had the chance. After school, Milo text messaged to check on me, but I heard nothing from Jack, and my lack of invitation to their house continued. When I went to bed that night at 8:30, I tried to pretend that my life wasn't so bad. That this was good enough for me.

Chapter 22.

Unfortunately, I woke up the next morning feeling better. That doesn't sound like a bad thing, but I was kind of hoping that I would just sleep through the rest of my life, and then maybe, I wouldn't notice how much it sucked. My body had finally decided to respond to all the rest and pills I had been popping, and while I wasn't exactly energetic, I felt much more like a normal human being.

It was a Sat.u.r.day, but I woke up at ten in the morning, which felt much too early to me. Still, with my recent almost-burst-of-energy, I decided to put it to good use. Blasting out the radio, I went about the house, picking up the mess I had somehow managed to leave everywhere even though I had been mostly immobile.

Whenever I had done anything over the last few days, I had just thrown it aside, so there clothes and pop cans everywhere. I'm a little surprised that Mom hadn't busted down my door and threatened to evict me.

I scrubbed the kitchen floors. I went over the tiles in the bathroom with an old toothbrush to get the mildew. I reorganized my CD collection. I even went into Milo's room and tried to straighten up what was left of his things. The stuff he had left here didn't really matter anymore, at least not to him, but I couldn't exactly throw it away either. Mom thought he was still coming home, and it would be suspicious if I got rid of all of his earthly possessions.