Away. Part 5

In ten years, nothing about this place had changed. There was still the smell of baking bread and tomato sauce wafting through the door. The small salad bar was still in the corner, the grapevine wallpaper hadn't been replaced, and it still only had thirteen tables. Even the coloring I had done as a child was still hanging above me and Jack's "regular table." But even at the same time as it hadn't changed, it was completely different. This wasn't home anymore. Even though I had been here hundreds of times, I might as well have never been here at all. Not after what had happened today.

The only people in here are Jack and I. It's so late at night that they're an hour away from closing. I see a waitress grabbing menus and silverware as we sit down in the same seats we always used to. Jack and I didn't even have to ask each other. We just did it.

"What can I get you to start off with?" the waitress asks, glancing back and forth to both of us. This is the same woman that used to wait on us ten years ago. All of it is making my head spin. "Just water," I tell her.

"I'll have coffee, Dolly," Jack says, taking the menu from her lightly.

The woman's face becomes confused. "Wait a minute..." she peers at my father's face, then lights up. "Jack McGowan, is that you?"

"It sure is!" Jack says, laughing. He shakes her hand and she turns to me. "And beautiful Rosemary? The last time I saw you, you were no taller than my hip!"

Jack glances my way, and I know it's time to act. "It's me," I chuckle nervously. "Just out for dinner with...dad. We haven't been here in forever."

"Then I'm guessing you're gonna be wanting your usual, right?" she asks, holding up a notepad.

What was my usual? I have no idea. "Uh...give me a minute to look over the menu," I said, holding it up fairly. I bury my nose in its pockets but cannot stand to read over the sound of my father and Dolly gossiping and catching up on the times.

"What brings you back around here?" Dolly asks.

"Oh, you know. Rosemary just decided to come visit, and we were in the area so we figured why not stop in," Jack smiles.

The lines on the page are so blurry I'm wondering if I need gla.s.ses. Shutting the menu with a snap, I stand up. The conversation halts and both look at me. Forcing out a laugh, I smile at them and say, "The usual sounds great. I've got to go to the bathroom, sorry..."

I walk as fast as I can away from the table and into the one room bathroom. Locking the door, I sit on the toilet and begin rocking back and forth, my hands in my hair. I can't do this. Smile at the waitress and act like nothing's wrong, act like I was out for a visit with dear old dad. How did I expect myself to sit another half hour at the dining table, when freedom was no more than a few words away?

"Rosemary? You alright in there honey?" Jack asks as he pounds on the door.

Gasping for air, I squeeze out, "Yes Dad! I'm just not feeling well...I think it's because I'm hungry!"

"Well we've come to the right place then," he chuckles. "Don't take too long, food'll be out soon!"

I stand up. I have an idea. When we go to say goodbye after the meal I'll hug Dolly, and then whisper to her that I'm in trouble. It'll be so natural that Jack won't even notice. Then she can notify the police, and they'll find us in no time. I wash my face and fix my hair. I have to appear as normal as possible, so Dolly doesn't think me insane. I plaster a smile on my face and step out of the bathroom.

I can't do this, I think as I see Jack smiling at me from the table, giving me a friendly wave as I draw closer and closer. I'm about to have dinner with my kidnapper of a father. This is insane.

Dolly comes out to refill Jack's drink and she's smiling at me as she does so. She has no idea what's going on, even now. I can't do this, I think once again, but as soon as I do so I hear another voice whisper beside me, Yes you can. Noah's watching out for me, staying by my side. I need him to give me strength, to get me through the rest of this. Pretending he's right beside me dissolves some of my fear. Noah would never let anything bad happen to me. I sit down and force myself to be still as I look at the tablecloth, the paintings on the wall, anything so long as it isn't my father.

"You took a long time in there. Are you feeling well?" he asks me, pretending to be concerned. It's not enough to fool me. I laugh and say, "I don't know, how would you feel if a crazed maniac captured you for no good reason other than he wants to be selfish?"

"None of that here," he says, and he actually looks nervous. "Just please have dinner with me. We don't want to cause a scene that we have to clean up."

Clean up? A frightening thought crosses my mind. Would he actually hurt Dolly, to prevent my escape? Is that why he had the gun? Did he even have the gall to use it? "You wouldn't," I say.

"I would do anything for my daughter," he says. He goes to reach for my hand but I sharply jerk it back. He looks hurt, but I don't give a d.a.m.n. I want to hurt him as much as he has hurt me.

"If you would do anything for me you would've spent time with me when I was growing up, not kidnap me when I'm a full grown woman," I spit at him. "You had no time for me all these years, and all of a sudden you want to get to know me."

"You don't understand," he says. "Your mother kept me away from you. I tried everything I could to see you, but she turned the police against me."

"So you capture me instead of trying to contact me yourself? You're ridiculous."

"I admit that these are extreme measures-"

"Extreme? You're a lunatic!" I shout.

He sharply hisses at me and says, "Quiet! I don't want to leave here!"

"Why shouldn't I be loud?" I say, and I raise my voice, hoping someone in the kitchen will hear me and get the message. "Why shouldn't I?"

"Rosemary," he says as a warning, and he opens his coat just slightly enough so I can see the handle of the gun. I bite my tongue, forcing my voice to go lower as I say, "You lost your chance a long time ago, and after what you've done I'm not giving you another one. Not now, not ever."

"Here you are!" the happy voice of Dolly sings over us as she puts down a hamburger for Jack and what looks like ravioli for me. A familiar smell reaches my nostrils and I remember...spinach cheese ravioli, my favorite pastime dish here at Frank's Town.

"Can I get you anything else?" Dolly asks cheerfully.

A phone, the police, maybe a kitchen knife so I can get out of this myself, I think, but I force myself to stay silent as Jack says, "We're good. That'll be all we need."

"Well you just holler if you're in need of help," she says as she begins to walk away. I look down at my dinner and my stomach lurches. I haven't eaten in over twenty four hours. I know I'm starving. But even as I go to pick up my fork my stomach wriggles and flips. I feel nauseous and hungry at the same time. Jack looks at me expectantly and asks, "Are you going to eat?"

I pick up a fork and cut into one lightly, putting bits into my mouth slowly. Jack begins devouring his meal and I stare at him, watching the carnage and feeling quite like that hamburger at the moment.

"So tell me this," I ask, barely done with one ravioli as he's more than halfway through his meal, "How exactly did my mother keep me away from you? You had visits with me all the time when I was little."

"I did, and I always enjoyed them. They were the highlight of my week," he says.

"Yeah. And you know what? You stopped coming." I put down my fork and glare at him. "There were times I waited and waited and waited for hours, for you to show up and you never did. I was a little girl and you abandoned me I don't know how many times. But now all of a sudden I'm so important to you."

"When you started getting older your mother didn't think it was right for us to a.s.sociate," he says. "She thinks because of my...problems...that I'm not a good influence. She'd rearrange the dates for us to visit and then tell me the wrong times so I couldn't see you. I never missed a day, Rosemary. I think your mother kept us both waiting."

"My mother would never do that," I say, shaking my head. "You're making it all up."

"I know you don't want to hear this about her. I know. But it is true, and you have to believe it eventually. When I figured out what she was doing, I tried going to the courthouse. That was when she had a doctor come to examine me, determine I was too unstable to be around you. Like it wasn't safe." He scoffs. "The safest place in the world is with me."

"Okay, whatever, keep lying." I roll my eyes as he takes a sip of his drink. "You're just doing this because you want revenge on my mother," I say. "That's all you want. You two were always too busy taking things out on each other to ever consider me."

He slams the gla.s.s down on the table, slos.h.i.+ng liquid everywhere. "I did not use you as a tool, Rosemary! You mean more to me than to settle a grudge match!"

"I was always the favorite weapon, for both of you," I snap. "You'd both use me to try and get leverage over the other. Well, I'm sorry, but I'm a big girl now and I don't let people play with me like that anymore."

"You need to calm down," he says slowly.

"You need to let me go," I say, narrowing my eyes.

"You're staying with me until you learn the truth," he says, and he pushes his empty plate away. "I didn't take you from your home to keep you prisoner. I took you because you need to know everything, not be sheltered by it from your mother. Once you know the truth you can stay, go back to Lousdale, whatever you like. But until you know what really happened between your mother and I, I'm not letting you leave."

"Well then tell me, so I can go," I say.

"You won't listen," he says. "When you're ready to listen, I'll tell you."

"Liar," I whisper, loud enough so he can hear it. Dolly returns to our table, a frigid stone wall. She nervously glances at both of us as she takes our plates away, looking at my nearly full one and asking, "Did something not taste right with your food?"

I've barely eaten, but I can't force down anymore. "I'm not feeling too well," I say. "But it was really good." I go to give her my silverware and she glances down at my wrists, exclaiming, "Oh dear, what's wrong with your arms?"

I look down. The handcuffs have started to press into my skin, grazing away at the upper layer and giving me red rings around my veins. Jack's eyes meet mine and without even thinking about it I say, "It's from hairbands. I wear them around my wrist when I sleep because I forget to take them off."

"That's a bad habit, dear," she says. "Remember next time to take them off for me, alright?" She walks away once more and Jack goes up to pay the bill, giving me a slight smile as he does so. My mind whirls. Why did I just lie to her? I had a chance to escape. Why didn't I take it?

"Time to go," Jack says, putting a hand on my shoulder. I rise up from my chair and as I walk to the exit door Dolly waves goodbye to me, cleaning up our table. I open my mouth, a small cry coming out of it, but Jack tightens his grip on my shoulder and I fall silent. In the parking lot, all that can be heard is the sound of a barking dog.

"You seemed pretty nervous there," I say, trying to unnerve him even more. "Are you that afraid of me getting away?"

"No. I just wanted to make sure you didn't do anything stupid. I know you. You wouldn't do that to me," he says.

"You're wrong," I say, trying to shake off his grip. His hand doesn't move.

"If you really wanted to leave me you wouldn't have lied there," he tells me.

"I lied because I don't trust you not to hurt Dolly," I say, and my stomach wiggles once again. "She's been a friend to you all these years, and I don't doubt you'd put a bullet in her back."

"Do you really think I'm that sort of person?" he asks.

I look him dead in the eyes. "After everything you've done to me, I wouldn't put it past you." I get in the car and put my seatbelt on, ignoring him as he refastens the handcuffs to my wrists. As we start driving again my stomach does more flip flops and turns, and I hope that if I have to throw up it's all over him and his car. I breathe deeply, trying to calm my stomach. What exactly was this big secret that Jack was so intent on telling me? And why couldn't he just let me know? It wasn't like it was going to change anything.

No matter what, I would still hate him.

Chapter Five.

The restaurant is closing. I run up as a cook is closing the door, putting a hand on the side of it as he pulls it shut. "Wait, hold on! I need to ask you something."

"We're closed. Sorry, you're going to have to come back tomorrow," he says, and he tries to close the door on me but I resist him.

"There's no time! Please, really quickly!" My eyes beg him.

He sighs. "What is it?"

"Did a man and a young woman come in here to eat recently within the past few hours?"

"Tons of people come through here everyday. I can't remember each one," he argues.

"This is important! She would be around my age, reddish brown hair past her shoulders, around five feet tall."

"Rosemary McGowan," I hear a voice say, and I peer behind the cook to see a middle-aged woman looking at me curiously. "Is that who you're looking for?"

"Yes," I say. "She's my girlfriend. Was she alone?"

"Your name?" she asks, raising an eyebrow.

"Noah Cash. Was she alone?" I repeat.

"Dolly Parkings. And no, she was with her father," the woman says.

"Do you happen to know where they were going?" I say.

"Why do you want to know? Jack McGowan and his daughter have been coming in here for years," she tells me.

"It's very important. Jack's kidnapped her," I say, and both her and the cook's eyes widen.

"What do you mean, kidnapped?" the cook mutters, glancing from me to Dolly.

"Just what I said. Please, you have to listen. Think about it; Rosemary hasn't been with Jack here in years. Why would they suddenly show up now?"

"I figured since she was overage now, she had the right to see her father when she pleased." Dolly shakes her head. "Out of all the things Jack McGowan would do, I don't think kidnapping's one of them. Are you positive that he took her?"

"I saw it happen," I insist. "She didn't try to run, get help?"

"She said nothing to me," Dolly says. "I think you're wrong about the whole thing."

I sigh in irritation. This was getting nowhere. I lift up my s.h.i.+rt to show her all of my bruises, and she gasps. "Here. This doesn't prove much, but this is where I flew off my bike from when Jack hit me with his car when I was trying to save her. You have to help me find her. If you know anything, please, tell me."

Dolly glances outside quickly, and then motions for the cook to open the door. "Come inside," she says. I do so and the cook quickly locks the door behind me, and Dolly shuffles over to a table, plopping herself down in exhaustion. The cook looks at us and says, "I'm going to finish locking up, Dolly. Are you sure you're going to be okay alone?" He glances at me.

"I'll be fine. A lot has happened to this old bird." She waves him off and he walks away warily, glancing at me over his shoulder as he pa.s.ses through the kitchen door.

"Jack McGowan, kidnapping..." Dolly takes a long breath. "I don't know whether to believe you. But I have to admit that Rosemary was acting a little funny when she was here. She was in the bathroom for ages and she didn't eat much. I just thought she wasn't feeling well."

"Did Jack mention where they were headed next?" I ask.

"When Rosemary was in the bathroom Jack told me they were going to drive for awhile, and Jack told me he was going to look for a hotel nearby, but he didn't say which one."

"Thank you," I say. Wavering, I try to make my way towards the door, my legs feeling like watery jello. I'm so d.a.m.n tired.

"Now wait a minute, where do you think you're going?" Dolly asks, rus.h.i.+ng forward and grabbing my arm.

"I'm about to go search every hotel around." I suppress a large yawn.

"Not like that you're not. When was the last time you got any rest or food?" she looks at me in concern.

"Last night...I think." I put a hand on the wall to steady myself.

"You can't go around driving like that," Dolly grabs my arm. "I live on the apartment above here. I'll make you a quick bite and you can sleep on my couch."