Golden Stories Part 35
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The policeman clapped his hands a second time, and then with shrill indignation the creature flew down from the tree, and set off in the direction of the distant moors.
The proceedings promptly a.s.sumed the aspect of a hunt. The c.o.c.k ran along with outstretched wings and neck, and the policeman and the crowd ran after it. At last it reached a small cottage, belonging to a widow of the name of Gammer. Exerting a final effort, it flew up toward her open window and ensconced itself on the top of the good woman's tester-bed.
Now Mrs. Gammer was a woman of character. She heard the noise outside; and when the breathless policeman arrived at the door of her kitchen, she was wiping the soapsuds off her plump red arms, ready for any dispute or fray. She stood with her arms held akimbo, as the man in blue explained his errand. When he had finished his recital she looked at him defiantly.
"And I should like to know what you call yourself, policeman or no policeman, to be chasing a poor harmless critter across 'em blazing commons on a day like this! You want to go and poke him down from my tester-bed, do you? Well, you can just go back and tell the magistrates as Mrs. Gammer's got him, and if they want him they must come for him themselves."
This was direct defiance of the law, and the policeman commenced a remonstrance. His remarks were, however, cut short by Mrs. Gammer.
"I have always said as magistrates was as ignorant as babies, and I only wish that they was as harmless," she persisted, in open contempt of the government of her country. "You can go back, and tell 'em as Mrs. Gammer says so. My house is my house, magistrate or no magistrate, and I won't have any policeman messing about on the top of my tester-bed."
The policeman was not certain whether the authority which had been entrusted to him in the matter would justify his making a deliberate prisoner of Mrs. Gammer. And, as she showed every sign of resorting to violence, should he attempt to pa.s.s the door, which she barred with her stout figure, he decided upon beating a retreat. He went outside again and rea.s.serted his shattered dignity by once more driving away the crowd; then, not knowing what else to do, he returned to the police station and reported the matter to the chief constable.
The chief laughed, and so did everybody else who heard the story. The policeman was directed to return to Mrs. Gammer's cottage later in the day, and serve her with an order requiring her to give up the c.o.c.k immediately. But when he handed Mrs. Gammer the official paper, she laughed in his face.
"You can look round the house for the c.o.c.k now if you like," she said contemptuously, slapping down the order upon the table, "and you can see if you can find him."
"Is he still on the top of your tester-bed?" demanded the policeman.
"Go and look," responded Mrs. Gammer, with a snort. "You can take the turk's-head brush and brush him down!"
So, armed with the turk's-head brush, the policeman ascended Mrs.
Gammer's small, steep staircase. When he reached her bedroom, he poked into every cranny and corner with the handle of his brush. But no c.o.c.k was to be found.
He descended the stairs, and stood again in the little kitchen. A savory smell of cooking arose from a stew-pan on the fire.
"Where's the critter gone to?" he demanded.
"How should I know?" replied Mrs. Gammer testily.
The policeman, still standing in the kitchen, wished that Mrs. Gammer would give him an invitation to supper. The widow glanced up sharply at him and saw what was in his mind.
"You'd like some supper, I make no doubt, after your wild-goose chase,"
she said. "Sit down at t' table and take a bit o' stew."
The policeman seated himself with alacrity. The stew which Mrs. Gammer placed before him consisted of a mixture of barley, onions and some white meat. He ate a hearty supper, and when he stood up he drew his hands across his mouth.
"Thank you kindly," he said. "I must be off now, and see where that c.o.c.k has gone to."
Then it was that Mrs. Gammer gave a short and derisive laugh. She began to pile up the empty plates and to put the spoons and forks in the basin by the sink.
"If you go a-chasing of that c.o.c.k until you are black and blue in the face," she said, "you'll never find him. And the reason why, is that you have just helped to eat him up."
"I have eat him up!" he gasped.
"Aye," responded Mrs. Gammer, with brevity. "I made him into soup!"
The policeman remained open-mouthed, staring at the impenitent widow.
"You'd no business ever to do such a thing," he said. "The c.o.c.k belonged to the Law."
"I care nowt for your Law," retorted Mrs. Gammer. "Anyway you've helped to eat him!"
A vague sense of cannibalism was haunting the policeman's mind; he felt almost as dismayed as if he had made a hearty supper off the magistrate's clerk himself.
"You're a very wicked woman," he said to Mrs. Gammer. "And--and----"
He broke off, entirely nonplussed by the situation in which he found himself. Mrs. Gammer continued to wash up the spoons and forks with utter indifference to his consternation.
"The c.o.c.k's eat up, and there's an end of it," she said. "You'd best go and tell the magistrates all about it."
Sheepish and disconcerted, the policeman slunk home. The next morning the chief asked him if he had served the order on Mrs. Gammer.
"I--served it," said he, scratching his head.
"And did you get the bird given up?" demanded his superior officer.
"No, I can't say as I did," replied the policeman.
"Was it still on the top of the tester-bed?" pursued his awkward questioner.
"No. It was not on the tester-bed," replied the policeman.
"Then where was it?" insisted the chief.
For several seconds the policeman was silent, then he told a lie.
"I canna say," he answered, "it war gone."
The chief shrugged his shoulders, and sent the man about the business of the day. The next time that the magistrates met, the question of Bob O'
Tims's c.o.c.k was again brought into court. The magistrate's clerk demanded if the case were settled.
To the great relief of the policeman, who was waiting in attendance, Bob O' Tims spoke up from the spot where he stood.
"Jim hadna stolen my c.o.c.k after all, sir," he said, "for it came home the next morning."
"Then what happened to the c.o.c.k that was brought into court on Tuesday?"
demanded the magistrate's clerk. But n.o.body seemed to know.
Only, people used to wonder why Widow Gammer almost always gave a peculiar kind of snort when she spoke of Police Constable X, and why that worthy officer avoided her cottage ever after, and invariably turned down a side street if he saw the widow within speaking distance of him.
VI
PRISONERS IN THE TOWER
Golden Stories Part 35
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Golden Stories Part 35 summary
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