Hills of the Shatemuc Part 146

Karen stopped her song and looked round.

"Do you mean all that you are singing, Karen?"

"What I'm singing? --"

"Yes. I've been listening to you. -- Do you feel and mean all those words of your hymn?"

"I don't say no words I don't mean," said Karen, going on with her work; -- "anyhow, I don't mean to."

"But those words you have been singing -- do you mean that you feel them all?"

Karen stood up and faced her as she answered,

"Yes!"

"Do you mean that you would rather die than live?"

"If 'twas the Lord's will, I would," said Karen, without moving her face.

"Why?"

Karen looked at her still, but her face unbent in a little bit of a smile.

"You ain't one of the Lord's people, be you, young lady?"

"I don't know --" said Elizabeth, blus.h.i.+ng and hesitating, -- "I mean to be."

"Do you mean to be one of 'em?" said Karen.

"I wish to be -- yes, I mean to be, -- if I can."

The old woman dried her hand which had been busy in water, and coming up took one of Elizabeth's, -- looked at its delicate tints in her own wrinkled and black fingers, and then lifting a moistened eye to Elizabeth's face, she answered expressively,

"_Then_ you'll know."

"But I want to know something about it now," said the young lady as Karen went back to her work. "Tell me. How can you wish to 'leave all for heaven,' as you were singing a moment ago?"

"I'd ha' done that plenty o' years ago," said Karen. "I'd got enough of this world by that time."

"Is that the reason?"

"What reason?" said Karen.

"Is that the reason you would like to go to heaven?"

"It's the reason why I'm willing to leave the earth," said Karen. "It hain't nothin' to do with heaven."

"Anybody might be willing to go to heaven at that rate," said Elizabeth.

"That ain't all, young lady," said Karen, working away while she spoke. "I'm not only willin' to go -- I'm willin' to _be_ there when I get there -- and I'm ready too, thank the Lord!"

"How can one be 'ready' for it, Karen? -- It seems such a change."

"It'll be a good change," said Karen. "Mis' Landholm thinks it is."

Elizabeth stood silent, the tears swelling; she got little light from Karen.

"You wa'n't one of the Lord's people when you come? -- be you?

--" said Karen suddenly, looking round at her.

"I hardly know whether I am one now, Karen, -- but I mean to try."

"Tryin' ain't no use," said Karen. "If you want to be one of the Lord's people, you've only to knock, and it shall be opened to you."

"Did you never know that fail?"

"I never tried it but once -- it didn't fail me then," said the old woman. "The Lord keeps his promises. -- I tried it a good while -- it don't do to stop knockin'."

"But I must -- one must try to do something -- I must try to do my duty," said Elizabeth.

"Surely!" said Karen, facing round upon her again, "but you can't help that. Do you s'pose you can love Jesus Christ, and _not_ love to please him? 'Tain't in natur' -- you can't help it."

"But suppose I don't love him, Karen?" said Elizabeth, her voice choking as she said it. "I don't know him yet -- I don't know him enough to love him."

There was a little pause; and then without looking at her, Karen said in her trembling voice, a little more trembling than it was,

"I don't know, Miss 'Lizabeth -- 'To them gave he power to become the sons of G.o.d, even to them that believe on his name!' -- I heard a man preach that once."

The tears rushed in full measure to Elizabeth's eyes. She stood, not heeding Karen nor anything else, and the thick veil of tears hiding everything from her sight. It was a moment of strong joy; for she knew she believed in him! She was, or she would be, one of 'his people.' Her strong pillar of a.s.surance she clasped again, and leaned her heart upon, with unspeakable rest.

She stood, till the water had cleared itself from her eyes; and then she was turning into the house, but turned back again, and went close up to the old black woman.

"Thank you, Karen," said she. "You have given me comfort."

"You hain't got it all," said Karen without looking at her.

"What do you mean?"

"Did you ever read a book called the 'Pilgrim's Progress,'

young lady?"

"No."

"I ain't much like the people there," said Karen, "but they was always glad to hear of one more that was going to be a pilgrim; and clapped their hands, they did."

"Did _you_ ever read it, Karen?"

"I hearn Mis' Landholm read it -- and the Governor."