John Ward, Preacher Part 31
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"Now, Jim," said Ellen, "you can answer this question, 'cause it's only one word, and begins with 'y.'"
"No fair!" cried Bob; "that's telling."
But Ellen proceeded to give the question: "Doth original sin wholly defile you, and is it sufficient to send you to h.e.l.l, though you had no other sin?"
"Yes!" roared Jim, pleased at being certainly right.
"What are you then by nature?" Ellen went on rather carelessly, for she was growing tired of the lesson.
"I am an enemy to G.o.d, a child of Satan, and an heir of h.e.l.l," answered Bobby promptly.
"What will become of the wicked?" asked the little catechist.
Bobby yawned, and then said contemptuously, "Oh, skip that,--cast into h.e.l.l, of course."
"You ought to answer right," Ellen said reprovingly, but she was glad to give the last question, "What will the wicked do forever in h.e.l.l?"
"They will roar, curse, and blaspheme G.o.d," said little Jim cheerfully; while Bobby, to show his joy that the lesson was done, leaned over on his flower-pot, and tried to stand on his head, making all the time an unearthly noise.
"I'm roarin'!" he cried gayly.
Ellen, freed from the responsibility of teaching, put the little yellow book quickly in her pocket, and said mysteriously, "Boys, if you won't ever tell, I'll tell you something."
"I won't," said Jim, while Bobby responded briefly, "G'on."
"Well, you know when the circus came,--you know the pictures on the fences?"
"Yes!" said the little boys together.
"'Member the beautiful lady, ridin' on a horse, and standin' on one foot?"
"Yes!" the others cried, breathlessly.
"Well," said Ellen slowly and solemnly, "when I get to be a big girl, that's what I'm going to be. I'm tired of catechism, and church, and those long blessings father asks, but most of catechism, so I'm going to run away, and be a circus."
"Father'll catch you," said Jim; but Bobby, with envious depreciation, added,--
"How do you know but what circuses have catechism?"
Ellen did not notice the lack of sympathy. "And I'm going to begin to practice now," she said.
Then, while her brothers watched her, deeply interested, she took off her shoes, and in her well-darned little red stockings climbed deliberately upon the grindstone.
"This is my horse," she said, balancing herself, with outstretched arms, on the stone, and making it revolve in a queer, jerky fas.h.i.+on by pressing her feet on it as though it were a treadmill, "and it is bare-backed!"
The iron handle came down with a thud, and Ellen lurched to keep from falling; the boys unwisely broke into cheers.
It made a pretty picture, the sunbeams sifting through the lilacs on the little fair heads, and dancing over Ellen's white ap.r.o.n and rosy face; but Mrs. Grier, who had come to the door at the noise of the cheers, did not stop to notice it.
"Oh, you naughty children!" she cried. "Don't you know it is wicked to play on the Sabbath? Ellen's playing circus, do you say, Bobby? You naughty, naughty girl! Don't you know circus people are all wicked, and don't go to heaven when they die? I should think you'd be ashamed! Go right up-stairs, Ellen, and go to bed; and you boys can each learn a psalm, and you'll have no supper, either,--do you hear?"
The children began to cry, but Mrs. Grier was firm; and when, a little later, Helen came down-stairs, ready for her ride, the house was strangely quiet. Mrs. Grier, really troubled at her children's sinfulness, confided their misdeeds to Helen, and was not soothed by the smile that flashed across her face.
"They were such good children to study their catechism first," she interceded, "and making a horse out of a grindstone shows an imagination which might excuse the playing."
But Mrs. Grier was not comforted, and only felt the more convinced of the lost condition of Mrs. Ward's soul. The conviction of other people's sin is sometimes a very pleasing emotion, so she bade her guest good-by with much cordiality and even pulled the skirt of her habit straight, and gave the gray a lump of sugar.
Helen told John of the scene under the lilacs, as they trotted down the lane to the highway, but his mood was too grave to see any humor in it.
Indeed, his frame of mind had changed after he left his wife for his second sermon. The exhilaration and triumph had gone, and the reaction had come. He brooded over his sin, and the hara.s.sed, distressed look of the last few days settled down again on his face. But Helen had regained her sweet serenity and content; she felt so certain that the darkness since Thursday had been the shadow in which his sermon had been conceived that her relief brought a joy which obscured any thought of regret that he should hold such views.
John's head was bent, and his hands were clasped upon his saddle-bow, while the reins fell loosely from between his listless fingers.
"You are so tired, John," Helen said regretfully.
He sighed, as though rousing himself from thought. "A little, dearest,"
and then his sorrowful eyes smiled. "You look so fresh and rested, Helen.
It was wise for you to lie down this afternoon."
"Oh, but I didn't," she said quickly. "I was busy thinking."
He looked at her eagerly. "Yes," she continued, "I think I know what has distressed you so these last few days, dear. It is this thought of the suffering of mankind. If you have felt that all the heathen who have died are in h.e.l.l, I don't wonder at your sorrow. It would be dreadful, and I wish you did not think it. But we will not talk about it,--of course you would rather not talk about it, even to me, but I understand."
She bent forward, and smiled brightly, as she looked at him. But his face was full of grief.
"It was not that, Helen," he said; "it was something nearer than that.
It was remorse, because of late, for nearly a year, I have neglected my people. I have not admonished them and warned them as I ought. And nearer still, because I have neglected you."
"Me!" she cried, too much astonished to say more.
"Yes," he answered, his head bent again upon his breast, "you, my dearest, my best beloved,--you, who are dearer than my life to me, dearer than my happiness. I have known that you have been far from truth, that you have not believed, and yet I--I have been silent."
Helen looked at him, and the sudden awful thought flashed into her mind that he did not know what he was saying, and then she said with a gasp: "Oh, John, is that all? Have you been so unhappy just because of that?
Oh, you poor fellow!"
She brought her horse close beside his, and laid her hand on his arm.
"Dear, what does it matter what I believe or do not believe? We love each other. And where is your tolerance, John?" She laughed, but the look of terrible concern in his face frightened her.
"Ah, Helen," he said, "such tolerance as you would have me show would be indifference."
"Oh, John!" she said, and then began resolutely to speak of other things.
But soon they fell into silence, Helen longing to get home and brush this useless and foolish anxiety from her husband's heart, and he agonizing for his sin towards her and towards his people.
The late afternoon suns.h.i.+ne gilded the tender green of the fields, and slanting deep into the darkness of the woods, touched the rough trunks of the trees with gold. Long shadows stretched across the road, and the fragrance which steals out with the evening dews began to come from unseen blossoms, and early clover; and a breath of the uncertain night wind brought hints of apple orchards or the pungent sweetness of cherry-blossoms. They had gone more than half-way home when they drew rein to water their horses, under a whispering pine by the roadside. The trough, overflowing with sparkling water, was green with moss and lichen, and was so old and soft that a bunch of ferns had found a home on its side. The horses thrust their noses down into it, blowing and sputtering with sheer delight in the coolness. John made a cup of a big beech leaf, and filled it for his wife. As he handed it to her, they heard steps, and in a moment more Mr. Grier came around the curve of the road. His horse, too, was thirsty, and he let the reins fall on its neck while he greeted them both with formal and ministerial dignity, saying he "wished they might have tarried until he came home, and perhaps he could have persuaded them to stay the night."
The horses pounded and splashed in the pools about their feet, and were impatient to be off, but Mr. Grier delayed. He spoke of church matters, and General a.s.sembly, and their respective congregations; and then, with a little hesitation, he said:--
"I had almost hoped, Mrs. Ward, that you would have been in Brother Ward's church to-day, even though Mrs. Grier had much pleasure in seeing you under our roof. I had you in my mind in the preparation of my sermon."
John Ward, Preacher Part 31
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John Ward, Preacher Part 31 summary
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