Homeward Bound Part 49

"Change has returned to the Race. Change has come to the Empire," Ka.s.squit said. "We had better embrace it, or soon there will be no more Empire."

She was a citizen of the Empire. She was a Big Ugly. If that did not make her a symbol of change, what would? And she was right. Anyone with eye turrets in his head could see that. "It is a truth," Atvar said. "Not a welcome truth, mind you, but a truth nonetheless."

"You spent many years on Tosev 3. You can see this," Ka.s.squit said. "Will those who have lived all their lives on Home and who are not familiar with wild Big Uglies and what they can do?"

"Oh, yes. Oh, Oh, yes." Atvar made the affirmative gesture. "If the Big Uglies can fly between their sun and ours in a fifth of a year while we take more than forty years to make the same journey, they will see. They will have to see." yes." Atvar made the affirmative gesture. "If the Big Uglies can fly between their sun and ours in a fifth of a year while we take more than forty years to make the same journey, they will see. They will have to see."

"For the Empire's sake, I hope so," Ka.s.squit said, which could only mean she wasn't completely convinced. "And I do thank you for speaking up for Sam Yeager, whether it did all you hoped or not. In his case, the wild Big Uglies should not be allowed to match the Race's high-handedness."

"We agree there," Atvar said. "The American Tosevites from the Admiral Peary Admiral Peary also agree on it. Whether we and they can persuade the newly hatched Americans from the also agree on it. Whether we and they can persuade the newly hatched Americans from the Commodore Perry Commodore Perry may be a different question." may be a different question."

"Arrogance lets you think you can do great things," Ka.s.squit said. "To that extent, it is good. But arrogance also makes you think no one else can do anything great. That, I fear, is anything but good."

"Again, we agree," Atvar said. "I do not see how anyone could disagree-anyone who is not very arrogant, I mean." Did that include the crew of the Commodore Perry Commodore Perry? Did it, for that matter, include most of the Race? Atvar could pose the question. Knowing the answer was something else again. Actually, he feared he did know the answer- but it was not the one he wanted.

Jonathan Yeager and Major Nicole Nichols sat in the refectory in the Americans' hotel in Sitneff. Jonathan was finis.h.i.+ng an azwaca cutlet. People said every unfamiliar meat tasted like chicken. As far as he was concerned, azwaca really did. Major Nichols had ordered zisuili ribs. She had enough bones in front of her to make a good start on building a frame house. She wasn't a big woman, and she certainly wasn't fat; she was in the hard good shape the military encouraged. She sure could put it away, though.

A sheet of paper lay on the table between them. Jonathan tapped it with his forefinger. "You see," he said.

Major Nichols nodded. "Yes. So I do. Very impressive." No matter what she said, she did not sound much impressed.

"If you don't take my father home, the rest of us don't want to go, either," Jonathan insisted. How readily he'd got the other Americans to put their signatures on the pet.i.tion surprised and touched him. It had been much easier than he'd worried it would be when he first thought about taking the step.

She looked at the paper, then up at him. She was a strikingly attractive woman, but she had a sniper's cold eyes. "Forgive me, Mr. Yeager, but you and your wife can't be objective about your father."

That only made Jonathan angry. He did his best not to show it. "I'm sure you're right," he said. "I wouldn't want to try to be objective about him. But you're pretending not to see something. My signature and Karen's aren't the only ones there. Every American on Home has signed it. That includes Major Coffey. Anyone would expect him to be on your side, not ours, if my dad had done anything even the least little bit out of line. And s.h.i.+plord Straha and Shuttlecraft Pilot Nesseref signed it, too, and you were the ones who brought them to Home."

"They're Lizards," Major Nichols said. "Of course they'd be happy enough to stay on Home."

"Come on. We both know better than that," Jonathan said. "Nesseref has lived on Earth for the past seventy years. Her friends are there. Friends count with Lizards the way family does with us. And Straha . . . Straha would complain no matter where he was staying."

"In some ways, his situation is a lot like your father's," Nicole Nichols said. She drummed her nails on the white plastic of the tabletop. "He's not particularly welcome no matter where he goes."

"Looks to me as though you're saying being right is the worst thing you can do," Jonathan said tightly.

"Have it your way, Mr. Yeager." Major Nichols folded the pet.i.tion and put it in her handbag. "Besides, with the Lizards it's academic. They aren't going back to Earth with us, for fear they might pa.s.s on a message to the Race's authorities back there. And the choice about your father isn't mine any which way. I will take this doc.u.ment back to the Commodore Perry Commodore Perry and let my superiors decide." and let my superiors decide."

"Yeah. You do that," Jonathan said. "It wouldn't look so good if you came back to Earth with none of us aboard, would it?"

She only shrugged. She was a cool customer. "We'd handle it," she said. "We can handle just about anything, Mr. Yeager." She got to her feet. "No need to show me the way out. I already know." Away she went.

Jonathan muttered under his breath. This younger generation struck him as a mechanical bunch. For a nickel, he would have kicked Major Nichols in the teeth. He would have tried, anyway. He suspected she could mop the floor with him, and probably with any other three people here who weren't Frank Coffey.

He got up, too, and slowly walked out of the refectory. He'd done everything he could do. So had everybody else on Home. He saw that Major Coffey's John Hanc.o.c.k didn't much impress Major Nichols-not that anything much did impress her. But Coffey's signature sure impressed him. Even if Frank was going to be a daddy, he didn't want to spend the rest of his life on Home. He'd signed anyway, to keep an injustice from being done to Jonathan's father.

A Lizard came skittering up to Jonathan. His body paint proclaimed him a reporter. Jonathan immediately grew wary. The Race's reporters were much like those on Earth: too many of them were sensation-seeking fools. "How does it feel to travel faster than light?" this one demanded, shoving a microphone at Jonathan.

"I do not know," Jonathan answered. "I have never done it." The Race evidently couldn't keep secret any longer what the Commodore Perry Commodore Perry had done. had done.

The reporter gave Jonathan what was obviously intended as a suspicious stare. "But you are a Big Ugly," he said, as if challenging Jonathan to deny it. "How could you be here without having traveled faster than light?"

"Because I am a Tosevite from the Admiral Peary, Admiral Peary, not from the not from the Commodore Perry, Commodore Perry," Jonathan said resignedly. "We flew here in cold sleep slower than light, the same way your s.h.i.+ps travel. You do remember the Admiral Peary, Admiral Peary, do you not?" He made his interrogative cough as sarcastic as he could. do you not?" He made his interrogative cough as sarcastic as he could.

That might have been lost on the Lizard. After some thought, the reporter used the affirmative gesture. "I think perhaps I may. But the Admiral Peary Admiral Peary is old news. I am sure of that. I want new news." He hurried away. is old news. I am sure of that. I want new news." He hurried away.

"Old news," Jonathan said in English. He sighed. It wasn't that the Lizard was wrong. In fact, there was the problem: the male was right. The Americans from the Admiral Peary Admiral Peary were old news, in more ways than one. Had Major Nichols heard the reporter, she would have agreed with him. were old news, in more ways than one. Had Major Nichols heard the reporter, she would have agreed with him.

Jonathan found himself hoping the none-too-bright Lizard did end up running into Nicole Nichols. He would infuriate her, and she would horrify him. As far as Jonathan was concerned, they deserved each other.

One of the elevators opened up. Tom de la Rosa came out. Jonathan waved to him. Tom came over. Jonathan said, "Beware of idiot Lizard reporters running around loose."

"Sounds like a good thing to beware of," Tom agreed. "And speaking of bewares, have you talked with the gal from the Commodore Perry Commodore Perry?"

"I sure have-I just finished lunch with her, in fact. I gave her the pet.i.tion, too." Jonathan set a hand on Tom's shoulder for a moment. "Thanks for signing it."

De la Rosa shrugged. "Hey, what else could I do? Right is right. Those yahoos have no business marooning your old man here."

"You know that, and I know that, but I'll be d.a.m.ned if I'm sure they know that," Jonathan said. "And you know you're taking a chance with that thing. They're liable to call us on it. If they do, none of us goes home from Home."

"Yeah, well . . ." Tom shrugged again. "Linda and I hashed that one out. If they're the kind of stiff-necked b.a.s.t.a.r.ds who won't bend even when they ought to, I don't think I want to go back to the USA any more. It wouldn't be my country, you know? The company'd be better here."

Tears stung Jonathan's eyes. He blinked several times; he didn't want Tom to see that. Pride, Pride, he thought, and laughed at himself. "We can be expatriates sitting in the sleazy bars in Sitneff, and all the earnest young American tourists who come here can stare at us and wonder about all the nasty things we've done." he thought, and laughed at himself. "We can be expatriates sitting in the sleazy bars in Sitneff, and all the earnest young American tourists who come here can stare at us and wonder about all the nasty things we've done."

"There you go!" Tom laughed out loud. "The Lost Generation. h.e.l.l, we're already the Lost Generation. If you don't believe me, ask anybody from the Commodore Perry. Commodore Perry. Those people are convinced we've got no business being alive any more." Those people are convinced we've got no business being alive any more."

"You'd better believe it!" Jonathan used the catch phrase with sour glee. "Major Nichols told Dad they tried to get here before we did. Wouldn't that have been a kick in the nuts for us?"

"Oh, yeah. Sweet Jesus, yeah." De la Rosa made a horrible face. "We'd've been like the dead atheist decked out in a suit: all dressed up with no place to go."

"As it is, we get into the history books whether our ungrateful grandchildren like it or not," Jonathan said, and Tom nodded. Jonathan's thoughts traveled the light-years far faster than the Commodore Perry Commodore Perry could hope to. "I do wonder what things are like back on Earth." could hope to. "I do wonder what things are like back on Earth."

"Well, from what I've been able to pick up, the politics are the same old yak-yak-yak," de la Rosa said. "The ecology . . ." He looked revolted. "It's about as bad as we figured it would be. Lots and lots of species from Home crowding out ours wherever it's hot and dry. Earth isn't the place it was when we left."

Jonathan sighed. "Like you say, it's not a hot headline. I don't know how we're going to be able to put that genie back in the bottle again. The place I feel sorry for is Australia." He used an emphatic cough. "It's had its ecology turned upside down twice in two hundred years."

"Isn't that the sad and sorry truth?" Tom said. "You hate to see something like that, because there's just no way in h.e.l.l to repair the damage. Too many native species have already gone extinct, and more are going all the time. When you add in rabbits and rats and cats and cane toads and cattle and azwaca and zisuili and befflem . . . And plants are just as bad, or maybe worse."

"I know. I don't know the way you do-you're the expert-but I've got the basic idea," Jonathan said, and de la Rosa nodded. "I hope we get to see for ourselves, that's all."

"Me, too." De la Rosa looked fierce. His piratical mustache helped. "If we don't, I'm going to blame you. And I'll have all the time in the world to do it, too, because we'll both be stuck here for the rest of our lives."

"Well, if we start throwing missiles back and forth with the Lizards, that won't be real long," Jonathan said. Tom looked unhappy, not because he was wrong but because he was right. He went on, "Of course, that's liable to be just as true back on Earth as it is here."

"You think the Lizards can still hurt us back on Earth?" Tom asked. "People from the Commodore Perry Commodore Perry don't seem to." don't seem to."

"I'm not sure. I'm not sure anybody else is sure, either," Jonathan answered. "I'll tell you this, though, for whatever you think it's worth: the last time Major Nichols came out of a meeting with Atvar, she'd had some of that up-yours knocked out of her. Whatever he told her, it didn't make her very happy. Maybe the Race has figured out how to do something, even if they've got to do it in slow motion."

"I almost wouldn't mind-almost," Tom emphasized. "Where one side figures it can lick the other one easy as pie, that's where your wars come from. If both sides figure they'll get hurt, they're more likely to take it easy on each other."

Jonathan nodded. "That makes more sense than I wish it did." He thought back to Earth again. "Before too long, maybe it won't matter so much. We'll have colonies all over the place. Eggs and baskets, you know what I mean?"

"Oh, h.e.l.l, yes," Tom de la Rosa said. "We will, and one of these days maybe the Lizards will, too, if we don't kill each other off first. And the Germans will, and the Russians, and the j.a.panese. . . ."

"Lord!" That took some more contemplating. Jonathan said, "I hope the n.a.z.is and the Reds don't end up with colonies on the same planet. They'd start banging away at each other, same as they were doing when the conquest fleet came."

"Yeah, that'd be fun, wouldn't it?" Tom said.

Jonathan nodded, though fun wasn't what either of them had in mind. He said, "The n.a.z.is owe the Race one, too. If I were a Lizard, I'd worry about that."

"If you were a Lizard, you'd have other things to worry about, like not looking right," Tom pointed out. Jonathan made a face at him. People had much more mobile features than Lizards did. The Race used hand gestures to get across a lot of things humans did with their faces and heads. De la Rosa went on, "I wonder how Ka.s.squit feels about being pregnant now. This isn't the best time to bring a kid into the world-any world."

"She#x2019;ll do okay, I think," Jonathan said. "There#x2019;s always been more to her than meets the eye." And even if she is knocked up, I had nothing to do with it, and Karen can't say I did, And even if she is knocked up, I had nothing to do with it, and Karen can't say I did, he thought. he thought.

Ka.s.squit did not enjoy Dr. Melanie Blanchard's examinations, which was putting it mildly. The wild Big Ugly had warned she would poke and prod, and she did, in Ka.s.squit's most intimate places. For that matter, Ka.s.squit enjoyed next to nothing about being gravid, which was also putting it mildly. She wanted to sleep all the time. Her b.r.e.a.s.t.s were constantly sore. And she went on vomiting. Dr. Blanchard called that morning sickness, but it could strike her at any time of the day or night.

Hoping to distract the doctor from her probings and pus.h.i.+ngs, Ka.s.squit asked, "What possible evolutionary good is there in these disgusting symptoms?"

"I do not know." Dr. Blanchard wasn't distracted a bit. Ka.s.squit hadn't really thought she would be. "I do not believe anyone else does. It is a good question, though."

"I thank you so very much." Ka.s.squit packed as much irony as she could into her voice.

Instead of getting angry, Melanie Blanchard laughed a loud Tosevite laugh. "I am sorry not to be able to give you more help about this," she said. "Some doctors claim that women who have morning sickness are less likely to produce a hatchling that cannot survive than those who do not, but I am not sure this has been proved."

"Produce a hatchling that cannot survive?" The phrase sounded awkward to Ka.s.squit.

"English has a term for this-miscarry." Dr. Blanchard spoke the word in her language. "If you miscarry, miscarry, you discharge the hatchling from your body long before it would come out if everything were normal. you discharge the hatchling from your body long before it would come out if everything were normal. Miscarried Miscarried hatchlings usually have something wrong with them that would not let them live." hatchlings usually have something wrong with them that would not let them live."

"I see. They are like eggs that are fertile and laid where conditions are good, but that do not hatch," Ka.s.squit said.

The doctor made the affirmative gesture. "Yes, I think that is a good comparison," she said. "I must tell you, Researcher: I do not know as much as I might about how the Race develops. Keeping track of how Tosevites work is a full-time job in itself."

"I believe that," Ka.s.squit said.

"Good. It is a truth." Dr. Blanchard used an emphatic cough. She peeled off the elastomere glove she'd been wearing and tossed it into a trash can. "For now, I am glad to say, you seem as healthy and normal as any female could."

"This is good to hear," Ka.s.squit said. "Do you have any idea how long the morning sickness will last?"

"It usually ends after the first third of your gravidity-about half of one of Home's years after your egg was fertilized," Dr. Blanchard answered. "Bear in mind, though, that is not a promise. Each female is different. Some never have morning sickness at all. Some have it much more severely than you do, and suffer from it until the hatchling comes out. I am sorry, but you will just have to wait and see."

"I am sorry, too." Ka.s.squit felt like using an emphatic cough of her own. "Have you finished inspecting me for this time?"

"Yes." Dr. Blanchard nodded, then used the affirmative gesture. "As I say, you have earned the stamp of approval." She mimed applying the stamp to Ka.s.squit's left b.u.t.tock. Ka.s.squit's mouth fell open. That was funny, but not funny enough to make her laugh out loud the way the wild Big Uglies did.

Laughter or no, she was anything but sorry to escape the doctor. Getting examined took her back to the days of her hatchlinghood. Members of the Race had constantly poked and prodded at her then. In a way, she couldn't blame them for that. They were trying to find out as much as they could about Tosevites. In another way . . .

She shrugged. No doubt she would have been addled no matter how the Race raised her. One species simply could not fill all the needs the hatchlings of another had. That was all the more true when the first was imperfectly familiar with the needs of the second.

Part of her wished she could go back to Tosev 3 on the Commodore Perry. Commodore Perry. She would have liked to meet Mickey and Donald. If anybody on four worlds could understand her and what she'd gone through over the years, the males the Yeagers had raised were the ones. By all accounts, they had done well for themselves in the United States. But they were also surely caught between their biology and their culture. Mickey had said as much in the t.i.tle of his autobiography. She would have liked to meet Mickey and Donald. If anybody on four worlds could understand her and what she'd gone through over the years, the males the Yeagers had raised were the ones. By all accounts, they had done well for themselves in the United States. But they were also surely caught between their biology and their culture. Mickey had said as much in the t.i.tle of his autobiography.

Had they learned the Race's language, or did they speak only English? If they had learned the Race's tongue, did they speak it with an accent? They would have the right mouthparts to speak it properly, yes. They wouldn't have the mushy tone Tosevites couldn't help. But they would have grown up using very different sounds: the sounds of English. How much difference would that make?

I should have learned English, she thought. But she had a pretty good idea why the Race had never taught it to her. The males and females in charge of such things must have feared learning a Tosevite language would make her too much like a wild Big Ugly. And maybe they'd even been right. Who could say for sure? she thought. But she had a pretty good idea why the Race had never taught it to her. The males and females in charge of such things must have feared learning a Tosevite language would make her too much like a wild Big Ugly. And maybe they'd even been right. Who could say for sure?

If she did ask to go aboard the Commodore Perry Commodore Perry and visit Tosev 3, what would the American Tosevites say? Ka.s.squit paused and then made the negative gesture. That was the wrong question. The right question was, how was she worse off even if they said no? If they did, she would be where she was now. If they said yes, she would be better off than she was now. As was true most of the time, asking was the right thing to do here. and visit Tosev 3, what would the American Tosevites say? Ka.s.squit paused and then made the negative gesture. That was the wrong question. The right question was, how was she worse off even if they said no? If they did, she would be where she was now. If they said yes, she would be better off than she was now. As was true most of the time, asking was the right thing to do here.

But whom could she ask? The formidable female officer named Nichols? Ka.s.squit hadn't seen her around the hotel lately. She hadn't seen anyone from the Commodore Perry Commodore Perry around the hotel lately. Maybe that meant nothing. Maybe it meant the faster-than-light s.h.i.+p was about to bombard Sitneff. How could you tell what wild Big Uglies would do next? Ka.s.squit knew she couldn't. around the hotel lately. Maybe that meant nothing. Maybe it meant the faster-than-light s.h.i.+p was about to bombard Sitneff. How could you tell what wild Big Uglies would do next? Ka.s.squit knew she couldn't.

She went to see Amba.s.sador Yeager. He laughed. "You want me to get them to take you?" he said. "I cannot even get them to take me."

"I know that, superior sir. I am sorry for it. I think it is altogether unjust." Ka.s.squit added an emphatic cough.

"Now that you mention it, so do I," Sam Yeager said. "I hope you will not be angry, but I have to tell you that I do not think traveling on the Commodore Perry Commodore Perry would be good for you, at least not in the near future." would be good for you, at least not in the near future."

"Why not?" Ka.s.squit demanded. There were times when she thought everyone on four worlds joined together in thwarting her. She knew such thoughts were not true, but that did not always keep her from having them.

"Well, for one thing, you would keep company with many more wild Big Uglies than you ever have before," the American amba.s.sador answered. "You would have a much greater risk of disease than you ever had before. Who can say how you would respond? You have never been exposed to diseases before. And remember, you are gravid. Disease could also affect the hatchling growing inside you. So could traveling faster than light. I do not know that it would. But I do not know that it would not, either. I do know that hatchlings growing inside females are often more sensitive to changes in environment than adults are. If I commanded the Commodore Perry, Commodore Perry, I would not accept you as a pa.s.senger simply because you are gravid." I would not accept you as a pa.s.senger simply because you are gravid."

"I . . . see." Ka.s.squit had expected Sam Yeager to argue in terms of politics and statesmans.h.i.+p. Instead, he'd talked about biology. That was harder to refute or get around. Ka.s.squit wasn't sure she should try to get around it, either. She said, "Would Dr. Blanchard confirm what you say?"

"I think so. By all means, ask her," the amba.s.sador replied. "And ask a member of the Race who has studied Tosevites. I am not a physician." He tacked on an emphatic cough to stress the not. not. "All I can tell you is what a reasonably well-educated wild Big Ugly thinks he knows. Experts know better than I do. Talk to them." "All I can tell you is what a reasonably well-educated wild Big Ugly thinks he knows. Experts know better than I do. Talk to them."

"It shall be done." Ka.s.squit pointed accusingly at Yeager. "You make entirely too much sense."

He laughed again, on the same sour note he'd used the first time. "I am glad you think so. I am glad somebody thinks so. There are a good many who think I am nothing but an old fool."

"I have never been one of those," Ka.s.squit said. "The way you think has always interested me, ever since the days when we both pretended to be members of the Race on the computer bulletin-board system back on Tosev 3." She pointed at him again. "You should not have been able to gain access to that system."

Now Sam Yeager's laugh held real amus.e.m.e.nt. "I know. I had a friend who got the necessary programming for me."

"A friend," Ka.s.squit echoed. She had no trouble figuring out what that meant. "Not another wild Big Ugly, not that long ago. You mean a male of the Race, someone from the conquest fleet."

"Well, what if I do?" Yeager answered. "Even then, plenty of males decided they would rather live in the United States than in the lands the Race ruled. We released all the prisoners of war we held who wanted to go. The rest became what we call naturalized citizens of our not-empire."

"It sounds like treason to me," Ka.s.squit said darkly.

But Sam Yeager made the negative gesture. "No, not at all. You are a citizen of the Empire. You are loyal to the Race and the Emperor. Your species does not matter. When members of the Race become naturalized citizens of the United States, they give it their loyalty. Their species does not matter, either."

"Maybe," Ka.s.squit said. "But I am suspicious of those who change their loyalty after they are adult."

"There is some truth in that, but, I think, only some," Yeager said. "The history of Tosev 3 shows that there can be more reasons for changing one's loyalty than somebody familiar only with the history of the Race might think."

"I would guess the history of Tosev 3 also shows more treason than the history of the Race," Ka.s.squit said.

"And I would guess you are right," the American amba.s.sador said, which surprised her-she'd been trying to make him angry. He went on, "The Race has been politically unified for all these years. That leaves small room for treason. On Tosev 3, we have had and do have all sorts of competing sovereignties. An individual may work for one while loyal to another. We may be barbarous-a lot of the time, we are are barbarous-but we have more complicated, more sophisticated politics than the Race does." barbarous-but we have more complicated, more sophisticated politics than the Race does."

"More complicated, anyhow." Ka.s.squit was in no mood the praise wild Big Uglies.

Sam Yeager only laughed again. "Have it your way, Researcher. I would like to see you come back to Tosev 3 one of these days. Mickey and Donald would be glad to meet you-you have a lot in common with them."