A Beautiful Mind Part 13

THE C CARRIER C CLINIC, formerly a sanatorium for the senile and r.e.t.a.r.ded, was one of only two private mental hospitals in New Jersey. Located in the picturesque hamlet of Belle Meade, amidst rolling hills and lush farmland, Carrier was just five miles north of Princeton. Despite its easy proximity, however, it was generally avoided by Princetonians. As Robert Garber, a former president of the American Psychiatric a.s.sociation who was Carrier's medical director at the time, recalled: "They didn't want to be in a psychiatric facility close to home. It was a disgrace, a terrible stigma, nothing like today. The idea was to get as far away as possible." formerly a sanatorium for the senile and r.e.t.a.r.ded, was one of only two private mental hospitals in New Jersey. Located in the picturesque hamlet of Belle Meade, amidst rolling hills and lush farmland, Carrier was just five miles north of Princeton. Despite its easy proximity, however, it was generally avoided by Princetonians. As Robert Garber, a former president of the American Psychiatric a.s.sociation who was Carrier's medical director at the time, recalled: "They didn't want to be in a psychiatric facility close to home. It was a disgrace, a terrible stigma, nothing like today. The idea was to get as far away as possible."1 Princetonians regarded Carrier, which had the look of a slightly seedy boarding school, with some distaste for another reason as well. Carrier had none of the prestige of top-of-the-line inst.i.tutions like McLean, Austin Riggs, or Chestnut Lodge, whose academic affiliations, psychoa.n.a.lytical orientation, and long-term approaches based on the "talking cure" were regarded, especially by academics, as more humane and appropriate, especially for the well-educated. Popular views of psychiatry were being shaped by One Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest, I Never Promised You a Rose Garden, One Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest, I Never Promised You a Rose Garden, and the libertarian views of Thomas Szasz, who held that insanity was a social construct rather than a symptom of disease. and the libertarian views of Thomas Szasz, who held that insanity was a social construct rather than a symptom of disease.2 At the time when these views were gaining popularity, especially on campuses, Carrier had a reputation for the aggressive use of "chemical straitjackets" and electroshock, and short-term cookie-cutter approaches tailored to the time limits set by insurance policies. At the time when these views were gaining popularity, especially on campuses, Carrier had a reputation for the aggressive use of "chemical straitjackets" and electroshock, and short-term cookie-cutter approaches tailored to the time limits set by insurance policies.

The Carrier staff, well aware of such att.i.tudes, defended itself by arguing that its approach was more practical and worked better. "McLean, Austin Riggs, Chestnut Lodge, Shepherd Pratt, and Inst.i.tute for Living, these were all much fancier," said William Otis, a psychiatrist on Carrier's staff. "We were very clinical. None of us had any fancy training. None of us were stars. But the ironic thing is that if you were sick you were much better off at Carrier."3 Garber said: "At Carrier we were proud of the fact that we set ourselves up as a short-term treatment center. That's why we were so successful. We were able to treat the patients and get them out, in contrast to McLean and Chestnut Lodge, which were notorious for having schizophrenic patients there for four, five, and seven years." Garber said: "At Carrier we were proud of the fact that we set ourselves up as a short-term treatment center. That's why we were so successful. We were able to treat the patients and get them out, in contrast to McLean and Chestnut Lodge, which were notorious for having schizophrenic patients there for four, five, and seven years."4 It was Alicia who, despite the impending divorce, felt responsible for Nash, and therefore had to face the decision.5 It took a great deal of courage, as anyone who has had to make such a decision knows. As one psychiatrist at Carrier said, "Commitments always created terrible conflicts in the family. It was very hard to find somebody who wanted to take the responsibility." It took a great deal of courage, as anyone who has had to make such a decision knows. As one psychiatrist at Carrier said, "Commitments always created terrible conflicts in the family. It was very hard to find somebody who wanted to take the responsibility."6 Alicia, like everyone else around Nash, abhorred the idea of involuntary commitment and feared that treatment, besides being uncertain of success, carried the risks of irreparable harm. But she also knew that Nash was on a disastrous course and was convinced that failure to act would almost certainly lead to further deterioration. The psychoa.n.a.lysts at McLean had failed, the effects of the shock treatments at Trenton had proved short-lived. She was prepared to try something new. She recognized that the most prestigious hospitals were unaffordable. At Carrier, patients' families paid a flat fee of eighty dollars a day plus hourly fees for group and individual therapy; Virginia was able to pay that. Besides, it was important to Alicia that Nash be close by, so that she and his old acquaintances at Princeton could visit him. Alicia, like everyone else around Nash, abhorred the idea of involuntary commitment and feared that treatment, besides being uncertain of success, carried the risks of irreparable harm. But she also knew that Nash was on a disastrous course and was convinced that failure to act would almost certainly lead to further deterioration. The psychoa.n.a.lysts at McLean had failed, the effects of the shock treatments at Trenton had proved short-lived. She was prepared to try something new. She recognized that the most prestigious hospitals were unaffordable. At Carrier, patients' families paid a flat fee of eighty dollars a day plus hourly fees for group and individual therapy; Virginia was able to pay that. Besides, it was important to Alicia that Nash be close by, so that she and his old acquaintances at Princeton could visit him.

So in the third week of April, after it had become all too clear that Nash was unprepared to enter treatment at Michigan, she went ahead with arrangements to have Nash taken to Carrier. Once again, she asked Martha and Virginia to come up to Princeton and sign the commitment papers.

From the outset, however, Alicia drew the line at electroshock.7 "We debated electroshock therapy," Martha recalled. "But we didn't want to mess with his memory." "We debated electroshock therapy," Martha recalled. "But we didn't want to mess with his memory."8 At Carrier, electroshock was frequently used for schizophrenic patients, who generally got three times as many treatments - twenty-five versus eight - as patients suffering from depression.9 Garber said, "What we were trying to do was to gain control of that patient - to break through his excitement, panic, depression - in the shortest possible time." Garber said, "What we were trying to do was to gain control of that patient - to break through his excitement, panic, depression - in the shortest possible time."10 Generally, psychotic patients were initially treated with Thorazine, and those whose disturbed behavior didn't improve quickly were also treated with electroshock. Some of the psychiatrists at Carrier felt that the shock treatments were effective and produced fewer side effects than neuroleptic drugs. In any case, despite the nearly universal belief around Princeton that Nash received electroshock treatments at Carrier, he apparently did not. Generally, psychotic patients were initially treated with Thorazine, and those whose disturbed behavior didn't improve quickly were also treated with electroshock. Some of the psychiatrists at Carrier felt that the shock treatments were effective and produced fewer side effects than neuroleptic drugs. In any case, despite the nearly universal belief around Princeton that Nash received electroshock treatments at Carrier, he apparently did not.

Nash spent most of the next five months of 1963 in Kindred One, the only locked ward at Carrier. He said later that he made efforts to overturn his commitment; if so, they were not successful. Frank L. Scott recalled that Nash went AWOL from Carrier at least once - presumably after he got ground privileges - and that he had to track him down and return him to the hospital.11 Compared to Trenton, however, Carrier was, if no country club, at least more like a reform school than a prison. There were just eighty patients, the majority of whom came from comfortable middle-cla.s.s homes, many from New York and Philadelphia, and most of whom suffered from alcoholism, drug addiction, and depression rather than from psychotic illnesses. Philadelphia, and most of whom suffered from alcoholism, drug addiction, and depression rather than from psychotic illnesses.12 Carrier had a dozen psychiatrists on its staff, a more adequate nursing staff than at Trenton, and a reasonable complement of medical doctors, psychologists, and social workers. Carrier had a dozen psychiatrists on its staff, a more adequate nursing staff than at Trenton, and a reasonable complement of medical doctors, psychologists, and social workers.

Kindred One had single and double rooms. Nash, it seems, had a room to himself. He had access to a telephone. He was allowed to wear his own clothing. Patients were addressed by their t.i.tles and last names, so he was Dr. Nash, not Johnny as he was at Trenton. Nash's wishes regarding his vegetarianism - which "doesn't exclude animal products, for example, milk, but only the animal products which become available only at the death (execution of the animal)" - were apparently respected.13 Alicia visited regularly, as did a number of others from Princeton, among them Spencer, Tucker, and the Borels. Alicia visited regularly, as did a number of others from Princeton, among them Spencer, Tucker, and the Borels.14 Probably the best thing that happened to Nash at Carrier was that he met a psychiatrist, Howard S. Mele, who was to play an important and positive role in his life for the next two years.15 The psychiatrist, who happened to be on duty the night that Nash was brought to Carrier, was a.s.signed to care for him. A short, soft-spoken, dapper man of Italian descent who got his medical degree at Long Island College of Medicine and did his residency at Mt. Sinai Hospital in New York City, Mele was quiet and careful. The psychiatrist, who happened to be on duty the night that Nash was brought to Carrier, was a.s.signed to care for him. A short, soft-spoken, dapper man of Italian descent who got his medical degree at Long Island College of Medicine and did his residency at Mt. Sinai Hospital in New York City, Mele was quiet and careful.16 Described by his former colleagues as "conventional," "cautious," "not an exciting man," Mele was, as later events showed, competent and caring. Described by his former colleagues as "conventional," "cautious," "not an exciting man," Mele was, as later events showed, competent and caring.17 He was respected by the nursing staff. Belle Parmet, the inst.i.tute's social worker at the time, said of Mele and the other staff psychiatrists: "They weren't just pill pushers or prescription writers. They were all humanistic." He was respected by the nursing staff. Belle Parmet, the inst.i.tute's social worker at the time, said of Mele and the other staff psychiatrists: "They weren't just pill pushers or prescription writers. They were all humanistic."18 Nash responded quite quickly to his initial treatment with Thorazine. If someone responds at all to what are now called "typical" neuroleptics, dramatic changes are usually evident within a week, and the full effect becomes apparent within six weeks. Two weeks after his commitment, Nash wrote a relatively lucid letter to Norbert Wiener, saying, among other things, "My problems seem to be essentially problems of communications. I don't know how they can be resolved. Perhaps I shall be able to approach their solution as a result of begging for aid. (However, this isn't a begging letter!)"19 At this point, Nash was seeing Mele for therapy sessions and also partic.i.p.ating in group therapy, which Mele particularly favored.20 There was, however, no thought of releasing him quickly. As Garber said, "Paranoid schizophrenics are not that responsive. Once you do get them under control, you have to satisfy yourself that they've stabilized. You don't want a relapse, especially if there's been a commitment because then you and the family would have to start all over." There was, however, no thought of releasing him quickly. As Garber said, "Paranoid schizophrenics are not that responsive. Once you do get them under control, you have to satisfy yourself that they've stabilized. You don't want a relapse, especially if there's been a commitment because then you and the family would have to start all over."

By August, Nash was beginning to look forward to getting out of Carrier. He wrote to Virginia that he was antic.i.p.ating Alicia's visit on the weekend and was "thinking of getting out."21 He added that "Mele thinks it depends on having a He added that "Mele thinks it depends on having a job." Nash admitted that he was ill and in need of treatment but said that "Michigan might have been a better deal." He asked Milnor for help in getting a job. On September 24, Nash wrote again saying that Sunday was "a sad day" because Alicia had to work overtime and couldn't come to take him out. He said that the Inst.i.tute for Advanced Study had decided to offer him a position. job." Nash admitted that he was ill and in need of treatment but said that "Michigan might have been a better deal." He asked Milnor for help in getting a job. On September 24, Nash wrote again saying that Sunday was "a sad day" because Alicia had to work overtime and couldn't come to take him out. He said that the Inst.i.tute for Advanced Study had decided to offer him a position.22 A week later, upbeat again, he wrote that he was thinking of buying a car and that there were "good propects for a reconciliation" with Alicia. A week later, upbeat again, he wrote that he was thinking of buying a car and that there were "good propects for a reconciliation" with Alicia.23 It is a discouraging but well-doc.u.mented fact that people who suffer from schizophrenia face an extremely high risk of suicide, comparable to those who suffer from severe depressions and one hundred times that of the general population.24 This risk is greatest not when the person is sickest, but shortly after a course of treatment has been declared a success. Though no one else can truly know the state of mind that leads someone to take his life, one can imagine that this is a time when the absence of delusions allows other feelings, including very painful ones, to emerge and that hopes that one has been nurturing for months collide with harsh reality. This risk is greatest not when the person is sickest, but shortly after a course of treatment has been declared a success. Though no one else can truly know the state of mind that leads someone to take his life, one can imagine that this is a time when the absence of delusions allows other feelings, including very painful ones, to emerge and that hopes that one has been nurturing for months collide with harsh reality.

Louisa Cauvin, who married Jean-Pierre Cauvin in the summer of 1963, has a haunting memory, which likely dates from that summer, the only time she ever talked with Nash.25 They met at a party. (Presumably he was home from Carrier on a pa.s.s.) Nash told Louisa that he didn't feel life was worth living and saw no reason why he should not do away with himself. There is no evidence to show that Nash ever came close to acting on this thought. But he was certainly depressed. His hope for a reconciliation with Alicia, for example, proved overly optimistic. Alicia insisted that Nash live apart from her and Johnny (as John Charles was now called), so, instead of moving back to Spruce Street, Nash found himself in a rented room at 142 Mercer Street, a few doors down from the house occupied by Einstein during his Princeton years. They met at a party. (Presumably he was home from Carrier on a pa.s.s.) Nash told Louisa that he didn't feel life was worth living and saw no reason why he should not do away with himself. There is no evidence to show that Nash ever came close to acting on this thought. But he was certainly depressed. His hope for a reconciliation with Alicia, for example, proved overly optimistic. Alicia insisted that Nash live apart from her and Johnny (as John Charles was now called), so, instead of moving back to Spruce Street, Nash found himself in a rented room at 142 Mercer Street, a few doors down from the house occupied by Einstein during his Princeton years.

Once again, Borel and Selberg had arranged a one-year members.h.i.+p at the Inst.i.tute for Advanced Study, although this time they did so with less hope.26 The 196364 members.h.i.+p was probably a rescue mission. Borel later said, "All members are voted by the whole school of people. I did the legwork. It was only to present the case to my colleagues." The 196364 members.h.i.+p was probably a rescue mission. Borel later said, "All members are voted by the whole school of people. I did the legwork. It was only to present the case to my colleagues."27" Oppenheimer decided this time to use the Inst.i.tute's own funds, saying in a note to Selberg, "This enterprise seems to me not too suitable for contract funds," implying that, in contrast to the previous 196162 appointment, this one was more clearly a charitable exercise.28 Meanwhile, Nash's old friends outside Princeton had not lost interest in his progress. A letter from David Gale to Deane Montgomery at the Inst.i.tute, with copies to Milnor and Morgenstern, gives a flavor of the level of interest in and concern about Nash's situation: We got onto the subject of John Nash and wondered what his present situation was, in particular with regard to his state of his mind. It turned out that none of us knew what was going on medically nor did we know of any one else who knew. We had all heard rumors varying from "the doctors say there is no hope" to "he's doing mathematics again."

The thing that disturbed us was not our own lack of knowledge about Nash's condition but the thought that perhaps everyone in the mathematical community was in the same position we were and that consequently Nash might not be getting the best possible medical attention. It is certainly true that the mathematical community has provided fellows.h.i.+ps and jobs of various sorts for Nash whenever he has needed them. This is as much as we should be expected to do, provided some other competent, informed and adequately endowed person or persons are looking after the medical situation. Since Nash is now at the Inst.i.tute, I thought you might be in a position to know whether such a person exists and to rea.s.sure us that everything that can be done is being taken care of. If it should turn out that for lack of money, for instance, Nash was not getting the care he ought to have, I'm confident that we could get together a friends of Nash group to see what could be done about it.29

To come out, to go through the motions of starting over, to see one's old friends and colleagues again was not easy. Nash stayed out of sight at the Inst.i.tute. Few of that year's visitors recalled seeing him there. He complained in the fall of "feeling lonely."30 He and Alicia still attended parties together, but she resisted any idea of their resuming their marriage. She was having difficulties at her job and found her son hard to handle. But when her mother took John Charles to El Salvador for several months that winter, she missed him terribly. Nash tried to be sympathetic, writing in March that "Alicia is seeing a psychiatrist. She is very depressed. She was crying." He and Alicia still attended parties together, but she resisted any idea of their resuming their marriage. She was having difficulties at her job and found her son hard to handle. But when her mother took John Charles to El Salvador for several months that winter, she missed him terribly. Nash tried to be sympathetic, writing in March that "Alicia is seeing a psychiatrist. She is very depressed. She was crying."31 Yet he also said that he was "learning new things" and then, in December, that Selberg was trying to arrange visiting positions for him either at MIT or Berkeley.32 He continued to hope for a reconciliation; he and Alicia continued to socialize as a couple. Nash seemed, as the fall unfolded, to be in far better shape than he had been during his previous interlude at the Inst.i.tute. As he said in his Madrid lecture, he "had an idea which is referred to as Nash Blowing UP which I discussed with an eminent mathematician named Hironaka." He continued to hope for a reconciliation; he and Alicia continued to socialize as a couple. Nash seemed, as the fall unfolded, to be in far better shape than he had been during his previous interlude at the Inst.i.tute. As he said in his Madrid lecture, he "had an idea which is referred to as Nash Blowing UP which I discussed with an eminent mathematician named Hironaka."33 (Hironaka eventually wrote the conjecture up.) (Hironaka eventually wrote the conjecture up.)34 William Browder, who was also visiting at the Inst.i.tute that year, recalled: "Nash was working on real algebraic varieties. n.o.body else had been thinking about these problems." William Browder, who was also visiting at the Inst.i.tute that year, recalled: "Nash was working on real algebraic varieties. n.o.body else had been thinking about these problems."35 During the winter, Milnor, by now chairman of the department, and his colleagues became greatly impressed by "some extremely interesting ideas [of Nash's] in algebraic geometry."36 The new work sparked a wave of optimism and renewed a desire to help Nash. There was a growing feeling, both at the inst.i.tute and at the university, that Nash might well be able to resume his interrupted career. The new work sparked a wave of optimism and renewed a desire to help Nash. There was a growing feeling, both at the inst.i.tute and at the university, that Nash might well be able to resume his interrupted career. Milnor decided to offer Nash a one-year post as research mathematician and lecturer. In April 1964, Milnor tentatively proposed that Nash teach one course the following fall and perhaps two in the spring. Milnor decided to offer Nash a one-year post as research mathematician and lecturer. In April 1964, Milnor tentatively proposed that Nash teach one course the following fall and perhaps two in the spring.37 Milnor consulted Nash's psychiatrist, Howard Mele, who confirmed on March 30 that Nash was seeing him regularly for psychotherapy, noting that this was the first time that Nash had agreed to seek outpatient treatment since the onset of his illness.38 Garber recalled: "[Mele] tried to keep him on medication. He also helped Nash initiate relations.h.i.+ps with other people. In my experience, positive relations.h.i.+ps plus medrcation does wonders. 'Someone likes me': that's an experience that's almost impossible for a schizophrenic to have." Garber recalled: "[Mele] tried to keep him on medication. He also helped Nash initiate relations.h.i.+ps with other people. In my experience, positive relations.h.i.+ps plus medrcation does wonders. 'Someone likes me': that's an experience that's almost impossible for a schizophrenic to have."39 Mele felt that Nash's recovery was permanent and that he could handle one or two courses without difficulty during the next academic year. He went on to say: "I cannot guarantee his future mental health (any more than I could my own or that of anyone else), but I do feel strongly that a recurrence is unlikely in his case."40 Dean of Faculty Douglas Brown wrote to President Goheen, saying, "This is a special situation," adding that Nash "is now recovered... . He needs a chance to get back into teaching gradually and to re-establish his status."41 Brown said that the mathematics department unanimously supported the proposal. "I am strongly inclined to go along. It is a part of our job, I feel, in putting one of our most brilliant Ph.D.s back into top productivity." The appointment was made officially on May 1. Brown said that the mathematics department unanimously supported the proposal. "I am strongly inclined to go along. It is a part of our job, I feel, in putting one of our most brilliant Ph.D.s back into top productivity." The appointment was made officially on May 1.42 Sadly, just when things looked brightest, and despite all of Nash's hard work, Mele's support, and the outpouring of goodwill on the part of colleagues and the university, another storm was gathering. As early as February, Nash began complaining of sleeplessness and of his "mind [being] filled with the thought of performing imaginary computations of a meaningless sort."43 A comment, made in early March, that he had "avoided falling back into delusions" suggests that Nash was already being besieged by such thoughts. A comment, made in early March, that he had "avoided falling back into delusions" suggests that Nash was already being besieged by such thoughts.44 And by the end of that month, Nash, who said he still hoped for a reconciliation with Alicia, mentioned that he felt he might have to leave Princeton. And by the end of that month, Nash, who said he still hoped for a reconciliation with Alicia, mentioned that he felt he might have to leave Princeton.45 By the time the Princeton job was offered, Nash was already convinced that he ought to return to France, clear evidence that he was nowhere near as well as his behavior suggested.46 His letters home were sufficiently strange to alarm Martha, who contacted Mele. His letters home were sufficiently strange to alarm Martha, who contacted Mele.47 Mele was at first rea.s.suring; he wrote back that Nash was no longer taking medication, but that Nash was still in therapy and that the therapy seemed to be working well. Mele was at first rea.s.suring; he wrote back that Nash was no longer taking medication, but that Nash was still in therapy and that the therapy seemed to be working well.48 Nash also wrote rea.s.suringly, apparently in reply to questions from an anxious Virginia, that he was still seeing Mele. Nash also wrote rea.s.suringly, apparently in reply to questions from an anxious Virginia, that he was still seeing Mele.49 But around that time, Nash paid an unexpected call on his former French professor Karl Uitti. He appeared "rather anxious," Uitti recalled. "He said, 'I'm interested in getting the addresses of Jean Cocteau and Andre Gide. I have to write them letters.' I gently informed him that both Gide and Cocteau were dead and that writing letters to them would be impossible. Nash was very, very disappointed." that writing letters to them would be impossible. Nash was very, very disappointed."50 By May, Nash was complaining that he was having trouble working: "I have some ideas but many of them don't seem to work out."51 Nash had apparently been in touch with Grothendieck once more. Grothendieck evidently responded with an invitation to the IHES for the following year. At the beginning of the summer, Nash wrote to a colleague in Europe, saying that he wished to spend the following year in France rather than stay in Princeton and accept the university's offer."52 Nash complained of finding himself in a "troubled situation," saying that he had difficulty when he tried to work on mathematics, and also that his relations with various faculty and students at the university were troubled as well. It is not clear to whom or what he was referring - the job offer from the mathematics department had been supported unanimously by Milnor and the rest of the faculty and Nash's contacts with students were presumably limited to the Fine Hall common room. He wrote that he expected something to change by June 1, but that he wasn't certain of that, adding: "Si ma situation reste essentiellement la meme comme c'est de maintenant" (If my situation remains essentially the same as it is now), drawing a circle in the middle of the page accompanied by the parenthetical remark, "(Ici-compris ma situation de famille, etc., etc.)" (Including my family situation). He went on, "Et si je peux travailler effectivement aux mathematiques par le temps de l'automne, je pense que je devrais accepter l'offre de Grothendieck plutot que l'offre de l'Universite, s'il pourra encore me donner cet offre d'emploi" (And if I can work effectively at mathematics by the fall, I think I should accept Grothendieck's offer over the offer from the university, if he will still extend me this offer of employment).

As far as the inst.i.tute knew, Nash was planning to spend the entire summer at Fuld Hall, with the exception of about three weeks, before going to France in the fall. On May 24, in response to a note from Oppenheimer granting him funds for the summer "with the understanding that you will remain at the Inst.i.tute during the summer," Nash wrote that he planned to be away from June 22 through July 19 at a conference in Woods Hole on Cape Cod, organized by John Tate, on the theory of singularities, cla.s.sifications of surfaces and modules, Grothendieck coh.o.m.ology, zeta-functions, and arithmetic of Abelian varieties.53 According to Tate and other partic.i.p.ants, Nash never went to the conference. According to Tate and other partic.i.p.ants, Nash never went to the conference.54 Instead, he went to Europe. Instead, he went to Europe.

He sailed on the Queen Mary, Queen Mary, stopped briefly in London, and went to Paris. stopped briefly in London, and went to Paris.55 There he tried to get in touch with Grothendieck, who evidently wasn't in town. There he tried to get in touch with Grothendieck, who evidently wasn't in town.56 After hanging around a few more days, Nash flew to Rome. He was, as he later said, thinking of himself as a "great but secret religious figure." After hanging around a few more days, Nash flew to Rome. He was, as he later said, thinking of himself as a "great but secret religious figure."57 This may have This may have accounted for his desire to be in Rome, where, as he later said, he visited "the Forum and the catacombs but avoided the Vatican." accounted for his desire to be in Rome, where, as he later said, he visited "the Forum and the catacombs but avoided the Vatican."58 The Pope was, in any case, not in Rome at the time. The Pope was, in any case, not in Rome at the time.

He was standing in front of the Forum when he began to hear voices "like telepathic phone calls from private individuals."59 They seemed to him, at the time, he said in Madrid in 1996, to be the voices of "mathematicians opposed to my ideas." He wrote in a letter later in the 1960s: "I observed the local Romans show a considerable interest in getting into telephone booths and talking on the telephone and one of their favorite words was p.r.o.nto. So it's like ping-pong, pinging back again the bell pinged to me." They seemed to him, at the time, he said in Madrid in 1996, to be the voices of "mathematicians opposed to my ideas." He wrote in a letter later in the 1960s: "I observed the local Romans show a considerable interest in getting into telephone booths and talking on the telephone and one of their favorite words was p.r.o.nto. So it's like ping-pong, pinging back again the bell pinged to me."60 Something odd was happening, he concluded. Harold Kuhn later said, "The stream of words was obviously being fed into a central machine where they were translated into English. The machine inserted the words, now in English, into his brain." Something odd was happening, he concluded. Harold Kuhn later said, "The stream of words was obviously being fed into a central machine where they were translated into English. The machine inserted the words, now in English, into his brain."61 Nash, however, did send a postcard from Rome, dated September 1, saying that he was returning to Paris and that he had attempted to contact Grothendieck and other mathematicians.62 He said he would be staying at the Grand Hotel de Mont Blanc, where he and Alicia had stayed five years earlier. Two days later, he was back in Paris, but had not yet managed to see Grothendieck, who was apparently away. He said he would be staying at the Grand Hotel de Mont Blanc, where he and Alicia had stayed five years earlier. Two days later, he was back in Paris, but had not yet managed to see Grothendieck, who was apparently away.63 The staff at the IHES "suggested contacting Jean-Pierre Serre," but Serre does not remember Nash's ever getting in touch with him. The staff at the IHES "suggested contacting Jean-Pierre Serre," but Serre does not remember Nash's ever getting in touch with him.64 Nash's next postcard home was a collage: a card devoid of any writing, with a Parisian scene and a French coin and a long number for a return address. Nash's next postcard home was a collage: a card devoid of any writing, with a Parisian scene and a French coin and a long number for a return address.65 Meanwhile, Nash had not informed the mathematics department at Princeton that he was not intending to take their offer. Finally, on September 15, Tucker sent a terse note to Dean Brown, canceling the appointment and saying that Nash had gone to the University of Paris.66 Nash hung around Paris a few more weeks until he finally gave up. In mid-September, he wrote to Virginia from Paris that he would be returning on the Queen Mary Queen Mary on the twenty-fourth, adding a postscript: "Situation looks dismal." on the twenty-fourth, adding a postscript: "Situation looks dismal."67 Back in Princeton, Nash took to calling people again and turning up at the Inst.i.tute to write strange messages on the blackboards of various seminar rooms. Atle Selberg recalled one such message involving several Social Security numbers. "He tried to find mysterious patterns," Selberg recalled. "He claimed that he was born in a county named Mercer that had a town named Princeton. He seemed to find this a mysterious sign."68 By mid-December, Nash was back in Carrier. Once again, it was Alicia who had to make the painful decision. A letter written to John Milnor shows how fast Nash's thoughts were racing and how one a.s.sociation prompted another - even as Nash was conscious that Milnor would find the letter mad. Labeled "crazy letter for your entertainment," it was a fantastic monologue, skipping from slave calendars and lunar eclipses to advertising jingles and equations from Milnor's papers.69 Mele once again took over Nash's care and Nash once again responded quickly and dramatically to antipsychotic drugs. He was well enough in early April 1965 to leave Carrier for the day to attend a banquet with John Danskin at another game-theory conference in Princeton. quickly and dramatically to antipsychotic drugs. He was well enough in early April 1965 to leave Carrier for the day to attend a banquet with John Danskin at another game-theory conference in Princeton.70 As Danskin recalled, "Nash's name was being mentioned a lot at the meeting. I thought it would be nice to produce him." As Danskin recalled, "Nash's name was being mentioned a lot at the meeting. I thought it would be nice to produce him."71 Once Nash learned that he would be going, he telephoned Harold Kuhn and asked him to bring a couple of game-theory books to Carrier, which Kuhn did, recalling that "it was a barracks-like place, not much privacy." Once Nash learned that he would be going, he telephoned Harold Kuhn and asked him to bring a couple of game-theory books to Carrier, which Kuhn did, recalling that "it was a barracks-like place, not much privacy."72 Nash stayed on at Carrier until midsummer, his departure delayed until Mele was confident that both a job and a psychiatrist were waiting for his patient. Nash stayed on at Carrier until midsummer, his departure delayed until Mele was confident that both a job and a psychiatrist were waiting for his patient.

In April Richard Palais, a mathematician at Brandeis, drove down to the inst.i.tute to turn in a ma.n.u.script. "That day Borel said why not have lunch with Jack Milnor and me. We had lunch," he recalled.73 Halfway through they started talking about Nash. Milnor and Borel thought Nash was much better now. They thought it would be a good thing for him to gradually get back to academic life. They believed Boston would be a good place. MIT and Harvard would be too difficult after he had insisted on resigning from MIT and threatened to sue the university. The Harvard department was too small. There was no way they were going to hire him. The Inst.i.tute in those days didn't have five-year members.h.i.+ps, and it was almost unheard of to have someone more than two years. Halfway through they started talking about Nash. Milnor and Borel thought Nash was much better now. They thought it would be a good thing for him to gradually get back to academic life. They believed Boston would be a good place. MIT and Harvard would be too difficult after he had insisted on resigning from MIT and threatened to sue the university. The Harvard department was too small. There was no way they were going to hire him. The Inst.i.tute in those days didn't have five-year members.h.i.+ps, and it was almost unheard of to have someone more than two years.74 Norman Levinson, who had been in contact with Mele, Milnor, and Borel, offered to support Nash with his ONR and NSF grants. He felt that it was too soon for Nash to have an office at MIT Palais recalled: I had a feeling they were on the level in helping him get back to the mainstream and that it would be better for him to be in Cambridge, away from Princeton. It was very late. I'm surprised we were able to do anything. But the [Brandeis] administration really liked the math department and Joe [Kohn, then chairman] would go and get what we wanted.

There was a lot of that feeling [about Nash]. People were expecting an awful lot from this guy. In any four- or five-year span, there are one or two young bright people who are recognized as special. Everybody tries to get them. He was coming into that category. He was very special.75

When Nash got out of Carrier this time, in mid-July, he spent a couple of nights at John Milnor's house and then took a train to Boston.76 He was, once again, hopeful and, in contrast to a year earlier, accepted the likelihood that he might have to start a new life without Alicia. He was, once again, hopeful and, in contrast to a year earlier, accepted the likelihood that he might have to start a new life without Alicia.

CHAPTER 43

Solitude Boston, 196567 Boston, 196567

IT WAS STRANGE to be back in Boston alone and after an absence of half a dozen years. The city had changed almost as much as Nash himself. Sundays were the bleakest. Nash's "traditional Sunday[s]" as he called them, were spent alone, sitting in one of the libraries trying to work, or, more often, walking for hours at a time, and then stopping to watch the ice skaters and hockey players in the Public Garden. to be back in Boston alone and after an absence of half a dozen years. The city had changed almost as much as Nash himself. Sundays were the bleakest. Nash's "traditional Sunday[s]" as he called them, were spent alone, sitting in one of the libraries trying to work, or, more often, walking for hours at a time, and then stopping to watch the ice skaters and hockey players in the Public Garden.1 The evenings were given over, more often than not, to writing letters, one to Alicia, one to Virginia, and one to Martha, with whom Nash had lately developed a warmer, more confidential relations.h.i.+p. The evenings were given over, more often than not, to writing letters, one to Alicia, one to Virginia, and one to Martha, with whom Nash had lately developed a warmer, more confidential relations.h.i.+p.2 Mailing the letters provided an excuse for a final nighttime stroll. Mailing the letters provided an excuse for a final nighttime stroll.

Weekdays, when he commuted to Waltham in a ratty old Nash Rambler convertible purchased on his arrival in Boston, were better. He was almost enjoying being at Brandeis. The place was undeniably lively, full of former students and acquaintances from the old days in Cambridge, former MIT undergraduates like Joseph Kohn, now chairman of the math department, and Al Vasquez, now an a.s.sistant professor. He liked having an office again, going to seminars, eating lunch with other mathematicians, tossing around ideas and mathematical gossip.

But he was terribly lonely. He missed Alicia and John Charles. He felt his new, humbler status in the mathematical hierarchy most acutely. But he also could see, perhaps for the first time since the onset of his illness, that there was, after all, a future for him, and he entertained hopes of reestablis.h.i.+ng himself as an academic and even of finding someone new to share life with.

He had left Princeton almost immediately after being released from Carrier on July 29, traveling to Boston by train and staying in a Cambridge hotel while he found an apartment and a car.3 He had seen Norman Levinson, who, in his gruff, taciturn, immensely tactful way, had let Nash know that he would be paying Nash's salary with National Science Foundation and Navy grants, and that he hoped Nash would be able to pursue his own research ideas, as before. He would have no teaching responsibilities, at least in the fall, which was a relief. He had seen Norman Levinson, who, in his gruff, taciturn, immensely tactful way, had let Nash know that he would be paying Nash's salary with National Science Foundation and Navy grants, and that he hoped Nash would be able to pursue his own research ideas, as before. He would have no teaching responsibilities, at least in the fall, which was a relief.4 He started to see a thirty-three-year-old psychiatrist, Pattison Esmiol. An affable Coloradan with a medical degree from Harvard, Esmiol had just left the Navy to open a private practice in Brookline. Esmiol prescribed an antipsychotic drug, Stelazine, similar to Thorazine. Nash didn't like the drug and its side effects, worrying that they would prevent him from thinking clearly enough to resume mathematical work. But Esmiol, sympathetic to his client's concerns, kept the doses as low as possible, and Nash was grateful for the dependable human contact of his weekly appointments. Coloradan with a medical degree from Harvard, Esmiol had just left the Navy to open a private practice in Brookline. Esmiol prescribed an antipsychotic drug, Stelazine, similar to Thorazine. Nash didn't like the drug and its side effects, worrying that they would prevent him from thinking clearly enough to resume mathematical work. But Esmiol, sympathetic to his client's concerns, kept the doses as low as possible, and Nash was grateful for the dependable human contact of his weekly appointments.

Nash was seeing Eleanor and John David, now a tall, handsome boy of twelve, every week or so.5 Nash was glad for the dinners Eleanor cooked him and glad to have the company. The three of them spent Halloween together, he wrote to Virginia. Nash was glad for the dinners Eleanor cooked him and glad to have the company. The three of them spent Halloween together, he wrote to Virginia.6 However, the old tensions in his relations.h.i.+p with Eleanor quickly surfaced again, and there were new and unantic.i.p.ated tensions between himself and John David. Nash described Halloween as a "sad" occasion, for example, although it was not clear whether the sadness stemmed from friction that arose during the evening, or simply from a realization that his long separation from his son had produced a gulf that he could see no obvious way of bridging. John David was a particularly beautiful boy, musical and obviously bright. But Nash found it difficult to hide his dismay over his son's faulty grammar and indifferent performance in school - all John David had to do was to let a "you was" slip out and Nash would be all over him; However, the old tensions in his relations.h.i.+p with Eleanor quickly surfaced again, and there were new and unantic.i.p.ated tensions between himself and John David. Nash described Halloween as a "sad" occasion, for example, although it was not clear whether the sadness stemmed from friction that arose during the evening, or simply from a realization that his long separation from his son had produced a gulf that he could see no obvious way of bridging. John David was a particularly beautiful boy, musical and obviously bright. But Nash found it difficult to hide his dismay over his son's faulty grammar and indifferent performance in school - all John David had to do was to let a "you was" slip out and Nash would be all over him;7 this, of course led to flare-ups with Eleanor and a rekindling of all the old resentments. John Stier recalls his father's visits as "frustrating." "He was always humming," Stier said. "He'd eat. He'd chill out. He'd leave. He never helped me with my homework or asked how I was doing. He was just very aloof." this, of course led to flare-ups with Eleanor and a rekindling of all the old resentments. John Stier recalls his father's visits as "frustrating." "He was always humming," Stier said. "He'd eat. He'd chill out. He'd leave. He never helped me with my homework or asked how I was doing. He was just very aloof."8 Before he became a teenager and he and Eleanor began living in Hyde Park, John Stier lived in two dozen different places, with and without his mother.9 They included, between infancy and six, a series of foster homes in Ma.s.sachusetts and Rhode Island, an orphanage on the outskirts of Boston, and when finally reunited with Eleanor, the Charden Home for Women and Children, a home for the dest.i.tute (no boys over age nine allowed!). In some school years, he attended three new schools and was deemed a "behavior problem." On one occasion, he was held back. The moves were prompted by the calamities that are regular events in the lives of poor families: lost jobs, ill health, lack of childcare, fear of crime. On one occasion, Eleanor recalled, "I had a woman taking care of him. She said John had been bad to her little boy. So she hit him and gave him a black eye. I didn't work for a while. I was always on edge." They included, between infancy and six, a series of foster homes in Ma.s.sachusetts and Rhode Island, an orphanage on the outskirts of Boston, and when finally reunited with Eleanor, the Charden Home for Women and Children, a home for the dest.i.tute (no boys over age nine allowed!). In some school years, he attended three new schools and was deemed a "behavior problem." On one occasion, he was held back. The moves were prompted by the calamities that are regular events in the lives of poor families: lost jobs, ill health, lack of childcare, fear of crime. On one occasion, Eleanor recalled, "I had a woman taking care of him. She said John had been bad to her little boy. So she hit him and gave him a black eye. I didn't work for a while. I was always on edge."10 It was, as he said, "a miserable childhood, a s.h.i.+tty childhood."11 His mother loved him, of course, but was herself desperately unhappy. Eleanor was often ill, suffering at times from severe anemia, frequently lost jobs, and when she was working often held two jobs. John David's illegitimacy was a dirty secret; Eleanor concocted a tale to explain away his fatherlessness and the child was forced to tell it at the different schools and neighborhoods, while living in constant dread of discovery. "There was a real stigma," John Stier said. "I had to lie." His mother loved him, of course, but was herself desperately unhappy. Eleanor was often ill, suffering at times from severe anemia, frequently lost jobs, and when she was working often held two jobs. John David's illegitimacy was a dirty secret; Eleanor concocted a tale to explain away his fatherlessness and the child was forced to tell it at the different schools and neighborhoods, while living in constant dread of discovery. "There was a real stigma," John Stier said. "I had to lie."

In John David's eyes, however, his father's sudden reappearance in his life was a fine thing. Being corrected for the way he spoke and being admonished to work harder in school conveyed not just criticism, but fatherly interest. Nash also promised to pay for John David's college education, explaining that "his educational background will shape the whole future course of his life." Nash sometimes took pains to please his son. On Sat.u.r.days, he would take John Stier and a friend bowling. Afterward, they'd go to a Chinese restaurant for dinner. On John Stier's thirteenth birthday, Nash surprised him by taking him to a neighborhood bicycle shop and buying him a ten-speed racer. The next year, perhaps partly inspired by his father's interest in him, John Stier worked extremely hard in school, took a citywide examination, and got a place in one of Boston's elite "exam" schools.

In January, Nash wrote that "I have less time for Eleanor," hinting perhaps that he felt his early dependence on her company easing and feeling some relief on this account.12 This would have given Eleanor new grounds for grievance; she may well have felt that he was once again using her without much intention of giving her very much in return. But at the end of February, Eleanor and John David were "among my few social contacts." This would have given Eleanor new grounds for grievance; she may well have felt that he was once again using her without much intention of giving her very much in return. But at the end of February, Eleanor and John David were "among my few social contacts."13 There were repeated flare-ups. "Eleanor was not nice to me," he wrote after they went to a restaurant together. There were repeated flare-ups. "Eleanor was not nice to me," he wrote after they went to a restaurant together.14 In April when Eleanor moved to a new apartment, several days went by before she was willing to give him her new telephone number. In April when Eleanor moved to a new apartment, several days went by before she was willing to give him her new telephone number.15 In May there is another reference to Eleanor's not being nice, which again made Nash feel rather "sad." In May there is another reference to Eleanor's not being nice, which again made Nash feel rather "sad."16 If Nash's reappearance in Boston raised again the possibility of his marrying Eleanor - either in her mind or his - there is no hint of this in Nash's letters to Martha. Nash still had not completely given up hope of a reconciliation with Alicia. If Nash's reappearance in Boston raised again the possibility of his marrying Eleanor - either in her mind or his - there is no hint of this in Nash's letters to Martha. Nash still had not completely given up hope of a reconciliation with Alicia.

On that sad Halloween, he had been thinking a great deal of Alicia. "I was very fond of her," he wrote to Virginia.17 His sadness on that night probably had a good deal to do with the fact that she was discouraging him from visiting her in Princeton, as he had hoped to do, on Thanksgiving. She apparently put him off with excuses, citing among other things "propriety." His sadness on that night probably had a good deal to do with the fact that she was discouraging him from visiting her in Princeton, as he had hoped to do, on Thanksgiving. She apparently put him off with excuses, citing among other things "propriety."18 Nash persisted and Alicia continued to discourage him, so that a week before the holiday Nash said that he still had no invitation. Alicia was now talking of his coming down at Christmas, but it is not clear that the visit took place. In and amongst it all, perhaps because he was now aware of John David's discomfort around him, he expressed fear that his younger son, John Charles, was "forgetting his father." Nash persisted and Alicia continued to discourage him, so that a week before the holiday Nash said that he still had no invitation. Alicia was now talking of his coming down at Christmas, but it is not clear that the visit took place. In and amongst it all, perhaps because he was now aware of John David's discomfort around him, he expressed fear that his younger son, John Charles, was "forgetting his father."19 It was not all that easy to renew his old acquaintances.h.i.+ps, though he saw a bit of Arthur Mattuck and his wife, Joan, as well as Marvin and Gloria Minsky.20 People were kind but busy. He was anxious for anything to fill his evenings and went to a great many movies, plays, and concerts by himself. People were kind but busy. He was anxious for anything to fill his evenings and went to a great many movies, plays, and concerts by himself.21 Alicia, who continued gently to discourage any possibility of reconciliation, was encouraging him to find some female companions.h.i.+p. He wrote to Martha: "Alicia doesn't leave much Alicia, who continued gently to discourage any possibility of reconciliation, was encouraging him to find some female companions.h.i.+p. He wrote to Martha: "Alicia doesn't leave much hope." hope."22 In January, Nash was making awkward inquiries about dating. In January, Nash was making awkward inquiries about dating.23 He thought of inviting the Mattucks to his house for a meal and "making it a foursome." Jean Mattuck reintroduced him, apparently, to Emma Duchane, who later could recall none of this. He thought of inviting the Mattucks to his house for a meal and "making it a foursome." Jean Mattuck reintroduced him, apparently, to Emma Duchane, who later could recall none of this.24 He pursued Emma for several weeks, saying to Martha, "She's a good conversationalist, but she isn't pretty really," before discovering that Emma had a fiance. He pursued Emma for several weeks, saying to Martha, "She's a good conversationalist, but she isn't pretty really," before discovering that Emma had a fiance.

After seeing A Hard Day's Night A Hard Day's Night one Sunday afternoon in early November, he was seized by a terrible sense of regret that he poured into a poignant and introspective letter to Martha, full of references to the struggle between his "merciless superego" and "old simple me." This is the letter in which Nash referred to the "special friends.h.i.+ps" in his life and his realization, in 1959, of "how things had been." He admits that "away from contact with a few special sorts of individuals I am lost, lost completely in the wilderness... ." one Sunday afternoon in early November, he was seized by a terrible sense of regret that he poured into a poignant and introspective letter to Martha, full of references to the struggle between his "merciless superego" and "old simple me." This is the letter in which Nash referred to the "special friends.h.i.+ps" in his life and his realization, in 1959, of "how things had been." He admits that "away from contact with a few special sorts of individuals I am lost, lost completely in the wilderness... ."

Brandeis was lively. A post-Sputnik infusion of money and a commitment on the university's part to building a serious graduate program in mathematics had attracted eight or nine young comers, all in their thirties. "We had lots of research money. We had plenty of money to pay for research a.s.sociates and part-time instructors. We did everything together," recalled Richard Palais. infusion of money and a commitment on the university's part to building a serious graduate program in mathematics had attracted eight or nine young comers, all in their thirties. "We had lots of research money. We had plenty of money to pay for research a.s.sociates and part-time instructors. We did everything together," recalled Richard Palais.25 The atmosphere was friendly and informal, and Nash felt welcome there. "Everybody was well aware that he was a first-cla.s.s mathematician," said Palais, adding: The atmosphere was friendly and informal, and Nash felt welcome there. "Everybody was well aware that he was a first-cla.s.s mathematician," said Palais, adding: I ate with him most lunches. It was nice to see him more or less back. He was pretty sane. He was being treated with antipsychotic drugs. He was a much nicer person after he got sick than before. I kind of knew him when I was an instructor at Harvard, but not personally. I'd ask him a question. He'd be all snotty, proud of himself. You'd be afraid to ask him anything. He'd put you down without a thought. Typically, I'd say, "I have this problem," and Nash would shoot back, "Oh my G.o.d, how can you ask me this question? How stupid are you? How come you don't know this?" Afterward, he was nice, gentle, lots of fun to talk to. This old ego stuff was gone.

Vasquez has similar memories: "When Nash first showed up at Brandeis he was pretty zombielike. At the beginning, he said nothing. That changed over the course of the year. He got more and more normal. He started interacting with people. We mostly talked about mathematics. He never talked about his personal life."26 Nash's renewed appet.i.te for life was most evident in the energy with which he was able to work that year. During that fall at Brandeis he wrote a long paper, "a.n.a.lyticity of Solutions of Implicit Function Problems with a.n.a.lytic Data," of Solutions of Implicit Function Problems with a.n.a.lytic Data,"27 that pursued to their natural conclusion his ideas about partial differential equations. He circulated his draft for comments and submitted the paper to the that pursued to their natural conclusion his ideas about partial differential equations. He circulated his draft for comments and submitted the paper to the Annals of Mathematics Annals of Mathematics in early January. in early January.28 Armand Borel, one of the editors, sent it to Jurgen Moser to referee. After a few telephone consultations between Borel and Nash, Nash quickly revised the paper and got a final acceptance from the Armand Borel, one of the editors, sent it to Jurgen Moser to referee. After a few telephone consultations between Borel and Nash, Nash quickly revised the paper and got a final acceptance from the Annals Annals on February 15. Nash was thrilled, writing to Martha on Was.h.i.+ngton's birthday that the on February 15. Nash was thrilled, writing to Martha on Was.h.i.+ngton's birthday that the Annals Annals was "the most prestigious American mathematical journal." was "the most prestigious American mathematical journal."29 His renewed productivity produced a rush of self-confidence. He went to see Oscar Zariski at Harvard to discuss some new ideas - and possibly to inquire about a visiting position. He made friends with a young German mathematician, Egbert Brieskorn, who was visiting at MIT that year. He showed Brieskorn his just-completed paper and talked over ideas for future work. Brieskorn was doing some interesting work in singularities. "Nash had interesting ideas," Brieskorn recalled. "He was always making propositions about what one could do. But I always got the feeling that he either couldn't or wouldn't do them himself."'30 A touch of Nash's old arrogance returned. There was some talk, apparently, of his teaching at Northeastern in the spring. "I'd rather be at a more famous place," he confided to Martha. He thought he would apply for a position at MIT instead. He wrote Martha that he felt MIT ought to reinstate him, adding, "Of course, MIT isn't the most distinguished ... Harvard ranks much higher." A touch of Nash's old arrogance returned. There was some talk, apparently, of his teaching at Northeastern in the spring. "I'd rather be at a more famous place," he confided to Martha. He thought he would apply for a position at MIT instead. He wrote Martha that he felt MIT ought to reinstate him, adding, "Of course, MIT isn't the most distinguished ... Harvard ranks much higher."31 Throughout the spring he would fret about being forced to take a position at a second-rate inst.i.tution: "I hope to avoid stepping down in social status because it may be difficult to come up again." Throughout the spring he would fret about being forced to take a position at a second-rate inst.i.tution: "I hope to avoid stepping down in social status because it may be difficult to come up again."

As early as the beginning of February, Nash had an idea for a second paper, but two weeks later he wrote to Martha that he was "sad because part of my new math idea fell apart."32 He was able, however, to take the disappointment in stride, and by early April he was already working on another paper on the "canonical resolution of singularities." Many years later he would call this effort "more interesting" than his 1966 He was able, however, to take the disappointment in stride, and by early April he was already working on another paper on the "canonical resolution of singularities." Many years later he would call this effort "more interesting" than his 1966 Annals Annals paper. In May he gave a seminar on the subject at Brandeis, and by the end of the month he had completed a draft that he showed to Brieskorn for comments. paper. In May he gave a seminar on the subject at Brandeis, and by the end of the month he had completed a draft that he showed to Brieskorn for comments.33 Nash quite likely submitted this paper to the Nash quite likely submitted this paper to the Annals Annals as well, but it was never published. as well, but it was never published.34 A copy finally wound up in Fine Hall Library at Princeton in September 1968. It was regularly cited in the succeeding years and was ultimately published in the A copy finally wound up in Fine Hall Library at Princeton in September 1968. It was regularly cited in the succeeding years and was ultimately published in the Duke Journal of Mathematics Duke Journal of Mathematics in 1995 in a special issue in honor of Nash. in 1995 in a special issue in honor of Nash.

The quality of these two papers - the first of which geometer Mikhail Gromov calls "amazing"35 - const.i.tutes the single strongest reason for questioning Nash's diagnosis of paranoid schizophrenia. - const.i.tutes the single strongest reason for questioning Nash's diagnosis of paranoid schizophrenia.36 Producing papers that broke new ground was a remarkable feat for someone who had, by 1965, been psychotic for most of six years and suffered substantial memory impairment. Producing papers that broke new ground was a remarkable feat for someone who had, by 1965, been psychotic for most of six years and suffered substantial memory impairment.37 Unlike manic depression, paranoid schizophrenia rarely allows sufferers to return, even for a limited period, to their pre-morbid level of achievement, or so it is believed.' Unlike manic depression, paranoid schizophrenia rarely allows sufferers to return, even for a limited period, to their pre-morbid level of achievement, or so it is believed.'38 However, at least one other mathematician with chronic schizophrenia was able, during a brief However, at least one other mathematician with chronic schizophrenia was able, during a brief remission, to produce excellent work, remission, to produce excellent work,39 and Nash's papers, though superb, were not as ambitious as those that he had planned to write before he became ill. and Nash's papers, though superb, were not as ambitious as those that he had planned to write before he became ill.

At the end of June, Nash moved into Joe Kohn's apartment at 38 Parker Street in a two-family house not far from Harvard Square.40 Kohn was off for a year's sabbatical in Ecuador. The sublet was arranged by f.a.gi Levinson, who recalled: "Everybody wanted to help Nash. His was a mind too good to waste." Kohn was off for a year's sabbatical in Ecuador. The sublet was arranged by f.a.gi Levinson, who recalled: "Everybody wanted to help Nash. His was a mind too good to waste."41 Nash enrolled in Operation Match, a Cambridge computer dating service. He was going on blind dates, acutely aware that "I'll need to learn how to behave properly and be polite etc." He wrote that he was "hopeful and optimistic": "I think I'll develop some good friends and I'll get remarried if not to Alicia and then I'll have a happy family life."42 He had an appointment at MIT lined up for the fall: Ted Martin had offered to let him teach a senior seminar in game theory. In May Nash wrote to Kuhn saying that he wanted to "collect appropriate materials and learn about the more recent developments" in game theory and asking Kuhn for suggestions. He had an appointment at MIT lined up for the fall: Ted Martin had offered to let him teach a senior seminar in game theory. In May Nash wrote to Kuhn saying that he wanted to "collect appropriate materials and learn about the more recent developments" in game theory and asking Kuhn for suggestions.43 Something, however, was no longer quite right. Some of his colleagues at Brandeis recalled an abrupt change sometime in the late spring. Palais recalled: "He sort of lost his ba