The Dominant Strain Part 40
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She shrank from before the words she had been dreading for so long.
"Don't!" she begged him.
"But I must." His voice was steady now. "We both of us know the truth, and the time has come when we can acknowledge it. I have waited long, dear, long and patiently. For fifteen months, I have left you to yourself and to the past. Now it is time for the future. I have come home, Beatrix, to marry you at last."
Before the glad tenderness that thrilled in his tone, she sank back in her deep chair and buried her face in her hands. Thayer waited quietly, patiently. He had told his story; he could afford to wait for her answer, since he never doubted what it was to be. The silence between them lasted for moments. From upstairs in another part of the house, there came a fretful childish cry. Then the stillness dropped again. At length, Beatrix let her hands fall into her lap. There was an instant of utter listlessness; then quietly she rose and stood facing him, drawn to her full height. Her cheeks were white, her eyes unstained by any tears, her voice quite level.
"I am sorry," she said slowly; "but what you ask is impossible."
He started, as if struck with a lash.
"What do you mean?"
"That I cannot marry you."
He stared at her in amazement, while the color left his cheeks and then rushed again to his temples where the veins stood out like knotted cords. For the moment, he was angry, baffled by the shock of her unexpected answer. Then he mastered himself.
"Do you not love me any longer?" he asked.
"Any longer?" Her tone sought to express haughty disdain; but her eyes drooped before the fire in his own.
"Never mind the words," he said sharply. "In times like this, one can't stop to pick for rhetorical effects. It is enough that I love you with all the manhood there is in me, and that for months I have counted upon winning your love in return. And now--"
She interrupted him.
"And now you have found out your mistake," she said sadly.
"Yes." There was a long interval of silence, before he added, "And is this final?"
"It is." Her stiffened lips could scarcely form the words.
He turned to go away. All the alertness which had marked his coming had dropped away from him. He moved slowly and with drooping shoulders.
Already his face had grown haggard underneath the bronzing of his sea voyage. Beatrix stood motionless, watching him, struggling to master herself, to hold herself firmly to her resolve which had been taking shape within her, during all that past winter and spring.
Halfway across the room, Thayer hesitated, turned and came back to her side.
"Beatrix," he said impetuously; "we may as well face this thing squarely. It won't be the first time. We didn't wreck the future then; we mustn't do it now. The cases are different, though. This time, the danger lies in half-truths. We must speak plainly."
She attempted to check him; but, for the once, she was powerless to stem the tide of his words, and he hurried on,--
"We loved each other. There is no disloyalty to Lorimer in admitting it now. He belonged to the past, and, in that past, you belonged to him.
The past is over and ended now, and, for the future, we must belong to each other. It is for that that I am here."
She tried in vain to control her voice. Then she shook her head.
"What has come between us?" he demanded. "You did love me. Look up, Beatrix! Yes, your eyes tell the truth about it. You love me now; I am here to prove it, and to marry you in spite of yourself."
Gently she put away his arms and faced him.
"No. It is impossible."
He wavered before the finality of her tone.
"But you love me," he urged.
She was silent, and stood with her eyes fixed on the floor at his feet.
Then, of a sudden, she raised her eyes to his, and Thayer was dazzled by the light that was s.h.i.+ning in them.
"Yes," she answered, with a quiet dignity which he could not gainsay.
"And that is the very reason that I will not marry you. I love you too well--so well that I can never allow you to become the father of Sidney Lorimer's child."
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
"I believe my world is overcrowded," Sally said, one January afternoon, two years later.
"Arlt, why don't you take the hint?" Bobby asked languidly. "I am too comfortable to stir, and she evidently wishes to get rid of somebody."
"Possibly she means me; but I was the last to come, so I shall outstay you both," Miss Gannion said, laughing. "At least, Sally, your hospitality does you credit."
With leisurely fingers, Sally was opening her teaball; but Bobby interposed.
"I wouldn't make any tea for us, Sally. I know you are afraid it may not hold out for your crowded universe, and we three have been here often enough to have dispelled any illusions about the quality of your cups.
Two are cracked, and one has a nick exactly in the spot where we drink.
I suspect Arlt of having cut his wisdom teeth on it."
"Only women cut their wisdom teeth on a teacup," Miss Gannion observed.
"But really, Sally, I would save my tea until the crowd shows itself."
Sally shook her head.
"You interrupted me in the midst of my thesis."
Bobby interrupted again.
"It is our only chance to get in a word. We have to insert its thin edge at a comma, or else keep still. You never have any conversational semicolons, to say nothing of periods."
"As I was saying," Sally repeated pertinaciously; "my world is overcrowded. I have so many acquaintances that I never get time to enjoy my friends."
"What about now?" Bobby queried. "Here are we, and here is time. Which is lacking: enjoyment, or friends.h.i.+p?"
"Oh, this is an interlude, and doesn't count. We shall just get into the midst of a little rational conversation, though, and two or three stupid people will come in and reduce us to talking about the weather."
"You might send out cards," Arlt suggested, with the hesitating accent which was so characteristic of him. "Why not announce that on Tuesdays you are at home to clever people and friends only?"
"Yes; but it is no subject for joking," Sally persisted. "Last Tuesday in all that storm, for the first time this winter, Mr. Thayer came to see me. I know how busy he is, and I was just preparing to make the most of his call, when Mrs. Stanley came swis.h.i.+ng and creaking into the room, and she babbled about her servants and her lumbago until Mr. Thayer took his departure. I wanted to administer poison."
The Dominant Strain Part 40
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The Dominant Strain Part 40 summary
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