Adam Johnstone's Son Part 29
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"I'm glad of that," he said. "I'm glad that it has all come out on the same day. He knows everything, and he has told me everything. I don't know how it's all going to end, but I want you to believe one thing. If he had guessed the truth, he would never have said a word of love to her. He's not that kind of boy. You do believe me, don't you?"
"Yes, I believe you. But the worst of it is that she cares for him too--in a way I can't understand. She has some reason, or she thinks she has, for disliking him, as she calls it. She wouldn't tell me. But she cares for him all the same. She has told him, though she won't tell me.
There is something horrible in the idea of our children falling in love with each other."
Mrs. Bowring spoke quietly, but her pale face and nervous mouth told more than her words.
Sir Adam explained to her shortly what had happened on the first evening after Brook's arrival, and how Clare had heard it all, sitting in the shadow just above the platform. Mrs. Bowring listened in silence, covering her eyes with her hands. There was a long pause after he had finished speaking, but still she said nothing.
"I should like him to marry her," said Sir Adam at last, in a low voice.
She started and looked at him uneasily, remembering how well she had once loved him, and how he had broken her heart when she was young. He met her eyes quietly.
"You don't know him," he said. "He loves her, and he will be to her--what I wasn't to you."
"How can you say that he loves her? Three weeks ago he loved that Mrs.
Crosby."
"He? He never cared for her--not even at first."
"He was all the more heartless and bad to make her think that he did."
"She never thought so, for a moment. She wanted my money, and she thought that she could catch him."
"Perhaps--I saw her, and I did not like her face. She had the look of an adventuress about her. That doesn't change the main facts. Your son and she were--flirting, to say the least of it, three weeks ago. And now he thinks himself in love with my daughter. It would be madness to trust such a man--even if there were not the rest to hinder their marriage.
Adam--I told you that I forgave you. I have forgiven you--G.o.d knows. But you broke my life at the beginning like a thread. You don't know all there has been to forgive--indeed, you don't. And you are asking me to risk Clare's life in your son's hands, as I risked mine in yours. It's too much to ask."
"But you say yourself that she loves him."
"She cares for him--that was what I said. I don't believe in love as I did. You can't expect me to."
She turned her face away from him, but he saw the bitterness in it, and it hurt him. He waited a moment before he answered her.
"Don't visit my sins on your daughter, Lucy," he said at last. "Don't forget that love was a fact before you and I were born, and will be a fact long after we are dead. If these two love each other, let them marry. I hope that Clare is like you, but don't take it for granted that Brook is like me. He's not. He's more like his mother."
"And your wife?" said Mrs. Bowring suddenly. "What would she say to this?"
"My wife," said Sir Adam, "is a practical woman."
"I never was. Still--if I knew that Clare loved him--if I could believe that he could love her faithfully--what could I do? I couldn't forbid her to marry him. I could only pray that she might be happy, or at least that she might not break her heart."
"You would probably be heard, if anybody is. And a man must believe in G.o.d to explain your existence," added Sir Adam, in a gravely meditative tone. "It's the best argument I know."
CHAPTER XIV
Brook Johnstone had gone to his room when he had left his father, and was hastily packing his belongings, for he had made up his mind to leave Amalfi at once without consulting anybody. It is a special advantage of places where there is no railway that one can go away at a moment's notice, without waiting tedious hours for a train. Brook did not hesitate, for it seemed to him the only right thing to do, after Clare's refusal, and after what his father had told him. If she had loved him, he would have stayed in spite of every opposition. If he had never been told her mother's history, he would have stayed and would have tried to make her love him. As it was, he set his teeth and said to himself that he would suffer a good deal rather than do anything more to win the heart of Mrs. Bowring's daughter. He would get over it somehow in the end. He fancied Clare's horror if she should ever know the truth, and his fear of hurting her was as strong as his love. He made no phrases to himself, and he thought of nothing theatrical which he should like to say. He just set his teeth and packed his clothes alone. Possibly he swore rather unmercifully at the coat which would not fit into the right place, and at the starched s.h.i.+rt-cuffs which would not lie flat until he smashed them out of shape with unsteady hands.
When he was ready, he wrote a few words to Clare. He said that he was going away immediately, and that it would be very kind of her to let him say good-bye. He sent the note by a servant, and waited in the corridor at a distance from her door.
A moment later she came out, very pale.
"You are not really going, are you?" she asked, with wide and startled eyes. "You can't be in earnest?"
"I'm all ready," he answered, nodding slowly. "It's much better. I only wanted to say good-bye, you know. It's awfully kind of you to come out."
"Oh--I wouldn't have--" but she checked herself, and glanced up and down the long corridor. "We can't talk here," she added.
"It's so hot outside," said Brook, remembering how she had complained of the heat an hour earlier.
"Oh no--I mean--it's no matter. I'd rather go out for a moment."
She began to walk towards the door while she was speaking. They reached it in silence, and went out into the blazing sun. Clare had Brook's note still in her hand, and held it up to s.h.i.+eld the glare from the side of her face as they crossed the platform. Then she realised that she had brought him to the very spot whereon he had said good-bye to Lady Fan.
She stopped, and he stood still beside her.
"Not here," she said.
"No--not here," he answered.
"There's too much sun--really," said she, as the colour rose faintly in her cheeks.
"It's only to say good-bye," Brook answered sadly. "I shall always remember you just as you are now--with the sun s.h.i.+ning on your hair."
It was so bright that it dazzled him as he looked. In spite of the heat she did not move, and their eyes met.
"Mr. Johnstone," Clare began, "please stay. Please don't let me feel that I have sent you away." There was a shade of timidity in the tone, and the eyes seemed brave enough to say something more. Brook hesitated.
"Well--no--it isn't that exactly. I've heard something--my father has told me something since I saw you--"
He stopped short and looked down.
"What have you heard?" she asked. "Something dreadful about us?"
"About us all--about him, princ.i.p.ally. I can't tell you. I really can't."
"About him--and my mother? That they were married and separated?"
The steady innocent eyes had waited for him to look up again. He started as he heard her words.
"You don't mean to say that you know it too?" he cried. "Who has dared to tell you?"
"My mother--she was quite right. It's wrong to hide such things--she ought to have told me at once. Why shouldn't I have known it?"
"Doesn't it seem horrible to you? Don't you dislike me more than ever?"
"No. Why should I? It wasn't your fault. What has it to do with you? Or with me? Is that the reason why you are going away so suddenly?"
Adam Johnstone's Son Part 29
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Adam Johnstone's Son Part 29 summary
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