Love and Mr. Lewisham Part 25

"Church of England. Every man in this country who has not dissented belongs to the Church of England. It'll be hard enough to get you anything without that."

"But--" said Mr. Lewisham. "It's lying."

"Legal fiction," said Mr. Blenders.h.i.+n. "Everyone understands. If you don't do that, my dear chap, we can't do anything for you. It's Journalism, or London docks. Well, considering your experience,--say docks."

Lewisham's face flushed irregularly. He did not answer. He scowled and tugged at the still by no means ample moustache.

"Compromise, you know," said Mr. Blenders.h.i.+n, watching him kindly. "Compromise."

For the first time in his life Lewisham faced the necessity of telling a lie in cold blood. He glissaded from, the austere alt.i.tudes of his self-respect, and his next words were already disingenuous.

"I won't promise to tell lies if I'm asked," he said aloud. "I can't do that."

"Scratch it out," said Blenders.h.i.+n to the clerk. "You needn't mention it. Then you don't say you can teach drawing."

"I can't," said Lewisham.

"You just give out the copies," said Blenders.h.i.+n, "and take care they don't see you draw, you know."

"But that's not teaching drawing--"

"It's what's understood by it in _this_ country," said Blenders.h.i.+n.

"Don't you go corrupting your mind with pedagogueries. They're the ruin of a.s.sistants. Put down drawing. Then there's shorthand--"

"Here, I say!" said Lewisham.

"There's shorthand, French, book-keeping, commercial geography, land measuring--"

"But I can't teach any of those things!"

"Look here," said Blenders.h.i.+n, and paused. "Has your wife or you a private income?"

"No," said Lewisham.

"Well?"

A pause of further moral descent, and a whack against an obstacle.

"But they will find me out," said Lewisham.

Blenders.h.i.+n smiled. "It's not so much ability as willingness to teach, you know. And _they_ won't find you out. The sort of schoolmaster we deal with can't find anything out. He can't teach any of these things himself--and consequently he doesn't believe they _can_ be taught.

Talk to him of pedagogics and he talks of practical experience. But he puts 'em on his prospectus, you know, and he wants 'em on his time-table. Some of these subjects--There's commercial geography, for instance. What _is_ commercial geography?"

"Barilla," said the a.s.sistant, biting the end of his pen, and added pensively, "_and_ blethers."

"Fad," said Blenders.h.i.+n, "Just fad. Newspapers talk rot about commercial education, Duke of Devons.h.i.+re catches on and talks ditto--pretends he thought it himself--much _he_ cares--parents get hold of it--schoolmasters obliged to put something down, consequently a.s.sistants must. And that's the end of the matter!"

"_All_ right," said Lewisham, catching his breath in a faint sob of shame, "Stick 'em down. But mind--a non-resident place."

"Well," said Blenders.h.i.+n, "your science may pull you through. But I tell you it's hard. Some grant-earning grammar school may want that. And that's about all, I think. Make a note of the address...."

The a.s.sistant made a noise, something between a whistle and the word "Fee." Blenders.h.i.+n glanced at Lewisham and nodded doubtfully.

"Fee for booking," said the a.s.sistant; "half a crown, postage--in advance--half a crown."

But Lewisham remembered certain advice Dunkerley had given him in the old Whortley days. He hesitated. "No," he said. "I don't pay that. If you get me anything there's the commission--if you don't--"

"We lose," supplied the a.s.sistant.

"And you ought to," said Lewisham. "It's a fair game."

"Living in London?" asked Blenders.h.i.+n.

"Yes," said the clerk.

"That's all right," said Mr. Blenders.h.i.+n. "We won't say anything about the postage in that case. Of course it's the off season, and you mustn't expect anything at present very much. Sometimes there's a s.h.i.+ft or so at Easter.... There's nothing more.... Afternoon. Anyone else, Binks?"

Messrs. Maskelyne, Smith, and Thrums did a higher cla.s.s of work than Blenders.h.i.+n, whose specialities were lower cla.s.s private establishments and the cheaper sort of endowed schools. Indeed, so superior were Maskelyne, Smith, and Thrums that they enraged Lewisham by refusing at first to put him on their books. He was interviewed briefly by a young man dressed and speaking with offensive precision, whose eye adhered rigidly to the waterproof collar throughout the interview.

"Hardly our line," he said, and pushed Lewisham a form to fill up. "Mostly upper cla.s.s and good preparatory schools here, you know."

As Lewisham filled up the form with his mult.i.tudinous "'ologies" and "'ographies," a youth of ducal appearance entered and greeted the precise young man in a friendly way. Lewisham, bending down to write, perceived that this professional rival wore a very long frock coat, patent leather boots, and the most beautiful grey trousers. His conceptions of compet.i.tion enlarged. The precise young man by a motion of his eyes directed the newcomer's attention to Lewisham's waterproof collar, and was answered by raised eyebrows and a faint tightening of the mouth. "That bounder at Castleford has answered me," said the new-comer in a fine rich voice. "Is he any bally good?"

When the bounder at Castleford had been discussed Lewisham presented his paper, and the precise young man with his eye still fixed on the waterproof collar took the doc.u.ment in the manner of one who reaches across a gulf. "I doubt if we shall be able to do anything for you,"

he said rea.s.suringly. "But an English masters.h.i.+p may chance to be vacant. Science doesn't count for much in _our_ sort of schools, you know. Cla.s.sics and good games--that's our sort of thing."

"I see," said Lewisham.

"Good games, good form, you know, and all that sort of thing."

"I see," said Lewisham.

"You don't happen to be a public-school boy?" asked the precise young man.

"No," said Lewisham.

"Where were you educated?"

Lewisham's face grew hot. "Does that matter?" he asked, with his eye on the exquisite grey trousering.

"In our sort of school--decidedly. It's a question of tone, you know."

"I see," said Lewisham, beginning to realise new limitations. His immediate impulse was to escape the eye of the nicely dressed a.s.sistant master. "You'll write, I suppose, if you have anything," he said, and the precise young man responded with alacrity to his door-ward motion.

"Often get that kind of thing?" asked the nicely dressed young man when Lewisham had departed.

"Rather. Not quite so bad as that, you know. That waterproof collar--did you notice it? Ugh! And--'I see.' And the scowl and the clumsiness of it. Of course _he_ hasn't any decent clothes--he'd go to a new shop with one tin box! But that sort of thing--and board school teachers--they're getting everywhere! Only the other day--Rowton was here."

"Not Rowton of Pinner?"