Wee Wifie Part 32

"I was not with her when she breathed her last. Minnie had coaxed me away on some pretext or other, and when I became restless and miserable, she took me in her kind arms, and with the tears streaming from her eyes, told the truth.

"Fern, sometimes when I shut my eyes I can recall that scene now.

"I can see a child crouching in a corner of the big gaudy salon where a parrot was screaming in a gilded cage, a forlorn miserable child, with her face hidden in her hands and crying as though her little heart would break.

"I remember even now with grat.i.tude how good the Stanforths were to me. Minnie had a little bed placed beside hers, and would often wake up in the middle of the night to soothe and comfort me, when I started from some dream in a paroxysm of childish terror and grief. Young as I was I so fretted and pined after my mother, that if we had stayed longer in Paris I should have been ill; but, as soon as the funeral was over, we started for England.

"Uncle Rolf had been prevented, by an attack of gout, coming to the funeral, but he wrote to Mrs. Stanforth giving her full instructions, and promised that if possible he would meet us at Dover.

"It was early one November morning, as I lay listlessly in my berth, that I was aroused by the noise overhead. Was the brief voyage over, I wondered; had we reached England so soon? and, weak as I was, I crawled on deck, full of languid curiosity, to see my father's country. But the first glimpse disappointed me--a leaden sea, white chalky cliffs, and a gray sky, with black ugly-looking buildings and s.h.i.+ps looming out of a damp mist; this was all I could see of Old England. And I was turning away disconsolately when Mrs. Stanforth came up to me with a tall gentleman with a kind, brown, wrinkled face and a gray mustache.

"'Here is your little niece, Colonel Ferrers,' I heard her say in her pleasant clipping voice; 'poor little dear, she has fretted herself almost to death for her mother.' Then as I hung back, rather shyly, I felt myself lifted in my uncle's arms.

"'Little Crystal,' he said, gently, and I thought I felt a tear on my face as he kissed me, 'my poor Edmund's child.' And then, stroking my hair, 'But you shall come home with me and be my dear little daughter;' and then, as the kind hand fondled me, I crept nearer and hid my face in his coat. Dear Uncle Rolf, I loved him from that moment. The rest of the day seemed like a dream.

"We were speeding through a strange unknown country, past fields and hedge-rows, and stretches of smooth uplands, ugly plowed lands and patches of gray sullen gloom that resembled the sea.

"Now I was gazing out blankly at the dreary landscape, and now nodding drowsily on my uncle's shoulder, till all at once we stopped under some dark trees, and a voice very close to me said, 'Let me lift her out, father.' And then some one carried me into a sudden blaze of light; and all at once I found myself in a large pleasant room with some sweet-smelling wood burning on the hearth, and a girl with dead-brown curls sewing at a little table with a white china lamp on it.

"The strong arms that had carried me in and put me on the sofa, and were now bungling over the fastenings of my heavy cloak, belonged to a tall youth with a pleasant face, that somehow attracted me.

"'Come and help me, Maggie,' he said, laughing, and then the fair, mild face of Margaret bent over me.

"'Poor child, how tired she looks, Raby,' I heard her whisper, 'and so cold, too, the darling;' and then she knelt down beside me and chafed my hands, and talked to me kindly; and Raby brought me some hot coffee, and stood watching me drink it, looking down at me with his vivid dark eyes, those kind, beautiful eyes--oh, Raby, Raby!" and here for a moment Crystal buried her face in her hands, and Fern was grieved to see the tears were streaming through her fingers.

"Do not go on if it troubles you," she said, gently; "I am interested, oh, so interested in that poor little lonely child; but if it pains you to recall those days, you shall not distress yourself for me."

"Yes--yes--I wish to tell it, only give me one moment." And for a little while she wept bitterly; then drying her eyes, she went on in a broken voice:

"Ah, I was not lonely long; thank G.o.d, there is nothing more transitory than a child's grief, deep and inconsolable as it first appears.

"I did not forget my mother--I do not forget her now, but in a short time I threw off all traces of sadness. The change, the novelty of my life, the unfailing kindness that I experienced, soon worked a beneficial effect on my health and spirits. In a little while I ceased to regret Italy and its blue skies--and the Grange with its dear inmates became my world.

"But it was Raby who was my chief friend--my favorite playfellow.

"I loved Uncle Rolf; child as I was, I very soon learned to reverence that simple, kindly nature--that loyal heart; and Margaret was like a dear elder sister; but it was Raby who from the first became my master and my companion; Raby who instructed and reproved and praised me; whose frown was my worst punishment; whose smile was my reward.

"It was he who implanted in me a thirst for knowledge; all the leisure moments he could s.n.a.t.c.h from his own studies were devoted to mine.

During his college terms he corresponded with me, and planned out my work during his absence, sparing himself neither time nor pains; and from the night he carried me in, poor, weary child, to the light and radiance of his peaceful home--he seemed to have adopted me peculiarly, until it came to be understood at the Grange that Crystal was Raby's darling and belonged especially to him.

"I think that if Margaret had not been endowed with that singular unselfishness that belonged to her nature, she must have missed something out of her life; once she had been everything to her brother, but now it was Crystal! Crystal who must bring him his books, and hunt out the words in the dictionary. Crystal who must tidy his papers and lay the little spray of flowers beside his plate at breakfast. Crystal who must go with him on his rounds among the sick and aged--for true to the priestly office to which he proposed to dedicate himself, the young under-graduate already devoted a portion of his time to deeds of charity. Little by little in my childish selfishness I stole from her her sweetest privileges; the many little offices with which a loving woman delights to minister to the objects of her affection, be they father, brother or husband.

"I took the stool at his feet, the low chair at his side, but she never complained; for the brother and sister understood each other most truly. In their quiet looks, I have read a mutual a.s.surance that spoke of perfect trust and undiminished affection; Margaret could never be jealous of Raby, or Raby of Margaret.

"Raby had very peculiar notions on the subject of female education.

"Mine, for example, was carried on in rather a desultory fas.h.i.+on. I was not fretted by restraint, or made stupid by long tasks; just sufficient knowledge was imparted to excite my reasoning powers and arouse the desire for more. 'Let her learn,' he would say, 'but let her learn as the bird learns to sing.' And when Margaret, in her gentle way, sighed over my lamentable ignorance of all feminine acquirements and household method:

"'Let her be,' he would reply, with masculine preremptoriness, 'we must not force nature. When the time comes for her womanly instincts to develop, not an English matron or even our own clever Margaret will excel Crystal then.' And still, more strange to say, he rather stimulated than repressed my vanity; and so I grew up quite conscious of my own personal attractions; but without the knowledge having undue weight with me.

"From the first he would have me dressed in the quaint, rich style in which I came to them first.

"'It suits her peculiar style of beauty,' I heard him once say, when Margaret remonstrated with him on the extravagance of the idea. I was curled up on the window-seat, reading, and they did not think I was listening.

"'Raby is right,' observed Uncle Rolf; 'she will never make a quiet-looking English girl like our Maggie here--were you to dress her as a Puritan or a Quaker; ah, she will break hearts enough, I'll warrant, with those dark, witch eyes of hers; we must be careful of the child! If Bianca's beauty were like her daughter's, one can not wonder much at poor Edmund's choice.'

"Something in my uncle's speech aroused my childish petulance. I closed my book and came forward.

"'I don't want to break any hearts!' I cried, angrily; 'I only want Raby's--I am going to belong to Raby all my life, I will never leave him, never!' and I stamped my foot in a little fury.

"They all laughed, Uncle Rolf long and merrily, but Raby colored up as he smiled.

"'That's right, darling,' he said, in a low voice. 'Now go back to your book.' And I went at once obediently.

"When I bade him good-night that evening, and stood lingering by his chair on some pretext or other, he suddenly took hold of me and drew me toward him.

"'Little Crystal,' he said, 'you think you love Raby indeed; I am sure you do, and Heaven knows how sweet your childish affection is to me; but do you know--will you ever know how Raby loves you?' and putting his hands on my head he bade G.o.d bless my innocent face, and let me go.

"Oh, those delicious days of my childhood. But they are gone--they are gone! Long rambles on the sea-sh.o.r.e with Margaret, and in the corn-fields with Raby; now nutting in the copse or gathering brier roses in the lanes; setting out our strawberry feast under the great elm-tree on the lawn or picking up fir-cones in the Redmond avenue.

Spring flowers and autumn sunsets--bright halcyon days of my youth made glorious with love.

"For as yet no shadow of the future had fallen upon me, no taint of that inherited pa.s.sion had revealed itself; perhaps nothing had occurred to rouse the dormant temper lulled by the influences of this happy home. But the time came soon enough. Shalt I ever forget that day?

"It was during the Easter vacation--I must have been nearly thirteen then. Raby had been unwell; some low, feverish attack had seized him, and he was just ill enough to lie on the sofa all day and be petted and waited upon. I was perfectly happy from morning to night; I devoted myself to his amus.e.m.e.nt; reading to him, talking to him, or even sitting silently beside him while he slept.

"'Our Crystal is getting quite a woman,' he said once, when I turned his hot pillow and put the cooling drink beside him; and at that brief word of praise my face flushed with pleasure, and I felt amply rewarded.

"One day we had visitors, Hugh Redmond and two girls, distant relations of his, who were staying at the Hall with their mother.

"One of them, Isabel Vyvie, I had seen several times, and had taken a great dislike to her.

"She was a tall, striking-looking girl, much handsomer than her sister, Emily, and she must have been two or three years older than Raby. She always seemed to like his society; so, while the others talked to Uncle Rolf and Margaret, she sat on my low chair beside Raby's couch, and talked to him without seeming to notice any one else.

"Miss Vyvie was very handsome and a flirt, and Raby was only a young man.

"It would hardly have been natural if he had not seemed gratified by her interest in him, though I did not know until afterward that he valued it at its true cost.

"Still she was pleasant and her little airs amused him, and he entered into a long conversation with some enjoyment, and for once I was forgotten. I tried to join in once or twice, but Miss Vyvie treated me as a child, and scarcely deigned to notice me; but Raby did not seem to resent her indifference or want of courtesy.

"'He only cares for me when others are not by,' I thought, and my heart began to swell with jealous emotion. But just before she left something occurred that fanned the envious spark into a flame.

"Her white hand was resting on the little table that stood beside the couch. There was a diamond ring on one finger that flashed as she moved; presently she stretched it out to Raby, with a bewitching smile.

"'Oh, what lovely lilies of the valley,' she exclaimed, pointing to the flowers; 'they are the first I have seen this year. I adore lilies, they are perfectly exquisite. Do let me have them, Mr.

Ferrers. I know they grew in the garden, and I shall keep them as a memento of Sandycliffe and the dear Grange. Come, you must not let me break the tenth commandment and covet any longer,' and the fair, girlish hand rested near the flowers as she spoke.

"Raby looked embarra.s.sed and hesitated.

"I had gathered those lilies for him before the dew was off them. They grew in a little nook of the Redmond grounds; they were his favorite flowers, and I had walked all those miles to hunt for them.