Captain Jinks, Hero Part 20

"What does the dear old flag stand for?" he repeated. "For liber--No--for-r-r----Well, 'pon my word, what does she stand for?"

"For the army and navy," whispered a neighbor.

"Yes," he thundered. "Yes, the flag stands for the army and navy, for our officers and men, for our men-of-war and artillery, for our cavalry and infantry, that's what she stands for!"

This was received with great applause, and the speaker smiled with satisfaction. Then gradually his expression became sad.

"I am sorry to say," he said,--"I am ashamed as a citizen of our great land to be obliged to admit, that there are at home a few craven-hearted, mean-spirited men--shall I call them men? No, nor even women--there are creatures, I say, who disapprove of our glorious deeds, who spurn the flag and the n.o.ble principles for which it stands and to which I have alluded, who say that we have no business to take away land which belongs to other people, and that we have not the right to slaughter rebels and traitors in our midst. I appeal to the patriotic Cubapinos at this board, if we are not introducing a higher and n.o.bler civilization into these islands."

The native gentlemen bowed a.s.sent.

"Have we not given them a better language than their own? Have we not established our enlightened inst.i.tutions? For instance, let me cite the custom house. We have the collector here with us--and the post-office.

The postmaster is----"

"Sh-sh-s.h.!.+" whispered the prompter again. "He's in jail."

"I mean the a.s.sistant postmaster is also with us. And there are our other inst.i.tutions, the----"

"There's going to be a prize-fight to-night," cried a young lieutenant who had taken too much wine, at the foot of the table. "Dandy Sullivan against Joe Corker."

This interruption was too much for the commissioner, who was quite unable to resume the thread of his remarks for several moments. The guests in the mean time moved uneasily in their seats, for most of them were anxious to be off to see the fight.

"Those who carp against us at home," continued the speaker, trying in vain to find some graceful way of coming to a close, "those who dishonor the flag are the men who pretend to be filled with humanity and to desire the welfare of mankind. They pretend to object to bloodshed. They are mere sentimentalists. They are not practical men.

They do not understand our destiny, nor the Const.i.tution, nor progress, nor civilization, nor glory, nor honor, nor the dear old flag, G.o.d bless her. They are sentimentalists. They have no sense of humor."

Here the audience applauded loudly, altho the speaker had not intended to have them applaud just there. It occurred to him that he might just as well stop at this point, and he sat down, not altogether satisfied, however, with his peroration and vexed to think that he had forgotten Sam altogether. The party broke up without delay, and Sam walked off with Cleary, who had been present, to see the prize-fight.

"The commissioner isn't much of a talker, is he?" said Cleary. "That was a bad break about the postmaster. I hear they've arrested Captain Jones for embezzlement too."

"Good heavens!" cried Sam, "what an outrage!" And he told Cleary of his narrow escape from complicity in the matter, and how the military operations had prevented him from calling on the contractors.

"Civilians don't understand these things," he added. "They oughtn't to send them out here. They don't understand things."

"No. They haven't been brought up on tabasco sauce. What can you expect of them?"

They soon arrived at the Alhambra Theater at which the fight was to take place, and found it in progress. A large crowd was collected, consisting of soldiers and natives in equal proportions. The last round was just finis.h.i.+ng, and Joe Corker was in the act of knocking his opponent out. The audience was shouting with glee and excitement, the cheers being mixed with hisses and cries of "Fake, fake!"

"I know Corker," said Cleary. "Come, I'll introduce you."

They pushed forward through the crowd, and were soon in a room behind the stage, where Corker was being rubbed and washed down by his a.s.sistants. Sam looked at the great man and felt rather small and insignificant. "Here's a kind of civilian who is not inferior to army men," he thought. "Perhaps he is even superior." He would not have said this aloud, but he thought it.

"How de do, Joe?" said Cleary, shaking hands. "That was a great fight.

You knocked him out clean. Here's my friend, Colonel Jinks, the hero of San Diego and the pacifier of the Moritos."

Corker nodded condescendingly.

"We enjoyed the fight very much," said Sam, not altogether at his ease.

"It reminded me of my own experience at East Point."

"It was a good fight," said Corker, "and a d.a.m.ned fair one too. I'd like to punch the heads of those fellers who cried 'fake.' It was as fair as fair could be, and Dandy and me was as evenly matched as two peas. I always believe in takin' a feller of your size, and I did."

"That wasn't the way at East Point," said Cleary. "They didn't take fellows of their size there."

"That's against our rules anyway," said Corker.

"It must be a civilian rule," said Sam, beginning to feel his superiority again. "The military rule as we were taught it at East Point was to take a smaller man if you could, and you see, the army does just the same thing. We tackled Castalia and then the Cubapines, and they weren't of our size. We don't fight the powerful countries."

"That's queer," said Corker, drinking a lemonade.

"It's perfectly right," said Sam. "When a man's in the right, and of course we always are, if he fights a man of his size or one bigger than he is, he gives the wrong a chance of winning, and that is clearly immoral. If he takes a weaker man he makes the truth sure of success.

And it's just the same way with nations."

Corker did not seem to be much interested by this disquisition, and Cleary dragged his friend away after they had respectfully bade the pugilist good-night. A crowd of soldiers was waiting outside to see Corker get into his carriage. They paid no attention whatever to Sam and Cleary.

"When it comes to real glory a prize-fighter beats a colonel all hollow," said Cleary, and they parted for the night.

Sam was retained on the general staff and a.s.signed to the important post of censor of the press. His duties were most engrossing, for not only were the proofs of all the local newspapers submitted to him, but also all other printed matter. One day a large number of handbills were confiscated at a printer's and brought in for his inspection. He was very busy and asked his native private secretary to look them over for him. In a half-hour he came to him with a translation of the doc.u.ment.

"What does it say?" cried Sam. "I have no time to read it through."

"It says that governments are made to preserve liberty, and that they get their only authority from the free will of the people who are ruled by them," answered the clerk.

"That's clearly seditious," said Sam. "There must be some plot at the bottom of it. Have the whole edition burned and have the printer locked up."

A few days later a newspaper was brought to him announcing that the Moritos had ma.s.sacred the garrison stationed among them, that the whole province of San Diego was in revolt, and that the regiment there would probably have to fall back on Havilla. Sam was much scandalized, and sent at once for the native editor.

"What does this mean?" said he.

"Pardon, my colonel," said the little man apologetically, "this is a newspaper and this is news. I am sure it is true."

"That is the civilian conception of news," said Sam, with disdain.

"Officially this is not true. We have instructions, as you have often been told, not to allow anything to be printed that can injure the Administration at Whoppington. Any one can see how this would injure it, and news that can injure it is, from the military point of view, untrue. General Notice is making a tour of the country at home, receiving ovations everywhere on account of the complete subjugation of the islands. What effect will such news have upon his reception? Is it a proper way to treat a general who has deserved well of his country?"

"But," interposed the editor, "don't the people know that you are continually sending out more troops?"

"The people do not mind a little thing like that," said Sam. "When an officer and a gentleman says the war is over, they believe it, and they show their grat.i.tude by voting money to send new regiments. Your action in printing this stuff is most disloyal. I will send one of my a.s.sistants around to your office with you to see that this edition is destroyed, and if you repeat the offense you will be deported."

The unfortunate man retired, shrugging his shoulders. As he went out Cleary came running in with a copy of the paper.

"Oh! you've got a copy of that, have you?" said Sam. "It's an outrage to print such things, isn't it?"

"I'm afraid it's true," said Cleary.

"What difference does that make?" exclaimed Sam. "It's the business of an army to conquer a country. We've done it twice, and we can do it as often as we like again."

"Hear, hear!" cried Cleary. "You're becoming more and more of a soldier as you get promoted. You have the true military instinct, I see. Of course it makes no difference who holds the country, but I'm a little disappointed in the Moritos. As for San Diego, Colonel Booth of your old regiment is in command, and I half think he didn't back up the Morito garrison out of jealousy toward you. He wanted to have the Morito country go back, so as to belittle our exploit. But we'll get even with him. I've seen the cable-censor, and not a word about it will go home. I have just sent a despatch saying that the whole island is entirely in our hands and that the natives are swearing allegiance by thousands."

"That's right," said Sam. "It's really a kindness to the people at home, for if they think it's true it makes them just as happy as if it were true, and I think it's positively cruel to worry them unnecessarily."

"To be sure," said Cleary. "And if it does get out, we'll throw all the blame on the Secretary of War and his embalmed beef. They say he's writing a book to show that a diet of mummies is the best for fighting men--and so the quarrels go on. By the way, I just stopped a piece of news that might have interested you. Do you know that you have suppressed the Declaration of Independence?"