The Shadow of the East Part 10
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The house and the family--they were bound up inseparably.
For hundreds of years, in an unbroken line, from father to son ...
from father to son.... Miss Craven sat bolt upright to the sound of an unmistakable sob. She looked with amazement at two tears blistering the page of the open book on her knee. She had not knowingly cried since childhood. It was a good thing that she was alone she thought, with a startled glance round the empty room. She would have to keep a firmer hold over herself than that. She laughed a little shakily, choked, blew her nose vigorously, and walked to the middle window. Outside was stark November. The wind swept round the house in fierce gusts before which the big bare-branched trees in the park swayed and bowed, and trains of late fallen leaves caught in a whirlwind eddied skyward to scatter widely down again.
Rain lashed the window panes. Yet even when storm-tossed the scene had its own peculiar charm. At all seasons it was lovely.
Miss Craven looked at the ma.s.sive trees, beautiful in their clean nakedness, and wondered how often she would see them bud again.
Frowning, she smothered a rising sigh and pressing closer to the window peered out more attentively. Eastward and westward stretched long avenues that curved and receded soon from sight. The gravelled s.p.a.ce before the house was wide; from it two shorter avenues encircling a large oval paddock led to the stables, built at some distance facing the house, but hidden by a belt of firs.
For some time Miss Craven watched, but only a game-keeper pa.s.sed, a drenched setter at his heels, and with a little s.h.i.+ver she turned back to the room. She moved about restlessly, lifting books to lay them down immediately, ransacking the cabinets for prints that at a second glance failed to interest, and examining the bronzes that she had known from childhood with lengthy intentness as if she saw them now for the first time.
A footman came and silently replenished the fire. Her thoughts, interrupted, swung into a new channel. She sat down at the writing table and drawing toward her a sheet of paper slowly wrote the date. Beyond that she did not get. The ink dried on the pen as she stared at the blank sheet, unable to express as she wished the letter she had intended to write.
She laid the silver holder down at last with a hopeless gesture and her eyes turned to a bronze figure that served as a paper weight. It was a piece of her own work and she handled it lovingly with a curiously sad smile until a second hard sob broke from her and pus.h.i.+ng it away she covered her face with her hands.
"Not for myself, G.o.d knows it's not for myself," she whispered, as if in extenuation. And mastering herself with an effort she made a second attempt to write but at the end of half a dozen words rose impatiently, crumpled the paper in her hand and walking to the fireplace threw it among the blazing logs.
She watched it curl and discolour, the writing blackly distinct, and crumble into ashes. Then from force of habit she searched for a cigarette in a box on the mantelpiece, but as she lit it a sudden thought arrested her and after a moment's hesitation the cigarette followed the half--written letter into the fire.
With an impatient shrug she went back to an arm chair and again tried to read, but though her eyes mechanically followed the words on the printed page she did not notice what she was reading and laying the book down she gave up all further endeavour to distract her wandering thoughts.
They were not pleasant and when, a little later, the door opened she turned her head expectantly with a sigh of relief. Peters came in briskly.
"I've come to inquire," he said laughing, "the family pew held me in solitary state this morning. Time was when I never minded, but this last year has spoiled me. I was booked for lunch but I came as soon as I could. n.o.body ill, I hope?"
Miss Craven looked at him for a moment before answering as he stood with his back to the fire, his hands clasped behind him, his face ruddy with the wind and rain, his keen blue eyes on hers, reliable, unchanging.
It was a curious chance that had brought him--just at that moment. The temptation to make an unusual confidence rose strongly. She had known him and trusted him for more years than she cared to remember. How much to say? Indecision held her.
"You are always thoughtful, Peter," she temporised. "I am afraid there is no excuse," with a little smile; "Barry rode off somewhere quite early this morning and Gillian went yesterday to the Horringfords.
I expect her back to-day in time for tea. For myself, I had gout or rheumatism or the black dog on my back, I forget which! Anyhow, I stayed at home." She laughed and pointed to the cigarettes. He took one, tapping it on his thumbnail.
"You were alone. Why didn't you 'phone? I should have been glad to escape the Australians. They are enormously kind, but somewhat--er--overwhelming," he added with a quick laugh.
"My dear man, be thankful I never thought of it. I've been like a bear with a sore head all day." She looked past him into the fire, and struck by a new note in her voice he refrained from comment, smoking slowly and luxuriating in the warmth after a cold wet drive in an open motor. He never used a closed car. But some words she had used struck him. "Barry is riding--?" with a glance at the storm raging outside.
"Yes. He had breakfast at an unearthly hour and went off early. Weather seems to make no difference to him, but he will be soaked to the skin."
"He's tough," replied Peters shortly. "I thought he must be out. As I came in just now Yos.h.i.+o was hanging about the hall, watching the drive.
Waiting for him, I suppose," he added, flicking a curl of ash into the fire. "He's a treasure of a valet," he supplemented conversationally.
But Miss Craven let the observation pa.s.s. She was still staring into the leaping flames, drumming with her fingers on the arms of the chair.
Once she tried to speak but no words came. Peters waited. He felt unaccountably but definitely that she wished him to wait, that what was evidently on her mind would come with no prompting from him. He felt in her att.i.tude a tension that was unusual--to-day she was totally unlike herself. Once or twice only in the course of a lifelong friends.h.i.+p she had shown him her serious side. She had turned to him for help then--he seemed presciently aware that she was turning to him for help now.
He prided himself that he knew her as well as she knew herself and he understood the effort it would cost her to speak. That he guessed the cause of her trouble was no short cut to getting that trouble uttered.
She would take her own time, he could not go half-way to meet her. He must stand by and wait. When had he ever done anything else at Craven Towers? His eyes glistened curiously in the firelight, and he rammed his hands down into his jacket pockets with abrupt jerkiness. Suddenly Miss Craven broke the silence.
"Peter--I'm horribly worried about Barry," the words came with a rush.
He understood her too well to cavil.
"Dear lady, so am I," he replied with a promptness that did not console.
"Peter, what is it?" she went on breathlessly. "Barry is utterly changed. You see it as well as I. I don't understand--I'm all at sea--I want your help. I couldn't discuss him with anybody else, but you--you are one of us, you've always been one of us. Fair weather or foul, you've stood by us. What we should have done without you G.o.d only knows.
You care for Barry, he's as dear to you as he is to me, can't you do something? The suffering in his face--the tragedy in his eyes--I wake up in the night seeing them! Peter, can't you _do_ something?" She was beside him, clutching at the mantel-shelf, shaking with emotion. The sight of her unnerved, almost incoherent, shocked him. He realised the depth of the impression that had been made upon her--deep indeed to produce such a result. But what she asked was impossible. He made a little negative gesture and shook his head.
"Dear lady, I can't do anything. And I wonder whether you know how it hurts to have to say so? No son could be dearer to me than Barry--for the sake of his mother--" his voice faltered momentarily, "but the fact remains--he is not my son. I am only his agent. There are certain things I cannot do and say, no matter how great the wish," he added with a twisted smile.
Miss Craven seemed scarcely to be listening. "It happened in j.a.pan," she a.s.serted in fierce low tones. "j.a.pan! j.a.pan!" she continued vehemently, "how much more sorrow is that country to bring to our family! It happened in j.a.pan and whatever it was--Yos.h.i.+o knows! You spoke of him just now. You said he was hanging about--waiting--watching. Peter, he's doing it all the time! He watches continually. Barry never has to send for him--he's always there, waiting to be called. When Barry goes out the man is restless until he comes in again--haunting the hall--it gets on my nerves. Yet there is nothing I can actually complain of. He doesn't intrude, he is as noiseless as a cat and vanishes if he sees you, but you know that just out of sight he's still there--waiting--listening. Peter, what is he waiting for? I don't think that it is apparent to the rest of the household, I didn't notice it myself at first. But a few months ago something happened and since then I don't seem able to get away from it. It was in the night, about two o'clock; I was wakeful and couldn't sleep. I thought if I read I might read myself sleepy. I hadn't a book in my room that pleased me and I remembered a half-finished novel I had left in the library. I didn't take a light--I know every turn in the Towers blindfold. As you know, to reach the staircase from my room I have to pa.s.s Barry's door, and at Barry's door I fell over something in the darkness--something with hands of steel that saved me from an awkward tumble and hurried me down the pa.s.sage and into the moonlit gallery before I could find a word of expostulation. Yos.h.i.+o of course. I was naturally startled and angry in consequence. I demanded an explanation and after a great deal of hesitation he muttered something about Barry wanting him--which is ridiculous on the face of it. If Barry had really wanted him he would have been inside the room, not crouched outside on the door mat. He seemed very upset and kept begging me to say nothing about it. I don't remember how he put it but he certainly conveyed the impression that it would not be good for Barry to know. I don't understand it--Barry trusts him implicitly--and yet this.... I'm afraid, and I've never been afraid in my life before." The little break in her voice hurt him. He felt curiously unable to cope with the situation. Her story disturbed him more than he cared to let her see in her present condition of unwonted agitation. Twice in the past they had stood shoulder to shoulder through a crisis of sufficient magnitude and she had showed then a cautious judgment, a reliability of purpose that had been purely masculine in its strength and sanity. She had been wholly matter-of-fact and unimaginative, unswayed by petty trivialities and broad in her decision.
She had displayed a levelness of mind which had almost excluded feeling and which had enabled him to deal with her as with another man, confident of her understanding and the unlikelihood of her succ.u.mbing unexpectedly to ordinary womanly weaknesses. He had thought that he knew her thoroughly, that no circ.u.mstance that might arise could alter characteristics so set and inherent. But to-day her present emotion which had come perilously near hysteria, showed her in a new light that made her almost a stranger. He was a little bewildered with the discovery. It was incredible after all these years, just as if an edifice that he had thought strongly built of stone had tumbled about his ears like a pack of cards. He could hardly grasp it. He felt that there was something behind it all--something more than she admitted.
He was tempted to ask definitely but second reflection brought the conviction that it would be a mistake, that it would be taking an unfair advantage. Sufficient unto the day--his present concern was to help her regain a normal mental poise. And to do that he must ignore half of what her suggestions seemed to imply. He felt her breakdown acutely, he must say nothing that would add to her distress of mind. It was better to appear obtuse than to concur too heartily in fears, a recollection of which in a saner moment he knew would be distasteful to her. She would never forgive herself--the less she had to forget the better. She trusted him or she would never have spoken at all. That he knew and he was honoured by her confidence. They had always been friends, but in her weakness he felt nearer to her than ever before. She was waiting for him to speak. He chose the line that seemed the least open to argument.
He spoke at last, evenly, unwilling alike to seem incredulous or overanxious, his big steady hand closing warmly over her twitching fingers.
"I don't think there is any cause--any reason to doubt Yos.h.i.+o's fidelity. The man is devoted to Barry. His behaviour certainly sounds--curious, but can be attributed I am convinced to over-zealousness. He is an alien in a strange land, cut off from his own natural distractions and amus.e.m.e.nts, and with time on his hands his devotion to his master takes a more noticeable form than is usual with an ordinary English man-servant. That he designs any harm I cannot believe. He has been with Barry a long time--on the several occasions when he stayed with him at your house in London did you notice anything in his behaviour then similar to the att.i.tude you have observed recently? No? Then I take it that it is due to the same anxiety that we ourselves have felt since Barry's return. Only in Yos.h.i.+o's case it is probably based on definite knowledge, whereas ours is pure conjecture.
Barry has undoubtedly been up against something--momentous. Between ourselves we can admit the fact frankly. It is a different man who has come back to us--and we can only carry on and notice nothing. He is trying to forget something. He has worked like a n.i.g.g.e.r since he came home, slogging away down at the estate office as if he had his bread to earn. He does the work of two men--and he hates it. I see him sometimes, forgetful of his surroundings, staring out of the window, and the look on his face brings a confounded lump into my throat. Thank G.o.d he's young--perhaps in time--" he shrugged and broke off inconclusively, conscious of the futility of plat.i.tudes. And they were all he had to offer. There was no suggestion he could make, nothing he could do. It was repet.i.tion of history, again he had to stand by and watch suffering he was powerless to aid, powerless to relieve. The mother first and now the son--it would seem almost as if he had failed both. The sense of helplessness was bitter and his face was drawn with pain as he stared dumbly at the window against which the storm was beating with renewed violence. The sight of the angry elements brought almost a feeling of relief; it would be something that he could contend with and overcome, something that would go towards mitigating the galling sense of impotence that chafed him. He felt the room suddenly stifling, he wanted the cold sting of the rain against his face, the roar of the wind in the trees above his head. Abruptly he b.u.t.toned his jacket in preparation for departure. Miss Craven pulled herself together. She laid a detaining hand on his arm. "Peter," she said slowly, "do you think that Barry's trouble has any connection with--my brother? The change of pictures in the dining-room--it was so strange. He said it was a reparation. Do you think Barry--found out something in j.a.pan?"
Peter shook his head. "G.o.d knows," he said gruffly. For a moment there was silence, then with a sigh Miss Craven moved towards a bell.
"You'll stay for tea?"
"Thanks, no. I've got a man coming over, I'll have to go. Give my love to Gillian and tell her I shall not, forgive her soon for deserting me this morning. Has she lost that nasty cough yet?"
"Almost. I didn't want her to go to the Horringfords, but she promised to be careful." Miss Craven paused, then:
"What did we do without Gillian, Peter?" she said with an odd little laugh.
"'You've got me guessing,' as Atherton says. She's a witch, bless her!"
he replied, holding out his hands. Miss Craven took them and held them for a moment.
"You're the best pal I ever had, Peter," she said unsteadily, "and you've given all your life to us Cravens."
The sudden gripping of his hands was painful, then he bent his head and unexpectedly put his lips to the fingers he held so closely.
"I'm always here--when you want me," he said huskily, and was gone.
Miss Craven stood still looking after him with a curious smile.
"Thank G.o.d for Peter," she said fervently, and went back to her station by the window. It was considerably darker than before, but for some distance the double avenue leading to the stables was visible. As she watched, playing absently with the blind-cord, her mind dwelt on the long connection between Peter Peters and her family. Thirty years--the best of his life. And in exchange sorrow and an undying memory. The woman he loved had chosen not him but handsome inconsequent Barry Craven and, for her choice, had reaped misery and loneliness. And because he had known that inevitably a day would come when she would need a.s.sistance and support he had sunk his own feelings and retained his post. Her brief happiness had been hard to watch--the subsequent long years of her desertion a protracted torture. He had raged at his own helplessness. And ignorant of his love and the motive that kept him at Craven Towers she had come to lean on him and refer all to him. But for his care the Craven properties would have been ruined, and the Craven interests neglected beyond repair.
For some time before her sister-in-law's death Miss Craven had known, as only a woman can know, but now for the first time she had heard from his lips a half-confession of the love that he had guarded jealously for thirty years.
The unusual tears that to-day seemed so curiously near the surface rose despite her and she blinked the moisture from her eyes with a feeling of irritated shame.
Then a figure, almost indistinguishable in the gloom, coming from the stables, caught her eye and she gave a sharp sigh of relief.
He was walking slowly, his hands deep in his pockets, his shoulders hunched against the storm of wind and rain that beat on his broad back.
His movements suggested intense weariness, yet nearing the house his step lagged even more as if, despite physical fatigue and the inclement weather, he was rather forcing himself to return than showing a natural desire for shelter.
There was in his tread a heaviness that contrasted forcibly with the elasticity that had formerly been characteristic. As he pa.s.sed close by the window where Miss Craven was standing she saw that he was splashed from head to foot. She thought with sudden compa.s.sion of the horse that he had ridden. She had been in the stables only a few weeks before when he had handed over another jaded mud-caked brute trembling in every limb and showing signs of merciless riding to the old head groom who had maintained a stony silence as was his duty but whose grim face was eloquent of all he might not say. It was so unlike Barry to be inconsiderate, toward animals he had been always peculiarly tender-hearted.
She hurried out to the hall, almost cannoning with a little dark-clad figure who gave way with a deep Oriental reverence. "Master very wet,"
he murmured, and vanished.
The Shadow of the East Part 10
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The Shadow of the East Part 10 summary
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