New Homes for Old Part 10

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650, 651.

[35] _United States Immigration Commission Reports_, vol. vi, pp.

544-545, on the subject of "Housing by Employers." See Wood, _The Housing of the Unskilled Wage Earner_, p. 114 ff.

[36] United States Bureau of Labor Statistics _Monthly Labor Review_, May, 1917, p. 147, and June, 1919, p. 101.

[37] Lusk, _The Science of Nutrition_ (Third Edition), pp. 562, 570.

[38] United States Bureau of Labor Statistics _Monthly Labor Review_, vol. ix (July, 1919), p. 4. The a.n.a.logy is drawn between the sale of food by calorie and the sale of coal by the British thermal unit.

[39] See Thomas, _s.e.x and Society_, chap. vii; Veblen, _Theory of the Leisure Cla.s.s_, chap. vii; Anthony, _Feminism in Germany and Scandinavia_, chaps. v and vi, "Dress Reform."

[40] _The Chicago Standard Budget for Dependent Families_, p. 18.

[41] _Ibid._, p. 14.

[42] New York daily papers, September 18, 19, 20, 1919. Reports of International Conference of Women Physicians under Auspices of Young Women's Christian a.s.sociation.

[43] See, for example, King, _Lower Living Costs in Cities_.

VI

THE CARE OF THE CHILDREN

The care of the children is the most important of the mother's duties.

It cannot be thoroughly done under modern conditions unless the mother has leisure to inform herself about conditions surrounding her children at work and at play, and to keep in touch with their interests, especially as they grow older. It includes caring for their physical wants, bathing them and keeping them clean when they are little, feeding them, providing their clothing, taking care of them when they are sick; it also includes looking after their education and training, choosing the school, seeing that they get to school regularly and on time, following their work at school as it is reported on the monthly report cards, encouraging them to greater efforts when their work is unsatisfactory, praising them when they do well, and, above all, giving them the home training and discipline that they need. It is the mother who can teach the children good habits, forming, as only the home life can form, their standards of right and wrong; it means watching them at their play or seeing that they play in a place that is safe without watching.

As they grow older it means a general supervision of their recreation and their companions, judging surrounding influences, having in mind the dangers that lie in the way of the unwary maiden and the perils of the impetuous boy. Times have changed since she was young, and amid a great variety of choice she must decide for her children which are harmless influences and diversions. In the case of the older girls it means the serious problems of clothes, of amus.e.m.e.nts, of earnings, of prospective mating.

The mother shares many of these tasks with the father. Responsibility for discipline, decisions, and training must be joint, but the actual carrying out of these duties is the mother's. Usually the older children help with the care of the younger, but the final responsibility rests upon the mother.

[Ill.u.s.tration: A SLOVAK MOTHER, NEWLY ARRIVED]

UNPREPAREDNESS OF THE IMMIGRANT MOTHER

Looking after the physical well-being of the children is primarily a matter of maintaining them in health, and hence the discussion of these problems is left to the division of this study devoted to that subject. It is sufficient here to note that it is a peculiarly difficult problem for the foreign-born mothers. Modern knowledge of child feeding and modern ideas with regard to daily bathing are of recent origin. In many of the countries from which these women come they are unknown. A Croatian lawyer, who translated some of the Children's Bureau publications, was very much interested in the one on the care of the child of pre-school age. He told the investigator that there was nothing like that in his country, and he hoped that this translation might be used to reach the women in Croatia.

If this is true in matters that pertain to the physical welfare of children, it is even more marked in matters affecting their education and training. The modern idea is that the child should not be trained and disciplined to be subservient to the parent, but should be helped to develop his own personality. It is based on a greater respect for the intelligence of the child and on the idea that the early placing of the responsibility for his acts on the child himself will better train citizens for a changing world, and especially for democracy.

These ideas are of comparatively recent formulation, many of them dating from the impetus given to the study of the child by modern psychology. Although of gradual growth, they have been for a long time implicit in the current practices of the most enlightened section of the community. They are understood by a relatively small part of the community. They are acted on by much larger groups, so that it is common to hear members of the generation that is pa.s.sing lament the lack of discipline of the children to-day.

The situation is complicated by the fact that many people who talk the most about developing the child's personality stop in practice with the removal of restraints, without attempting the more difficult task of developing his sense of responsibility. The point to note is that the native born, in part through their own conscious choice and in part blindly moved by forces they do not understand, have been gradually moving away from the old tradition of strict and unquestioning obedience such as is exacted by military authorities.

With the immigrant parents the situation is very different. The countries from which they come are not republics, and hence the opportunities for training for intelligent citizens.h.i.+p have been lacking, especially in the lower economic groups. The idea of the government has often been rather to foster that training that makes for good soldiers. Moreover, the civilizations from which most of these people came were at the time static, so that the evils of blind obedience and rigid conformity were not present to the same extent as in our more rapidly moving civilization. Thus the tradition of absolute obedience of child to parent remained practically intact.

Wherever this tradition existed the usual method of enforcement was corporal punishment, generally inflicted with a strap. It is not intended to a.s.sert that a great deal of child beating was prevalent in the old country; in most cases the child learned quickly that the penalty of disobedience was the strap, and threats became as effective as its actual use.

BREAKDOWN OF PARENTAL AUTHORITY

The immigrant brings with him to this country this tradition of the authority of the parent, with no thought of doing anything but maintaining it here. There are, however, forces at work in this country that tend to make this impossible. There are suggestions of a different tradition in the general atmosphere. Many immigrants absorb these suggestions unconsciously, as they absorb those of a wider freedom for women. More important, however, is the development of the child. Circ.u.mstances of his daily life force him to take the lead in many situations. This has been pointed out in a study of the delinquent child, where it is said:[44]

Obviously, many things which are familiar to the child in the facts of daily intercourse in the street, or in the school, will remain unknown or unintelligible to the father and mother. It has become a commonplace that this cheap wisdom on the part of the boy or girl leads to a reversal of the usual relations.h.i.+p between parent and child. The child who knows English is the interpreter who makes the necessary explanations for the mother to the landlord, the grocer, the sanitary inspector, the charity visitor, and the teacher or truant officer. It is the child again who often interviews the "boss," finds the father a job, and sees him through the onerous task of "joining the union." The father and mother grow accustomed to trusting the child's version of what "they all do in America," and gradually find themselves at a great disadvantage in trying to maintain parental control.

In the face of this situation the conduct of the immigrant parent generally follows along one of three very distinct lines: (a) he modifies his methods in family discipline little by little, himself unconscious of the implications, or (b) he stubbornly attempts to retain the old authority undiminished, or (c) he abandons the old system without having anything to put in its place. The first method of behavior is probably the most common; it usually leads to little difficulty within the family group if the parents' modifications are made as fast as the child becomes aware of the newer ideas. The attempt to maintain the old system in its entirety may also be accomplished without disturbance if the child is willing, and probably in most cases it is maintained without serious opposition on the part of the child.

Abandoning the old system without subst.i.tuting something better is probably the least frequent reaction to the situation, but it is one that is especially dangerous in immigrant groups. The native-born parent who relaxes all discipline has this advantage over the foreign born; in general he can at will demonstrate his superior knowledge, and the child looks up to him and takes his advice, while the foreign-born parent is peculiarly helpless because the child thinks that his own knowledge, demonstrably superior in some things, extends to all fields.

The relative frequency of these different modes of reaction would be a difficult matter to determine. They were all evident from the facts about discipline obtained from the families visited in this study. To some extent the maintenance of the old system intact may be judged by the prevalence of corporal punishment as a method of enforcing obedience.

A doctor of a Lithuanian district said that one thing he was very anxious to see disappear was the strap, which could now be seen in almost every home. Fifty-four of the eighty-seven families from whom information was obtained said that they used whipping as a method of punishment. In most of the cases there was nothing to indicate with what the child was whipped, but in five it was definitely stated that a strap was used. In very few cases was there any attempt to punish the child in private. It was usually stated that the whipping was done before all the other members of the family. Two or three families stated that they did not whip the children on the street.

A significant fact was the frequently repeated a.s.sertion that the children were whipped because they were too young to understand anything else. An interesting state of transition was seen in some of the thirty-three families who had abandoned whipping but had not given up the idea of absolute obedience. It is evidenced in comments like the following: "They are not whipped. Father threatens with a strap."

Or, "It [whipping] is not necessary. Father speaks, and children obey." Some families had relaxed the discipline sufficiently to be apparent to our investigators, who made such comments as "Children are making a terrible noise, but n.o.body seemed to mind."

It has already been said that whatever the reaction, the training of the children usually takes place without visible disaster to the family group. This is especially true while the children are young. As they grow older the dangers that are inherent in such a situation become more marked. The figures on juvenile delinquency show that an unduly large proportion of juvenile offenders are children of foreign-born parents. This subject will be discussed more fully at a later point in the chapter in connection with the problem of the older boy and girl. It is important to emphasize here that the foundation for later trouble is often laid while the children are young, and hence consideration of the effect of modern ideas on discipline and training should begin with the very young child.

LEARNING TO PLAY

One of the needs of the growing child that is much emphasized in modern ideas of child culture is an opportunity for wholesome play.

The foreign-born mother, from a rural district in Europe, where children were put to work helping the parents as soon as they could be in any way useful, frequently does not recognize this need, and hence does not even do those things within her power to secure it. From some opportunities which she and the children might enjoy together, she is cut off by lack of knowledge of English. A Bohemian woman, for example, said that she did not go with her husband and the children to the moving pictures, as she could not read the English explanations and often did not understand the pictures.

Even when the need is recognized it is still a very difficult problem.

In the old country, when the child was too little to work, he could play in the fields quite safe, in sight of his mother at her work. In the city, however, especially in the congested districts, which are the only ones known to immigrants when they first come, the child cannot play in his own yard, for there is nothing that can be called a yard. The alternatives are the city streets with their manifold dangers, or the public playground. From the point of view of physical safety as well as in giving a place for more wholesome play, the public playground is obviously the more desirable.

The provision of playgrounds, however, is everywhere inadequate, in some places much more so than in others. In Chicago, which is probably better equipped in this respect than most cities, there are large districts that have no easy access to a playground. Many of the women that were asked where their children played said that they played on the streets, not because the parents thought it safe, but because they could not go to a playground alone and the mother had not time to take them. It was interesting, too, to learn that some of the parents who preferred the playground, and whose children played there, did not think the children should be left there alone. In one Bohemian family the grandmother took the two little boys to the playground and stayed with them as long as they stayed.

In part, then, the problem of play s.p.a.ce is a problem in housing reform. All the newer housing projects make provision for a s.p.a.ce for this purpose, either by the individual yard or where the multiple house is used, by one playground for every three or four families.

Housing reform, however, comes slowly and immediate relief could be given by the provision of many more public playgrounds. It is obvious that these must be so directed and supervised that children can be left with perfect safety.

It would also be necessary to see that the foreign-speaking mothers were informed of the advantages of the playground and convinced of its safety for their children. The supervision of children's play in streets and vacant lots could be greatly extended. The establis.h.i.+ng during certain hours of "play zones," from which traffic is excluded and in which the younger children and their mothers could be taught simple games and dances, has been found successful.

PARENTS AND EDUCATION

In the matter of education the state has relieved the parent of a large part of the responsibility by legislation prescribing the ages during which the child must attend school, and in some states the grade he must reach before leaving school. In spite of this there still rests with the parent the responsibility of choosing the school, getting the child to school promptly and regularly, following his progress, deciding whether he shall go beyond the time prescribed by law.

The choice of the schools means for most immigrant groups, a choice between the public and the parochial school. In very large numbers of cases the parochial school is chosen. The reason for this is only in part the influence of the church, although this undoubtedly counts for a great deal. The people we have interviewed in this study have repeatedly pointed out that it is not only for religious education and training that the foreign-born parent sends his child to the parochial school, but that it is also because he wants him to learn the language of his parents, the history and traditions of the country from which he came, and to retain a respect for the experiences and a.s.sociations that remain of great importance to the parents.

Another reason that has often been given for sending the children to the parochial school is the lack of discipline in the public schools.

This has been especially emphasized by Italians, but it has also been spoken of by members of other groups. There can be no question that the parochial school, under the tradition of authority maintained by the church, is much nearer in its idea of discipline to the ideas the immigrant brings with him from the old country, than is the public school whose system of training the immigrant parent does not understand and has not had made clear to him.

[Ill.u.s.tration: IMMIGRANT CHILDREN ACQUIRING INDIVIDUAL INITIATIVE IN A MONTESSORI CLa.s.s AT HULL HOUSE]

New Homes for Old Part 10

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