The Merry Wives of Windsor Part 22

How now, Sir Hugh! no school to-day?

_Evans._ No; Master Slender is let the boys leave to 10 play.

_Quick._ Blessing of his heart!

_Mrs Page._ Sir Hugh, my husband says my son profits nothing in the world at his book. I pray you, ask him some questions in his accidence. 15

_Evans._ Come hither, William; hold up your head; come.

_Mrs Page._ Come on, sirrah; hold up your head; answer your master, be not afraid.

_Evans._ William, how many numbers is in nouns?

_Will._ Two. 20

_Quick._ Truly, I thought there had been one number more, because they say, 'Od's nouns.'

_Evans._ Peace your tattlings! What is 'fair,' William?

_Will._ Pulcher.

_Quick._ Polecats! there are fairer things than polecats, 25 sure.

_Evans._ You are a very simplicity 'oman: I pray you, peace. --What is 'lapis,' William?

_Will._ A stone.

_Evans._ And what is 'a stone,' William? 30

_Will._ A pebble.

_Evans._ No, it is 'lapis:' I pray you, remember in your prain.

_Will._ Lapis.

_Evans._ That is a good William. What is he, William, 35 that does lend articles?

_Will._ Articles are borrowed of the p.r.o.noun, and be thus declined, Singulariter, nominativo, hic, haec, hoc.

_Evans._ Nominativo, hig, hag, hog; pray you, mark: genitivo, hujus. Well, what is your accusative case? 40

_Will._ Accusativo, hinc.

_Evans._ I pray you, have your remembrance, child; accusativo, hung, hang, hog.

_Quick._ 'Hang-hog' is Latin for bacon, I warrant you.

_Evans._ Leave your prabbles, 'oman. --What is the focative 45 case, William?

_Will._ O,--vocativo, O.

_Evans._ Remember, William; focative is caret.

_Quick._ And that's a good root.

_Evans._ 'Oman, forbear. 50

_Mrs Page._ Peace!

_Evans._ What is your genitive case plural, William?

_Will._ Genitive case!

_Evans._ Ay.

_Will._ Genitive,--horum, harum, horum. 55

_Quick._ Vengeance of Jenny's case! fie on her! never name her, child, if she be a wh.o.r.e.

_Evans._ For shame, 'oman.

_Quick._ You do ill to teach the child such words:--he teaches him to hick and to hack, which they'll do fast 60 enough of themselves, and to call 'horum':--fie upon you!

_Evans._ 'Oman, art thou lunaties? hast thou no understandings for thy cases, and the numbers of the genders?

Thou art as foolish Christian creatures as I would desires. 65

_Mrs Page._ Prithee, hold thy peace.

_Evans._ Show me now, William, some declensions of your p.r.o.nouns.

_Will._ Forsooth, I have forgot.

_Evans._ It is qui, quae, quod: if you forget your 70 'quies,' your 'quaes,' and your 'quods,' you must be preeches.

Go your ways, and play; go.

_Mrs Page._ He is a better scholar than I thought he was.

_Evans._ He is a good sprag memory. Farewell, Mistress 75 Page.

_Mrs Page._ Adieu, good Sir Hugh. [_Exit Sir Hugh._]

Get you home, boy. Come, we stay too long. [_Exeunt._

NOTES: IV, 1

[A Street] Capell. Page's House. Pope.

10: _let_] _get_ Collier MS.

25: _polecats_] _powlcat_ Q3.