Torchy As A Pa Part 43

Did look like kind of a jolly bunch, too, down there in the old dining-room--orchestra jabbin' away, couple of real j.a.p girls floatin'

around with cigars and cigarettes, and all kinds of gla.s.ses on the tables. But you should have seen Amby's jaw drop when he grabs the wine list and starts to give an order.

"What the blazes is a grenadine c.o.c.ktail or--or a pineapple punch?" he demands.

"By me," says I. "Why not sample some of it?"

Which he does eager. "Bah!" says he. "Call that a c.o.c.ktail, do they?

Nothing but sweetened water colored up. Here, waiter! Call the chief."

All Ambrose could get out of the head waiter, though, was shoulder shrugs and regrets. Nothing doing in the real red liquor line. "The champagne cider iss ver' fine, sir," he adds.

"Huh!" says Ambrose. "Ought to be at four fifty a quart. Well, we'll take a chance."

Served it in a silver bucket, too. It had the familiar pop, and the bubbles showed plain in the hollow stemmed gla.s.ses, but you could drink a gallon of it without feelin' inspired to do anything wilder than call for a life preserver.

The roof garden girl-show that we went to afterwards was a zippy performance, after it's kind. Also there was a bar in the lobby. Amby shoved up to that prompt--and came back with two pink lemonades, at 75 cents a throw.

"Well," says I, "ain't there mint on top and a cherry in the bottom?"

"And weak lemonade in between," grumbles Ambrose. "What do they take me for, a gold fish?"

"We'll try a cabaret next," says I.

We did. They had the place fixed up fancy, too, blue and green toy balloons floatin' around the ceilin', a peac.o.c.k in a big gold cage, tables ranged around the dancin' s.p.a.ce, and the trombone artist puttin'

his whole soul into a pumpin' out "The Alcoholic Blues." And you could order most anything off the menu, from a poulet ca.s.serole to a cheese sandwich. Amby and 'Chita splurged on a cafe parfait and a grape juice rickey. Other dissipated couples at nearby tables were indulgin' in canapes of caviar and frosted sarsaparillas. But shortly after midnight the giddy revellers begun to thin out and the girl waiters got yawny.

"How about a round of strawb'ry ice cream sodas; eh, Amby?" I suggests.

"No," says he, "I'm no high school girl. I've put away so much of that sweet slush now that I'll be bilious for a week. But say, Torchy, honest to goodness, is Broadway like this all the time now?"

"No," says I. "They're goin' to have a Y.W.C.A. convention here next week and I expect that'll stir things up quite a bit."

"Sorry," says Amby, "but I shan't be here."

"No?" says I.

"Pos-i-tively," says Ambrose. "'Chita and I will be on our way back by that time; back to good old Buenos Ayres, where there's more doing in a minute than happens the whole length of Broadway in a month. And listen, old son; when we open a bottle something besides the pop will come out of it." "Better hurry," says I. "Maybe p.u.s.s.yfoot Johnson's down there now monkeying with the const.i.tution."

ELEANOR H. PORTER'S NOVELS

JUST DAVID The tale of a loveable boy and the place he comes to fill in the hearts of the gruff farmer folk to whose care he is left.

THE ROAD TO UNDERSTANDING A compelling romance of love and marriage.

OH, MONEY! MONEY!

Stanley Fulton, a wealthy bachelor, to test the dispositions of his relatives, sends them each a check for $100,000, and then as plain John Smith comes among them to watch the result of his experiment.

SIX STAR RANCH A wholesome story of a club of six girls and their summer on Six Star Ranch.

DAWN The story of a blind boy whose courage leads him through the gulf of despair into a final victory gained by dedicating his life to the service of blind soldiers.

ACROSS THE YEARS Short stories of our own kind and of our own people. Contains some of the best writing Mrs. Porter has done.

THE TANGLED THREADS In these stories we find the concentrated charm and tenderness of all her other books.

THE TIE THAT BINDS Intensely human stories told with Mrs. Porter's wonderful talent for warm and vivid character drawing.

Grosset & Dunlap, Publishers, New York

ETHEL M. DELL'S NOVELS

THE LAMP IN THE DESERT The scene of this splendid story is laid in India and tells of the lamp of love that continues to s.h.i.+ne through all sorts of tribulations to final happiness.

GREATHEART The story of a cripple whose deformed body conceals a n.o.ble soul.

THE HUNDREDTH CHANCE A hero who worked to win even when there was only "a hundredth chance."

THE SWINDLER The story of a "bad man's" soul revealed by a woman's faith.

THE TIDAL WAVE Tales of love and of women who learned to know the true from the false.

THE SAFETY CURTAIN A very vivid love story of India. The volume also contains four other long stories of equal interest.

Grosset & Dunlap, Publishers, New York

EDGAR RICE BURROUGH'S NOVELS

TARZAN THE UNTAMED Tells of Tarzan's return to the life of the ape-man in his search for vengeance on those who took from him his wife and home.

JUNGLE TALES OF TARZAN Records the many wonderful exploits by which Tarzan proves his right to ape kings.h.i.+p.

A PRINCESS OF MARS Forty-three million miles from the earth--a succession of the weirdest and most astounding adventures in fiction. John Carter, American, finds himself on the planet Mars, battling for a beautiful woman, with the Green Men of Mars, terrible creatures fifteen feet high, mounted on horses like dragons.

THE G.o.dS OF MARS Continuing John Carter's adventures on the Planet Mars, in which he does battle against the ferocious "plant men," creatures whose mighty tails swished their victims to instant death, and defies Issus, the terrible G.o.ddess of Death, whom all Mars wors.h.i.+ps and reveres.

THE WARLORD OF MARS Old acquaintances, made in the two other stories, reappear, Tars Tarkas, Tardos Mors and others. There is a happy ending to the storv in the union of the Warlord, the t.i.tle conferred upon John Carter, with Drjah Thoris.