Phoebe, Junior Part 12
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"Perhaps it is a very good principle, grandmamma," said Phoebe, "when one is used to it; but the country is colder than town. Where there are fires on every side you must have more warmth than in a detached house like this. But it is only my hands after all. Shall I make the tea?"
"You should wear mittens like me--I always did in the High Street, especial when I was going and coming to the shop, helping serve, when the children were young and I had the time for it. Ah! we've done with all that now. We're more at our ease, but I can't say as we're much happier. A shop is a cheerful sort of thing. I dare say your mother has told you--"
"No," said Phoebe, under her breath; but the reply was not noticed. She nearly dropped the teapot out of her hand when she heard the word--Shop!
Yes, to be sure, that was what being "in trade" meant, but she had never quite realized it till now. Phoebe was going through a tremendous piece of mental discipline in these first days. She writhed secretly, and moaned to herself--why did not mamma tell me? but she sat quite still outside, and smiled as if it was all quite ordinary and natural, and she had heard about the shop all her life. It seemed cruel and unkind to have sent her here without distinct warning of what she was going to meet. But Phoebe was a good girl, and would not blame her father and mother. No doubt they meant it "for the best."
"Is Uncle Tom," she said, faltering somewhat, "in the--shop now?"
"If I'm able," said Mrs. Tozer, "I'll walk that far with you this morning--or Tozer, I mean your grandfather, will go. It's a tidy house o' business, though I say it as shouldn't, seeing it was him and me as made it all; though I don't hold with Mrs. Tom's nonsense about the new windows. Your Uncle Tom is as innocent as innocent, but as for her, she ain't no favourite of mine, and I makes no bones about saying so, I don't mind who hears."
"She ain't so bad as you make her out," said Tozer. "She's kind enough in her way. Your grandmother is a-going to show you off--that's it, my dear. She can't abide Tom's wife, and she wants to show her as you're far finer than her girls. I don't say no. It's nat'ral, and I'm not one as stands against nature; but don't you be prejudiced by my old woman there. She _is_ a prejudiced one. Nothing in the world will make her give up a notion when she's took it into her head."
"No, nothing; and ain't I always right in the end? I should think you've proved that times enough," said the old woman. "Yes, I'll take a little, my dear, since you press me so pretty. Folks take many a thing when they're pressed as they wouldn't touch if there was no one to say, take a bit. Tozer, he never thinks of that; he's always had the best o'
appet.i.tes; but as for me, if I get's a cup o' tea that's all as I cares for. You'll see as she'll take my view, when she's once been to the High Street. She's her mother's daughter, and Phoebe can't abide that woman, no more than me."
"Have they got many children?" said Phoebe. "I know there are two girls, but as I have never seen them--Are they as old as I am?" she asked, with a tremulous feeling at her heart. If there were girls in the shop in the High Street, with whom she would have to be on familiar terms, as her cousins and equals, Phoebe did not feel that she could put up with that.
"The eldest, Polly, is only twelve," said Tozer; "but never you mind, my dear, for you shan't be without company. There's a deal of families with daughters like yourself. Your grandmother won't say nothing against it; and as for me, I think there's nought so cheery as young folks. You shall have a fire in the drawing-room, and as many tea-parties as you like. For the young men, I can't say as there's many, but girls is plenty, and as long as you're content with that--"
Mrs. Tozer regarded him with withering contempt across the table.
"You're clever ones, you men," she said. "Families with daughters! Do you think the Greens and the Robbins is company for _her_? I dare say as you've heard your mother speak of Maria Pigeon, my dear? She married John Green the grocer, and very well to do and respectable they may be, but n.o.body but the likes of your grandfather would think of you and them making friends."
"Indeed I don't care for making friends," said Phoebe, "you must remember that I came not for society, but to wait upon you, dear grandmamma. I don't want young friends. At home I always go out with my mother; let me take walks with you, when you are able. I am glad Uncle Tom's children are little. I don't want company. My work--and the garden--and to sit with grandmamma, that is all I care for. I shall be as happy as the day is long," said this martyr, smiling benignly over the aches in her heart.
Her grandparents looked at her with ever-growing pride. Was not this the ideal young woman, the girl of the story-books, who cared about nothing but her duty?
"That's very nice of you, my dear; but you ain't going to hide yourself up in a corner," said Tozer. And, "Never fear, I'll take her wherever it's fit for her to go to," his wife added, looking at her with pride.
Phoebe felt, in addition to all the rest, that she was to be made a show of to all the connection, as a specimen of what the Tozer blood could come to, and she did not even feel sure that something of the same feeling had not been in her mother's bosom when she fitted her out so perfectly. Phoebe Tozer had left contemporaries and rivals in Carlingford, and the thought of dazzling and surpa.s.sing them in her offspring as in her good fortune had still some sweetness for her mind.
"Mamma meant it too!" Phoebe junior said to herself with a sigh.
Unfortunately for her, she did everybody credit who belonged to her, and she must resign herself to pay the penalty. Perhaps there was some compensation in that thought.
And indeed Phoebe did not wonder at her grandmother's pride when she walked up with her to High Street, supporting her on her arm. She recognised frankly that there were not many people like herself about, few who had so much the air of good society, and not one who was so well dressed. There were excuses to be made then for the anxiety of the old people to produce her in the little world which was everything to them, and with her usual candour and good sense she acknowledged this, though she winced a little when an occasional acquaintance drifted across Mrs.
Tozer's path, and was introduced with pride to "my granddaughter," and thrust forth an ungloved hand, with an exclamation of, "Lord bless us, Phoebe's eldest! I hope I see you well, Miss." Phoebe continued urbane, though it cost her many a pang. She had to keep on a perpetual argument with herself as she went along slowly, holding up her poor grandmother's tottering steps. "If this is what we have really sprung from, this is my own cla.s.s, and I ought to like it; if I don't like it, it must be my fault. I have no right to feel myself better than they are. It is not position that makes any difference, but individual character," Phoebe said to herself. She got as much consolation out of this as is to be extracted from such rueful arguments in general; but it was after all indifferent comfort, and had not her temperament given her a strong hold of herself, and power of subduing her impulses, it is much to be feared that Phoebe would have dropped her grandmother's arm as they approached the station, and run away. She did waver for a moment as she came in sight of it. On that side lay freedom, comfort, the life she had been used to, which was not very elevated indeed, but felt like high rank in comparison with this. And she knew her parents would forgive her and defend her if she went back to them, unable to support the martyrdom which she had rashly taken upon herself. But then how weak that would be, Phoebe thought to herself, drawing Mrs. Tozer's arm more tightly within her own--how small! how it would hurt the feelings of the old people, how it would vex and embarra.s.s her father and mother! Lastly, it might peril her brother's interests and her own, which, to do her justice, was the last thing she thought of, and yet was not undeserving of notice in its way.
"Lean on me more heavily, grandmamma," she said at last, finally concluding and throwing off this self-discussion. She could not prolong it further. It was unworthy of her. Hence-forward she had made up her mind to set her face like a flint, and no longer leave the question of her persistence in her domestic mission an open question. Whatever she might have "to put up with," it was now decided once for all.
"Bless us all, if this ain't grandmamma," said Mrs. Tom. It was not often, as she herself said with pride, that she required to be in the shop, which was very much improved now from its old aspect. Ill luck, however, brought her here to-day. She stood at the door which led from the shop to the house, dividing the counter, talking to a lady who was making a complaint upon the quality of cheese or b.u.t.ter. Mrs. Tozer had led Phoebe that way in order to point out to her the plate-gla.s.s windows and marble slabs for the cheese, of which, though they were one of her grievances against Mrs. Tom, she was secretly proud.
"I don't deny but what they've done a deal," said the old woman, "show and vanity as I call it. I wish they may do as well for themselves with all their plate-gla.s.s as me and Tozer did without it; but it ain't often as you'll see a handsomer shop," she added, contemplating fondly the scene of her early labours. If a squire looks fondly at his land, and a sailor at his s.h.i.+p (when s.h.i.+ps were worth looking at), why should not a shopkeeper regard his shop with the same affectionate feelings? Mrs. Tom Tozer had just taken leave of her remonstrant customer with a curtsey, and an a.s.surance that the faults complained of should be remedied, when she caught sight of the infirm old woman leaning on Phoebe's arm, and made the exclamation already quoted.
"Lord bless us all! if it ain't grandmamma, and Phoebe's daughter along o' her, I'll lay you sixpence," said Mrs. Tom in the extremity of her surprise, and at the highest pitch of her voice. The lady customer was still in the shop, and when she heard this she turned round and gave the new-comers a stare. (It was not very wonderful, Phoebe allowed to herself with secret anguish). She gave old Mrs. Tozer a familiar nod. "This is quite a long walk for you now-a-days," she said, gazing at Phoebe, though she addressed the old woman.
"Thank ye, ma'am, I am a deal better," said Mrs. Tozer, "especially as I've got my granddaughter to take care of me."
"Oh! is this young--person your granddaughter," said the customer with another stare, and then she nodded again and went away wondering.
"Well," Phoebe said to herself, "one little sting more or less what did it matter?" and she went on through the shop supporting her grandmother, keenly sensible of the looks that encountered her on every side. Mrs.
Tom stood leaning against the counter, waiting for them without making any advance. She was smart and good-looking, with a malicious gleam in a pair of bright black beady eyes.
"How are you, granny?" she said, "I declare you're looking quite young again, and as spry as twenty. Come in and rest; and this young lady as is with you, I don't think as I need ask her name, the likeness speaks for itself. It's Phoebe Beecham, ain't it? Bless us all! I'd have known her anywhere, I would; the very moral of her mother, and of you too, granny. As you stand there now, you're as like as two peas."
Unconsciously Phoebe cast a look upon her grandmother. She did not think she was vain. To be unconscious that she had some personal advantages would, of course, be impossible; but a thrill crept through her when she looked at the old woman by her side, wrinkled and red, in her copper-coloured gown. As like as two peas! was that possible? Phoebe's heart sank for the moment to her shoes, and a pitiful look of restrained pain came to her face. This was a.s.sailing her in her tenderest point.
"Am I so like you, grandmamma?" she said, faltering; but added quickly, "then I cannot be like mamma. How do you do? My mother wished me to come at once, to bring her kind regards. Is my uncle at home?"
"No, Miss, your uncle ain't at home," said Mrs. Tom, "but you might be civil, all the same, and put a name to me, more nor if I was a dog. I'm your aunt, I am--and I likes all my t.i.tles, I do--and proper respect."
"Surely," said Phoebe, with a bow and a gracious smile--but she did not add that name. She was pleased to think that "Tom's wife" was her mother's favourite aversion, and that a dignified resistance to her claims was, so to speak, her duty. It even amused her to think of the ingenuity required throughout a long conversation for the clever and polite eluding of this claim.
"I hope as you mean to let us in, Amelia," said Mrs. Tozer, "for it ain't often as I takes so long a walk. I would never have thought of it but for Phoebe--Phoebe junior, as Tozer calls her. She's been used to things very different, but I'm thankful to say she ain't a bit proud.
She couldn't be more attentive to me if I was the queen, and talks of your children as pretty as possible, without no nonsense. It ain't often as you see that in a girl brought up like she's been."
"I don't pretend to know nothing of how she's been brought up," said Mrs. Tom, "and I don't think as there's no occasion for pride here.
We're all well-to-do, and getting on in the world--thanks to Him as gives the increase. I don't see no opening for pride here. Me and your mother were never very good friends, Phoebe, since that's your name; but if there's anything I can do for you, or my family, you won't ask twice.
Grandmother's ain't a very lively house, not like mine, as is full of children. Come in, Granny. I'm always speaking of making the stairs wider, and a big window on the landing; but folks can't do everything at once, and we'll have to do with it a bit longer. We've done a deal already to the old place."
"More than was wanted, or was thought upon in my time," said the old lady, to whom this was as the trumpet of battle. "The stairs did well enough for me, and I can't think what Tom can want changing things as he's been used to all his life."
"Oh, it ain't Tom," said his wife, her face lighting up with satisfaction. "Tom wouldn't mind if the place was to come to bits about our ears. He's like you, granny, he's one of the stand-still ones. It ain't Tom, it's me."
This little pa.s.sage of arms took place as they were going upstairs, which cost poor Mrs. Tozer many pantings and groaning, and placed Phoebe for once on Mrs. Tom's side, for a window on the landing would have been a wonderful improvement, there was no denying. When, at last, they had toiled to the top, fighting their way, not only through the obscurity, but through an atmosphere of ham and cheese which almost choked Phoebe, the old lady was speechless with the exertion, though the air was to her as the air of Paradise. Phoebe placed her on a chair and undid her bonnet-strings, and for a minute was really alarmed. Mrs. Tom, however, took it with perfect equanimity.
"She's blown a bit; she ain't as young as she was, nor even as she thinks for," said that sympathetic person. "Come, Granny, cheer up. Them stairs ain't strange to you. What's the good of making a fuss? Sit down and get your breath," she went on, pulling forward a chair; then turning to Phoebe, she shrugged her shoulders and raised her eyebrows. "She's breaking fast, that's what it is," said Mrs. Tom under her breath, with a nod of her head.
"This is the room as your mother spent most of her life in when she was like you," said Mrs. Tozer, when she regained her breath. "It was here as she met your father first. The first time I set my eyes on him, 'That's the man for my Phoebe,' I said to myself; and sure enough, so it turned out."
"You didn't miss no way of helping it on, neither, granny, if folks do you justice," said Mrs. Tom. "Mothers can do a deal when they exerts themselves; and now Phoebe has a daughter of her own, I dare be sworn she's just as clever, throwing the nice ones and the well-off ones in her way. It's a wonder to me as she hasn't gone off yet, with all her opportunities--two or three and twenty, ain't you, Miss Phoebe? I should have thought you'd have married long afore now."
"I stall be twenty my next birthday," said Phoebe. "My cousins are a great deal younger, I hear; are they at school? I hope I shall see them before I go."
"Oh, you'll see 'em fast enough," said their mother, "they're 'aving their music lesson. I don't hold with sending girls to school. I likes to keep them under my own eye. I suppose I needn't ask you now if you play?"
"A very little," said Phoebe, who rather piqued herself upon her music, and who was learned in Bach and Beethoven, and had an opinion of her own about Wagner. Mrs. Tom brightened visibly, for her girls played not a little, but a great deal.
"And draw?--but I needn't ask, for living in London, you've got masters at your very door."
"Not at all, I am sorry to say," said Phoebe, with a pathetic tone of regret in her voice.
"Lord bless us! Now who'd have thought it? I think nothing a sacrifice to give mine the best of education," said Mrs. Tom.
CHAPTER XIV.
STRANGERS.
"Well, Ursula, how do you do?" said Mrs. Sam Hurst, meeting her young neighbour with outstretched hands. She was a portly good-looking woman with an active mind, and nothing, or next to nothing to do, and instead of being affronted as some persons might have been, she was amused, and indeed flattered, by the suspicion and alarm with which all the young Mays regarded her. Whether she had the least intention of ever giving any justification to their alarms it would be impossible to say, for indeed to a sensible woman of forty-five, well to do and comfortable, a husband with "a temper of his own," and a large poor unruly family, was, perhaps, not so tempting as he appeared to be to his jealous children.
Phoebe, Junior Part 12
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Phoebe, Junior Part 12 summary
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