Fifty Contemporary One-Act Plays Part 104

[_Curtain._]

THE GRANDMOTHER

A PLAY BY LAJOS BIRO

Authorized Translation by Charles Recht.

Copyright, 1920, by Charles Recht.

All rights reserved.

CHARACTERS

THE GRANDMOTHER.

HER GRANDCHILDREN: THE BLOND YOUNG LADY.

THE BRUNETTE YOUNG LADY.

THE BRIDE.

THE VIVACIOUS GIRL.

THE MELANCHOLY GIRL.

THE SENTIMENTAL HIGH SCHOOL GIRL.

THE JOVIAL YOUNG MAN.

THE POLITE YOUNG MAN.

THE DISAGREEABLE YOUNG MAN.

All rights reserved by Charles Recht and John Biro, 47 West 42nd Street, New York. Applications for permission to produce THE GRANDMOTHER must be made to Mr. Charles Recht.

THE GRANDMOTHER

A PLAY BY LAJOS BIRO

[_There is only this notable thing to be said about Grandmother--her hair is snow white, her cheeks rosy and her eyes violet blue. She is the most youthful and enthusiastic, best and most cordial grandmother ever beloved by her grandchildren._

_The scene opens on a broad, sunny terrace furnished with garden furniture, chairs, small tables and chaises longues. Back of the terrace is the beautiful summer residence of Grandpa. Behind it is a large English garden in its lenten blossoms. The Disagreeable Young Man enters; yawns; stretches discontentedly; slouches here and there; picks up a volume from the table, then falls into a couch at right and, lighting a cigarette, begins to read. The other grandchildren enter in groups of two and three and seat themselves._]

THE JOVIAL YOUNG MAN. My word, children, I am too full for utterance.

What a spread! Now for a good cigar and a soft chair and I am as rich as a king.

THE BLOND YOUNG LADY. We are having such charming weather. Is not this park like a paradise?

THE BRUNETTE YOUNG LADY. How did you like the after-dinner speeches?

THE VIVACIOUS GIRL. Uncle Heinrich was splendid. [_There is great laughter._]

THE POLITE YOUNG MAN. Uncle Heinrich was never strong in speechmaking, but in the beginning even Demosthenes stuttered.

THE JOVIAL YOUNG MAN. The trouble is that Uncle Heinrich stopped where Demosthenes began. Besides a manufacturer has no time to parade on the sea sh.o.r.e with pebbles under his tongue.

[_There is more laughter._]

THE POLITE YOUNG MAN. Children, who wants a cigarette?

THE BLOND AND BRUNETTE YOUNG LADIES. I!

THE POLITE YOUNG MAN [_handing them cigarettes and lighting a match for them. He speaks to the Bride_]. Aren't you going to smoke?

BRIDE. No, I thank you.

THE JOVIAL YOUNG MAN. Lord, no! She must not! The n.o.ble bride must not permit tobacco smoke to contaminate her rosy lips. [_They all laugh._]

THE VIVACIOUS GIRL. May I have a cigarette, too?

THE JOVIAL YOUNG MAN. You be careful or the same misfortune may happen to you at any minute that happened to Lucy [_pointing to the Bride, he hands the Vivacious Girl a cigarette._]

THE VIVACIOUS GIRL. If my bridegroom shall object to tobacco smoke, he can pack his things and--off.

THE BRUNETTE YOUNG LADY. Well, young people, what are we going to do next?

THE MELANCHOLY YOUNG LADY. Let's remain here. The park looks so beautiful.

THE BLOND YOUNG LADY. Oh, I object. We'll remain here until the sun goes down a little and then we'll play tennis. [_They agree._]

THE MELANCHOLY YOUNG LADY. Can't we remain here? Let us enjoy the spring in the garden.

THE JOVIAL YOUNG MAN. Let's play tennis. A little exercise is the best cure for romance. And you can enjoy your spring out there as well--you dreamer. [_They laugh._]

THE DISAGREEABLE YOUNG MAN. You are as loud as the besiegers of Jericho in your planning.

THE JOVIAL YOUNG MAN. Behold! He speaketh. [_They laugh._]

THE DISAGREEABLE YOUNG MAN. You are so overbearing in your jollifications that it is positively disgusting. For the past hour you have been giggling away without the slightest reason. You have so much leisure you do not know what to do with yourselves.

THE BRUNETTE YOUNG LADY. Curt, must you always be the killjoy in a party!

THE DISAGREEABLE YOUNG MAN. If you would at least take yourselves off from here.

THE BRUNETTE YOUNG LADY. But admit that to-day there is reason enough for every kind of jollity.

THE DISAGREEABLE YOUNG MAN. Is there, indeed? You have finished a costly banquet and now are enjoying a good digestion. You are young and have a healthy animal appet.i.te; but why deck sentimentalism on your horns?