Verotchka's Tales Part 13

It is very rude to enter a house and then to insult the master. You must admit that a Turkey Gobbler is a very dignified and imposing bird.

There is surely no comparison between him and a Gray Porcupine.

Suddenly, everybody sided with Turkey Gobbler and there arose a terrific clatter.

"Porcupine probably thinks that all of us are foolish," said Rooster, flapping his wings.

"He insulted all of us! If any one is foolish, it is surely the Porcupine himself," said Gander, stretching his neck. "I noticed that at once."

"How can mushrooms be foolish?" answered Porcupine.

"Ladies and gentlemen, we are wasting time talking to him," shouted Rooster. "He will not understand us, anyway. If, instead, you, Mr.

Gander, were to grab his needles on one side, and Master Gobbler and I on the other side, we would at once know who is the wiser, for you cannot hide brains under foolish needles."

"I am ready," replied Gander. "It would be better still if I were to grab his needles in the back and you, Master Rooster, pecked his snout. Then, ladies and gentlemen, it will be seen who is the wisest."

Turkey Gobbler was silent all this time. At first, he was overwhelmed by the Porcupine's impudence and he did not know what answer to make.

Then Turkey Gobbler grew so angry, so angry that he was horrified at himself. His first wish was to throw himself upon the offender and tear him into tiny bits. Then would the world see and be convinced what a strict and serious bird a Turkey Gobbler is. He even started in Porcupine's direction, blowing himself up more and more, and just as he was about to throw himself upon Porcupine everybody began shouting and scolding the stranger. Turkey Gobbler stopped and waited patiently to see the end of it all.

When Rooster suggested that they grab Porcupine's needles and drag him in different directions, Turkey Gobbler stopped his ardor.

"Ladies and gentlemen," said he, "perhaps all this can be settled amicably. Yes, it seems to me there is a little misunderstanding here.

Leave the whole thing to me."

"Very well. Let us wait," agreed the Rooster, unwillingly. He was eager to fight Porcupine. "I know nothing will come of it."

"This is my affair," answered Turkey Gobbler calmly. "Just stay around and hear what I say."

All the birds formed a ring around Porcupine and waited.

Turkey Gobbler walked around the stranger, coughed and said:

"Listen, Mr. Porcupine. Let us have a serious explanation. In general, I do not like domestic troubles."

"Heavens! How wise! How wise he is!" thought Turkey Hen, listening to her husband, silent with admiration.

"First of all, I want you to understand that you are in respectable, well-behaved society," said Turkey Gobbler, "and that means something.

Yes, you may consider it an honor to get into our company."

"True! True!" shouted several.

"But this is between ourselves. The main thing is not ..." here Turkey Gobbler stopped, was silent a moment for better effect, then continued, "Yes, the main thing is--did you really think that we had no idea what a Porcupine was? I have no doubt that Gander was only joking when he took you for a mushroom. And I can say the same of what Rooster and the others said. Am I not right, ladies and gentlemen?"

"You certainly are, Turkey Gobbler," shouted the fowls in a voice so loud, that poor Gray Porcupine tucked in her little black snout.

"Oh, how wise he is!" thought Turkey Hen, beginning to understand what her husband was driving at.

"You see, Master Porcupine," continued Turkey Gobbler, "we all like our little jokes. I will not speak for myself. Why not have a little joke?

And as I see it, you, Mr. Porcupine, seem also to be of a merry disposition."

"And you guessed right," admitted Porcupine, once more showing his little black snout. "I have such a merry disposition that I cannot sleep at night. Many cannot stand that, but sleeping bores me."

"You will probably agree best with our Rooster, who crows like mad all night," said Turkey Gobbler.

Everybody suddenly became gay. They all felt Porcupine was there to complete their happiness.

Turkey Gobbler was triumphant at so cleverly getting out of an awkward situation caused by Porcupine's laughing in his face and calling him stupid.

"Now Mr. Porcupine," said Turkey Gobbler, winking, "confess that even you were joking when you said that I was not a wise bird."

"Of course, I was joking," said Porcupine, rea.s.suring him. "I have a merry disposition. I love to joke."

"Yes, yes, I was quite sure of that. Ladies and gentlemen, have you heard him?" asked Turkey Gobbler.

"Of course, we did. No one could doubt it. He was joking."

Turkey Gobbler bent close to Porcupine's ear and whispered:

"I want to tell you a horrible secret. But only on one condition--don't breathe it to a soul. It is true ... I am a little ashamed to talk about myself ... but how can I help it? I am the wisest bird! At times, it even embarra.s.ses me, but as the wise Russians say, 'You can't hide an awl in a sack.' Please not a word of this to anyone!"

[Ill.u.s.tration]

THE STORY OF LITTLE MILK, LITTLE CEREAL AND GRAY KITTEN, MOORKA

I

It was wonderful. It was wonderful that it happened every day. As soon as Cook placed the pot of milk and the earthenware oatmeal pan upon the stove, it would all begin. At first, there was silence; then conversation.

"I am Little Milk."

"And I am Little Cereal."

At first, conversation was carried on in whispers. But gradually both Little Cereal and Little Milk would grow more and more excited.

"I AM LITTLE MILK!"

"AND I AM LITTLE CEREAL!"

The cereal was generally covered with an earthenware cover and she grumbled away in her pot like an old woman. When she grew angry, there came to the top a bubble that burst and said:

"Still, I am Little Cereal. Puff!!"

This boasting was offensive to Little Milk.

"My what a wonder! As if one had never seen oatmeal cereal before!" and Little Milk would grow more and more excited until rising to the top in a foam, she tried to get out from the pot. No sooner would Cook turn her head away than Little Milk would run all over the hot stove.