The Andy Warhol Diaries Part 29

After going to dinner and then Club 78 at 78 Rue something and the Privilege, we got home at 4:00 in the morning and I called Jon Gould at Paramount Pictures in L.A. when I was drunk and I think I said a lot of wrong things.

Monday, April 6, 1981-Paris Saw the Christian Dior show and the Valentino show. With the male models, all the really straight-looking models are gay, and all the really gay-looking models are straight. And Christopher and I decided that we should start telling people that despite how we look and talk, that we're not gay. Because then they don't know what to do with you.

Wednesday, April 8, 1981-Vienna I got up early. I'd dreamt about Billy Name [see Introduction] [see Introduction], that he was living under the stairs at my house and doing somersaults, and everything was very colorful. It was so weird, because his friends sort of invaded my house and were acting crazy in colorful costumes and jumping up and down and having so much fun and they took over, they took over my life. It was so weird. It was like clowns. Everybody was a clown in a funny way, and they were just living there without letting me know, they'd come out in the morning when I wasn't there and they'd have a lot of fun and then they'd go back and live in the closet. And so I got up and Christopher had left all the lights on, and the windows were open and it was very beautiful.

Went to hunt for the loden coat I was trying to buy for Jon Gould. And Bruno Bischofberger said the best loden coats were in Zurich and Fred said the best were in Paris. But I think the best ones are in Vienna.

Then we had to meet a kid named Andre h.e.l.ler who has gold records and he owns all these paintings and wants me to do a drawing for his alb.u.m cover. He was taking us down underground to show us dead people who're petrified and they're all in their eighteenth-century clothes. Fred said it might be a good idea to go, that maybe we'd get ideas there.

So we met him and he gave us about twenty boxes of candy. Then we went down into the catacombs and we had to oooh and ahh at all the dead bodies, and it was really cold down there and he'd made us leave our candy behind and we didn't want to do that but we did, and this place was just hateful. I hated it a lot. Fred loved it.

Then Bruno took us back to the hotel. Fred wanted to go for another walk, but Christopher wanted to go cruising in the park, so we just threw our stuff down and walked the whole park and that was good exercise.

Thursday, April 9, 1981-Vienna Bruno came by because we had a really punctual meeting at 10:30 at the ministry with the lady Minister of Culture in Vienna. We met the curator of my Reversals show at the Vienna Museum of Twentieth-Century Art, I forget his name, and we saw the beautiful catalogues that they printed for the Reversal show which are really long and slim. Then we went to the hotel and freshened up before the show at 6:00. I talked to Vincent in New York and he said my headsheet had come in from Zoli. Have I told the Diary I've decided to become a male model? So then Fred got so overwrought-he thinks I'm crazy to start modeling. But it's something I want to do so I ignored him. Chris said Fred's just jealous.

So we got to the museum and it was an unbelievable crush, open to the public, and I'd never been in Vienna before so this was "See Andy now or you'll never see him again." And that lasted for two hours, and I had to sign shoes and a.s.ses, and I didn't even look up once.

Then finally Christopher couldn't stand it anymore and said that we had to leave, so we ran out past all the TV people and jumped into the car and it took us to a Viennese restaurant where we had hot dogs. Then to a great club called Chaca-all young, good-looking kids. Tangos and old Elvis songs and it was just the greatest.

Chris and I took this adorable boy, Martin, back to the hotel. We got him to take his s.h.i.+rt off and then we got him to take his pants off, too, and he had the craziest sort of Op Art underwear on and we took pictures and he did the best poses and then we gave him the car to go home in. One thing I've learned from Chris is that if you tell anybody to do anything, they just do it. Especially models and actors. And then I saw a Telex from Jon Gould, he's back in New York, and it was a really nice note and then I felt great.

Monday, April 13, 1981- Paris-New York I'd packed till 2:30 in the morning and then took a Valium and had a really good sound sleep. Then Fred was knocking at my door and Chris Makos called and he was rarin' to go. Chris is just the perfect companion for me. He's everything I've ever wanted. He's pushy but then he's not pushy. And he's a child. And he goes off to s.e.x parties and comes back satisfied with his pipes cleaned, and he's so in love with his lover, Peter, he's really considerate, and when he goes places he can't wait to leave-just like me-and he gets me to go running all over and even though he's now got me carrying his his knapsack, I don't mind because it's all exciting and he makes me feel young. I've offered Chris a reward-this wrist.w.a.tch he wants-if he can get Jon Gould to fall for me. It's confusing because Jon tries to keep a straight image, he tells me he's not gay, that he can't ... but I mean ... knapsack, I don't mind because it's all exciting and he makes me feel young. I've offered Chris a reward-this wrist.w.a.tch he wants-if he can get Jon Gould to fall for me. It's confusing because Jon tries to keep a straight image, he tells me he's not gay, that he can't ... but I mean ...

Took the Concorde, got home at 9 A.M A.M. on the dot. I called Jon Gould and he said he couldn't talk, his tub was overflowing.

Cabbed ($4) downtown. Talked to Marc Balet, he was at the office, he designed the Zoli agency book that I'm in-the catalogue of their models. I already got some job offers, I'm officially a male model now.

Doria Reagan came to work. And then I looked out the window and I saw Ron walking along the street alone and he was wearing bright red, and I mean, if I could pick him out from the window ... And Doria knew where everything was, she said, "There's three Secret Service in the front and four in the back." They walked up the stairs because the elevator was broken.

And then I wanted to see Barbara Stanwyck that night at Lincoln Center, she was getting the Film Society annual award, and so I called Sue Salter the publicist and she was just rotten. She said, "Oh my dear, they're all sold out," and I told her, you know, "We've really done so much for you," and she said she would try to find one ticket, but that I would have to pay, and that she could get me two tickets but that they would cost $250, so I said, "That'll be just fine." At least now they can't ask me for any more favors. Maybe the best thing to do is always pay, and then they can't ask you for a thing. But last year they gave me free tickets.

Jon Gould asked me to pick him up so Chris Makos and I did. We walked over to Alice Tully Hall and there were a lot of empty seats so I was really hating Sue Salter down to my toes. But at least the seats were good, row J. And the Barbara Stanwyck clips were great, although at the end it got boring because they used the same ones too much. At 11:30 Chris dropped me off.

Tuesday, April 14, 1981 Worked till 5:30. Jon Gould invited me to a screening of Atlantic City Atlantic City that he was giving for his crowd. Cabbed to Paramount ($7). Lady McCrady and Jonathan Roberts were there, and Katy Dobbs who was also in that Radcliffe publis.h.i.+ng course that all those kids took. that he was giving for his crowd. Cabbed to Paramount ($7). Lady McCrady and Jonathan Roberts were there, and Katy Dobbs who was also in that Radcliffe publis.h.i.+ng course that all those kids took.

And I ran into a guy who'd seen my picture in the Zoli book and offered me a job. Fred is still furious, he said I should be getting thousands for endorsing products, not working for modeling fees. But I think it's funny to be just another pretty face in the Zoli book. I told him to lighten up.

Wednesday, April 15, 1981 Had a sleepless night. Watched the astronauts coming back on the shuttle on the Today Show Today Show. They're really cute. Did you ever notice how old they look after the s.p.a.ce flights? They send up these good-looking guys and get back these tired-looking people.

Went up to Carl Fischer's for my first Sony commercial. They were already waiting, setting up. And they were talking about the other artists they'd like to get for the series, they mentioned Duchamp and Pica.s.so. Seriously. I honestly don't think they knew they were dead. Maurice Sendak was the only other live one they mentioned besides me. And Peter Max.

And they had some food in another room but they didn't offer me any, the execs were coming in eating cheese and saying things like, "This is a good spread," things that sound just like the commercials. And people really do talk that way, they really are like ad people.

Everyone was telling me how wonnnnnnderful I looked thin, but I feel so weak.

Went to Xenon and that was fun. I met the Moynihan girl, Maura, and her roommate Aysie, Senator Warner's daughter-her mother's a Mellon. And then my hair started to look too fake in the blue light so (laughs) (laughs) I knew it was time to leave. I knew it was time to leave.

Thursday, April 16, 1981 Got up early and it looked beautiful out, but I'm in this period where I think, What is it all about? You do this and what does it mean, and you do that and what does it mean? What is it all about? You do this and what does it mean, and you do that and what does it mean?

Really I'm in a strange period, I put off telling the Diary about my emotional problems because last Christmas when I was having all the fights with Jed and he moved out, I couldn't face talking about it, and now I'm living alone and in a way I'm relieved, but then I don't want to be by myself in this big house with just Nena and Aurora and Archie and Amos. I've got these desperate feelings that nothing means anything. And then I decide that I should try to fall in love, and that's what I'm doing now with Jon Gould, but then it's just too hard. I mean, you think about a person constantly and it's just a fantasy, it's not real, and then it gets so involved, you have to see them all the time and then it winds up that it's just a job like everything else, so I don't know. But Jon is a good person to be in love with because he has his own career, and I can develop movie ideas with him, you know? And maybe he can even convince Paramount to advertise in Interview Interview, too. Right? So my crush on him will be good for business.

Oh, and the most interesting thing was seeing Lou Reed on the street in the Village with his wife. She's nothing special, just a little s.e.xy girl. I told him that I'd just been reading about him in People People and I asked him why he doesn't come over and see us, and he said it's because he doesn't know any of the people anymore, and then he asked if Ronnie was still around, and I said yes, and then if Vincent was still around, and I said yes, and if PH was still around, and I said yes, so it was funny. Went home. and I asked him why he doesn't come over and see us, and he said it's because he doesn't know any of the people anymore, and then he asked if Ronnie was still around, and I said yes, and then if Vincent was still around, and I said yes, and if PH was still around, and I said yes, so it was funny. Went home.

I cooked an early Easter dinner and it smelled like the old days when PH used to come up and cook me cabbage with caraway seeds and onions. Jon was a little late because he had to go to Macy's to return some sheets. He brought me an Easter basket, it was kind of plain. I gave him a tour of the whole house to impress him, and I was hinting like crazy that it could all be his, that there was a room with his name on it.

Then we went to see Excalibur Excalibur. The s.e.x scenes were a little corny but beautifully done. He had his armor on when they were having s.e.x. And then the focus was so soft. And I was so confused, I always thought Camelot was a real place. So after the movie we walked back home. I'd given Jon a rabbit puppet and he was waving at people with it. He's going to his family's house in Ma.s.sachusetts for Easter.

Friday, April 17, 1981 I was depressed, I decided to pa.s.s out Interviews Interviews. After I did that I went to the office and I ran into the Moynihan girl, Maura, who was arriving two days late for lunch (cab $5). And now that the Soho News Soho News had Dominique Sanda on its cover this week, it'd be too tacky to have her as our cover girl, so maybe we'll use this Moynihan girl as our cover because she's cute and smart-she went to Harvard-and she has a rock band. had Dominique Sanda on its cover this week, it'd be too tacky to have her as our cover girl, so maybe we'll use this Moynihan girl as our cover because she's cute and smart-she went to Harvard-and she has a rock band.

Chris Makos called me from Palm Beach where it was so sunny and he was with his boyfriend Peter and that depressed me, they'd just gotten there.

Worked till 6:30. Rupert invited me to an all-boy party on Bleecker Street, but I was too depressed. Ate at the Bra.s.serie ($40). Went home lonely and despondent because n.o.body loves me and it's Easter, and I cried.

Sat.u.r.day, April 18, 1981 Chris Makos had called me at 9:00 from Florida and he was so happy, so he depressed me again. I'm up to ten pushups but my situps are really bad. I moped around, my mind was somewhere else. Started work at 12:30 and worked till 7:00. Rupert got thirty calls and I didn't get one.

Picked up John Reinhold and we went to meet Tom Baker at the Playhouse on West 48th Street to see Sylvia Miles's one-woman show (cab $5, tickets $45). The sets were done well, it was a reproduction of her apartment, it had my Marilyn and the play mentioned me a few times. Then afterwards we went backstage and Sylvia had telegrams up and flowers and posters and that's just the kind of thing she loves, and I was so embarra.s.sed I hadn't done anything like that for her, I'll have to send her champagne. Then we dropped John Reinhold at home because he felt guilty because it was Pa.s.sover. Tom and I talked about Jim Morrison and Tom said they'd pick up three girls and then Jim would pa.s.s out and he'd have to f.u.c.k them all. Stayed till 4:00. Cab dropped Tom ($5).

Sunday, April 19, 1981 Easter. I was in a really depressed mood. It was Sunday so Jed had come and taken the dogs for the day. I cried three times. I decided to pull myself together and go to church.

Monday, April 20, 1981 The weather was slightly coolish so I had on a jacket and my backpack. Vincent talked to our landlord at 860 and he said the fifth floor that's vacant rents for $7,500 a month! We pay about $2,300 for our floor, so I mean, I really really should buy a building. We need more room for should buy a building. We need more room for Interview Interview and rents are ridiculous. And when our lease is up, ours'll really go up, too. and rents are ridiculous. And when our lease is up, ours'll really go up, too.

Janet Villella called and said she'd pick me up in her limo to go to the ABT opening at Lincoln Center.

Suzie Frankfurt called and said that they foreclosed on John Samuels's father's 79th Street house. It was sold on the courthouse steps to the Brazilians.

Tried to find my black tie. Janet picked me up at 7:00.

The most jolting thing that happened at the ballet was this woman came over and said, "Hi, do you know who I am?" and I said no, and she said, "Lila Davies." I went to school with her at Carnegie Tech, and she was one of the people who we all lived together with on 103rd Street in the fifties. She had her eighteen-year-old son with her. They live in Cleveland. And then I felt old, because her son looked like she did when I knew her. I felt old and grey and tired and out of it. And I invited her to lunch at the office. And now I've been thinking that all my problems are because I'm feeling old. And I'm seeing all these young kids just budding. So I've pinpointed the problem.

G.o.dunov sprained his back so he was out, and Gelsey Kirkland was really good. Then Misha did "Push Comes to Shove" and everybody loved that because he's a star. Afterward they were having a free dinner across the way. Sondra and Chris Gilman were there. Anna Sosenko who wrote songs for Hildegarde was there. She's in the autograph business now and when I told her how many Interviews Interviews I signed a day she said to stop immediately, that my signature will be worthless. I signed a day she said to stop immediately, that my signature will be worthless.

Tuesday, April 21, 1981 They just found another body in the Atlanta killings, the twenty-fifth, I think. And I was thinking about it: If I had a little kid and she was murdered, I would go out and kill the person myself, even if I landed in jail. I would do that. I'm sure of it. It's just incredible that they don't have any clues at all in twenty-five murders.

Brigid had invited Rod McKuen to lunch, he used to sleep on her sofa when he was broke. He just moved to town and he called her up. She went to Balducci's and was really putting on the dog. So we sat there and had lunch and gee, I tried to figure out what was fascinating about him, why he's so big, and I just couldn't.

And John Wallowitch called. I raved to him about seeing him playing the piano on cable TV, and I told him to come to the office. He was calling to tell me that his brother Eddie, my first boyfriend about twenty-five years ago-that he just went down to Florida to visit Eddie and found him bloated and dead in his house. He'd been drinking, gone off A.A. and had a fit. He always got depressed and I never knew why because he was good-looking and he was a photographer. John didn't want to look at the body, so a friend came over and identified it.

I went to Ashton Hawkins's dinner at 17 East 89th Street, my old neighborhood, so it made me feel funny. The real howdy-doody heavy duties were there-Brooke Astor, Laurance Rockefeller, Alice Arlen. And Mike Nichols's hair, I don't think it's fake, it looks so great, so really great. Ashton had a rent-a-maid, one of those old Irish types like from Schrafft's, the cute Irish ladies with the d.y.k.ey Va.s.sar haircuts in black uniforms and white collars. Brooke Astor said she was trying to save the South Bronx-the old people and the poor people. Mary McFadden was there with her escort, Stephen Paley, and I made believe Bob hadn't told me anything about her divorce, about the guy stealing all her stuff. I said, "You look pretty," and she said, "I'm desperate." I told her to just go out and buy herself a new Yves St. Laurent dress and she started to hit me and she's strong.

Then I asked her if she wanted to arm wrestle and we did and then she started to like me and that got strange. I felt bad because I think I hurt her hand.

Went home. I called Jon Gould at the Beverly Wils.h.i.+re. Then I went to bed and had the most un-sleepful night. Woke up at 3:00 and had a big gla.s.s of brandy and a Valium.

Wednesday, April 22, 1981 Didn't sleep well, I'll have to stop drinking so much coffee and just eat more healthy food and cut out liquor, too. I did my exercises in a hurry and I'm up to ten pushups and then eight and eight situps.

Lila Davies called and cancelled coming to lunch because she had tickets to Amadeus Amadeus.

Friday, April 24, 1981 Pa.s.sed out Interviews Interviews this morning. Had to meet Donald Trump at the office (cab $5.50). Marc Balet had set up this meeting. I keep forgetting that Marc gave up architecture to become an art director, but he still builds models at home, he told me. He's designing a catalogue for all the stores in the atrium at the Trump Tower and he told Donald Trump that I should do a portrait of the building that would hang over the entrance to the residential part. So they came down to talk about that. Donald Trump is really good-looking. A girl named Evans was with him and another lady. It was so strange, these people are so rich. They talked about buying a building yesterday for $500 million or something. They raved about the Balducci's lunch, but they just picked at it. I guess because they go around to so many things where there's food. And they didn't have drinks, they all just had Tabs. He's a butch guy. Nothing was settled, but I'm going to do some paintings, anyway, and show them to them. this morning. Had to meet Donald Trump at the office (cab $5.50). Marc Balet had set up this meeting. I keep forgetting that Marc gave up architecture to become an art director, but he still builds models at home, he told me. He's designing a catalogue for all the stores in the atrium at the Trump Tower and he told Donald Trump that I should do a portrait of the building that would hang over the entrance to the residential part. So they came down to talk about that. Donald Trump is really good-looking. A girl named Evans was with him and another lady. It was so strange, these people are so rich. They talked about buying a building yesterday for $500 million or something. They raved about the Balducci's lunch, but they just picked at it. I guess because they go around to so many things where there's food. And they didn't have drinks, they all just had Tabs. He's a butch guy. Nothing was settled, but I'm going to do some paintings, anyway, and show them to them.

Sunday, April 26, 1981 It was such a pretty day. Jon Gould walked me all the way downtown to the office, then he went to the gym and I went to work. I did some Madonnas. Then I went to church for a minute. Chris Makos called and I said I was just too exhausted to make reservations anywhere for dinner, so he did, at Da Silvano. Jon called and he said he was free, so I picked him up at work, and cabbed down to Da Silvano ($8). It's just expensive Italian food that they try to do well (dinner $140). And Catherine Guinness's friend Anna Wintour was there with Michael Stone, and I couldn't remember her name at first, but then I did. She was just hired by New York New York magazine to be their fas.h.i.+on editor. She wanted to work for magazine to be their fas.h.i.+on editor. She wanted to work for Interview Interview but we didn't hire her. Maybe we should have, we do need a fas.h.i.+on person, but-I don't think she knows how to dress, she's actually a terrible dresser. but we didn't hire her. Maybe we should have, we do need a fas.h.i.+on person, but-I don't think she knows how to dress, she's actually a terrible dresser.

Jon dropped me off and I got home and crawled into bed and fell asleep.

Wednesday, April 29, 1981 Brigid said "Jon Gould of Paramount Pictures" had called the office four times and she was snide about it, but I told her we were working on a script together. When I called him back he was at lunch.

And Christopher brought up two barbells and I could hardly lift them. I'm up to two sets of ten pushups and one set of ten situps. Jon called back and said his rented car was towed from 75th and Columbus and that it was my fault because I'd told him it wouldn't be. He thought it was stolen, but then the police called Hertz.

Donna, one of the girls in Can Can Can Can, called and invited me to the show on Sat.u.r.day, and I called Tom Cas.h.i.+n to find out if Jed was going, because if he was I didn't want to go. Donna's the girl from Best Little Wh.o.r.ehouse Best Little Wh.o.r.ehouse who Tom was seeing during the show. She understudies the other girl, and on Thursdays she does a real role. who Tom was seeing during the show. She understudies the other girl, and on Thursdays she does a real role.

Faye from Halston's called and wanted to know if I wanted to be his date for the opening of Little Foxes Little Foxes on May 7, but that's Jon's birthday. So I asked Faye if I could have an extra ticket because it would solve a birthday problem. Faye didn't sound too happy, I think Halston really wanted to go with just me. on May 7, but that's Jon's birthday. So I asked Faye if I could have an extra ticket because it would solve a birthday problem. Faye didn't sound too happy, I think Halston really wanted to go with just me.

Thursday, April 30, 1981 Went to 667 Madison to Janet Sartin's for a facial. I got shoved in a room and a fat lady made me take off all my clothes. So then Janet came in and said, "This young lady will do you," and this young lady was about sixty-five. She put a hot towel on me and it was like heaven. Janet looks good-her face is pretty-but she has a lot of crow's feet. And I think it's because she believes in astringent-I'm sure that dries it out. She told me she does Bianca and I said, "Bianca has the greatest skin," and she said, "That's my skin!"

Nena and Aurora's brother, Agosto, came down to the office, the one who's small and adorable who was a Marine. Vincent talked to him about a job.

Went home then picked up Jon (cab $4, tickets $60) and went to the Minskoff.

At Can Can Can Can we had good seats, in the same row as Ethel Merman. I told Ethel I wanted to see her back up there. And then we ran into Donald Trump and the dollar-a-year man for the city who has the building company, Walsh, and their wives. And it was so much fun to see Donald Trump again so soon in a different place. And I chit-chatted with the Czechoslovakian wife, and Jon Gould chit-chatted with Trump. I love going out with Jon because it's like being on a real date-he's tall and strong and I feel that he can take care of me. And it's exciting because he acts straight so I'm sure people think he is. we had good seats, in the same row as Ethel Merman. I told Ethel I wanted to see her back up there. And then we ran into Donald Trump and the dollar-a-year man for the city who has the building company, Walsh, and their wives. And it was so much fun to see Donald Trump again so soon in a different place. And I chit-chatted with the Czechoslovakian wife, and Jon Gould chit-chatted with Trump. I love going out with Jon because it's like being on a real date-he's tall and strong and I feel that he can take care of me. And it's exciting because he acts straight so I'm sure people think he is.

When I got home there was a note from Jenette Kahn to call her when I got in, no matter what time, so I did, and she said Sharon Hammond was getting married to her lord the next day at 5:00 and I was invited to the reception from 6:00 to 12:00.

Monday, May 4, 1981 I had a death threat, I'll get to it.

I ran over to Janet Sartin's for my appointment. Then she came in and said, "Oh darling, your office called about ten minutes ago, Vincent and Robyn, and they said it's very important." So I called them back and they said that that kid Joey Sutton had called forty times. And he'd sent me a note last week-Vincent didn't open it, I did-that said: "Beware of May 5, it's Live or Die." He's been hallucinating a theory that I stole Mick Jagger's song "Miss You" from him him and gave it to Mick Jagger to record. I don't know what he's talking about ... I don't even know if this kid really writes songs. He's ... disturbed. and gave it to Mick Jagger to record. I don't know what he's talking about ... I don't even know if this kid really writes songs. He's ... disturbed.

So after Janet Sartin I went to Sporting World to buy a hat to disguise myself. I got a camouflage hunter's hat ($27). Made phone calls ($2). Called Jon to tell him someone was threatening my life and when I finally got him (laughs) (laughs) he didn't care. People were still asking for autographs, though, so I bought he didn't care. People were still asking for autographs, though, so I bought more more disguises ($15.74) and then cabbed to Park and 18th ($5.50). Robyn was waiting for me there. A Detective Rooney or something like that from the NYPD came over. And Risa d.i.c.kstein, she's disguises ($15.74) and then cabbed to Park and 18th ($5.50). Robyn was waiting for me there. A Detective Rooney or something like that from the NYPD came over. And Risa d.i.c.kstein, she's Interview's Interview's lawyer, said she has a detective we can hire, but I'm going to hire Agosto to be my bodyguard and go places with me. lawyer, said she has a detective we can hire, but I'm going to hire Agosto to be my bodyguard and go places with me.

Anyway, I wrapped some presents and then was picked up by Jon Gould and we went to La Grenouille to meet Chris Makos and Peter Wise (cab $6). The place was crowded with funny Miami Beach people. We got an up-front table. And all the other people in the restaurant were jealous because we were having so much fun, they wanted to join the party. We'd brought gifts for each other and we were opening our gifts. For dessert we ordered two souffles and champagne. And money is the best gift so I gave Jon and Peter each $100 in one-dollar bills. And I also gave Peter $25 rolls of pennies which were so heavy. And Jon I gave $80 of Susan B. Anthony dollars. Jon gave Peter a teapot and a big mixing bowl. I gave them all silver clothespins for their letters. We were there till about midnight having a good time, and we were blowing bubbles and Marcel the captain got a little mad at that (dinner $400).

Tuesday, May 5, 1981 Vincent hired some security. He didn't want me to come to the office, but I had work to do.

Peter Wise told me that I should get a bulletproof vest, that he knew where you could get them. I was a chatterbox because I was nervous. Went down to 11th and University Place to a funny shop on the second floor (cab $6). Peter had called Christopher to meet me there and take photographs. I bought a bulletproof vest ($270). The guy was really creepy, he said his business had really soared after the Reagan thing. He had dresses and coats and everything bulletproof, and there was a sports jacket I asked him to hold for me, that I'd come back and pick up, and it seems really warm for winter, too. We asked him what else he had, and he said he wouldn't say in front of the media, because a journalist from Stern Stern came there with us, so Christopher can't wait to go back there to see what he's got that he wouldn't say. Then Christopher had his bike downstairs but I couldn't even get on it, with my backpack. I called Jay Shriver at the office and he came to meet me around the back of the building. Went up in the freight elevator. came there with us, so Christopher can't wait to go back there to see what he's got that he wouldn't say. Then Christopher had his bike downstairs but I couldn't even get on it, with my backpack. I called Jay Shriver at the office and he came to meet me around the back of the building. Went up in the freight elevator.

Then it was the busiest day ever. The cop we rented couldn't believe all the freaks we have up there. And there's always some new girl at Interview Interview who'll buzz who'll buzz anybody anybody in. I called Jon at Paramount, he was in meetings. Bob didn't come down to the office. in. I called Jon at Paramount, he was in meetings. Bob didn't come down to the office.

Brigid's jealous because I've lost all this weight, but she looks better with her face filled in a little. She got rid of her cat Billy because he was sick with a virus so she's heartless and cruel. I told her, "You're no good." And she just says she doesn't want to talk about it, she's waiting for a new cat to come in at the store.

Jackie Curtis came up and she just has dyed hair, but short. He'd been to Gstaad and had a really handsome boyfriend with her, I don't know how she does it, and she's fat and smelled of liquor and she was limping so it was really pathetic. She brought me a shopping bag. [Note: when Andy talked about men who wore women's clothes or makeup, he would randomly refer to them as "he" or "she."] [Note: when Andy talked about men who wore women's clothes or makeup, he would randomly refer to them as "he" or "she."]

Oh, and that guy at that shop said he made a bulletproof raincoat for the pope. And disguises don't seem to work for me-I'm going to get a fisherman's hat tomorrow. I think that's the best, like Mr. Winters used to wear.

Picked up Jon on the corner of 18th between Eighth and Ninth and we went to Chris Makos's on Waverly Place (cab $9). Found a Citibank machine and Jon used it, and I've never done one before and it's so exciting, it asks you questions.

Wednesday, May 6, 1981 I called Jay Shriver at the office and he came downstairs to meet me and get me in safely, and the place was busy with people. Lunch was for Sylvia Miles and she was already there.

Jon called and said that he was trying to get a reservation for his Gulf + Western boss Charles Bluhdorn who wanted to take Barry Diller to dinner at "87" and he wanted to know if I could help him. It's a new restaurant and it's very small and hard to get into. But I mean, no restaurant's that big a deal. So I called Henry Geldzahler, the commish, and he said that okay he would call and try but only because Charles Bluhdorn had given $2 million to the city last year. So he tried and they said it was impossible. So I called Jon back and he was thinking he was going to lose his job, but then Bluhdorn cancelled the dinner anyway.

Cab to the Ritz ($4). Neil Bogart was giving a Prom Night party. Downstairs one of those boring fans was dancing and smoking joints and acting crazy, and he wanted to come upstairs with me but he didn't have a pa.s.s. I decided to have a hot dog, it was Nathan's, it was good. And then that kid somehow got up and was sitting with us, and then Eva, the lady journalist from Stern Stern, did a great thing-she started telling him that she didn't know what she was doing with the Andy Warhol double. She said she was a second-string reporter at Stern Stern and they didn't even get her the and they didn't even get her the real real Andy Warhol to interview, they got her the double, and what was she doing in such a second-rate position, and somehow he believed her, he just got right up and left, and he wouldn't talk to me for the rest of the night. He thought I was a fake Andy Warhol. Isn't that great? Then we left and I invited the German lady to Xenon for Grace Jones's show. Andy Warhol to interview, they got her the double, and what was she doing in such a second-rate position, and somehow he believed her, he just got right up and left, and he wouldn't talk to me for the rest of the night. He thought I was a fake Andy Warhol. Isn't that great? Then we left and I invited the German lady to Xenon for Grace Jones's show.

Thursday, May 7, 1981 Cab to Mercer Street to have my pictures taken with my Myth prints (cab $8). Rupert was waiting on the street corner because he wasn't sure where to go. The people from Stern Stern were already there. They just put me in front of the Myths, and I almost threw up, they looked so sixties. I'm not kidding, they really did. were already there. They just put me in front of the Myths, and I almost threw up, they looked so sixties. I'm not kidding, they really did.

Glued myself together and picked up Jon Gould and we went to the theater to see Little Foxes Little Foxes, and there was the biggest crowd. We had first-row seats, in front of Halston and Liza and Mark. Liz Taylor's mother was there, she was cute, like Janet Gaynor. Lots and lots of curtain calls, they would've gone on forever. They dragged Lillian h.e.l.lman onstage. Then we went backstage. Senator Warner said hi to me. I told the colored maid how great she was and so was Dennis Christopher.

Jon and I left and went to the birthday party that Lady McCrady was giving for him at 15 or 17 Park Avenue, which is actually the backyard of where I used to live in Murray Hill. And I was talking to this blonde girl for a while and this guy said, "I bet you don't know who you were talking to," and I said no, that I didn't, and he said, "That's Rita Jenrette, the congressman's wife who posed for Playboy." Playboy." She said she lives smack in Harlem-I guess either she has no money or a black boyfriend. She's really kooky and really bright. Jon dropped me home and he came in for five minutes and then he left. She said she lives smack in Harlem-I guess either she has no money or a black boyfriend. She's really kooky and really bright. Jon dropped me home and he came in for five minutes and then he left.

Sunday, May 10, 1981 Tried calling Jon several times. Then I went to Ron Link's play, and as soon as I got home, Jon called, but I was so upset by that time that I couldn't even talk. Went to bed at 12:30.

Monday, May 11, 1981 Made an appointment with Doc c.o.x for Tuesday because my weight is so down and I don't want to get sick. 120.

Bob had arranged for us to go to a dinner that Earl Blackwell and Eugenia Sheppard were setting up for the Sacklers. I got a limo and was asked to bring a girl so I picked up Barbara Allen and we went to Doubles. I had a black tie on but I should have worn black pants because I had jeans on and those waiters were all looking at me funny. It was a really heavy-duty dinner. All the right people were there. Andy Stein was there and I told him if he wanted to have really beautiful skin he should go to Janet Sartin, and he told me I should go to his gym place, so we're going to exchange numbers.

Then over the speakers came "Happy Birthday," so everyone thought it was Mr. Sackler's birthday, but it turned out they piped it into the wrong room by mistake. I just couldn't take another Taurus birthday, I hate them. A little dancing. Eugenia was so cute, she's a Leo and she said, "My boyfriend is a Taurus," so I guess she and Earl are a couple. I guess it's like a mother. Well, I'm in that category, too.

Then I called Jon and Barbara Allen and I went over to his apartment on the West Side and I spent an hour counting pennies with him-he was balancing his budget-and he was rereading Popish Popish and asking serious meaningful questions about it and I couldn't take it, it was too dumb. Left at 1:00. and asking serious meaningful questions about it and I couldn't take it, it was too dumb. Left at 1:00.

Tuesday, May 12, 1981 Got up at 7:30 7:30 and called Chris Makos to discuss the evening before with Jon Gould. I've offered Chris a reward-this one gold watch he wants-if he can talk Jon into doing something with me, but even if nothing romantic happens now, I still want Jon to move in, because then we'd see what happens from there. and called Chris Makos to discuss the evening before with Jon Gould. I've offered Chris a reward-this one gold watch he wants-if he can talk Jon into doing something with me, but even if nothing romantic happens now, I still want Jon to move in, because then we'd see what happens from there.

I had a 10:00 appointment with Doc c.o.x and I decided to get exercise and walk to his office, but it wasn't a good idea, I was overwalked and tired by the time I got there. And the Doc didn't really care about me. His hair was dyed and he was pudgy and he just wanted to hear gossip. He gave me some salve, and then he said I had to get polio, teta.n.u.s, and pneumonia shots, and I didn't want to, I said I'd do it some other day, but Rosemary grabbed me on the way out and gave them all to me and she said I wouldn't have reactions, but I felt funny all day.

Wednesday, May 13, 1981 I had a lunch at 12:00, Charlie Cowles was coming with Sid and Anne Ba.s.s and when I got down there he was already there, and everybody was gathered around the TV and the pope had been shot. I started screaming, I got so mad-"We lost a portrait that day when Reagan was shot and I don't want it to happen again! Turn that TV off!"

So the Ba.s.ses came and looked at their portraits, and I have to change some lips and do a whole bunch of new ones. I was down to 119 and I really got scared. My stomach's shrunk.

Ronnie came with me to Art Kane's studio at 28th and Broadway to pose for a ten-page spread in Italian Vogue Vogue. There was a Zoli model there who was a stand-in for me, and he had a great body. The spread was that this guy was murdering a girl with black panties over his face. The model was the grandson of Goldwater and we're doing him for Interview Interview. Then the panties came off the face and it was actually me who was stabbing the girl in the pictures. So it only took an hour for me to do my part, and it was easy-she put her heel in me and it was really fun. Then we left and it was great to walk, it was really spring.

Got a call from Jon in Hollywood. Then I tried to call Bill Copley all day to make an appointment when we could tape for the play I'm dying to do on his life.

I had eight dinner invitations.

Went to Halston's and Liza Minnelli was there. They had a copy of the Post Post there that had "POPE SHOT" in red. It was great. And then we were talking about bulletproof vests. Liza said that she wasn't afraid of blacks there that had "POPE SHOT" in red. It was great. And then we were talking about bulletproof vests. Liza said that she wasn't afraid of blacks (laughs) (laughs) because her father had given Lena Home a job. because her father had given Lena Home a job.

Thursday, May 14, 1981 Chris Makos came up and we went up to the Trump building with Marc Balet to photograph the architectural model of the building to make the portrait from (cab $5). I was so thin I decided to have a c.o.ke and that was such a heavy trip because my stomach had shrunk so much.

Then cabbed to Bill Copley's ($8) and Bill was sober and he's lost weight. He said that in Key West he was smoking and set himself on fire, and he went to the hospital and they treated him and released him and then the wife served him with papers. But he's still crazy about her-he's decided to buy the two surplus portraits of her that I did, I don't know what he'll do with them. Remember, this is the wife who was the ex-madam.

Sunday, May 17, 1981 We went to the Savoy, Francois de Menil's birthday party at his new club, and it was wall-to-wall people. There were supposed to be 600 people there and it looked like there were, and I think I knew every single person. Earl McGrath, Ahmet and Mica Ertegun, Debbie Harry who's now got brown hair and looks so normal and ordinary, she was cute. n.o.body really took pictures of Ina Ginsburg's date, G.o.dunov, I guess they just thought he was a long-haired blond hippie in a black leather jacket. Bob was with the Sta.s.sinopoulos lady, the one who wrote the Maria Callas book.

Then I kept running into strange-looking people who said they were "co-owners" of the club and I started getting worried about Francois.

Philippa de Menil was introducing Heiner as her husband, so I guess maybe they got married. I got drunk and got up to dance and people took pictures. Me with the girlfriend of Stephen Graham. Then the Pointer Sisters came on and sang "Happy Birthday." It was fun to see my boss, Zoli, there-I felt like a working girl. And I went up to John Belus.h.i.+ and said, "You never remember me," because that's what he he said to said to me me twice when I didn't know who he was. And then we danced together, that was fun. twice when I didn't know who he was. And then we danced together, that was fun.

Got home at 2:00 and Christopher called and said he was just at the Baths. I called Jon at the Beverly Wils.h.i.+re.

Thursday, May 21, 1981 There was a message for me when I got home that Jon Gould had called and said he was getting the red-eye and would be in New York at 7 A.M A.M. and waiting at 8:00 for Christopher to pick him up to go to Cape Cod. I had so much to pack-costumes, film, cameras, radios, TV-that I didn't get it all done.

Friday, May 22, 1981 - New York-East Falmouth, Ma.s.sachusetts Peter Wise was waiting for Jon and Chris and me when we landed. The plane cost about $800 $800, but I paid by check. Peter took us to his house and gave us a tour of the place all the way back to his greenhouse. And we got room a.s.signments, and Vincent and Sh.e.l.ly were planning to come up after work and we spent all day and all night waiting for them.

I saw this big boat on the water that was half painted and it was so pretty and such a nutty boat and it looked like we could have a party on it. Then Peter and Christopher took us around to show us the town. Peter bought chowder at Mildred's Chowder House in Hyannis, which they say is the best chowder place in really all of New England. Vincent and Sh.e.l.ly finally arrived, it took them eight hours to drive up and it should have only taken five.