The Andy Warhol Diaries Part 54

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And I finally read a Xerox of Tama's story from The New Yorker The New Yorker and it was fun reading all about what life was like living with Ronnie-she calls him "Stash" in the story-and she made herself "Eleanor," and not a writer but a jewelry designer. and it was fun reading all about what life was like living with Ronnie-she calls him "Stash" in the story-and she made herself "Eleanor," and not a writer but a jewelry designer.

And none of the people that I'm with a lot now drink or anything. Wilfredo doesn't drink and Paige doesn't. And last night PH reminded me about how I used to put people down for not drinking, that I'd say, "They think they're too good to drink," and it's true, I did used to feel that way, but when you don't drink yourself, you sure see things differently.

Thursday, October 17, 1985 Called Rupert early in the morning and got his "wife" on the phone and I'm going to tell Rupert he's really got to get rid of him. I can just see the whole thing-he'll want a house and a dog and a car in a settlement. I mean, this is a real nag. But when you tell people, they don't listen to anything when they're in love. Instead they go tell the person you're talking about what you said. It's human nature. They're in love and they don't see it and they blab.

Vincent said the Times was going to write about our TV show, Fifteen Minutes Fifteen Minutes. And it got a great review in the Voice Voice this week. this week.

Went over to the Forbes boat for the annual benefit for Jonas Mekas's archives. Jonas bought a new building. I saw him and he laughed and said his horoscope had said don't buy real estate and he bought it for $50,000 and now it's worth a million. I don't know why these Hollywood people don't give Jonas prints of just everything everything. He's one of the only people who still really cares. They should just give him things. I can't believe that Hollywood doesn't even have one film museum. It's just disgusting. You'd think they could at least do that. And s.h.i.+rley Clark was there looking the same as she did fifty years ago.



And the returns came in-the Stallone issue of Interview was our biggest seller ever.

Sat.u.r.day,October 19, 1985 I got a cab downtown ($5.50) to meet Vincent who had opened up and his mother who's in town for a visit for two weeks from California and then after she leaves his father's coming. And you can't believe how energetic she is. She says she's my age, but she looks like she could be Vincent's sister. And she does beautiful paintings, really tight, good stuff. She wants to be the new Alice Neel. I guess she saw her on some TV show.

Ran into that artist Bill Katz who raved about the show of Jean Michel and me at Tony Shafrazi's. It was coming down this weekend. Jean Michel was getting all the good press, not me. And Tony's not too happy, I guess he didn't sell many. They were expensive-$40,000 or $50,000. It was too early, I think. I'm hanging on to my p.i.s.s paintings.

Sunday,October 20, 1985 It's the fortieth anniversary of the U.N. and I think Mrs. Marcos is in town. It's getting so scary in the Philippines. Some papers say the Marcoses are buying up everything in the U.S., but that could be not true, the papers can lie. Our government must want them out, though. Like the U.S. must have wanted the Shah to fall. But let's see, did we want to lose in Vietnam? No, but after everything that's in the papers this week, I guess the Kennedys were just too busy having an affair with Marilyn to worry about Vietnam.

Monday,October 21, 1985 I called Keith and he couldn't come down, but he invited us down, he had George Condo, the artist, working there. Bruno's just signed him and it turns out this "poor artist" has a room under Nick Rhodes now at the Ritz Carlton-Bruno bought all of his paintings! Like 300 (cab $5)!

Wednesday,October 23, 1985 We're calling in Europe to try to locate the Mao that Mr. Chow wants, and it's a solid sale if we can find it, but it's one of the paintings Leo loaned out that was never sent back. My deal with Leo now is that if he sells something he gets a commission. But he's never worked to get my prices up. I don't know, I guess Roy and Jasper keep the gallery going. He could've had that show of Jean Michel's and mine, but he didn't want the paintings. Tony Shafrazi was the one who really wanted them.

Thursday, October 24, 1985 Cabbed to the Palladium for Debbie Harry's party ($6) for her song that Jellybean produced, "Feel the Spin." When Debbie arrived, she saw us in the balcony and came up there because she thought it was the place to (laughs) (laughs) be, and then it was the place to be because all the photographers came after be, and then it was the place to be because all the photographers came after her her. She looks great. Debbie actually was the first Madonna.

Friday,October 25, 1985 That receptionist Gael just hired, for the second time when I called she didn't know who I was, and she should be fired immediately (telephone $2, taxis $3, $4).

Sat.u.r.day,October 26, 1985 Keith Haring was having an opening, so cabbed to the gallery (cab $4). Keith said that when they had walked into the gallery earlier he was with his mother and Joey Dietrich-I guess it must have been around noon-and two white kids threw tar and feathers at them and the only one who got hit was Joey. And we were trying to figure out what that meant-tar and feathers. When do you do that and what kind of person would do that? What was the message?

Oh, and the tabloids say that there's a big TV producer who's got AIDS and who could it be? I'm telling you, I don't want to know anybody ever in my life. It's so much better just going to dinner. There's different ways to have fun, different kinds of people to have fun with. I don't need romance.

Monday,October 28, 1985 Puttered around, went over to the West Side (cab $4). Got a free lesson on how to stand on my toes from this lady called Ann Marie who Dr. Li wants me to take lessons from on alignment, $75 a lesson. But I just can't see it. She's fifty-five trying to look thirteen. Like me. It's just paying someone to care about you. Got a cab (cab $5.50, newspapers $2, phone $2).

Went to the office. I was nervous about going down to the book signing at B. Dalton's on 8th Street and Sixth Avenue after what happened to Keith on Sat.u.r.day.

And I'm having a very hard time sending that $10,000 back to Sandy Gallin. I keep losing the address.

Cabbed to B. Dalton's ($5). It wasn't a big, shoving crowd, it was orderly the whole time, a long spaghetti line that lasted for two and a half hours and we sold 150 books, and Craig Nelson from Harper & Row was acting like a star. Chris Makos came by and he was impressed with my popularity. And Christopher was looking at the America America book and saying, "Oh G.o.d, half these pictures were taken in book and saying, "Oh G.o.d, half these pictures were taken in Europe!" (laughs) Europe!" (laughs) And he was so right! And it was so nice to hear him putting down Craig. I enjoyed it. And the book costs $16.95 and there was a 10 percent discount and one girl bought six copies and I had to sign long things for her like, "Dear Harry, I hope you have a good season in the Adirondacks...." And he was so right! And it was so nice to hear him putting down Craig. I enjoyed it. And the book costs $16.95 and there was a 10 percent discount and one girl bought six copies and I had to sign long things for her like, "Dear Harry, I hope you have a good season in the Adirondacks...."

I've been forgetting to say that the new "Disco" installation at Area has me and Diana Vreeland waiting to get into Studio 54. It's funny.

Tuesday,October 29, 1985 I broke something and realized I should break something once a week to remind me how fragile life is. It was a good plastic ring from the twenties. I walked on Madison and it was cold in the shade and warm in the sun. I had on the coat that Marina gave me which I love, the Calvin Klein one with the hood, but the pockets aren't useful. They're so big but the way they're made, everything slips out. Walked all the way down to the office and the sun was so bright in people's eyes that I didn't get recognized a lot. Fred is coming back from L.A.

And Craig Nelson called a few times, I'm hating him so much that I think I'll take Christopher with me to some of the cities I have to do the book tour in just to drive Craig crazy.

I read in "Suzy" about the Kluge party that I missed in Virginia, everyone went to it. I just didn't want to break my rut, but boy I should have-it was every portrait I should ever be doing.

And Paul Morrissey's movie Mixed Blood Mixed Blood is still packing them in, they say. We got the rights to is still packing them in, they say. We got the rights to Trash Trash back from Cinema 5, and it's funny, we have to go someplace and physically pick them up. back from Cinema 5, and it's funny, we have to go someplace and physically pick them up.

And my big Mao painting is still lost somewhere in Europe, they think Nice. It's Leo's fault. And Leo is getting as bad as Huntington Hartford-they say he just says yes to any girl who asks him for anything.

Wednesday,October 30, 1985 I guess I can't put off talking about it any longer.

[NOTE: For days Andy postponed giving the Diary his account of this day. Finally, on November 2, he did.]

Okay, let's get it over with. Wednesday. The day my biggest nightmare came true.

The day started with Benjamin not picking me up (phone $2, magazines $2). I didn't go to the Matsuda fas.h.i.+on show. I'm just going to talk through this quickly because otherwise I can't face it.

n.o.body from the office would go with me to the Rizzoli Bookstore in Soho, but Rupert's old a.s.sistant Bernard had stopped by to visit and he said he would. Rupert dropped us off. The store is long and the signing was on the second floor in the balcony.

I'd been signing America America books for an hour or so when this girl in line handed me hers to sign and then she-did what she did. The Diary can write itself here. books for an hour or so when this girl in line handed me hers to sign and then she-did what she did. The Diary can write itself here.

[She pulled Andy's wig off and threw it over the balcony to a male who ran out of the store with it. Bernard held the female while the store called the police but Andy declined to press charges. The staff at Rizzoli asked him if he'd like to stop, but there were people with books still waiting so he said no, that he would finish. The Calvin Klein coat he was wearing had a hood, so he pulled it up over his head and kept signing.]

I don't know what held me back from pus.h.i.+ng her over the balcony. She was so pretty and well-dressed. I guess I called her a b.i.t.c.h or something and asked how she could do it. But it's okay, I don't care-if a picture gets published, it does. There were so many people with cameras. Maybe it'll be the cover of Details Details, I don't know. If I would've hit the girl or something then I would've been wrong and there would be lawsuits and everything. It's getting violent out there again, like the sixties. I usually stand up at those things but there I was sitting down and people were above me and the setup was all wrong and I was so worn out and hating Craig Nelson and I wasn't fast enough and it just happened so fast and Bernard was really sweet. But you know, you're in this place and everybody's being so nice and you don't think anything will happen. She was really pretty, a nice-looking well-dressed girl. They had her cornered for a while and then they let her go. It was too unusual. I guess these people had gone around telling telling everybody they were going to do it, because a lot of people later said they'd heard things. It was so shocking. It hurt. Physically. And it hurt that n.o.body had warned me. everybody they were going to do it, because a lot of people later said they'd heard things. It was so shocking. It hurt. Physically. And it hurt that n.o.body had warned me.

And I had just gotten another magic crystal which is supposed to protect me and keep things like this from happening. So I was too nerve-racked, it was like in a movie. I signed for one and a half hours more I guess, pretending that it didn't mean anything, and eventually it doesn't. You have to live with it. It was like getting shot again, it wasn't real. I was just the comedian there, pleasing the people. And it was so close to Halloween. Then Bernard dropped me and I gave him $10.

And I got home and had two English m.u.f.fins with margarine which isn't so good, and garlic, and two cups of tea and carrot juice and I tried the Campbell's dry soup. It was good. And no accessories in it.

And then PH called to see what time I was leaving for Was.h.i.+ngton in the morning, but I got off the phone fast, I didn't tell her what happened because I couldn't face it.

She found out, though, I guess, because she called back an hour later and told me she was proud of me and that I was "a great man." And (laughs) that (laughs) that sure was a first. So that's that and now I never have to talk about it again. sure was a first. So that's that and now I never have to talk about it again.

Thursday, October 31, 1985- New York-Was.h.i.+ngton, D.C.-New York Got up at 5 A.M A.M. with my nerves still jumping from the day before. Christopher was picking me up at 7:00. I hadn't fallen asleep until 2 A.M A.M. and I had to get up so early but somehow I pulled myself out of bed. To have to get right up is so horrible without talking to the Diary for an hour or so, just quietly getting used to it. But I did it and the driver Chris had gotten was nice (driver $40).

And we got to LaGuardia and Craig Nelson was standing out there (magazines $8) and we got the shuttle to Was.h.i.+ngton. We were picked up at the airport by a lady who had a small car. She took us to a radio show and this guy was supposed to be the neatest guy in town, and it was the most horrible interview. I was still too upset about the night before and I couldn't think of anything funny, and he wanted to know about the book and I didn't know anything and he said, "I guess you didn't write the book," and I said, "I guess I didn't." It was one of his most difficult interviews. He will remember it.

And on these trips, G.o.d, I hate Craig so much. He's there saying, "Andy and I are both interested in s.e.x." And I'm saying, "Craig, I'm not interested in s.e.x." I mean, Chris is like a piece of heaven compared to Craig. Although (laughs) (laughs) actually they're alike. They just think food food food and what they can take home. Although Craig is fatter. And they're both pigeon-toed. But Christopher is finally paying his dues, coming with me to these things-he's not even taking pictures and getting phone numbers, he's actually working, taking care of me and organizing me. actually they're alike. They just think food food food and what they can take home. Although Craig is fatter. And they're both pigeon-toed. But Christopher is finally paying his dues, coming with me to these things-he's not even taking pictures and getting phone numbers, he's actually working, taking care of me and organizing me.

The lady with the small car drove us to the airport and the plane was late, left at 8:50, and we ran into Susan Mulcahy. She didn't seem to have heard what had happened to me at Rizzoli, she'd been away from work at the Post Post I guess, maybe she hadn't gone in that day, so I didn't know what to do. When you're friends with the person are you supposed to tell them and are they then supposed to not write it or what? I didn't know what you do. So I didn't say anything and she was self-conscious because I'd caught her down there. I guess maybe she was seeing a person that she's having an affair with and she was all feminine and looked so pretty, like she was just through with a hard day of making out. So she wasn't thinking about me, she was worried about herself. I guess, maybe she hadn't gone in that day, so I didn't know what to do. When you're friends with the person are you supposed to tell them and are they then supposed to not write it or what? I didn't know what you do. So I didn't say anything and she was self-conscious because I'd caught her down there. I guess maybe she was seeing a person that she's having an affair with and she was all feminine and looked so pretty, like she was just through with a hard day of making out. So she wasn't thinking about me, she was worried about herself.

And so then Chris and Craig dropped me off, and I knew when I left the cab that they were going to dish me, even though they don't get along. Craig'd been telling people what had happened on Wednesday all day. And I was exhausted and I ate garlic bread and went to bed at 1:00.

Friday,November 1, 1985-New York-Detroit-New York Got up at 5:00, just tortured. Again it was horrible having to wake up and get right up. Christopher picked me up with the same limo service. Craig got out to the airport on his own. Got to the airport around 7:00. Fred's ex-secretary-Vera, the richest girl from Portugal-was there with a group of rich Mexicans going to Acapulco.

Got the tickets and newspapers for Chris ($7). And I looked at the Daily News Daily News and there in Liz Smith's column was the item on what happened to me, and it was nice, she did it in a nice way. And there was a news story about the hot dog man on 33rd and Park who got attacked by a roving band of kids and his money was stolen and his cart overturned. But the next day he was back on his corner because he had to earn a living, even though he had second- and third-degree burns. and there in Liz Smith's column was the item on what happened to me, and it was nice, she did it in a nice way. And there was a news story about the hot dog man on 33rd and Park who got attacked by a roving band of kids and his money was stolen and his cart overturned. But the next day he was back on his corner because he had to earn a living, even though he had second- and third-degree burns.

Got on the plane and went to Detroit. There was a fat girl holding up the America America book to show she was our driver. About 200 pounds. Sweet. And Detroit is all sprawled out. It looks like L.A. And everybody working everyplace is black. We went to the top floor of this hotel, the dining room overlooking Detroit, and had lunch. book to show she was our driver. About 200 pounds. Sweet. And Detroit is all sprawled out. It looks like L.A. And everybody working everyplace is black. We went to the top floor of this hotel, the dining room overlooking Detroit, and had lunch.

I had to go to the bathroom and there was a black guy there so friendly, it seemed like a s.e.x thing, and I left quickly. And then Craig went to the bathroom and didn't come back for twenty-five minutes.

And then we went to the Detroit Museum and book-signed there. And the guy who gave that Detroit wedding we went to in the sixties came! And he had the advertis.e.m.e.nt for it and the old Velvet Underground cover signed by all the Velvets, except, I think, Lou. And my signature's changed so much since those days. I'd signed it with a ballpoint pen and ... the Mick Jaggers I signed with pencil and then after that I always signed with the felt-tips.

Then we went to Bloomington. Sold 400 books and 190 Interviews Interviews. Sold everything. Had to leave at 7:30 to get the 8:30 plane. I think people get in line again and become repeaters. And so on the way to the airport, after a whole day of nothing but signing, the girl who'd been driving the car all day suddenly came up with a stack stack of books that she wanted autographed! It was like a movie scene, really. of books that she wanted autographed! It was like a movie scene, really.

Got on the plane. It was a clear beautiful night when we got into New York.

Sat.u.r.day,November 2, 1985 Everybody's being so (laughs)nice (laughs)nice to me. n.o.body mentions what happened on Wednesday. to me. n.o.body mentions what happened on Wednesday.

Sunday,November 3, 1985 I decided not to go to the office, to just stay in. Stephen Sprouse called and said he'd been in L.A. and that there was a store there called "Andy Warhol's Wigs" and he wanted to know if itwas mine.

Oh, how do you escape this aging factor? My mother was the age I am now, when she came to New York. And at the time I thought she was really old. But then she didn't die until she was eighty. And she had a lot of energy.

Monday,November 4, 1985 Saw Dr. Li and didn't tell her about the horrors of the past week, and she checked me out and pulled on my fingers and said I was perfectly aligned. So after what I went through either I'm very strong or (laughs) she is (laughs) she is. She said my crystal had been invaded. That it was low on energy and that I had to put it in the sun to recharge it. You put the "share" on with your head back. You can't be standing up. You throw your eyes back until you see yellow She's worried about the same things Bernsohn is-liver, kidneys, large intestine And instead of my brother being the invader, I think it was that girl in the bookstore. They'd said my brother was going to invade the crystal soon, and I thought well, maybe, because I'd said things in some interview about my nephew who left the priesthood to marry a Mexican nun and I thought maybe that had made my brother mad. But I think what invaded was the girl.

Li and Bernsohn don't overlap. Dr. Li is better. She could have gone into crystals but she went into kinesiology and she ma.s.sages pressure points and she's a nutritionist.

After work I went in my silver jacket and dark gla.s.ses to the benefit for Sloan-Kettering and when I got there the P.R. guy who had been the one calling to see if I was coming took me aside and said, "There's no card for you, Mr. Warhol." (laughs) (laughs) And this is the guy Brigid swore she called to RSVP. And this is the guy Brigid swore she called to RSVP.

I wound up leaving and actually it was great to leave. But if I hadn't gone in the first place I could've had a nice evening just going to the movies with the kids or something. So that was that.

And Edmund Gaultney went to a real doctor yesterday after going to a homeopathic one for a long time. He's sick, it's scary. I don't know. You know, I wouldn't be surprised if they started putting gays in concentration camps. All the f.a.gs will have to get married so they won't have to go away to camps. It'll be like for a green card.

Wednesday,November 6, 1985-New York-Boston The prices were really low at the Philippa de Menil and Heiner Friedrich auction last night. Thomas Ammann had offered Dagny Corcoran $350,000 for the blue Liz but she thought it would go for $500,000 so she put it in the auction and it didn't sell, the highest it went was $250,000. And the Jasper Johns that should have gone for $2 million went for $700,000.

I don't know why the de Menils and Dagny didn't sell the paintings privately, why they put them at auction. Oh, and Philip Johnson bought the Stamps for $150,000. He was bidding against Thomas Ammann. That should've gone for $500,000, though.

Wednesday,November 13, 1985-New York Benjamin picked me up and we went over to Bernsohn's. And I told him that Dr. Li had said that my crystal and my share had been infiltrated. The difference between a "crystal" and a "share" is that the share is a healing thing, and that's the round crystal that I wear around my neck. The crystal is a protective thing. Preventative. Although it didn't help me in the bookstore with that girl. Or maybe it did. I don't know. I did just keep signing. I didn't panic.

And the girl who did it called the office yesterday. She said she doesn't know why she did it. Maybe she's having a nervous breakdown about it. It'll probably become the biggest thing in her life, you know?

And then we went to 15th Street and Fifth Avenue to meet Paige at the advertising agency that does the Rose's Lime Juice ads. They do the ads with the semi-n.o.bodies, and they say they're really doing well with them. The John Lurie ad they said did even better than the James Mathers one, and this time they wanted a girl. The semi-celebrities get $5,000 and Paige was trying to get it for Tama. I guess it's Tama who's made Paige be desperately looking for boyfriends-that att.i.tude. And Paige is demanding to meet John Lurie-she thinks he's attractive. I guess she'll go after him as if he were an ad.

Then went back to the office. Worked there till 7:30. The Cabbage Patch Doll guy came by.

Thursday, November 14, 1985 Yoko Ono's boyfriend or husband Sam called and said Yoko was having an impromptu dinner for Bob Dylan. I invited Sam Bolton, Fred's secretary, to go with me.

Went home and watched Entertainment Tonight Entertainment Tonight while I got ready. And they had on the thing for Dylan at the Whitney the night before which I hadn't gone to, but after seeing this program I felt like I had. They were asking all these people how Dylan had influenced them. And I didn't know that he's sold thirty million records. Sam picked me up and we went over there (cab $8). while I got ready. And they had on the thing for Dylan at the Whitney the night before which I hadn't gone to, but after seeing this program I felt like I had. They were asking all these people how Dylan had influenced them. And I didn't know that he's sold thirty million records. Sam picked me up and we went over there (cab $8).

And we had to take off our shoes and now I do, but I had a hole in my sock. And we went in and it really was heavy-duty, everyone in a circle. The food was all store-bought-cut-up chicken. And David Bowie was there and I was disappointed, his suit was too modern. Everybody had champagne but n.o.body really drank it. Madonna arrived and she had just seen Paul's movie Mixed Blood because Mixed Blood because that friend of hers is in it. Bobby. She said she was so relieved her husband Sean wasn't with her so she could really have fun. And she felt uncomfortable without her shoes because she didn't have socks-she said she'd feel more comfortable with her top off than her shoes off. that friend of hers is in it. Bobby. She said she was so relieved her husband Sean wasn't with her so she could really have fun. And she felt uncomfortable without her shoes because she didn't have socks-she said she'd feel more comfortable with her top off than her shoes off.

Yoko had Sean bring out a poster for everybody to sign, a donation for someplace, and he looked closely at every signature because he was confused who all the people were.

Friday,November 15, 1985 At 3:00 I went up to Fiorucci because Richard Bernstein was there signing his Megastar Megastar book. Divine was with him, dressed like a man (cab $4). Went back to the office. Worked till I had to meet Keith at Nippon with Grace Jones. Took Sam (cab $5). book. Divine was with him, dressed like a man (cab $4). Went back to the office. Worked till I had to meet Keith at Nippon with Grace Jones. Took Sam (cab $5).

Grace was waiting for her boyfriend Dolph who's changed his name from Hans. He's in town to promote Rocky IV Rocky IV. And Dolph has almost no accent left, and he's lost twenty-five pounds and Grace says that now his thighs don't sound like he's slus.h.i.+ng through water when he's coming toward her. She was so funny, imitating the sound of his legs making the flesh sound. Grace pulled out a big wad of hundreds and was going to pay and then I said that I would (dinner $280).

Monday,November 18, 1985 Oh, and the other day when I was reading in bed Halston dialed my number by mistake and asked for Bianca, so when I recognized his voice I said, "Oh yes, she's right here in bed with me." So that was funny.

Cornelia called and said I should pick her up for the Marty Raynes dinner at "21." Every rich guy was at this dinner and all the right models, every ex-model who'd made it. Married a rich guy. Every guy with a million millions, chic, and in black tie with these beautiful girls. Me, I was a mess. They had caviar by the truckload. I ate everything because I was nervous. Dropped Cornelia off. And just as we were arriving at the Olympic Tower where she's living now, so was Khashoggi, and she had never met him and neither had I. She's a friend of his daughter, Nubila's. And he's a big guy. He doesn't look foreign. Really big. He was nice.

Wednesday,November 20, 1985-Dallas-New York Up at 6:00 after signing 1,200 books the night before. Went to the airport. I was disappointed that n.o.body in Dallas wears cowboy hats anymore. The cowboy look is dead, I guess.

Got back to New York. And Chris is so pushy, he said he had a meeting and he's telling the driver of the limo that I'm I'm paying for that paying for that he's in he's in a big rush, and he tells me I don't mind getting dropped a couple of blocks from my house and walking, do I. And he booted Craig out, he told him, a big rush, and he tells me I don't mind getting dropped a couple of blocks from my house and walking, do I. And he booted Craig out, he told him, (laughs) (laughs) "I'm sorry but you'll have to take a bus or something" (limo $100). "I'm sorry but you'll have to take a bus or something" (limo $100).

Chris, by the way, is fat again. He has a two-inch tire around his middle. Because he's back together with Peter so it's the homemade pumpkin pies and the apple pies.

Thursday, November 21, 1985 Picked up by Benjamin. Walked down Madison. Stopped at the nice chocolate store way in the back of the AT&T building and they gave us some free candy so I hope they make it.

Edmund Gaultney came in and he's put some weight back on and he's looking good again. He's off macrobiotic. Peter Wise is cooking food for him.

And then the Sacklers were doing this thing at the Metropolitan Club and I was figuring out who to bring, and I should have brought Dr. Li, I guess, because I wound up sitting with Dr. Linus Pauling, but I brought Paige and she had a really good time. Dr. Karen Burke would've been all over every man and the wives would've gotten mad at her. There's n.o.body to go after portraits for me, though. We're still missing a Bob Colacello.

So cabbed to the Metropolitan Club ($5). And there's Paige sitting downstairs in the hallway. Those horrible doormen there wouldn't let her in because she didn't have a fur coat! And we ran into Richard Johnson who works at the Post and he said that Susan Mulcahy just quit. He would be a good eligible person to invite on our blind-date nights.

And Dr. Pauling took my arm, he was getting an award. Upstairs I was next to Jill Sadder, across from Martha Graham, and Jill said, "Martha's been dying to meet Linus Pauling for years and now she's next to him and doesn't know it."

I met a man who said he invented vitamin B or C.

And Dr. Pauling was telling us that the only real killer is sugar, and then Paige and I were dumbfounded later when they brought dessert and he sat there eating all these cookies. Paige dropped me off.

Sunday,November 24, 1985 Jean Michel hasn't called me in a month, so I guess it's really over. He went to Hawaii and j.a.pan, but now he's just in L.A. so you'd think he'd call. But maybe he's getting tight, maybe he's not throwing money around the way he used to. I heard he locked the door to his bedroom when he left so Shenge can't get in, and he didn't leave him any money, either. Can you imagine being married to Jean Michel? You'd be on pins and needles your whole life.

Then Philip Johnson had gone to Dallas and David Whitney was having a dinner for Michael Heizer and me at Odeon (cab $8). David was having his first of about seven martinis and a beer. And he was talking again about "when Pops pops off." But David will probably pop off before Pops. He wears the same gla.s.ses that Philip does, now. He looks like Philip did twenty years ago when I first met him. And David did Mike Heizer's show at the Whitney, and he did my show, and next he's doing Eric Fischl's, who's the hot new top artist, I guess.

Wednesday,November 27, 1985 I ran into the model I fixed Paige up with and gee, he's so good-looking. Paige said that he was just an airhead, but here is this beautiful boy with muscles and a chest and perfect teeth and from New Jersey and you could mold him into anything, get him started reading or anything.

Thursday, November 28, 1985 Victor called and said that Halston was inviting me for Thanksgiving dinner, and that he had a possible portrait coming. And I called Paige and she picked me up and we went over to Halston's and Jane Holzer was there and Bianca was looking soulful on her crutches, I told her about Dr. Li because she's going to a homeopathic thing and they can be dangerous if it's not the right one. And then this lady was there and she said she had a check in her bag for $999 million to give to Revlon. She said she'd been meeting with lawyers all day and we said how could you get them on Thanksgiving, and she said, "Money talks."

Halston always has the best mince pie with a circle in the center-I don't know where he gets it. n.o.body ever eats it, and he's the one who likes it but he doesn't eat it, either. Then Paige walked me home and I watched TV.

Sat.u.r.day,November 30, 1985 Got up and went down to the kitchen and ate the turkey that Nena and Aurora had cooked. I was going to call Dr. Karen but I couldn't face being tortured with collagen needles. I didn't even call to wish her a Happy Thanksgiving.

So I'm at the office and the phone rings and it's Geri Miller calling from the women's shelter and she goes back and forth from "You sc.u.mbag!" to being sweet. And she's screaming in the background calling some policeman "You n.i.g.g.e.r!" and I could hear him getting mad and then later she's screaming at this social worker, "You black lesbian n.i.g.g.e.r, get away from me!" And she's saying that Mario Cuomo is her father-the other day she called and said Muhammad Ali was-and then she knows everything-like she knew the cover I did of Cuomo for Manhattan Manhattan, inc. magazine. And she's saying, "He has a birthmark there and I have a birthmark there, so he's my father!" It's like talking to Crazy Matty. And they both have all this energy. She said, "When you saw me on the street I was working in real estate for Alice Mason." That's exactly exactly what she said. And I have a funny feeling she's a young senile person. After seeing these what she said. And I have a funny feeling she's a young senile person. After seeing these Donahue Donahue shows. Because she says they say it's schizophrenia, but I don't think so. A Jewish girl who came from New Jersey-in her shows. Because she says they say it's schizophrenia, but I don't think so. A Jewish girl who came from New Jersey-in her Trash days Trash days she was our most sensible superstar-then in the seventies she suddenly got crazy. One day she was very down to earth, worrying about her topless dancing career, and then the next week she showed up barefoot at 860, saying that the Mafia gave her LSD because she knew too much! From working in all those topless bars they own on 45th Street, I guess. she was our most sensible superstar-then in the seventies she suddenly got crazy. One day she was very down to earth, worrying about her topless dancing career, and then the next week she showed up barefoot at 860, saying that the Mafia gave her LSD because she knew too much! From working in all those topless bars they own on 45th Street, I guess.

And so she's calling from shelters and the odd thing is, she remembers all these details of things that happened to her way in the past. Like she brought up when she had s.e.x with Eric de Rothschild in the sixties and she said that after they had s.e.x he called up Jane Holzer to go for a walk in the park, and she said, "Why did he have to call up Jane Holzer-why didn't he take me me for a walk?" I mean, every for a walk?" I mean, every detail detail. Does that mean nothing's happened in her life since then?

Oh, and more sixties updates: My sixty-year-old cousin called and she was in town with her son and said they wanted to come and see the office, so they came down. And her son is the one who knew Ondine in Pittsburgh. He once took the film courses that Ondine was (laughs) (laughs) giving there, and he told me that Ondine is now selling hot dogs at Madison Square Garden. I'm serious. You know, Ondine "rented" all those films from us and then never returned them. giving there, and he told me that Ondine is now selling hot dogs at Madison Square Garden. I'm serious. You know, Ondine "rented" all those films from us and then never returned them. Loves of Ondine, Chelsea Girls Loves of Ondine, Chelsea Girls. And there was a story about Gerard Malanga in New York New York, about him being the new archivist for the Parks Department and for some reason Vincent was upset that Gerard was saying he was thirty-eight. I took a picture of Gerard the other week, though, and he does look great. But how old is he really? About forty-two or forty-three? And oh, G.o.d, on my Blue Cross I just scribble and make it up all the time and then I get these things that say my birthday is August 28, 1982, so if I have an accident I probably won't get (laughs) (laughs) my money. my money.

I'm starting to think that crystals don't work. Because look what's happened lately when they're supposed to be protecting protecting me-my rug has cancer from the moths, I stepped on a beautiful old plastic ring and crushed it, and I was a.s.saulted at the book signing. But I've got to believe in something, so I'll continue with the crystals. Because things could always be worse. me-my rug has cancer from the moths, I stepped on a beautiful old plastic ring and crushed it, and I was a.s.saulted at the book signing. But I've got to believe in something, so I'll continue with the crystals. Because things could always be worse.

Sunday,December 1, 1985 It was rainy out and I sort of wanted to just sleep in. The dogs went away with Jed. I thought about the moths in my rug and I puttered around.

Went to meet Wilfredo, Bernard, and PH at the Matt Dillon play, Boys of Winter (cab $4). And the play, I mean, after Apocalypse Now, what can you do? If it'd come out eight years ago it would've been a smash hit. Everybody got killed, and it was so sad, but the ending was just too corny, because the guy would never have killed his friend like that. And it's the gayest play on Broadway. One of the reviews should say that and then maybe it would be a hit. Because it's all men caring about each other.

It was raining out and we walked toward Eighth Avenue. Got a limousine that was going by ($20). So we went to the Hard Rock and Matt was already there. He introduced me to his mother, and remember I said the last time I saw him he gave me a pat on the shoulder and a kiss? Well last night he just gave me a pat on the shoulder. Maybe because it was in front of his mother. But then I started thinking that when he saw me the last time he was probably rehearsing for this play and he wanted to see how it felt to kiss a fairy in public.

Sat with Linda Stein and she talked about trying to sell Stallone a house. He called her from his plane and said, "Linda? Sly. Just one thing before we talk at length later: If Elvis were alive today, would he live in an apartment or a house!" And I'm trying to decide if I should try to sell him my house for $5 million. She says she'll have to see it first. The house next door only went for $1.9, but who knows what she could get?

Bernard went and got lost, talking to Susan Dey at the bar. He's a would-be starf.u.c.ker. Susan Dey was emotional about the play and said she was protesting war now. I don't know which war. Nicaragua, I guess.

We left and the rain had turned into a sparkling mist. And we pa.s.sed a guy in a camouflage jacket going toward the Hard Rock and PH yelled, "Harry Dean!" because she thought it looked like Harry Dean Stanton and it was, so we talked for a minute. I always thought he was this teenager who just looked really bad because he'd taken a lot of drugs, but it turns out he's not a teenager-he's almost sixty, so gee, he looks good! good! Then Bernard and Wilfredo dropped me and I gave them a twenty because that's all I had. Then Bernard and Wilfredo dropped me and I gave them a twenty because that's all I had.

And then at work that afternoon I'd spilled some tea on a stack of Polaroids of some portrait and then I couldn't unstick them, they were all stuck together. With all those signs I'd put up all over, like "Do Not Carry Water Into the Print Room" and I wound up doing it.

Tuesday, December 3, 1985- New York-Richmond, Virginia We had to go down because the Lewises gave a wing to the museum down in Richmond. Fred and I went out to Butler Aviation and I expected a few people on a private plane, but it was about 100 people. And it was everybody from the past I really wanted to see, right? The creepiest feeling. I said to Fred, "I want to go home." And Corice Arman said the same thing when she saw all the people. Like seeing Mr. and Mrs. Philip Pearlstein just brought me back to '49, when I first came to New York on the bus with the Pearlsteins. Durangelo who does those highway paintings was there. And Michael Graves. And Venturi appeared in Virginia, but I don't know if he'd come down on this plane. Tom Wolfe was there with his wife.

Lucas Samaras was on the plane, and he was the only one I felt like talking to. I always think these kids are rich now, but he said he still lives in the same old place. He was putting Schnabel down. And I told him he was the Schnabel of twenty years ago. You know how Schnabel won't shake somebody's hand when they put it out, and then a minute later somebody else will come along who's better and then he will? Arne Glimcher was there, he's producing a Robert Redford movie about the art world.

The Andy Warhol Diaries Part 54

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