The Magistrate Part 48

MR. POSKET.

But I am anxious! Tell Sergeant Lugg to look over the Accident-Book, this morning's Hospital Returns, List of Missing Children, Suspicious Pledges People left Chargeable to the Parish, Attend to your Window Fastenings----! I--I--Wormington, Mrs. Posket and I disagreed last night.

MR. WORMINGTON.

Don't think of it, sir! you should hear me and Mrs. Wormington! Pray do come into Court.

MR. POSKET.

Court! I'm totally unfit for business! totally unfit for business!

[_MR. WORMINGTON hurries him off through the curtains. LUGG enters, almost breathless._

LUGG.

We've got charge one in the Dock--all four of 'em. [_Seeing WYKE._]

Hallo! you back again!

WYKE.

Yes--seems so. [_They stand facing each other, dabbing their foreheads with their handkerchiefs._] Phew! you seem warm.

LUGG.

Phew! you don't seem so cool.

WYKE.

I've been lookin' after two ladies.

LUGG.

So have I.

WYKE.

I haven't found 'em.

LUGG.

If I'd known, I'd a been pleased to lend you our two.

[_From the other side of the curtains there is the sound of a shriek from AGATHA POSKET and CHARLOTTE._

WYKE.

Lor'! what's that!

LUGG.

That _is_ our two. Don't notice them--they're hystericals. They're mild now to what they have been. I say, old fellow--is your guv'nor all right in his head?

WYKE.

I suppose so--why?

LUGG.

I've a partickler reason for asking. Does he ever tell you to buy him anything and keep the change?

WYKE.

What d'yer mean?

LUGG.

Well, does he ever come down handsome for your extry exertion--do you ever get any tips?

WYKE.

Rather. What do you think he made me a present of last night?

LUGG.

Don't know.

WYKE.

Twopence--to buy a new umbrella.

LUGG.

Well, I'm blessed! And he gave me the same sum to get him a silk necktie. It's my opinion he's got a softening of the brain. [_Another shriek from the two women, a cry from MR. POSKET, and then a hubbub are heard. Running up to the curtains and looking through._] Hallo!

what's wrong? Here! I told you so--he's broken out, he's broken out.

WYKE.

Who's broken out?

LUGG.

The lunatic. Keep back, I'm wanted.

[_He goes through the curtains._

WYKE.

[_Looking after him._] Look at the guv'nor waving his arms and going on anyhow at the prisoners! Prisoners! Gracious goodness--it's the missis!