The Twa Miss Dawsons Part 1
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The Twa Miss Dawsons.
by Margaret Murray Robertson.
CHAPTER ONE.
"AULD MISS JEAN."
Saughleas was not a large estate, nor were the Dawsons gentlefolks, in the sense generally accepted in the countryside.
It was acknowledged that both the mother and the wife of the new laird had had good blood in their veins; but George Dawson himself, had been, and, in a sense, still was, a merchant in the High-street of Portie. He was banker and s.h.i.+p-owner as well, and valued the reputation which he had acquired as a business man, far more than he would ever be likely to value any honour paid to him as the Laird of Saughleas.
He had gotten his land honestly, as he had gotten all else that he possessed. He had taken no advantage of the necessities of the last owner, who had been in his power, in a certain sense, but had paid him the full value of the place; and not a landed proprietor among them all had more pride in the name and fame of his ancestry, than he had in the feet that he had been the maker of his own fortune, and that no man, speaking truth, could accuse him, in the making of it, of doing a single mean or dishonest deed.
His mother "had come o' gentle bluid," but his father had been first a common sailor and then the mate of a whaling s.h.i.+p that sailed many a time from the little Scottish east coast harbour of Portie, and which at last sailed away never more to return.
His widow lived through years of heart-sickness that must have killed her sooner than it did, but that her two fatherless bairns needed her care. They were but bairns when she died, with no one to look after them but a neighbour who had been always kind to them. The usual lot awaited them, it was thought. The laddie must take to the sea, as most of the laddies in Portie did, and the la.s.sie must get "bit and sup" here and there among the neighbours, till she should be able to do for herself as a servant in some house in the town.
But it happened quite otherwise. Whatever the Dawsons had been in old times, there was good stuff in them now, it was said. For "Wee Jean Dawson," as she was called, with few words spoken, made it clear that she was to make her own way in the world. She was barely fifteen at that time, and her brother was two years younger, and if she had told her plans and wishes, she would have been laughed at, and possibly effectually hindered from trying to carry them out. But she said nothing.
The rent of the two rooms which the children and their mother had occupied, was paid to the end of the year, and the little stock of pins and needles, and small wares generally, by the sale of which the mother had helped out the "white seam," her chief dependence, was not exhausted, and Jean, declining the invitation of their neighbour to take up their abode with her in the mean time, quietly declared her intention of "biding where she was for a while," and no one had the right to say her nay. Before the time to pay another quarter's rent came round, it was ready, and Jean had proved her right to make her own plans, having shown herself capable of carrying them out when they were made.
How she managed, the neighbours could not tell, and they watched her with doubtful wonder. But it was not so surprising as it seemed to them. She was doing little more than she had been doing during the last two years of her mother's life under her mother's guidance. She had bought and sold, she had toiled late and early at the white seam, when her mother was past doing much, and had made herself busy with various trifles in cotton and wool, with crochet-needle and knitting-pins, when white seam failed them, and that was just what she was doing now.
And she went on bravely. She accepted offered favours gratefully, but sooner or later, she always repaid them. If Bell Ray, the fishwife, left a fresh haddock at the door as she pa.s.sed, she was sure to carry with her some other day a pair of little socks, or a plaything for the bairnie at home. And if Mrs Sims, next door, kindly took the heaviest part of the girl's was.h.i.+ng into her hands, she got in return her Sunday "mutch" starched and ironed and its broad borders set up in a way that excited the admiring wonder of all.
The two rooms were models of neatness as they had always been. George was comfortably clothed, at least he was never ragged, he very rarely went hungry, and he went to the school as regularly, and to as good purpose, as the banker's son, or the minister's son, and was as obedient to Jean as he had been to his mother in the old days. Jean was neat, and more than neat in her black print frock and holland ap.r.o.n--it cannot be said of the first half year that she was never hungry. For many a time the portion set aside for the dinner of two was only enough for one, and it cost Jean less pain to go without her share than to let the growing laddie be stinted of his needed food. But after the first half year, they had enough, and some to spare to those who had less, and much as Jean sometimes needed money to add to her stock in trade, she had been too wisely taught by her mother, not to know that a sufficient quant.i.ty of simple and wholesome food was absolutely necessary for health of body and of mind, and therefore necessary for success in life.
Of course she was successful. In after years, when she used to go back to this time in her thoughts and in her talk, she attributed her success in business, chiefly to two things--her silence, and her determination never to fall into debt. To the talk which "neebour folk" fell into in her little shop, she listened, but she rarely added her word; and she so ordered matters that it never became, as it very easily might have been, a centre of gossip and a cause of trouble in the neighbourhood. As to falling into debt, her determination against it hindered her for a while; but when the "big" merchants of Portie came to know her and her ways, they gave her the benefit of the lowest prices in sales, so trifling to them, but so important to her. They helped her with advice, and put some advantages as to fas.h.i.+ons and fabrics in her way; and best of all, when Geordie's schooling was supposed to be at an end, one of them took him into his employment in a humble capacity indeed, but his rise to the place of honour behind the counter, and then to the book-keeper's desk, was more rapid than generally happens in such a case as his.
Before Jean was seven and twenty years of age, she and her brother were equal partners in a fairly prosperous business established by her in the High-street. After this fortune was secure in the course of time.
They were equal partners for a good many years, but gradually, as their resources increased, and new ways of employing energy and capital were open to the brother, this was changed. With her usual prudence, Jean refused to engage in risks which she had not sufficient knowledge to guide or strength to control, and a change was made in their business relations, and each continued to prosper in the chosen way.
As time went on, Jean ruled well her brother's home and helped him in many ways; but she did not, as had been predicted of her, grow into a mere hard business woman--seeing nothing so clearly as the main chance, and loving money itself better than the comfort that money may bring.
It was they who knew her least, or who knew her only in her capacity of business woman, who feared this for her. The people who had watched and wondered at her early efforts and success, the neighbours, and the fisher wives who had exchanged kindly gifts with her in these days, did not fear it, nor the "puir bodies" in the back streets and lanes of Portie, who enjoyed the pickles o' tea and snuff, and the bits of flannel that found their way to them from her hands, nor the mothers of fatherless bairns who "won through sair straits," and got the better in many a "sair fecht" with poverty and trouble by her help.
Her silence and reserve, even to her friends--and she had many--looked to those who were not specially her friends, like the coldness and hardness that strengthens with the years. It was by deeds rather than words that her strong and tender nature found expression, and those who needed her help most, knew her best and trusted her most fully, and even in the busiest time of her life, she saw enough of other people's cares and sorrows, to remind her that there was something more needed in life than money, or the good things that money could bring.
And, when she ought to have been past "the like o' that," as she said to herself, for she was not far from thirty, the wonderful gift of love was given to her. And then, through her love, came the gift which G.o.d is sure, sooner or later, to give to His own,--the gift of sanctified trouble.
There came to Portie in one of the s.h.i.+ps in which her brother had an interest, a lad--he looked scarcely more than a lad--sick with fever.
Accident brought him to George Dawson's house for a night, and in the morning he was too ill to leave it. Through long weeks of suffering and delirium, Jean nursed him, and cared for him, and saved him from death.
He was not a good young man. The wild words uttered in his wanderings, proved this to Jean, only too clearly, and if he had gone away as soon as he rose from his bed, he would have taken her interest and her good will with him, and nothing more. But his convalescence was long and tedious, and whatever his sins against himself and others might have been, he was of a sweet and kindly nature, and a handsome and manly lad withal.
And of course it was the fairest side of his character that he showed to Jean in these days. Not that he tried to hide his past follies and even his sins from her. But it was his sorrow for them that he showed her, and his longing to live a better life by her help; and what with his penitence and his gentleness and his winning English ways, he wiled the heart out of her breast before she was aware. And the love was mutual.
But whether he ever could have given to her all that she gave to him, was doubtful to the only one who knew what had befallen her.
To say that her brother was amazed at her love for a man so much younger and mentally and morally so much beneath her, is to say little. He was utterly dismayed. But he knew her strong and steadfast nature too well to try to move her from her purpose. He only stipulated that there should be time given to prove the young man's love, and to prove also the firmness of his determination to live a new life. It was not a severe test that he insisted on. One voyage the young man was to make, and coming home with the good word of his captain and s.h.i.+pmates, no difficulty should be put in the way of the marriage, strange as he confessed the idea of such a marriage to be. It was to be a six months'
voyage only, and though Jean did not feel that such a sacrifice need be made, she was yet willing to make it at the will of the brother whom she loved. And so they parted.
But six months pa.s.sed, and then six more, and when three more had worn away tidings came. Through these months of waiting Jean went in silence, and when the captain's son came home--the only survivor of the crew of the s.h.i.+p that had carried her heart and her hope away--and told the story of their wreck on wintry seas, no one knew that she listened and suffered as no widow of them all suffered for her cruel and utter loss.
Her lover's name was spoken with the rest, and it was told how brave he had been and kindly, and how he had kept up the courage of the rest and cheered them all to the last, and how the hardest and most careless of the crew had planned together to beguile him into taking more than his share of the food they had, because he was not strong like the rest, and because they loved him. And Jean listened to it all, and never uttered a word. Nor afterward did she open her lips even to her brother. He tried to speak to her some vague words of comfort, as to its being G.o.d's will, and all for the best, but she only put forth her hand to bid him cease, and when he still would fain have spoken a word of his own sorrow for her trouble she rose and went away, and it was many years before either of them returned to the sorrow of that time. She lived through her trouble, and she did not grow hard or bitter under it, as she might have done if he had lived and forgotten her; and comfort came to her as the years went on.
It came to her in a strange way, her brother thought, and though he was glad of its coming, it cost him some pain. The first, indeed the only, danger of estrangement that ever came between the brother and sister grew out of this. Not that there was any real danger even then; for Jean was, in her silent and determined way, so soft and gentle and unprovokable in the new manner of thought and life into which she fell at this time, that though her brother was both angry and ashamed, and suffered both shame and anger to appear to her and to others, it made no real breach between them.
And he had cause for neither shame nor anger. It was only that weary of herself and the drowsy ministrations of the parish kirk, Jean had strayed one stormy Sabbath night into "a little kirkie" lately built in a back street by "a queer kin' o' folk ca'ed missioners," and had there heard words such as she had never heard before, and had found in them more than comfort.
Not that the words were altogether new, nor the thoughts,--they were in her Bible, every one of them--she told her brother afterwards; but, for one thing, they were earnestly spoken by one who believed them, and then they came to one ready for them and waiting, though she knew it not.
Ah! well, that does not explain it altogether. It was the Lord Himself who spoke to her by the voice of His servant revealing Himself to her, through His own familiar Word in a new way. After that she could say of Him, "Whose I am and whom I serve," and her life took a new meaning. It was His who "had bought her with a price." All that she had done hitherto for pity's sake, she did now _for His sake_. "To one of the least of these," He had said. The world was full of "these little ones"
of His, and there were some of them in Portie even, and henceforth they were to be her care.
Her outward life did not change much however. Except that at first she "whiles" went to "the little kirkie," and afterwards went there altogether, there was no difference that could be named by her little world generally. Her brother saw a difference, and so did the poor folk who shared her care and kindness. Her eye was brighter and her step lighter, and the look of suffering she had lately worn was giving place to a look of patient even cheerful peacefulness that was good to see.
She had more words, too, at her command. Not for her brother--at least not for him at first. But the impulse which her new love for her Master had given her, was strong enough to overcome the silence natural to her, and "good words" gently and yet strongly spoken went with her gifts now, and sometimes they were received as gladly as her gifts. But that she should cast in her lot with the handful of "newfangled folk" in Stott's Lane was a pain and a humiliation to her brother which it took years to outlive.
Their outward life went on as it had done before for a good while, and then her brother married. His wife was of a family which had had a name and a place in the countryside for generations; but George Dawson found her earning her bread as a teacher in a school in Aberdeen, and married her "for pure love," Portie folk said; and some who had known him best, expected no such thing of George Dawson.
It was doubtful whether his love for her or his pride in her was strongest. He did not take her to the house above the shop where he and his sister had lived so long, but to a fine house at the head of the High-street in a far pleasanter part of the town, and there they began their married life together. Jean did not go with them, though they both wished it. It was better for them to be alone, she said, and as well for her. So she staid still in the house above the shop, making a home for the young men employed in the business, keeping a wise and watchful eye on them and on the business also. After a few years, when her sister-in-law became delicate, and there were little children needing her care, she, with greater self-denial than any guessed, gave up her independent life and went home to them for a while, and lightened the mother's care for them and for the home as well, and found her reward in knowing that her work was not vain.
But when more years had pa.s.sed, and her brother, a richer man than she knew, bought the small estate of Saughleas, and took his family there, she did not go with them. She was getting on in years, she was too old to begin a new life in new circ.u.mstances, and the bairns were getting beyond the need of her care. So she went to a home of her own that looked out upon the sea, and set herself with wisdom and patience and loving kindness to the work which her Master had given her to do.
CHAPTER TWO.
THE BROTHER'S SORROW.
George Dawson had been very successful in life. He was not an old man when he took possession of his estate of Saughleas. He had many years before him in which to enjoy the fruit of his labours, he told himself, and he exulted in the thought.
What happy years the first years there were! His children were good and bonny and strong; his wife was--not very strong--but oh! so sweet and dear! What lady among them all could compare with her, so good and true, so fair and stately, and yet so kindly and so well-beloved?
"I will grow a better man to deserve her better," he said to himself with a vague presentiment of change upon him--a fear that such happiness could not last. For who was he, that he should have so much more than other men had? So he walked softly, and did justly, and dealt mercifully in many a case where he might have been severe with justice on his side, and strove honestly and wisely to make himself worthy of the woman who had been growing dearer day by day.
Growing dearer? Yes--but who was slipping away from him, slowly, but surely, day by day. He strove to shut his eyes to that which others clearly saw, but deep down in his heart was the certain knowledge that he must lose her. But not yet. Not for a long time yet. With care in a warmer climate, under sunnier skies, she might live for years yet-- many years. So he set himself to the task of so arranging his affairs, that he might take her away for the winter at least, away from the bleak sea winds to one of the many places where he had heard that health and healing had come to many a one far more ill than she was.
And if he could have got her away in time, who knows but so it might have been. But illness came in amongst the children, and she would not leave them even to the wise and loving care of their aunt; and when first one, and then another little life went out, her husband could see with a sinking heart, that she longed to follow where they had gone.
When the other children grew better he took her away for a little while.
But the drawing of those little graves, and the longing to die at home among those who were still left, brought them back to Saughleas--only just in time. He did not lay her in the bleak kirkyard of Portie. He _could_ not do it. It was a foolish thing to do, it was said, but in the quietest, bonniest spot in Saughleas, in a little wood that lay in sight of the house, he laid her down, when he could keep her no longer, and by and by he lifted her bonny little bairns and laid them down beside her. And then it seemed for a while that to him life was ended.
But life was not ended. He had more to do, and more to suffer yet, and indeed had to become a changed man altogether before he could be ready and worthy to look again upon the face that he so longed to see.
Oh, the length of the days! the weariness of all things! He used to wonder at the sickness that lay heavy on his heart all day--at the anguish that made the night terrible to him. He was growing an old man, he said to himself, and he had thought it was only the young who strove and suffered, and could not yield themselves to the misery of loss and pain. But then--who, old or young, of all the men he had ever known, had lost what he had lost? No wonder that he suffered and could find no comfort.
"Ay! No wonder that you suffer," said his sister to him once. "But take tent lest ye add rebellion to the sin of overmuch sorrow. Have you ever truly submitted to G.o.d's will all your life, think ye, George, man?
Things had mostly gone well and easily with ye. But now this has come upon you, and take ye thought of it. For ye're no' out of G.o.d's hand yet, and 'whom He loveth He chasteneth.'"
She did not speak often to him, but he heard her and made no answer.
The Twa Miss Dawsons Part 1
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