Mr. Sponge's Sporting Tour Part 73
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'Well, never mind about that,' replied Mr. Sponge; 'let us go on after these birds.'
'Oh, we'll (puff) up to them presently,' observed Jog, labouring away, with half a ton of clay at each foot, the sun having dispelled the frost where it struck, and made the land carry.
'_Presently!_' retorted Mr. Sponge. 'But you should make haste, man.'
'Well, but let me go my own (puff) pace,' snapped Jog, labouring away.
'Pace!' exclaimed Mr. Sponge, 'your own crawl, you should say.'
'Indeed!' growled Jog, with an angry snort.
They now got through a well-established cattle-gap into a very rushy, squashy, gorse-grown pasture, at the bottom of the rising ground on which Mr. Sponge had marked the birds. Ponto, whose energetic exertions had been gradually relaxing, until he had settled down to a leisurely hunting-dog, suddenly stood transfixed, with the right foot up, and his gaze settled on a rushy tuft.
'P-o-o-n-to!' e.j.a.c.u.l.a.t.ed Jog, expecting every minute to see him dash at it.
'P-o-o-n-to!' repeated he, raising his hand.
Mr. Sponge stood on the tip-toe of expectation; Jog raised his wide-awake hat from his eyes and advanced cautiously with the engine of destruction c.o.c.ked. Up started a great hare; bang! went the gun, with the hare none the worse. Bang! went the other barrel, which the hare acknowledged by two or three stotting bounds and an increase of pace.
'Well missed!' exclaimed Mr. Sponge.
Away went Ponto in pursuit.
'P-o-o-n-to!' shrieked Jog, stamping with rage.
'I could have wiped your nose,' exclaimed Mr. Sponge, covering the hare with a hedge-stake placed to his shoulder like a gun.
'Could you?' growled Jog; "spose you wipe your own,' added he, not understanding the meaning of the term.
Meanwhile, old Ponto went rolling away most energetically, the farther he went the farther he was left behind, till the hare having scuttled out of sight, he wheeled about and came leisurely back, as if he was doing all right.
Jog was very wroth, and vented his anger on the dog, which, he declared, had caused him to miss, vowing, as he rammed away at the charge, that he never missed such a shot before. Mr. Sponge stood eyeing him with a look of incredulity, thinking that a man who could miss such a shot could miss anything. They were now all ready for a fresh start, and Ponto, having pocketed his objurgation, dashed forward again up the rising ground over which the covey had dropped.
Jog's thick wind was a serious impediment to the expeditious mounting of the hill, and the dog seemed aware of his infirmity, and to take pleasure in aggravating him.
'P-o-o-n-to!' gasped Jog, as he slipped, and scrambled, and toiled, sorely impeded by the enc.u.mbrance of his gun.
But P-o-o-n-to heeded him not. He knew his master couldn't catch him, and if he did, that he durstn't flog him.
'P-o-o-n-to!' gasped Jog again, still louder, catching at a bush to prevent his slipping back. 'T-o-o-h-o-o! P-o-o-n-to!' wheezed he; but the dog just rolled his great stern, and bustled about more actively than ever.
'Hang ye! but I'd cut you in two if I had you!' exclaimed Mr. Sponge, eyeing his independent proceedings.
'He's not a bad (puff) dog,' observed Jog, mopping the perspiration from his brow.
'He's not a good 'un,' retorted Mr. Sponge.
'D'ye think not (wheeze)?' asked Jog.
'Sure of it,' replied Sponge.
'Serves me,' growled Jog, labouring up the hill.
'Easy served,' replied Mr. Sponge, whistling, and eyeing the independent animal.
'T-o-o-h-o-o! P-o-o-n-t-o!' gasped Jog, as he dashed forward on reaching level ground more eagerly than ever.
'P-o-o-n-to! T-o-o-h-o-o!' repeated he, in a still louder tone, with the same success.
'You'd better get up to him,' observed Mr. Sponge, 'or he'll spring all the birds.'
Jog, however, blundered on at his own pace, growling:
'Most (puff) haste, least (wheeze) speed.'
The dog was now fast drawing upon where the birds lit; and Mr. Sponge and Jog having reached the top of the hill, Mr. Sponge stood still to watch the result.
Up whirred four birds out of a patch of gorse behind the dog, all presenting most beautiful shots. Jog blazed a barrel at them without touching a feather, and the report of the gun immediately raised three brace more into the thick of which he fired with similar success. They all skimmed away unhurt.
'Well missed!' exclaimed Mr. Sponge again. 'You're what they call a good shooter but a bad hitter.'
'You're what they call a (wheeze) fellow,' growled Jog.
He meant to say 'saucy,' but the word wouldn't rise. He then commenced reloading his gun, and lecturing P-o-o-n-to, who still continued his exertions, and inwardly anathematizing Mr. Sponge. He wished he had left him at home. Then recollecting Mrs. Jog, he thought perhaps he was as well where he was. Still his presence made him shoot worse than usual, and there was no occasion for that.
'Let _me_ have a shot now,' said Mr. Sponge.
'Shot (puff)--shot (wheeze); well, take a shot if you choose,' replied he.
Just as Mr. Sponge got the gun, up rose the eleventh bird, and he knocked it over.
[Ill.u.s.tration: MR. SPONGE GIVES PONTO A LESSON]
'_That's_ the way to do it!' exclaimed Mr. Sponge, as the bird fell dead before Ponto.
The excited dog, unused to such descents, s.n.a.t.c.hed it up and ran off. Just as he was getting out of shot, Mr. Sponge fired the other barrel at him, causing him to drop the bird and run yelping and howling away. Jog was furious. He stamped, and gasped, and fumed, and wheezed, and seemed like to burst with anger and indignation. Though the dog ran away as hard as he could lick, Jog insisted that he was mortally wounded, and would die. 'He never saw so (wheeze) a thing done. He wouldn't have taken twenty pounds for the dog. No, he wouldn't have taken thirty. Forty wouldn't have bought him. He was worth fifty of anybody's money,' and so he went on, fuming and advancing his value as he spoke.
Mr. Sponge stole away to where the dog had dropped the bird; and Mr. Jog, availing himself of his absence, retraced his steps down the hill, and struck off home at a much faster pace than he came. Arrived there, he found the dog in the kitchen, somewhat sore from the visitation of the shot, but not sufficiently injured to prevent his enjoying a most liberal plate of stick-jaw pudding supplied by a general contribution of the servants. Jog's wrath was then turned in another direction, and he blew up for the waste and extravagance of the act, hinting pretty freely that he knew who it was that had set them against it. Altogether he was full of troubles, vexations, and annoyances; and after spending another most disagreeable evening with our friend Sponge, went to bed more determined than ever to get rid of him.
CHAPTER LVI
NONSUCH HOUSE AGAIN
Poor Jog again varied his hints the next morning. After sundry prefatory 'Murry Anns!' and 'Bar-tho-lo-_mews_!' he at length got the latter to answer, when, raising his voice so as to fill the whole house, he desired him to go to the stable, and let Mr. Sponge's man know his master would be (wheezing) away.
Mr. Sponge's Sporting Tour Part 73
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Mr. Sponge's Sporting Tour Part 73 summary
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