Uprising: A Collide Novel Part 8

"We didn't lose anyone. Everyone made it. We're alive."

Best Laid Plans

Chapter 4.

I feel Merrick laying me down in our pallet. I still refuse to open my eyes. Carefully, he s.h.i.+fts me and is so gentle with my leg. He thought I was asleep while they were talking out there. I might as well have been, I couldn't open my eyes and face them. The shame is still too raw. My body just shut itself down and refused to let me partic.i.p.ate.

This wonderful group of people who would never blame me or Cain even when we so deserved it. It's my fault more than anyone. I'm weak and had no business going out in the dark to help anyone when I can't even help myself.

Stupid.

And people paid the price for my ignorance.

Calvin. Just the name makes me choke. And Lily.

I know they all said we'd get them back but how? Where? When? How could I let them down like this?

Merrick leaves briefly then returns. I can feel him climb in beside me and he rubs my shoulder lightly.

"Sherry, I brought you some tea. You need to get something in you."

I open my eyes and look up at him leaning over me. There's a flashlight in the corner, pointed to the ceiling to illuminate the room. He's holding a gla.s.s of sweet tea and a napkin with a few slices of cheese and rolled ham on it. There is no blame in his eyes. Nothing but concern and love.

"Merrick. This is all my fault. I know you'll say that it's not, but it is. I was so stupid. I was so-" a sob chokes my plea.

"Stop, Sherry." He frames my face, forcing me to look at him. "Don't do this to yourself, sweetheart. No one blames you because it's not your fault. You tried to help someone. Who could blame you for that? If that were the case then I'd be to blame for what Phillip did to you, the first time."

"What?! No! How?"

"Well, he told me how he felt and I gave him the benefit of the doubt. If I hadn't done that and made sure to-"

"That's not the same thing, Merrick."

"Isn't it?"

"Merrick."

"Sherry," he breathes, ordering and begging me to understand and let it drop.

"What do we do now?" I say, my voice cracking.

"You eat and tell me how the heck you survived the night. I stay here with you and keep you warm until you fall asleep. Then tonight, we kill some Lighters and get back our kids."

I have never been more proud of him. My heart wants to burst from my chest and the annoying tears come again. He wraps his arms around me, lying us back on our backs. I nibble my cheese and drink my tea through the straw, as ordered.

I tell him the whole story. About the Lighter tricking us and then the next one with his filthy talk, about Phillip. Not even leaving out the part where Cain and I had to lay wrapped around each other to keep warm. I know he won't be jealous of that and I want to be completely honest with him.

Always.

So I even spurt out about how Cain kissed me in the coffee shop that day, to save me from being discovered and questioned.

"Cain has apologized to me for it so many times," I explain. "I just want to be completely honest with you. I'm sorry I didn't tell you before. It was wrong of me to keep it from you."

"Sherry, the man saved your life. Twice, now it seems. I can't be mad at him. Or you. I owe him everything."

He tells me how lucky I am. How dumb I was for thinking I could handle things on my own, without him and he hopes I've learned my lesson this time, that we're a team. Always. Then he whispers that everything will be fine, he's happy I'm ok, he was so worried about me, he loves me. I drift off to sleep somehow at more peace than I ever would have thought imaginable.

We will get them back. We will.

After what I can guess is a couple hours I wake up and Merrick is looking at my leg, rewrapping it with care and looks up to see me watching him. He finishes quickly and comes to lay on his side beside me, leaning on his elbow.

"How do you feel?" he asks.

"I'll feel better when we get on with the plan to get the kids back."

At first I thought he'd argue with me about the word 'we', me implying I'm going too. He doesn't, in fact, he reacts as though that's the best news yet.

"Great. Let's go warrior," he says smiling and lifts me up in his arms.

He doesn't carry me but sets me down to my good foot, letting me lean on him. What's up with him? I thought for sure I'd have to fight him to let me keep my dignity and hobble myself in there to meet the others. I look at him questioningly.

I know you don't want me to carry you out there in front of all of them, do you?

He smiles a knowing smile with a raised eyebrow as he speaks. A smug he knows me smile.

Cute.

I realize what he's doing. He's letting me get some of my dignity back from my breakdown earlier. He knew I wouldn't want him to carry me like some broken rag doll. He's already done that more than enough lately when I had no other choice.

Now I do.

Just when you think you can't love someone more. When you think they can't possibly know you more than they already do...

"Nope." I smile back and we leave our room, hobbling.

Everyone is already there, either in the kitchen door way or stacked in the commons room. Everyone looks eager and anxious. Some have coffee in hand, others have biscuits or crackers. Some have all three.

No one seems to be particularly interested in me but Danny, Ryan, Cain, Miguel and even Josh who are watching me the whole time with anxious eyes. Well, I guess that is a lot.

Everyone else is glued to Jeff, who is giving what I can only describe as a battle decree.

"Thank you. I know how bad you want to pick me up and carry me," I whisper to Merrick as he navigates through scattered people sitting cross legged on the floor.

Yes. I do. And it's killing me watching you struggle needlessly, but I know you need this. Even if you are just being stubborn. He cuts his eyes sideways to peek at me and smiles. I'm gonna go get you some breakfast. Sit here.

He brings me beside Danny who takes my hand to settle me beside him on the couch. Ryan gets up to take the chair arm instead so I can have his seat. Danny pats my leg and gives me a look, like 'how can you keep doing this to me', then props my leg up on his knee and I'm shocked to see how blue and black my foot is sticking out through the end. Swollen too.

I hear Danny suck in his breath and Celeste gasp beside him. But I wave off their concern and try to focus on what Jeff is saying but I can't. My eyes skim the sea of faces. Battered and bruised and st.i.tched and bandaged. The wave of guilt comes rolling back to me, cras.h.i.+ng over me.

Then I see Lana. Refusing to meet anyone's eyes. Staring at the wall. I continue to look at her. Willing her to look at me. When she finally does I immediately regret it. The pain and confusion in her eyes is too much to look at without wincing.

I sign 'I'm sorry', placing my right hand over my heart in a fist in a circular motion while still mouthing 'sorry'. She nods and wipes tears but turns back to the wall again. She's lost the only person in the world she can talk to. Literally.

Merrick promptly returns with coffee and a cereal bar for me. The brown brew is the perfect balance of sweet and cream.

He crouches down in front of me and we all sit back and absorb Jeff. He is excited in a furious way. Ready to set out and inflict revenge and retaliation on their opposites. The Lighters may have ultimately won the battle, getting the prize, but Jeff is determined to win the war.

"So, the way I see it. With all the gifts that the Specials have acquired here, I don't see any reason that we can't go there and take them back. Josh can see through the walls, Trudy can hear things far off, Danny can plant thoughts, Celeste can find the children by focusing on them and Marissa can compel them to do anything. The Keepers can be the muscle. We can do this."

He goes on to tell us the plan in it's entirety. We wait until nightfall. We send someone out as bait for a Lighter. We know one will come since they seem to be running rampant. We capture it and bring it down for 'questioning'. He didn't further elaborate on 'questioning' and I didn't want him to.

Everyone is in agreement. No one said, 'hey, it's just a couple kids, we can't risk out lives for them.' Everyone was upset and ready to get to the action. To the doing and not sitting part.

Once we capture it, we get what info we need, leading us to where Lily and Calvin are. He lets us know where and we go and meet them there. Sounds simple enough.

It's decided that Miguel will be the bait. It can't be a Keeper or they may not want to attack as easily and we don't wanna chance it taking long because it's wary. Miguel can fight better than any of us, so he volunteered. Oh boy. It begins.

Merrick, Jeff, Kay, Ryan, Josh and Danny, who insisted on helping and Merrick told him he could stand watch at the door, will wait to ambush the Lighter once Miguel lures it out. Then they interrogate.

"Now, Sherry. I'll need you for some of the questioning. We'll need to know if it's lying or not about where Calvin and Lily are. Are you gonna be ok with that?" Jeff asks, looking me dead in the eye and raising sympathetic eyebrows.

"Of course." It's all I can say.

The meeting ends and some take off to get some rest as all of these plans will take place at night fall. A lot of them stop to talk to me before heading separate ways. Josh kneels down in front of me and ask me, I counted at least five, if I'm ok in between other adamant questions. I a.s.sure him I am before he pats my arm and takes off after Miguel, who also asked how my leg was feeling.

After rib crus.h.i.+ng hugs from Ryan and Trudy, I ask Merrick to help me with a shower. He does and joins me, insisting it would be easier to hold me up that way. I agree.

After he helps me get undressed he hops in with me, adjusting the water to my liking and holding me gently from behind around my ribs with one arm. The water is so hot and good. I hang my head and let it roll down my back. Merrick kneads my back and shoulders.

After a freezing, miserable night on the rock hard ground with wounds to boot, I can't remember the last time anything felt so good.

I lean back against him and he feathers some light kisses on my shoulders and neck, sweeping my hair aside. It feels like an eternity since we've been together like this, though it's only been a couple nights .

Even though I'm black and blue, beaten and broken, I can't let this opportunity slip by. This could very well be our last night. Alive. We are going Lighter hunting, then bringing that Lighter into our home, then setting out into the enemy's camp to save our own people. We might not make it past midnight with those odds.

I coax him to let me turn around to face him and wrap my arms around his neck. He knows what I'm up to and immediately goes into protective mode.

"Sherry Elizabeth," he says firmly and with reprimand. He tries to remove my arms from his neck but I resist. "Honey, we can't. Your leg."

"My leg has nothing to do with this," I say as I kiss my way up from his neck to his scruffy chin.

I hear him let out the tiniest groan and then shakes his head, back to business.

"No. You're hurt and bruised all over. I'll hurt you. No, Sherry. Come on. Let's get you back to our room. You can take a nap and get ready for tonight."

"I don't want a nap, well, not yet. I want a nap later, with you. Who knows what will happen tonight, Merrick. Be with me. Please." I'm not giving up and I throw out the serious pout.

I need this, to not think about Lily and Calvin, about my leg, about the guilt I feel, about everyone else who might not make it tonight.

Merrick will cave. I know it. I know him. I feel him s.h.i.+ft on his feet and blow out a breath as I press myself to him and pull him down to kiss me. I try for my most seductive, pulling out all the tricks. The few I know. I nibble his bottom lip, fist his hair, trace his lip with my tongue. He responds just as I knew he would.

He bellows out a frustrated groan, at himself not me, for his weakness to my ploys. He pulls his arms around my waist tightly and kisses me with all he's got. The thrill of victory only fuels me to new heights. He lifts me, pus.h.i.+ng me against the wall but gently. I can tell he's still trying not to jostle me too much. But it is too much. I wince and he immediately notices, halting.

"It's ok," I start before he can tell me 'I told you so'. "Let's go back to the room. Now, please, Merrick."

To my astonishment he complies, with emphasis. I am so confounded about these powers of womanly persuasion I somehow possess over Merrick, but grateful. He dresses me and himself and carries me to our room. I don't protest this time. This is no time for hobbling slowness.

Once we reach our room he lays me down, placing a pillow under my hurt leg and kisses me again, bracing himself over me on his elbows. Sweet long drugging kisses. He plays in my now longer hair with his fingers, kisses my bruised neck and collar bone gently, nibbles my lips and chin and fingertips. Driving me crazy. The already warm room seems to rise a few more degrees in temperature as he undresses me gently in the dark.

We wake up some time later to a knock on our door. Merrick quickly pulls the blanket over us, just in case. Jeff indicates through the door that its almost time and we should come get some supper.

I'm grateful he didn't barge in like some people do. We hadn't dressed after our afternoon...um...rendezvous. I had fallen asleep quickly, completely exhausted after all the things Merrick had done to me and sweet things he had said to relax and rea.s.sure me.

I drifted off to him whispering that we would all be ok tonight, we'll get Lily back, Calvin's fine, not to worry, go to sleep.

But I will worry. A lot. Merrick would be outside with a Lighter, maybe more than one. Without me. Though he would probably be relieved about that fact. I seem to attract trouble as he had once told me, like a magnet. And it was true.

Every time trouble or injuries could seek me out, they did. I would wind up in the way and on his mind with who knows how many more injuries. And that would lead him to trouble and distracted and I'd never forgive myself if something happened to him. How did I ever survive without him here before, literally.

Maggie had laid low with the rest of them during all the excitement, sleeping in the second room. Too aged to really do much good in helping us. But she made us all a big batch of cookies and sweet tea and been as helpful as can be at her age.

They seem to be as contemplative of our situation as everyone else, though they are the newest members. I hadn't even heard Maggie and Pap bicker once all day.

Cain made his way over at some point to ask how I was doing, as I sat on the couch. I used both hands to pull him down to me and wrap my arms around his neck as he squatted down to be at my level. I would not be alive were it not for this man.

I squeeze him so tightly, realizing I hadn't even spoken to him since the cave. He rubs his hand on my back awkwardly at first, probably thinking Merrick will get upset if he sees him hugging me. Probably wondering if I've told Merrick about the caves. Probably wondering if I've even told Merrick about that little diversion kiss in the coffee shop, but he doesn't know Merrick like I do.

"Thank you. So much. If it hadn't been for you, I wouldn't have made it. I know it, you saved me life," I say, pulling back just enough to see his face.

"I shouldn't have let you go out there to begin with."

"You tried to stop me," I remind him.

"Not very well apparently," he says laughing sadly.

"I'm stubborn to a fault, I'm sorry. I think I learned my lesson, though. When people tell me to do things, I'm gonna start listening," I say, my voice cracking with emotion.