Mabel's Mistake Part 44

"'I knew you were here alone,' she said, 'may I come in?'

"How pretty she looked, standing there in her dress of thin blue muslin, her golden hair falling about that lovely face which, probably, had never in her whole life been disturbed by a single thought or fancy that could cause pain to another.

"'So the General has gone to Cadiz,' she said, as she came into the room and flung herself in a graceful att.i.tude on the sofa near me. 'How lost dear Mrs. Harrington will be;--we must all try to console her.'

"I was so unreasonable and bad tempered that I fear my first impulse was to ask her what possible right she could have to offer the lady consolation; but I managed to keep back that little ebullition of temper, and answered, instead--

"'He will only be gone a few days; Mrs. Harrington will not have a great deal of time to be lonely.'

"'And then she has you with her, and I can't fancy anybody feeling solitary, dear Miss Crawford, while they can have your society.'

"'Dear Miss Crawford,' was in no mood to accept compliments patiently--they would have had a false ring to my ear at that moment, coming even from those whom I knew well and loved, so they were not likely to be accepted with good grace from this comparative stranger. I suppose she would have thought me unkind for considering her so, but I never found it easy to get up the girlish enthusiasm necessary for cementing sudden and violent friends.h.i.+p.

"'That is a very pretty speech,' I said bluntly, 'but it doesn't mean anything at all.'

"Lucy dropped her tiny hands and went off into a peal of laughter that, I must confess, was sweet as a chime of silver bells.

"'You do say the oddest things!' she exclaimed. 'I never knew any one so original as you are, but dear Miss Crawford, though I like it exceedingly myself, do you think--'

"She hesitated, and as I saw she never would finish her sentence unless I asked the desired question, I inquired--

"'Do I think what, Miss Eaton?'

"'That--that gentlemen quite like it. Young girls have to be so particular, you know, or they displease them.'

"'Really,' I said, 'I have never taken the trouble to think about the matter; and to tell you the truth, I fear I should not much care, even if I had.'

"'Ah, to be sure, you are differently situated from so many girls--with your beauty and your great fortune, whatever you say or do will always be thought charming--Oh, dear Miss Crawford, I did not mean that--indeed I did not! Now you are vexed with me, I am sure.'

"'I am not quite bad tempered enough to take offence where none is meant, Miss Eaton.'

"'Bad tempered? Why, I think you have the sweetest disposition I ever knew! Mamma was saying only this morning, that you had a face like an angel.'

"I doubted that, for I was confident Mrs. Eaton had no great prepossession in my favor, but of course I let it pa.s.s.

"'I am so heedless,' moaned Lucy; 'I say everything that comes in my head--mamma says she wishes I could acquire a little of your dignity--but I never shall be like you--never.'

"The glance of self satisfaction which she cast in the mirror where her pretty figure was reflected gracefully curled up among the sofa cus.h.i.+ons, was extremely amusing to me.

"'I think,' I said, 'that you may congratulate yourself on there being no resemblance between us.'

"'Oh, that was not what I meant,' she replied. 'You are very beautiful, and I am sure n.o.body would ever say that of poor little me.'

"I thought I had now talked all the nonsense that the most exaggerated idea of courtesy could require, so I said--

"'You must not think me unkind, but--'

"'Unkind?' she repeated. 'I never knew you to have an unkind thought.

Whatever you do or say would always be considered charming.'

"'More pretty speeches,' said I, trying to laugh, for I had the grace to feel a little ashamed of my ill humor. 'You quite overwhelm me with them to-day--let me try my skill. Do you know that your dress is particularly becoming, and that you are looking your very loveliest to-day?'

"'Oh, my! no,' returned she, glancing at herself in the opposite mirror.

'I don't think the dress pretty at all--it's mamma's taste--and I am sure I am looking horribly. I told mamma I would not come in, only I was certain there was n.o.body here beside you.'

"'I have not seen Mrs. Harrington since the General left,' I said, by way of trying to bear my part in the conversation more than from any other reason; 'but her son is with her.'

"'Mr. Harrington is so devoted to his mother,' exclaimed Lucy. 'Mamma says that he is a model, and that so good a son could not fail to make--'

"She broke off with a little attempt at embarra.s.sment, that was rather a failure.

"'Would make a good husband, you mean, I suppose,' returned I. 'That is the old proverb, I believe.'

"'Yes--but I hesitated--I'm so foolish. It always seems immodest to name such things outright.'

"'I am sorry that I am immodest,' said I, 'but straight-forward words are natural to me, and I utter them abruptly sometimes.'

"'I suppose I really ought to go and see if I can do anything for Mrs.

Harrington. She is probably alone by this time.'

"At that moment the door opened, and James looked into the room. He did not see Lucy Eaton where he stood, and said coldly enough--

"'Miss Crawford, if you have leisure, my mother would like to see you.'

"'Certainly,' I said, rising.

"'And I must go back,' cried Lucy, springing up in a flutter. 'Mamma will positively think I am lost.'

"'Good morning, Miss Eaton,' James said; 'pray excuse me. I supposed Miss Crawford was alone. I beg pardon of both for having interrupted you.'

"'Oh, there was no interruption,' said Lucy, moving toward him with her thin dress sweeping out like a cloud. 'We were through talking, and what do you suppose it was all about?' she added coquettishly.

"'I really have no idea,' he answered, with a degree of indifference that I wondered she did not notice.

"'I am sure I shall not tell you,' she said, tossing her curls. 'We'll not tell, will we, Miss Crawford?' I was busy putting away some books that had been lying on a chair, and so had an excuse for being conveniently deaf.

"'Since you are so determined, it would be useless for me to attempt to persuade you,' James replied, and I knew that he was trying to be polite in order to hide how it bored him to stand there and talk nonsense.

"I think that a few days before it would have pleased me to have this proof that Mr. Harrington did not care so much for pretty Lucy Eaton, but it brought me no satisfaction now. Straightway, as if something had whispered it in my ear, came the reason for his indifference. His mind was so completely engrossed by thoughts of our conversation about the girl Zillah, that there was no room for other ideas to find a place.

"The bare idea turned me faint with indignation and disquiet. The worst thing of all--the hardest to bear--was to lose my respect for him; and he was forcing me rapidly to do that.

"If he had loved Lucy Eaton, it would have been an honorable affection, such as every man has a right to choose for himself; but in this entanglement, which I was more and more convinced fettered his feelings and movements, there could be nothing but secresy and dishonor.

"I wanted to go away--to get beyond the sight of his face--the sound of his voice. As I stood there listening to their idle conversation, I felt that I almost hated the man. With his wicked secret on his soul what right had he to bring himself into the presence of innocent women, and a.s.sume a position of equality with them. I knew how foolish it all was--I tried to think that the meanness was in my entertaining such suspicions, but I could no more change my feelings than I could banish my doubts.

"I walked to the door; as James stepped aside to allow us to pa.s.s, I caught one strange, troubled look from his eyes, which I could not understand. Did it mean that he believed I had divined his secret, and was appealing to my generosity for silence?

"There was no time to think about it. Lucy was holding me by the sleeve and saying--