A Select Collection of Old English Plays Volume Ii Part 57

WIT.

Then must I p.r.i.c.k you, child, if you be drown'd in sloth.

NATURE.

Agree, you twain, for I must leave you both; Farewell, my son: farewell, mine own good Will, Be ruled by Wit, and be obedient still; Force thee I cannot, but as far as lies in me, I will help thy master to make a good servant of thee.

Farewell-- [_Exit_.

WIT.

Adieu, lady mother, with thanks for all your pain; And now let me bethink myself again and eke again, To match with Science is the thing that I have took in hand: A matter of more weight, I see, than I did understand.

Will must be won to this, or else it will be hard; Will must go break the matter first, or else my game[384] is marr'd, Sir boy, are you content to take such part for me, As G.o.d shall send, and help it forth as much as lies in thee?

WILL.

Yea, master, by his wounds, or else cut off his head.

WIT.

Come then, and let us two devise what trace were best to tread; Nature is on my side, and Will my boy is fast.

There is no doubt I shall obtain my joys at last.

[_Exeunt_.

ACT II, SCAENA 1.

WIT _and_ WILL.

WIT.

What, Will, I say, Will boy, come again, foolish elf!

WILL.

I cry you mercy, sir, you are a tall man yourself.

WIT.

Such a crackbrain as thou art, I never saw the like to it.

WILL.

Truth, in respect of you, that are nothing else but Wit!

WIT.

Canst thou tell me thy errand, because thou art gone so soon?

WILL.

I can remember a long tale of a man in the moon, With such a circ.u.mstance and such flim-flam?

I will tell, at a word, whose servant I am: Wherefore I come, and what I have to say, And call for her answer, before I come away.

What, should I make a broad tree of every little shrub, And keep her a great while with a tale of a tub?

WIT.

Yet thou must commend me to be rich, l.u.s.ty, pleasant, and wise.

WILL.

I cannot commend you, but I must make twenty lies.

Rich, quoth you? that appeareth by the port that you keep: Even as rich as a new-shorn sheep!

Of pleasant conceits, ten bushels to the peck, l.u.s.ty like a herring, with a bell about his neck, Wise as a woodc.o.c.k: as brag as a bodylouse, A man of your hands, to match with a mouse!

How say you, are not these proper qualities to praise you with?

WIT.

Leave these mad toys of thine, and come to the pith: One part of the errand should have been To give her this picture of mine to be seen, And to request her the same to accept, Safely until my coming to be kept, Which I suspend till thy return, and then, If it like her ladys.h.i.+p to appoint me where and when, I will wait upon her gladly out of hand.

WILL.

Sir, let me alone: your mind I understand.

I will handle the matter, so that you shall owe me thanks, But what, if she find fault with these spindle-shanks, Or else with these black spots on your nose?

WIT.

In faith, sir boy, this talk deserveth blows.

WILL.

You will not misuse your best servant, I suppose?

For, by his nails and by his fingers too, I will mar your marriage, if you do so.[385]

WIT.

I pray thee go thy ways, and leave this clatter.

WILL.

First shall I be so bold to break to you a matter.

WIT.

Tush, thou art disposed to spend words in waste, And yet thou knowest this business asketh haste.

WILL.

But even two words, and then I am gone.

WIT.

If it be worth the hearing, say on.

WILL.

I would not have you think that I, for my part, From my promise or from your service will depart, But yet now and then it goeth to my heart, When I think how this marriage may be to my smart.

WIT.

Why so?

WILL.

I would tell you the cause, if I durst for shame.

WIT.

Speak hardily what thou wilt without any blame.

WILL.

I am not disposed as yet to be tame, And therefore I am loth to be under a dame, Now you are a bachelor, a man may soon win you, Me-thinks there is some good fellows.h.i.+p in you; We may laugh and be merry at board and at bed, You are not so testy as those that be wed.