A Select Collection of Old English Plays Volume Ix Part 66

MEMORIA.

ANAMNESTES, _Memoria's page_.

SOMNUS.

Personae quarum mentio tantum fit. _Psyche_, _Acrasia_, _Veritas_, _Oblivio_.

_The scene is Microcosmus[167] in a grove.

The time from morning till night_.

LINGUA.

ACTUS PRIMUS, SCAENA PRIMA.

LINGUA _apparelled in a crimson satin gown, a dressing of white roses, a little skene[168] tied in a purple scarf, a pair of white buskins[169] drawn with white ribbon, silk garters, gloves, &c_. AUDITUS _in a garland of bays intermingled with red and white roses upon a false hair, a cloth of silver mantle upon a pair of satin bases, wrought sleeves, buskins, gloves, &c_.

LINGUA, AUDITUS.

LIN. Nay, good Auditus, do but hear me speak.

AUD. Lingua, thou strik'st too much upon one string, Thy tedious plain-song[170] grates my tender ears.

LIN. 'Tis plain indeed, for truth no descant needs; Una's her name, she cannot be divided.

AUD. O, but the ground[171] itself is naught, from whence Thou canst not relish out a good division: Therefore at length surcease, prove not stark-mad, Hopeless to prosecute a hapless suit: For though (perchance) thy first strains pleasing are, I dare engage mine ear the close[172] will jar.

LIN. If then your confidence esteem my cause To be so frivolous and weakly wrought, Why do you daily subtle plots devise, To stop me from the ears of common sense?

Whom since our great queen Psyche hath ordain'd, For his sound wisdom, our vice-governor, To him and to his two so wise a.s.sistants, Nimble Phantastes and firm Memory, Myself and cause I humbly do commit.

Let them but hear and judge; I wish no more.

AUD. Should they but know thy rash presumption, They would correct it in the sharpest sort: Good Jove! what sense hast thou to be a sense!

Since from the first foundation of the world, We never were accounted more than five.

Yet you, forsooth, an idle prating dame, Would fain increase the number, and upstart To our high seats, decking your babbling self With usurp'd t.i.tles of our dignity.

LIN. An idle prating dame! know, fond Auditus, Records affirm my t.i.tle full as good, As his amongst the five is counted best.

AUD. Lingua, confess the truth: thou'rt wont to lie.

LIN. I say so too, therefore I do not lie.

But now, spite of you all, I speak the truth.

You five among us subjects tyrannise; Making the sacred name of Common Sense A cloak to cover your enormities: He bears the rule; he's judge, but judgeth still, As he's inform'd by your false evidence: So that a plaintiff cannot have access, But through your gates. He hears, but what? nought else, But what thy crafty ears to him conveys: And all he sees is by proud Visus show'd him: And what he touches is by Tactus' hand; And smells, I know, but through Olfactus' nose; Gustus begins to him whate'er he tastes: By these quaint tricks free pa.s.sage hath been barr'd, That I could never equally be heard.

But well, 'tis well.

AUD. Lingua, thy feeble s.e.x Hath hitherto withheld my ready hands, That long'd to pluck that nimble instrument.

LIN. O horrible ingrat.i.tude! that thou-- That thou of all the rest should'st threaten me: Who by my means conceiv'st as many tongues, As Neptune closeth lands betwixt his arms: The ancient Hebrew clad with mysteries: The learned Greek rich in fit epithets, Bless'd in the lovely marriage of pure words: The Chaldee wise, th'Arabian physical, The Roman eloquent and Tuscan grave, The braving Spanish and the smooth-tongu'd French: These precious jewels that adorn thine ears, All from my mouth's rich cabinet are stolen.

How oft hast thou been chain'd unto my tongue, Hang'd at my lips, and ravish'd with my words; So that a speech fair-feather'd could not fly, But thy ear's pitfall caught it instantly?

But now, O heavens!

AUD. O heavens! thou wrong'st me much, Thou wrong'st me much thus falsely to upbraid me: Had not I granted thee the use of hearing, That sharp-edged tongue whetted against her master, Those puffing lungs, those teeth, those drowsy lips, That scalding throat, those nostrils full of ire, Thy palate, proper instrument of speech, Like to the winged chanters of the wood, Uttering nought else but idle sifflements,[173]

Tunes without sense, words inarticulate, Had ne'er been able t' have abus'd me thus.

Words are thy children, but of my begetting.

LIN. Perfidious liar, how can I endure thee!

Call'st my unspotted chast.i.ty in question?

O, could I use the breath mine anger spends, I'd make thee know--

AUD. Heav'ns look on my distress, Defend me from this railing viperess!

For if I stay, her words' sharp vinegar Will fret me through. Lingua, I must be gone: I hear one call me more than earnestly.

[_Exit_ AUDITUS.

LIN. May the loud cannoning of thunderbolts, Screeking of wolves, howling of tortur'd ghosts, Pursue thee still, and fill thy amaz'd ears With cold astonishment and horrid fears!

O, how these senses m.u.f.fle Common Sense!

And more and more with pleasing objects strive To dull his judgment and pervert his will To their behests: who, were he not so wrapp'd I'the dusky clouds of their dark policies, Would never suffer right to suffer wrong.

Fie, Lingua, wilt thou now degenerate?

Art not a woman? dost not love revenge?

Delightful speeches, sweet persuasions, I have this long time us'd to get my right.

My right--that is, to make the senses six; And have both name and power with the rest.

Oft have I season'd savoury periods With sugar'd words, to delude Gustus' taste, And oft embellish'd my entreative phrase With smelling flow'rs of vernant rhetoric, Limning and flas.h.i.+ng it with various dyes, To draw proud Visus to me by the eyes; And oft perfum'd my pet.i.tory[174] style With civet-speech, t'entrap Olfactus' nose; And clad myself in silken eloquence, To allure the nicer touch of Tactus' hand.

But all's become lost labour, and my cause Is still procrastinated: therefore now, Hence, ye base offspring of a broken mind, Supple entreaties and smooth flatteries: Go kiss the love-sick lips of puling gulls,[175]

That 'still their brain to quench their love's disdain: Go gild the tongues of bawds and parasites; Come not within my thoughts. But thou, deceit, Break up the pleasure of my brimful breast, Enrich my mind with subtle policies.

Well then, I'll go; whither? nay, what know I?

And do, in faith I will, the devil knows what.

What, if I set them all at variance, And so obtain to speak? it must be so.

It must be so, but how? there lies the point: How? thus: tut, this device will never prove, Augment it so: 'twill be too soon descried; Or so, nor so; 'tis too-too dangerous.

Pish, none of these! what, if I take this course? ha!

Why, there it goes; good, good; most excellent!

He that will catch eels must disturb the flood; The chicken's hatch'd, i' faith; for they are proud, And soon will take a cause of disagreement.

SCAENA SECUNDA.

MENDACIO, _attired in a taffeta suit of a light colour changeable, like an ordinary page_.[176]

LINGUA, MENDACIO.

LIN. I see the heavens nurse my new-born device; For lo, my page Mendacio comes already, To file and burnish that I hammer'd out.

Never in better time, Mendacio, What! hast thou done?

MEN. Done? yes, long ago.

LIN. Is't possible thou shouldst despatch so soon?

MEN. Madam, I had no sooner told Tactus that Gustus would fain speak with him, But I spied Visus, Gustus, and the rest, And serv'd them all with sauce of several lies.