The Lunatic at Large Part 34

"Zey vill not take you ven you tell zem! I shall insist viz Sir Richard!"

"The law is the law, Baron, and I'm a certified lunatic. Here we must part till the weather clears; and mind, you mustn't say a word about my coming to see you."

The Baron looked at him disconsolately.

"You most really go, Bonker?"

"Really, Baron."

"And vere to?"

"To London town again by the milk train."

"And vat vill you do zere?"

"Look for my name."

"Bot how?"

Mr Bunker hesitated.

"I have a little clue," he said at last, "only a thread, but I'll try it for what it's worth."

"Haf you money enoff?"

"Thanks to your generosity and my skill at billiards, yes, which reminds me that I must return poor Trelawney's ten pounds some day. At present, I can't afford to be scrupulous. So, you see, I'm provided for."

"Cigars at least, Bonker! You most smoke, my frient vizout a name!"

The Baron, night-s.h.i.+rted and barefooted as he was, dived into his portmanteau and produced a large box of cigars.

"You like zese, Bonker. Zey are your own choice. Smoke zem and zink of me!"

"A few, Baron, would be a pleasant reminiscence," said his friend, with a smile, "if you really insist."

"All, Bonker,-I vill not keep vun! I can get more. No, you most take zem all!"

Mr Bunker opened his bag and put in the box without a word.

"You most write," said the Baron, "tell me vere you are. I shall not tell any soul, bot ven I can, I shall gom up, and ve shall sup togezzer vunce more. Pairhaps ve may haf anozzer adventure, ha, ha!"

The Baron's laugh was almost too hearty to be true.

"I shall let you know, as soon as I find a room. It won't be in the Mayonaise this time! Good-bye: good sport and luck in love!"

"Good-bye, my frient, good-bye," said the Baron, squeezing his hand.

His friend was half out of the door when he turned, and said with an intonation quite foreign either to Beveridge or Bunker, and yet which came very pleasantly, "I forgot to warn you of one thing when I advised you to try the _role_ of certified lunatic-you are not likely to make so good a friend as I have."

He shut the door noiselessly and was gone.

The Baron stood in the middle of the floor for fully five minutes, looking blankly at the closed door; then with a sigh he turned out the light and tumbled into bed again.

PART IV.

CHAPTER I.

The Dover express was nearing town: evening had begun to draw in, and from the wayside houses people saw the train roar by like a huge glowworm; but they could hardly guess that it was hurrying two real actors to the climax of a real comedy.

From the opposite sides of a first-cla.s.s carriage these two looked cheerfully at one another. The Channel was safely behind them, London was close ahead, and the piston of the engine seemed to thump a triumphal air.

"We've done it, Twiddel, my boy!" said the one.

"Thank Heaven!" replied the other.

"_And_ myself," added his friend.

"Yes," said Twiddel; "you played your part uncommonly well, Welsh."

"It was the deuce of a fine spree!" sighed Welsh.

"The deuce," a.s.sented Twiddel.

"I'm only sorry it's all over," Welsh went on, gazing regretfully up at the lamp of the carriage. "I'd give the remains of my character and my chance of a public funeral to be starting again from Paris by the morning train!"

Twiddel laughed.

"With the same head you had that morning?"

"Yes, by George! Even with the same mile of dusty gullet!"

"It's all over now," said Twiddel, philosophically, and yet rather nervously-"at least the amusing part of it."

"All the fun, my boy, all the fun. All the dinners and the drinks, and the touching of hats to the aristocratic travellers, and the girls that sighed, and the bowing and sc.r.a.ping. Do you remember the sporting baronet who knew my uncle? Now, I'm plain Robert Welsh, whose uncles, as far as I am aware, don't know a baronet among 'em."

He smiled a little sardonically.

"And the baron at Fogelschloss," said Twiddel.

"Who insisted on learning my pedigree back to Alfred the Great! Gad, I gave it him, though, and I doubt whether the real Essington could have done as much. I'd rather surprise some of these n.o.blemen if I turned up again in my true character!"