Boy Meets Nerd Part 20

The silver Prius was parked perfectly between the lines unlike Em, who had a habit of parking so crooked they could barely open their doors without hitting the car next to them. He'd made fun of her for it and she'd grumbled that it was the least of her concerns when there were firewalls to build.

He smiled slightly, staring at the car, remembering her cute little scowl. "No. I borrowed it from a friend."

Chapter 21.

It looked like someone threw up on his plate. Levi grimaced, staring down at the mix of brown and green Indian food. His stomach grumbled, but not for this.

"Try it," Heidi pushed. "Come on."

He felt like he was six years old again. Would she be offended if he plugged his nose? With a deep breath, he scooped a small bite and popped it in his mouth. G.o.d, it was bad. He fought to keep it in his mouth instead of spitting it out in a napkin.

"It's good, right?" Her eyes brightened.

Swallowing, he grabbed his water and chugged several gulps. "Mmhmm," he answered, nodding.

She clapped her hands. "I knew I'd get you to like it." Smiling, she watched him. Waiting for him to take another bite?

h.e.l.l no. He sighed. "Heidi. I'm sorry. This is terrible. Really terrible."

"Oh." Her face fell.

"I tried to like it but there's just no way I can force another bite of that down." He chuckled.

"Well, maybe something else." She waved to the waiter but Levi grabbed her hand, stopping her.

Looking her dead in the eye, he said, "Nothing else."

"Okay." She frowned.

Disappointing her wasn't fun but he didn't want lying to become a habit, for either of them.

"Oh! Look what I grabbed!" she said, pulling something out of her purse. At least she recovered from the disappointment quickly.

She placed a flyer on the table. A flyer for an open house at a real estate office. He gave her a puzzled look.

She smiled. "I figured, since you're here, we can go look at houses. The neighborhood near the school where I teach is great for kids. We'll need something with a fence of course "

Whoa. What the h.e.l.l? "Wait. What?"

"Well, we might as well look while you're here. I know it'll take some time before you actually move, but we should start shopping now. And the fence is for Jack. He's hyper and..."

A loud ringing started in his ears. All he heard was moving, houses, and kids. He felt like a deer in headlights, he could only imagine what he looked like.

Breathe. Just breathe. "Heidi." s.h.i.+t. How did he get himself out of this mess? "I'm not moving here."

She furrowed her brow. "But...isn't that why you came?"

He shook his head. "No. I came here to meet you. And to figure out how much of what you told me is the truth." A thought popped in his head. "And who the h.e.l.l is Jack?"

"Duh. My Pomeranian. I told you about him."

Recoiling, he shot back in his seat. Who was this girl? "Actually, you didn't. I'm allergic to dogs so I would've remembered that."

"Oh. Well, there's plenty of medication for that sort of thing."

That awful ringing in his ears started again. His stomach tied in knots. This was...just not right. There were big holes in her story, things in her life that didn't match up with what was in his head. She expected him to move there but hadn't even had the decency of telling him where she lived in the first place? Kids, a dog, a house? These were things they'd never discussed. He'd given her every bit of himself, his hopes and dreams, details about his past, everything. What she'd given him was appallingly lacking.

Who was Heidi Jacobs?

This whole thing felt wrong, so wrong it was making him sick to his stomach. It wasn't just the brown hair and the crooked teeth, the Indian food, and the fact that she lived in East b.u.mblef.u.c.k Ohio, it was all of it together. She was nothing like the girl he thought he might love.

Darren had been right. Hope was a figment.

He let Heidi babble on as he sorted through his muddled thoughts. There was no clear answer here. One thing he was learning about life, it was never black and white. He'd been so sure just one month ago, so confident he knew everything. Come to find out, he wasn't in control nearly as much as he'd thought.

After dinner, where he'd barely spoken a word, they left the restaurant and went back to the car. Emerson's car which happened to smell like her, bringing a sense of calm to his chaotic mind. The box of Gobstoppers still sat in the cup holder and made him smile. She used to pack two in her mouth at once, one in each cheek like a chipmunk. Oh h.e.l.l. Now he was thinking about her like she'd died.

Heidi shook his arm. "Levi! Are you listening?"

"What?" He snapped out of the memory then looked at the pa.s.senger seat. For a split second, he expected to find Em sitting there.

Instead, Heidi pouted up at him.

"Oh. Sorry. I s.p.a.ced out for a sec." He gave her a small smile. "Tired from the long trip I guess."

"I had no idea you were such a daydreamer. Must be a musician thing."

Musician. c.r.a.p. He'd completely forgotten he'd written her a song. He'd been waiting forever to sing it to her. He stared through the window, willing himself to want to sing for her, but he just didn't feel it. With Emerson, there'd been a spark of inspiration. It'd been a goofy song but it felt natural. He'd written a beautiful song about Hope, but this wasn't her. This was Heidi, who was turning out to be an entirely different person.

He forced himself to focus, to feel again. She was staring up at him, her lips parted. Her eyes closed halfway and she leaned toward him.

What? He inched away.

Her lips puckered a bit and she closed her eyes.

s.h.i.+t. She was going to kiss him.

He should give it a try. It was what he came here for. Just a few days ago, he'd wanted to f.u.c.k her. Now it seemed too weird, but he could try kissing her at least. Maybe there'd be a spark.

He leaned in and let their lips touch. She was a timid kisser. Softly, she moved her mouth against his, letting her tongue tease his lips.

He felt nothing. Not even a flutter of emotion.

When she pulled away, she blinked up at him sweetly, and his only thought was that he'd just cheated on Emerson.

Chapter 22.

Emerson spent most of the second morning wandering around the show floor, looking half-heartedly at the displays. Hacker conventions were known to be one of the most dangerous places in the world. About one third of the attendees were black hats hackers who used their powers for evil, so to speak. They didn't care about ethics or legality. They ran scams, stole money, and generally created chaos.

This made the rest of the attendees high risk of becoming victims if they weren't careful. Emerson, who was naturally paranoid, was as careful as one could get. But the last two days of having to stay on alert were starting to take their toll. Scared of her recent lack of focus, she was extra paranoid, and checked all her security settings a dozen times over again. She'd also stayed up late last night. Her intent had been to work on another contest but really she agonized about the job offer with ALV Tech.

No. If she were being honest with herself, she'd admit that really she'd agonized over missing Levi. The f.u.c.ker had lodged himself into her brain and wouldn't leave. When she saw him again, she was going to drop kick him off a cliff.

She chuckled at the imagery.

The urge to check on him was strong. She'd been fighting it for the last twelve hours. He'd have talked to Heidi by now, broken up with her. Was he hurting? She couldn't text him now even if she worked up the courage, not in the convention hall.

Suddenly uninterested in the rest of the program, she made her way back to her hotel room. This really wasn't like her at all. Normally she'd have been eager to soak up everything she could. Today, she felt like moping around in misery. But what did she have the right to be miserable about? She'd been offered a job with a starting salary of over a hundred thousand dollars. That was insane. She knew hackers had the potential to make income like that, but she was only twenty three. She barely felt like an adult. Letting her loose with that kind of money made her worry she'd go a little nuts. Money changed people.

But when had she been interested in financial gain anyway? Since living on Ramen noodles and ketchup sandwiches, maybe.

In the sort of security of her hotel room, she set up her laptop, checked on her firewall, then opened her email. Maybe she'd tell Jess about the job offer, get a second opinion.

She typed out an email quickly then sent it. Right away, an automated reply came.

I'm away on a spontaneous kayaking trip with my girlfriend. Don't know when I'll be back. Maybe never! Mwuahahahaha!

Seriously, I'm out of electronic range so don't try calling either.

Jess.

What? Why wouldn't she have told her that before she'd left? Ugh. Some roommate.

Pacing the room, she tried to work out why she was so anxious. It was as if she'd suddenly turned into a girl a girl that needed to...talk. What the h.e.l.l was wrong with her?

She eyed her phone on the desk. What would Levi be doing now? He'd have broken things off with Heidi last night so that meant he was probably just sitting around bored, right?

She chewed on her bottom lip a moment then finally came to a decision. She grabbed the new phone and dialed his number quickly before she changed her mind.

It rang twice then stopped. "Hey, Emmy."

Growling a little, she wondered if this had been a bad idea after all.

His chuckle came through the phone loud and clear. "Sorry. Couldn't resist. How's the conference?"

Terrible. Scary. Lonely. "Good."

"Good. Are you calling to plan when to meet up?"

That sounded a lot better than the truth that she was calling to hear his voice. "Um. Yeah. And to check, you know, how things went for you."

Silence. Uh oh. That didn't seem good. She regretted asking. Maybe dredging up that topic had been bad.

"Well, it's been...interesting." He cleared his throat. "Turns out we were wrong about the whole cheating thing. Mika is her cousin from Sweden. He's here visiting. With his wife."

She felt the blood drain from her face. Her stomach twisted. She plopped down on the bed and stared at the wall in front of her. "Well f.u.c.k."

"Yeah." He chuckled without humor. "That's what I said."

Her head swam. So many thoughts swirled about. So many fears. She'd led him wrong. Not only in the a.s.sumption Heidi was cheating, but then she'd gone and let Levi f.u.c.k her. She'd always known her job had ramifications, that she was changing people's lives, but she never thought she would f.u.c.k it up this bad.

Guilt ate at her first. Then worry. What did this mean for him? For them? Was he staying there with Heidi? Did he never want to speak to Emerson again?

No, he wouldn't do that. He didn't sound mad. But how was she going to spend eight hours in the car with him in two days?

"I'm so sorry, Levi," she forced out. "It's my fault. I should've double checked my information. We shouldn't have... G.o.d. I'm so sorry." This just sucked. Had he told Heidi yet? Did she hate him? Were things ruined for him and his dream girl?

"It's not your fault. I should've been more careful."

"Did you tell her?"

He sighed heavily. "Not yet. I'm trying but..." An awkward pause. "I don't know what I want anymore."

What did that mean? He wanted Heidi still, didn't he? Before she'd left that morning, she'd wondered, briefly, if after the whole mess with Heidi, maybe Levi would want to try dating her. As in a real relations.h.i.+p, not a rebound f.u.c.k then staying friends. For a moment, she'd even believed that a guy like him could love a girl like her. Deep down inside, she'd let herself hope. Hope that an escape from loneliness could be in her future. Hope that she wasn't doomed to become a crazy numbers lady, or an old spinster. For an insane minute, she'd even dreamt of a family with Levi.

But Heidi was real, and not a cheater, and maybe loved him. And maybe he loved her.

Her throat closed up. it was hard to breathe around the feeling of her heart shattering.

m.u.f.fled voices sounded in the background. "I gotta go," he said, rushed.

"Okay." She didn't even get to tell him about the job.

"Text me when you're leaving. I'll meet you at your parents' place."

"Okay."

Silence again, and she thought maybe he'd hung up already.

Then he whispered, "Bye, Em."

With the phone resting in her hand, she stared at the wall, mouth hanging open. It took a few minutes before she could think through what just happened. She'd rather avoid thinking about it at all but if she was going to see him in two days, that wouldn't work. She had to face him, what they'd done, eventually.