Dear Mr. Darcy Part 10

Kitty sends her love but is too busy to write as she is tr.i.m.m.i.n.g her bonnet.

Your good friend, Lydia Miss Eleanor Sotherton to Miss Lydia Bennet Bath, January 20 I wish we had some officers here, everyone is ancient, at least a hundred, and they talk of nothing but their gout, all except my sister Susan, who is newly engaged to Mr Wainwright. He is very handsome and very rich and I wish he had a brother for me to marry but he has only three sisters.

Frederick is surprisingly sober. Lucy is as prosy as ever. She is busy reading a novel which she insists is a history book. She is making extracts from it and then making notes on the extracts, just as if it were a learned work. She thinks it is a treatise on the iniquities of the Catholic Church and the causes of the French Revolution, when it is nothing but a story about a girl whose wicked father has locked her mother in the catacombs so that he can marry someone else. But at least it is better than her sermonizing and telling us to study all the time.

Hurry up and marry someone and then invite me to stay. If I have to live in Bath much longer I will die of boredom.

What is Kitty doing to her bonnet?

Your devoted friend, Ellie Miss Jane Bennet to Miss Elizabeth Bennet Gracechurch Street, London, January 22 My dearest Lizzy will, I am sure, be incapable of triumphing in her better judgment, at my expense, when I confess myself to have been entirely deceived in Miss Bingley's regard for me. But, my dear sister, though the event has proved you right, do not think me obstinate if I still a.s.sert that, considering what her behaviour was, my confidence was as natural as your suspicion. I do not at all comprehend her reason for wis.h.i.+ng to be intimate with me; but if the same circ.u.mstances were to happen again, I am sure I should be deceived again.

Caroline did not return my visit till yesterday; and not a note, not a line, did I receive in the meantime. When she did come, it was very evident that she had no pleasure in it; she made a slight, formal apology for not calling before, said not a word of wis.h.i.+ng to see me again, and was in every respect so altered a creature, that when she went away, I was perfectly resolved to continue the acquaintance no longer. I pity her, though I cannot help blaming her. She was very wrong in singling me out as she did; I can safely say that every advance to intimacy began on her side. But I pity her, because she must feel that she has been acting wrong, and because I am very sure that anxiety for her brother is the cause of it. I need not explain myself further; and though we know this anxiety to be quite needless, yet if she feels it, it will easily account for her behaviour to me; and so deservedly dear as he is to his sister, whatever anxiety she may feel on his behalf is natural and amiable.

I cannot but wonder, however, at her having any such fears now, because if he had at all cared about me, we must have met long, long ago. He knows of my being in town, I am certain, from something she said herself; and yet it would seem, by her manner of talking, as if she wanted to persuade herself that he is really partial to Miss Darcy. I cannot understand it. If I were not afraid of judging harshly, I should be almost tempted to say that there is a strong appearance of duplicity in all this. But I will endeavour to banish every painful thought, and think only of what will make me happy-your affection, and the invariable kindness of my dear uncle and aunt. Let me hear from you very soon.

Miss Bingley said something of his never returning to Netherfield again, of giving up the house, but not with any certainty. We had better not mention it. I am extremely glad that you have such pleasant accounts from our friends at Hunsford. Pray remember me to them, and do go to see them, with Sir William and Maria. I am sure you will be very comfortable there.

Yours truly, Jane Miss Elizabeth Bennet to Mrs Charlotte Collins Longbourn, Hertfords.h.i.+re, January 22 My dear Charlotte, I am commanded to send you my sister Jane's best wishes, and I do so gladly, knowing that you will be happy to receive them. Mr Bingley, alas, is not so willing to receive them, or rather, I suspect, his sister is determined that he should not have them. Jane has been three weeks now in London and has finally seen through Miss Bingley's protestations of friends.h.i.+p, having been treated coldly and with incivility. Miss Bingley wishes her brother to marry Miss Darcy, and she is determined that Jane shall not come between them. From everything Mr Wickham has said of Miss Darcy, she will make him abundantly regret what he has thrown away in Jane, being an imperious girl, every bit as proud and disagreeable as her brother.

It seems that everyone is playing us false this New Year, when at the end of last year everything seemed so promising: Jane unhappy, and my own situation not much better, though I believe I have a temperament which can better bear the loss. Mr Wickham has become less and less attentive, and although my head applauds this turn of events, my affections cannot be so triumphant. I still think him one of the most charming young men of my acquaintance, but his poverty has caused him to transfer his attentions to Miss King, who has recently inherited ten thousand pounds. It is an inducement, is it not? Though I believe that I would have been his choice had his fortune permitted it.

I am looking forward to visiting you in March.

Your friend, Lizzy Mrs Gardiner to Miss Elizabeth Bennet Gracechurch Street, London, January 22 My dear Lizzy, I know you have heard from Jane, and so you are aware that Miss Bingley has been a false friend to your sister, and that Jane does not intend to see Caroline again. I cannot say that I am sorry. It would have been very difficult for the two young women to be friends when the spectre of the brother's previous affection lay between them. And even if this were not the case, I would not like Miss Bingley as a friend for Jane; she is a very cold and supercilious woman. Your sister has now accepted that her intimacy with the Bingleys is at an end.

But what of you? When last we met you promised me you would not encourage your feelings for Mr Wickham. Have you been successful in your endeavour, or is he still a favourite with you? Let me know how you go on.

Your affectionate aunt, Margaret Miss Elizabeth Bennet to Mrs Gardiner Longbourn, Hertfords.h.i.+re, January 24 My dear aunt, I have that to tell you about Mr Wickham which will please you more than it pleases me: his attentions are at an end. I am now convinced, my dear aunt, that I have never been much in love; for had I really experienced that pure and elevating pa.s.sion, I should at present detest his very name, and wish him all manner of evil. But my feelings are not only cordial towards him, they are even impartial towards Miss King, to whom he has transferred his affections.

I cannot find out that I hate her at all, or that I am in the least unwilling to think her a very good sort of girl. There can be no love in all this. My watchfulness has been effectual; and though I should certainly be a more interesting object to all my acquaintance were I distractedly in love with him, I cannot say that I regret my comparative insignificance. Importance may sometimes be purchased too dearly.

Kitty and Lydia take his defection much more to heart than I do. They are young in the ways of the world, and not yet open to the mortifying conviction that handsome young men must have something to live on as well as the plain.

Your loving niece, Lizzy

FEBRUARY.

Mr Charles Bingley to Mrs Bingley Bath, February 10 Dearest Ma, Caroline said that I looked seedy, she thought London was not doing me good and she persuaded me to take a house in Bath, so here we are. Upon my honour it is lively enough but somehow the concerts and amus.e.m.e.nts do not entertain me as much as I thought they would. I am glad you are coming to stay with us; I am looking forward to seeing you again and you must stay until Easter.

I thought of going back to Netherfield Park next month but as I would have to see Miss Bennet again, and as Darcy and Caroline a.s.sure me that Miss Bennet had no affection for me, I have decided against it. I think it would be hard to be with her and know that she did not care for me. I am not complaining. She is an angel and can do far better I am sure, for I am a very ordinary sort of fellow. Come soon, Ma, you will like it here. If Ned cannot tear himself away from business, then come without him.

Your loving son, Charles Mrs Bingley to Mr Charles Bingley Yorks.h.i.+re, February 12 If that girl doesn't think she's the luckiest girl alive to have won your affections, Charles, then she's not worth a candle. There are plenty of other girls who know a good thing when they see it. You'll have them falling all over you before long, you mark my words. Never you fret, your old ma will be there next week and we'll have a high old time of it. Is that friend of yours, Mr Darcy, there? How is Caroline getting along with him?

Your doting Ma Mr Charles Bingley to Mrs Bingley Bath, February 14 Dear Ma, Caroline thinks she is getting along very well with Mr Darcy but she is no further forward than before. He is not in Bath; he has gone to stay with his cousins in c.u.mbria. Caroline wanted me to take a house there also but I told her I will not chase Darcy round the country like a puppy and so she has had to make do with Bath.

Your loving son, Charles Mr Darcy to Mr Bingley Fitzwater Park, c.u.mbria, February 19 Dear Charles, I have just had a letter from Georgiana and she asked after you particularly. I know how much she enjoyed your company over Christmas and I hope you will come to stay with us at Pemberley after Easter.

I find myself in the middle of unusually clement weather up here in the Lake District, thank G.o.d, for you know how much I detest bad weather in the country. But the days are fine and we spend them out of doors, sailing on the lake, riding, fis.h.i.+ng, and taking outings to entertain the ladies. They are all of them very accomplished and they paint and sketch; they are as pleased as we men that the weather is fine.

Maud is well and my G.o.dson is thriving. He was christened yesterday. He has a fine set of lungs and he displayed them to us throughout the ceremony. Maud made several comments about wanting to repay me by standing G.o.dmother to my children and exhorted me to provide her with them without delay. My aunt was of the same mind and introduced me to a very pretty young woman by the name of Miss Barton; however, I made it clear to her that I have no plans to marry this year.

The rector, Mr Grayson, accompanied us back to the Park and I was glad of it for I wanted to ask if he could recommend a deserving young man to fill the living of Kympton. It is only eighteen months since I had to appoint a new inc.u.mbent when Mr Rogers died, but now his successor has met with an unlucky accident and I am having to fill the living again. Luckily Mr Grayson was able to recommend a young man who is newly ordained but who is known to Mr Grayson personally and sounds very promising. I mean to speak with him tomorrow and see if he would be suitable.

The only complaint I have to make of my present circ.u.mstances is that my aunt is fond of charades and I am obliged to play, though I avoid it whenever I can.

I hope you are well entertained in Bath. Pray write to Georgiana and let her know how you get on-she has never been to Bath and she is longing to hear all about it. I know that Caroline and Louisa have promised to write but I believe Georgiana would value a letter from all of you. I have encouraged her to reply to everything she receives, as it will give her some practise in the art of letter writing, which will be very useful to her.

Darcy Mr Bingley to Mr Darcy Bath, February 25 My dear Darcy, Of course I will write to Georgiana. You should bring her here, there are concerts and b.a.l.l.s and all manner of entertainments. She is a little young for some of them, to be sure, but Caroline is convinced she would like the libraries and the firework displays and begs me to ask you to join us here as soon as you return from c.u.mbria. One of my younger sisters is here, who is not yet sixteen, and two of my younger brothers, and they are all very taken with the place. My mother is enjoying herself, too.

Have you heard anything from Colonel Forster? You will remember we met him in Meryton. I have written to him several times to ascertain his thoughts on the war. It seems a long way away, but my brother Ned is interested in the future of the hostilities because it affects the future of trade. Upon my soul, Ned has done very well for himself and we are all very proud of him, though Caroline says he needs to buy himself a new coat.

You will like to hear something of our neighbours at Netherfield. Colonel Forster happened to mention something about them in his letters and it seems that Charlotte Lucas has married Mr Collins. Did you know? If you remember, Mr Collins was the cousin of the Bennets, and also, I believe, your aunt's rector. If you go to Rosings at Easter as usual, it seems likely you will see her there.

Bingley

MARCH.

Mr Darcy to Mr Bingley Fitzwater Park, c.u.mbria, March 7 My dear Bingley, I knew of Mr Collins's marriage, as you surmised. Hurst heard something of it as we left Netherfield and he happened to mention it to me. It seems that Mr Collins proposed to Miss Elizabeth Bennet at first but was refused and then found more favour with her friend. He is fortunate in his wife, I think-I remember Miss Lucas as being a sensible young woman.

I have given the living of Kympton to Grayson's protege, Mark Haydock. I heard him preach as part of his duties as the curate of Highwater, and my aunt invited him to Fitzwater Park so that I could see something more of him. He is young, intelligent, sensible and committed to the church, whilst understanding the foibles of human nature and being prepared to encounter them in all their forms. He is popular with the people hereabouts as he does not preach, unless it is from the pulpit, and yet he sets a good example in his daily life. He attracts a great deal of attention from the ladies, as he has a handsome face but he does not trade on it. I think he will do very well.

Darcy Mr Mark Haydock to Mrs Haydock c.u.mbria, March 7 Mama, I have had a piece of astonis.h.i.+ng good fortune. The Fitzwilliams have guests and one of them is a cousin of theirs, a Mr Darcy of Pemberley in Derbys.h.i.+re. He happened to need a rector for one of his livings and I was recommended to him. In short, he has given me the living! It is a great thing for me, a very great thing indeed, the kind of preferment I could only dream of. The living is a handsome one and, from all I hear, the rectory is a fine house in large gardens. Mr Darcy himself is an imposing gentleman. I was nervous of him at first, although he is not many years older than I am, for he has an air of pride about him, but once I began to know him, I found him to be intelligent and-I will not say agreeable, for he remained aloof throughout our meetings-but at least not disagreeable. I think I have been very lucky and I have given thanks for it, you may be sure.

I am to travel to Derbys.h.i.+re at the end of March and take up my duties shortly thereafter. I will write to you when I have any more news.

Your loving son, Matthew Mrs Charlotte Collins to Miss Elizabeth Bennet Hunsford, near Westerham, Kent, March 10 Dear Eliza, The daffodils are out and the banks outside the parsonage are covered in them. Mr Collins has spent the morning digging up some of the bulbs and moving them around the garden, a healthy recreation which I have encouraged, though I believe they looked prettier where they were.

He is a little out of sorts at the moment. When we went to Rosings Park for dinner last night, Lady Catherine happened to mention that her nephew, Mr Darcy, had been looking for a new vicar to fill the living of Kympton and I could tell that Mr Collins hoped he might be given it, for it would have meant an extra two hundred pounds a year. He began to say that he had been most impressed with Mr Darcy when he met him at Netherfield, and that it would be an honour to serve such a bountiful man, but hardly were the words out of his mouth than Lady Catherine finished by saying that Mr Darcy had already appointed a Mr Haydock. Mr Collins was disappointed, I could see, but he immediately remarked that he was sure a nephew of Lady Catherine's could never appoint anyone unworthy to such an important position, and to console himself with the fact that Mr Darcy may have other livings to give.

I hope you have not forgotten your promise to visit me. I miss you, Eliza, and I look forward to seeing you and to showing you my new home. My father and sister are to set out on the twenty-third and you promised to be one of the party, you know. Indeed, I quite rely upon it. We are unlikely to leave Kent for some time, Mr Collins being unable to leave his duties, and I would like to remind myself of my Hertfords.h.i.+re life and Hertfords.h.i.+re friends.

Your friend, Charlotte Miss Elizabeth Bennet to Mrs Charlotte Collins Longbourn, Hertfords.h.i.+re, March 15 My dear Charlotte, How can I refuse you? Besides, I am looking forward to seeing you again. The arrangements have all been made, and even improved, for now we are all to stay with my aunt and uncle for a night on our way down to Kent. We will be leaving Longbourn on the twenty-third and as it is only twenty-four miles, there will be plenty of time for us to spend the morning shopping and the evening at the theatre before we leave again. We will be with you by the twenty-fourth.

I am longing to see Jane again. She writes to me often but although she takes great pains to make sure her letters are cheerful, and although I know she loves being with our aunt and uncle and our troop of little cousins, I know she still misses Mr Bingley. That odious Caroline! She has deliberately separated them, I am sure of it, and that odious Mr Darcy! He is as bad as Caroline, if not worse. Who are they to decide how Jane and Bingley shall be happy? What business is it of theirs? And now Jane is pining for him. I hear it in her letters, for try as she might she cannot make them as lighthearted as they once were. But I console myself that I will be with her again soon and then I will be able to better judge how far she is from recovery.

I must confess that, quite apart from the joy of seeing you and Jane again, I will not be sorry to get away from home. Mary practises the pianoforte, very loudly, for hours every day and my only escape is to go for a walk; which, as the weather is cold and wet, brings me no pleasure. Kitty and Lydia are worse than ever. Colonel Forster's new wife is very young and just as silly as my sisters, and she is always having parties where they dress up and make a lot of noise, laughing with the officers. Officers are all very well, but I confess since the loss of the attentions of one, the others hold very little interest for me.

He is still friendly, still attentive, but in a different way. He makes it clear by small words and looks and gestures that he is not free to marry as he will, and I understand him perfectly. We are still very much of one mind on most things, however, and, whether married or single, he must always be my model of the amiable and pleasing. It is perhaps a good thing, then, that I am to go away, for it cannot be long before he marries Miss King and I would rather not be here when the wedding takes place.

Your friend, Lizzy Miss Mary Bennet to Miss Lucy Sotherton Longbourn, Hertfords.h.i.+re, March 23 Most n.o.ble Friend, My sister Jane is in London still and my sister Elizabeth has left for Kent, which means that I can practise on the pianoforte for hours together without any interruption. To be sure, Mama says my playing gives her a headache and Papa asks if I would not rather be outdoors, and Kitty cries whenever I approach the instrument, but these are no more than the ordinary obstacles which fall into the path of the Learned Woman.

Mr Shackleton agrees with me. I discussed the matter with him this evening, when we both dined with my aunt Philips, and he said that the lives of the great were always fraught with difficulty.

I was prevailed upon to play the pianoforte after dinner. I was just embarking on my second sonnata when I was alarmed to find Mr Shackleton's arm around me. He was shocked when I reproved him and said that I had mistaken his motives entirely, explaining that he had merely been reaching round me to turn over the pages of my music.

Harmony was restored, as I remarked to him as I embarked on a third sonnata, and he laughed at my witticism and said that I should make a note of it in my book of extracts. I have duly done so. My only regret is that no one ever reads the book. I am sure my sisters would benefit from it, for it would be sure to impart learning and wisdom to anyone who opened its pages. I have tried to encourage Lydia and Kitty to read it, and to be sure Lydia started to do so, but she only laughed when she read that Mr Shackleton had had his hand on my knee, and Kitty was no better, saying that there should only be one n in sonnata.

Your sister under the skin, Mary Miss Elizabeth Bennet to Miss Susan Sotherton Hunsford, near Westerham, Kent, March 24 You will be anxious to know all about my visit to London and my arrival in Kent, and so I sit down now to write you a letter.

Jane was very happy to see me and I to see her, as you can imagine. We have been apart for a long time and we had much to talk about. But on questioning my aunt later, I found that my dear sister has periods of dejection, and who can blame her? She has lost the attentions of a most amiable young man, through no fault of her own, and does not see how she will ever meet a man she likes half as well. I sympathise with her deeply, for I am no luckier in my attachment to Mr Wickham, but I believe my spirits are of a sort to better bear the disappointment. Besides, I was not separated from him by others, but by his own choice, and that I think makes it easier to bear.

Through all this, though, I cannot help blaming Mr Bingley, for if he was as much in love with Jane as he appeared he should have resisted his friends' efforts to influence him and followed his heart; which leads me to think that it is possible for a young man to be too amiable. But even as I write this I remember Mr Darcy saying that Mr Bingley was easily swayed by his friends; how much more blameworthy, then, must those friends be for influencing someone they knew would not be able to resist. But blame will not help Jane, and I believe that she is in the best place, where there is congenial company and plenty to do.

The company here at Hunsford is not so congenial. Charlotte is the same, but I cannot place such confidence in her as formerly, for I cannot forgive her for marrying such a stupid man. She has a home, it is true, and a life of her own, but the price she paid is a heavy one and although she does not resent it, I resent it for her. Oh, why can there not be as many amiable and sensible young men in the world as there are women who deserve them! She welcomed me affectionately, however, and I was very pleased I had come. Despite everything, I miss her. Meryton is unfortunately not supplied with so many sensible young women that I can easily bear the loss of another one.

Mr Collins was in all his glory, displaying the good proportions of the rooms, their aspects and their furniture-everything from the sideboard to the fender-and showing us around the garden, pointing out the numbers of fields beyond. Sir William and Maria were as admiring as he could have wished for, pleased with everything they saw and exclaiming over the sight of Rosings Park in the distance.

Luckily I did not have the right shoes for walking over the fields, nor did Maria nor Charlotte, and whilst Mr Collins conducted Sir William thither, we three returned to the house. With Mr Collins forgotten there was an air of comfort throughout, and I believe he is very often forgotten. And when he cannot be forgotten, and says something particularly foolish, then Charlotte is wise enough not to hear.

We are to have the honour of seeing Lady Catherine at church on Sunday, and I am a.s.sured by Mr Collins that she is all affability and condescension; although I was warned by Mr Wickham that she is authoritative and self-important, and I suspect his judgement is the true one. Apparently, she is likely to include Maria, Sir William and myself in every invitation issued to the Collinses for the length of our stay-courtesy indeed!

And so our time is to be spent sharing Charlotte's daily activities, which will be enjoyable enough. It will only be made vexatious when we are interrupted by Mr Collins or patronised by Lady Catherine.

Then, my dear Susan, I will have more pleasures to look forward to, for my aunt and uncle have invited me to go on a tour of the Lake District with them in the summer. I am already looking forward to it.

Write soon and tell me all your news.

Lizzy Miss Susan Sotherton to Miss Elizabeth Bennet Bath, March 25 Dearest Lizzy, Your letter makes me ashamed-I have not written to you in an age, for my Mr Wainwright is keeping me busy. I have been to visit his family and found them all charming, and a wedding date has been set. We are to be married in August. My mama is very happy, for it is a better match than she hoped for me, and I am overjoyed, as I truly love my Mr Wainwright. Papa is happy, as Mr Wainwright's mother has insisted on arranging the wedding, so it will not cost Papa a penny, and he went out to celebrate by getting drunk. Frederick, however, said he wished me happy and gave me a small present, a brooch, bought with money he had saved himself from his inheritance from our late aunt. Although it is not a large fortune, it is not inconsiderable and he has begun to husband it, spending less than its income so that he is gradually restoring the capital. News of this has spread and he is no longer shunned so resolutely by the Bath mamas. Eleanor is now more hopeful of finding a husband for herself, and Lucy hopes that Frederick will restore the library at Netherfield so that she might continue her studies there when we return home. If we return home. But as Jane no longer needs Netherfield to be let to Mr Bingley, I hope we will return home sooner rather than later. Alas, until Papa mends his ways it is not likely.

I am glad that Charlotte is happy. I wish her many fine days and a husband who is busy elsewhere. And to you, Lizzy, I wish fine weather for country walks and a handsome stranger.

Your dear friend, Susan Miss Elizabeth Bennet to Miss Jane Bennet Hunsford, near Westerham, Kent, March 26 My dearest Jane, I have had my first sight of Lady Catherine de Bourgh. We dined at Rosings last night and saw her in all her glory. She is a tall, large woman with strongly marked features and a sense of self-importance which rendered Sir William speechless and reduced Maria to perching, in fright, on the edge of her chair.

Miss de Bourgh was as unlike her mother as it was possible to be, for she was thin and small, with insignificant features; there was neither in face nor figure any likeness between the ladies.

The dinner was exceedingly handsome, and Mr Collins could not have been happier as he took his place at the bottom of the table, by her ladys.h.i.+p's desire. Lucky Mr Collins, to be so easily pleased! He commended every dish, his flattery echoed by Sir William, so that I wonder Lady Catherine could bear it; however, she seemed very pleased. We ate almost in silence, although when we retired to the drawing room after dinner, there was a great deal of talking, all on Lady Catherine's side. She held forth at length, enquiring into Charlotte's domestic concerns and giving her a great deal of unnecessary advice, and then turned her attention to me. Oh, Jane! I could scarcely keep from expressing my astonishment at her impertinence when she asked about my sisters, demanding to know if any of them were handsome or likely to be married soon, where they had been educated and what kind of carriage my father kept! She then demanded to know about our governesses, and on learning that we had none, remarked that our mother must have been a slave to our education! I did not know where to look, nor how to keep from smiling! She then deigned to tell me that my sisters should not all be out at once, and was surprised when I answered her back, saying that I saw no reason why the younger girls should not have their share of society and amus.e.m.e.nt as well as the older. I do not believe anyone has ever answered her back before.

The gentlemen soon joined us and we played at casino, but there was no conversation that did not pertain to the game. When Lady Catherine and Miss de Bourgh had played as long as they wished, the tables were broken up and the carriage was ordered, and I was asked for my opinion of Lady Catherine on our way home. I gave what praise I could, but Mr Collins was not satisfied and took matters into his own hands, praising Lady Catherine as he felt she deserved. He had not done by the time we reached the parsonage, and he followed me upstairs so that he could continue singing her praises. It was only when I bid him a firm 'Good night' that he gave over, but I heard him saying, 'affable...condescending...' to Charlotte as they went downstairs.

How I am to manage here over the next few weeks I do not know. I am sure I will find it more and more difficult to remain silent whilst Lady Catherine gives her decided opinion on everyone and everything; however, I am determined to be on my best behaviour for Charlotte's sake.

Sir William will be here only for a week and will then return to Meryton, but Maria will stay here for six weeks with me. I wish you could be here, too, Jane, but I am persuaded you will be much happier where you are.

Your loving sister, Lizzy Miss Jane Bennet to Miss Elizabeth Bennet Gracechurch Street, London, March 30 Dearest Lizzy, Your letter made me smile. I am sure I am glad it is you and not I who have to face Lady Catherine; she sounds to be as formidable as I had expected. I am very glad to be here with my aunt and uncle instead. We have had fine weather since you left and I walk in the park with the children every day. We have been to the theatre again and this evening we go to a concert. My aunt has invited a number of young men to dine. She says nothing but I know she is hoping to help me over my disappointment by reminding me that other young men exist. And indeed, I know that they do, only none I like as well as...But there, I will not mention his name, it is better not. He is destined for another and there is no use repining.

I have had a letter from Mama, telling me not to hurry home, for she is sure there are many more eligible young men in London than in Meryton. Lydia included a note, asking me to send her a sketch of the latest fas.h.i.+ons, for she is going to one of Colonel Forster's b.a.l.l.s, and Kitty asked me for some sa.r.s.enet. My aunt and I are going to Grafton House tomorrow to buy it. Mary has asked for some music, as she is planning to play a sonata. I cannot help thinking that there will be little call for a sonata at a ball.

Your loving sister, Jane

APRIL.

Mrs Charlotte Collins to Miss Susan Sotherton Hunsford, near Westerham, Kent, April 14 Dear Susan, As you know, Elizabeth is our guest at the parsonage, together with my sister, but what I think you do not yet know is that Mr Darcy is here also, staying with his aunt Lady Catherine. He has only been here a few days and yet I suspect as much as I did last autumn that he is attracted to Elizabeth, though she persists in thinking he does not like her. It is possible that he looks at her only to find fault with her, as she thinks, but I do not believe it. When Mr Collins went to pay his respects to Mr Darcy and his cousin Colonel Fitzwilliam, who is also a guest at Rosings, the gentlemen returned to the parsonage with him. I am sure that Mr Darcy would not have waited on us so soon if Elizabeth had not been here. He had little to say for himself, but his eyes were drawn to her and at last remembering his manners, he enquired after the Bennets. Eliza could not resist saying that Jane had been in town for three months and asking if he had seen her, to which Mr Darcy replied that he had not. Elizabeth pursued the subject no further and I think Mr Darcy was happy to let it drop. However, he continued to look at her until he and his cousin returned to Rosings.

We dined with Lady Catherine, and Mr Darcy was once again very attentive to Elizabeth, as was his cousin, and I am not surprised for Elizabeth was at her liveliest. Even Lady Catherine demanded to have her share of their conversation. When coffee was over, Colonel Fitzwilliam invited Eliza to play the piano and Lady Catherine engaged Mr Darcy in conversation, but the latter abandoned her soon enough and walked over to the piano to listen to Eliza. He positioned himself so as to be able to see her face and Elizabeth teased him, saying that he had come to frighten her. He looked surprised, but not displeased. I am sure he has never met anyone like Elizabeth before. She continued to tease him, saying to Colonel Fitzwilliam that Mr Darcy had danced only four dances at his first Meryton a.s.sembly. I thought he would be angry, but instead a smile played about his lips. He is ready to fall in love with her, if he is not in love with her already. I wish she would show him some encouragement, for I am sure he would offer for her if she did. It would be a brilliant match for her. Mr Darcy is a man of consequence and wealth, and moreover he is very well-thought-of hereabouts. His cousin joined in with the teasing, saying that Mr Darcy would not give himself the trouble to talk to strangers, and instead of being angry, Mr Darcy took it all in good part.

But that is not all. This morning, Maria and I walked into the village and when we returned we found Mr Darcy in the parsonage, and learnt that he had been talking to Elizabeth for half an hour. I was sure he must be in love with her, or he would never have called on us in such a familiar way, but when I said as much to Elizabeth, she said that he had been silent for most of the visit. It is very odd, but I cannot shake the feeling that he is deeply attracted to her. I do not want to press the idea with her, however, because I do not want to raise expectations which might only end in disappointment. But if she were sure of his affections, I think her dislike of him would evaporate, and why should it not? He is tall, handsome, intelligent, well-bred, wealthy...the sort of man that any woman would be proud to call husband.

I cannot help thinking that it would be a good thing if Lizzy were to marry him, for he has several wealthy livings at his disposal and it would be no bad thing if Mr Collins were to be appointed to one of them. But only time will tell.

Charlotte Mr Bennet to Miss Elizabeth Bennet Longbourn, Hertfords.h.i.+re, April 16 Lizzy, You will no doubt be surprised to receive a letter from me, though I half promised one, but I find I cannot manage without you here at Longbourn. Your sisters grow sillier every day and your mother is no better. Without you and Jane, all sense has gone and I am longing for your return. I am sure that you will find it difficult to tear yourself away from Mr Collins, and I know that my company cannot possibly compensate you for the loss of his sensible and erudite conversation, but I miss you, Lizzy, and I am writing to hurry you home. Come as soon as you like; it cannot be too soon for me.

Your affectionate Father Miss Elizabeth Bennet to Mr Bennet Hunsford, near Westerham, Kent, April 18 Dear Papa, I will come as soon as I can, but it will not be for a few weeks, I fear. Charlotte depends upon me to remain with her until the start of May and my aunt Gardiner expects me to stay for a few days with her before returning home. Though I doubt if my sisters will ever be sensible, yet something might be done to curb the worst of their excesses and in the process you might make them better companions for yourself. Lydia would benefit from some attention and Kitty, too. At present they have nothing to think of but red coats. Could you not give another turn to their minds? I doubt if they will ever become scholars but there are some books in the library they might like; if you will take the trouble I am sure you will find them willing to give over at least a small portion of their day to rational enterprise.

There is very little that is rational here, save Charlotte, of course. She tends her household and her parish with great success. Mr Collins continues to flatter Lady Catherine, who accepts every word graciously as though it is her due. Maria is in awe of everyone and everything. Mr Darcy stares us all out of countenance-yes, he is here. It is not so very surprising, I suppose, as his aunt is Lady Catherine. What pleasure he gains from his visit I cannot guess, since his aunt's behaviour is such as to make any sensible person blush. But perhaps he likes it. I suppose he must, for he is his own master, and he could just as easily spend Easter in Derbys.h.i.+re or London if he had a mind to do so. Instead he plagues us here at Rosings.

Your loving daughter, Lizzy Mr Darcy to Mr Philip Darcy Rosings Park, Kent, April 20 Philip, this letter might surprise you, or then again, not. I think you guessed that I was speaking of myself when I wrote to you about an inferior woman at Christmas, and not Bingley as I protested; or, at least, not entirely about Bingley, for it is true that he was attracted to a woman of inferior birth and that I saved him from an imprudent attachment. But it is my own case that now concerns me, for I was also enamoured of a woman who was unsuitable in every way.

I first met her at a local a.s.sembly and paid no attention to her, thinking her, quite rightly, beneath my notice. But the more I came to know her, the more I came to be intrigued by her, for her quick wits and lively intelligence stimulated me and made me want to know more of her. I began to seek her out, enticed by her conversation, which gleamed like a vein of gold amidst the dull talk and endless flattery of everyone else around me.

I found myself looking forward to seeing her and I started each day by wondering when and where we would encounter each other. My pulses quickened and the blood ran more swiftly in my veins whenever she entered a room. I was alert, where usually I am bored. I was further attracted by the fact that she was not in awe of my wealth or my position and that she treated me as she would anyone else. She was constantly challenging me, making no allowances for my name or fortune, in fact she seemed to delight in teasing me and tormenting me. She had a way of looking at me, as if daring me to cross swords with her, which fascinated me; it called forth all my instincts, base and otherwise, and made me so far in danger of forgetting myself that on more than one occasion I was tempted to kiss her. I did not do it, of course, but the urge grew stronger and stronger, and the energy I needed to resist was becoming more and more powerful, until I felt that I was in some danger from her.

I knew the remedy: to avoid her. But by some unlucky chance her sister became ill whilst visiting Bingley, and when Elizabeth called to see her sister, Bingley invited her to stay. I was thrown more and more into company with her and it was not long before I had to admit to myself that I was at risk of being overwhelmed by my feelings entirely. Where I had once thought she had not one good feature in her face, I found myself thinking her uncommonly pretty, with a pair of fine eyes which, when she teased me, sparkled. And tease me she did. What is more, I looked forward to it.

But I was still not lost, at that time. I recognised my weakness and I attempted to control it by putting her in her place, to remind her-as well as myself-that she was beneath me. But every attempt I made failed. When I asked her if she wanted to dance a reel, she saw at once what I was about, and knew that I wanted her to admit to liking the unrefined dance. So instead she outwitted me, replying that if she said yes I would despise her taste, so she would refuse-then challenged me to despise her if I dared. And indeed I did not dare! Or, rather, I did not want to, for she had outmanoeuvred me and I felt nothing but admiration for her.

I was still enough the master of my feelings to resist her charms, however, and to force myself to avoid her whenever I felt it necessary. But the pull towards her was so strong that when Bingley left Netherfield Park for a few days to attend to business in town, I followed him. I gave as my reason my concern for his attachment to an unsuitable woman; but I was just as concerned, if not more so, about my own unsuitable attachment. I encouraged him to remain in town, away from the object of his affections-and away from mine. I was sure that, with no reason to return to the neighbourhood, I would soon forget her. And for a time it seemed that I was right. Back in my own world, I saw the folly of becoming entangled with someone from such a low level in life. I knew that she would never be able to fit in with my kind; that, in short, it would never lead to anything but disaster.

And so I occupied myself with business and friends and family, taking myself off to c.u.mbria and surrounding myself with people I knew. But thoughts of her would intrude at the most inopportune moments and I found myself comparing every other young woman I met to her-unfavourably, I might add. None of them had her playful disposition or her lack of deference or her complete unconcern for my position, my wealth, or indeed anything else that young women usually court.

How things would have turned out if I had not visited Rosings I do not know, but the fact of the matter is that I did visit Rosings-indeed, I am still here-and by some unlucky chance she was here also.

I never thought to meet her in Kent, but her friend had lately married the rector of Hunsford and Elizabeth is visiting her friend. There! I have said her name. It is a name which haunts me and plagues me and delights me and gives me no peace.

Elizabeth.