Sube Cane Part 25

"Or, we have a very fine course in _Philanthropy--the Science of Giving_. This course contains a lecture by Carnegie, one by Hettie Green, one by William Jennings Bryan, one by Jess Willard--no, that's another course--"

"That's interesting; very interesting, but--"

"Then perhaps I could interest this manly little fellow in something.

The Inter-State Correspondence Schools make a specialty of the interests of boys, I might say. Are you interested in athletics, my lad?

Baseball? Boxing? Broad-jumping? Football? Sailing? Swimming?--"

[Ill.u.s.tration]

Biscuit's interest was at once apparent.

"Plain and fancy swimming and diving, surfboarding, how to dodge the breakers, how to cheat the undertow, rescue and resuscitation--can you swim, my lad?"

"No, sir, but I wisht I could."

"We have a very fine course in swimming, madam. We positively guarantee to teach swimming in ten lessons or money refunded. All the latest strokes: overhand, trudgeon, crawl, shoulder-stroke--"

"No, not to-day," interrupted Mrs. Westfall. "It's too dangerous. I don't want my boy going into the water."

"Aw, mama, let me learn to swim!" whined Biscuit. "I'm the only boy in town that can't swim!"

"Karl! Be still! It's too dangerous!"

"Pardon me, madam, but it is no more dangerous than playing the piano!

By our up-to-date system the student is taught to swim without so much as touching the tip of his finger to the water!"

"A lot of expensive apparatus, I suppose."

"No apparatus whatever! We teach it in the home! Only the smooth top of a kitchen table is required. Individual instruction by mail. And bear in mind that our iron-bound guarantee goes with every course. Money back if not satisfactory."

"How much does it cost?" she asked weakly.

"A mere trifle, madam, when we consider that it may be the means of saving this little fellow's life!"

He laid a blank on the table and produced a fountain pen.

"But the expense?" insisted Mrs. Westfall as she saw him filling out the blank.

"Not enough for a person in your circ.u.mstances to consider-- Sign there."

She took the pen and poised it uncertainly over the dotted line. "Before I sign this I ought to know--"

"A mere trifle--sign there--an inconsequential nothing--on the dotted line, please--two dollars--"

She signed her name.

"Two dollars a lesson, with our iron-bound guarantee. Thank you, madam!

Many thanks! Keep the duplicate for your own reference. And I am leaving you a complete catalogue of our courses. You may be interested in something else later on. And now I will wish you--"

And thus it happened that Biscuit Westfall learned to swim.

Undoubtedly the proudest moment of his whole life was the one when he received his diploma from the Inter-State Correspondence School. To the unprejudiced eye this diploma looked more like the doc.u.ment that is drawn forth from the spy's boot in the war melodrama, than the sheepskin of a scholastic inst.i.tution. It was decorated with stars and garters, wafers and lozenges; but to Biscuit's unsophisticated gaze it was quite the most important doc.u.ment since the Declaration of Independence.

If Biscuit had worked hard, so had his mother. She had taken a peculiar interest in demonstrating the truth of her oft-repeated a.s.sertion that one may learn to swim before going into the water.

She replaced without complaint the oilcloth on the kitchen table which had gone to pieces under Biscuit's efforts to master the scissors-kick.

She sewed on in silence the numerous b.u.t.tons that came off. She darned without comment the knees of many stockings that gave way before the edge of the table. And she paid with unaccustomed cheerfulness the cost of each lesson as it arrived. Whether Biscuit or his mother was prouder of the diploma when it came, would have been hard to tell.

The swimming lessons remained a dead secret until the course was completed and the diploma actually in the hands of the graduate. On one or two occasions Biscuit had been unable to suppress the intelligence that he knew something he wasn't going to tell, but as n.o.body had pressed him for particulars, the news came as a distinct surprise. And it was divulged on the same day that the diploma was received.

When the usual swim was proposed, instead of starting dolefully for home as had been his wont, Biscuit slapped the proponent on the back and cried:

"All right! I'm with you!"

"Huh?" asked Sube with a blank stare.

"Uh-huh, me! Why not?"

"Your mother gone away?"

"No, course she ain't!"

"Maybe you've learned to swim on dry land!" taunted Sube.

"I sure have!" replied Biscuit with a lofty swagger. "I can swim better'n any you fellers. I can do the trudgeon and the crawl and the scissors and--"

A howl of derision went up.

"Shut up a minute, you fellers!" shouted Sube. "I want to ask 'im some'pm."

Sube was not familiar with the terms Biscuit had so carelessly torn off, but he was none the less impressed. He had a strong suspicion that there was something back of it all.

"Who showed you how?" he asked, concealing with an effort the real extent of his interest.

"I took lessons!"

"Who of?"

"Oh, a perfessional."

"Yes, you did!"

"Well, I did, and I can prove it!"

"Yes, you can! How can you prove it?"

"I'll show you!" cried Biscuit as he started for home. "You wait right here till I get back!"

"He won't be back," predicted Cottontop; "let's get a move on us."